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Thread: Sending your kids to private school ?

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    With that it makes me think the article is really a misguided hipster rant. They could send their kids to rub shoulders with all the other elite kids but that is too "mainstream". Why not go through the metal detector experience, it's not like they will have to actually live like that and it makes her seem cool.
    As I posted earlier, I didn't want to dwell on the possibilities along these lines. But since you raised the issue a fair amount of commentary is now appearing ... such as and


    Trying to circle back to the original question, IMHO the question of a parent choosing to send their child to a private versus public school forms a fairly complex equation these days. Not every private school is 'good', and not every public school is 'bad'. The cost of sending a child to a 'good' private school is substantial. But in point of fact, there are major costs associated with purchasing / renting a home in a location that allows access to a 'good' public school ( i.e. the 'tuition' costs for that good public school come in the form of high housing prices and high school taxes ). Where certain careers are concerned, attending a private school may allow for 'connections' to be made that will pay off big time later in life. Where certain other careers are concerned, attending a private vs public school will make little if any difference. Thus a different evaluation is really necessary for every individual child and situation.
    Last edited by Melonie; 08-31-2013 at 03:10 AM.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by Melonie View Post
    Indeed you are correct to point out that the 'tech boom' created quite a few multi-millionaires ... where creative and inventive risk takers were well rewarded for their original ideas. But that covers less than 1% if the '1% ers'. And granted that there are quite a number of actors, musicians, pro sports players who receive multi-million dollar rewards for their unique abilities. That covers another 1% of the '1% ers'. Another much larger group were born into the 1%.

    In truth, for those not lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time with a marketable original idea, or for those not lucky enough to be born with an extraordinary personal talent, amd for those not born with a proverbial silver spoon, it is far more common for persons to wind up earning 1% paychecks by being hired into the upper echelon of an established business. That requires that otherwise 'locked' doors be opened.
    The examples I gave were all high tech, but there are plenty of business owners in other fields, such as builders or restaurant owners, who have become very wealthy, and are in the top one percent. There may even be some strippers. Not too long ago, someone here posted an article about a 33 year old stripper who was pulled over, and the police officer found $1 million in cash she made from dancing. If she has that much in cash, she could possible be in the top one percent. She definitely is for her age.

    The writers of the book, "The Millionaire Next Door", spent twenty years researching the wealthy in America. From their research on the wealthy they found, "more than 80 percent are ordinary people who have accumulated their wealth in one generation".

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    ^^^ well, where those builders and restaurant owners are concerned, how many of them reached out to 'connections' for venture capital, for political and legal help etc. when first starting their business ??? Granted in those particular businesses the 'connections' being reached out to may also be affiliated with an organization that has little to do with 'elite' prep schools and universities.

    No your dancer example doesn't qualify for the 1% ... which by IRS definition is someone earning ~$312,000+ per year. Accumulated wealth isn't a criteria in and of itself. I myself have accumulated a reasonable amount of wealth over a period of many years working as a dancer. But I never ever earned $312,000 per year. I never held a position which was able to exert significant influence.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    College can really help. The college I graduated from is a top one for communications and art and many famous actors, broadcasters, etc attended there. On the other hand many just have the fancy diploma but nothing to show for it.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    I don't plan on having kids for a few years, but I don't mind the idea of sending my child to a non-religious private school if their teaching methods are something I agree with. The private schools in my area are very successful in prepping students for college or whatever the next level of education is. I care a lot about education and would only want the best for my kids. I could see myself sending my kids to private school in grade school and middle school and then transitioning them to public school in high school so they're not 'sheltered' or unrounded, providing that it is a superior public school. However, if they wish to stay in private school they will. I will always make sure my children have extremely good resources for their educational path.
    "Rather have my feet hurting than my pockets."

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by eagle2 View Post
    Sadly, there are people who really believe "the Flintstones" is based on fact. This photo is from the Creation Museum in Kentucky:

    The Creation Museum is a gigantic joke. Even funnier ( although somewhat scary ) are the people who truly believe that the Earth is only 6,000 years old ; that dinosaurs co-existed with people etc. They recognize dinosaurs because how else would they explain all the bones and fossils ? I can make an argument that some of these parents who send their kids to Christer schools are committing child abuse - their kids are being educationally handicapped and not just in the sciences. You should read the history books those kids read. Rife with error and inaccuracy so that they'll grow up thinking that the U.S. is the "bestest" country ever because God loves us more than other countries and peoples .

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by Melonie View Post
    ^^^ well, where those builders and restaurant owners are concerned, how many of them reached out to 'connections' for venture capital, for political and legal help etc. when first starting their business ??? Granted in those particular businesses the 'connections' being reached out to may also be affiliated with an organization that has little to do with 'elite' prep schools and universities.

    No your dancer example doesn't qualify for the 1% ... which by IRS definition is someone earning ~$312,000+ per year. Accumulated wealth isn't a criteria in and of itself. I myself have accumulated a reasonable amount of wealth over a period of many years working as a dancer. But I never ever earned $312,000 per year. I never held a position which was able to exert significant influence.
    Eagle is trying to resist distinctions between the rich and wealthy and more importantly those who made their wealth vs. those who inherited it. The 1% is made up of a LOT of people who inherited their money. Their ranks are filled out by those who made their fortunes. Maybe if he spent more time in Palm Beach , the Hamptons , Newport etc. he'd understand what we're talking about. Or if he went to college with a lot of preppies like I did.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    I'm SO down with private schools.

    We went the private route for preschool, but decided to try out public school this year-since the public school system in our county is ranked amongst the top 10 in the nation. So from an education standpoint to us it seemed like private really wouldn't outweigh public in this particular case.

    BUT, as a parent I feel like I had so much more power within the school system when I was paying for school. Public school seems to have a 'don't like it? Too bad' attitude, which is SO different from my personal experience with private school.
    Last edited by MyButter; 09-03-2013 at 09:25 PM.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    the public schools where I grew up were really nice and many of my rich friends went to them. but no one school is equipped to serve every type of student and forcing everyone to go to the school in their district isn't going to change that.

    its not a matter of "good" or "bad," its what your child needs. many public schools in low income areas have fantastic programs (I volunteered at one) for helping students graduate and helping esl students. they also dedicate many of their resources to providing services for abused kids, those with absent or addict parents. these schools aren't failures but they will certainly fail your kid if you're expecting lots of ap classes and other advanced opportunities. likewise, most of the low income kids at the private school I went to felt alienated and disillusioned and ultimately couldn't keep up with the expensive books and field trips and sat prep classes. they would have done well and gone to a good college if they went to a public school but became burnouts because the private school made them feel like failures.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by MyButter View Post
    BUT, as a parent I feel like I had so much more power within the school system when I was paying for school. Public school seems to have a 'don't like it? Too bad' attitude, which is SO different from my personal experience with private school.
    But isn't that more reflective of the real world though? Like... you can try to have influence over your child's life, but at the end of the day, the more you try to influence their lives, the more they rebel against you.

    I probably have a different approach though, because I'm more of a "let things just happen as they are supposed to" kind of girl. But I do feel like that is more reflective of how the real world works.



    Quote Originally Posted by Melonie View Post
    ^^^ I would make the point that attending CERTAIN private schools can begin a chain of 'elite' education which continues on through an 'elite' college to an 'elite' career. While this is certainly not well publicized, it is about the only way that still exists for a middle class child to have a shot of eventually joining the 'top 1%'.
    I'm pretty sure that only applies to like... 3-5 cities in the entire U.S. though. LA & NYC being the most important. But even then, those schools are so overcrowded that you basically have to win an enrollment lottery to get your child in now.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    ^True. It definitely *is* a reflection of life! Wow! lol

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by Eric Stoner View Post
    Anybody send their kids to private school ? Would you if you could ? Would you feel guilty if you did ? If you do, is there any guilt for doing so ?

    According to Allison Benedikt at Slate , people who send their kids to private school are "bad people". Her words, not mine. According to her EVERYBODY should send their kids to public school no matter how lousy and/or dangerous they might be. Not to worry , in a generation or two , thanks to parental support , outrage , pressure, involvement etc. the public schools will all be great. This from a woman who admits that in four years of high school she read exactly one book and self describes herself as culturally illiterate. She's also the same gal who hates her own dog for getting old and sickly.

    I'm sorry but I cannot make this stuff up.

    Giving the politics, sociology and educational policy stuff a wide berth, was she serious ? Does she write this stuff just to provoke people ? Or do her editors at Slate really think her stuff qualifies as intelligent discourse ?
    I would send my children to private school because I went to very low-class "ghetto" public schools in which drugs, gangs, and violence was all around. Frankly, public schools are not safe anymore. In public schools; I learned that little girls can get knocked up at the age of 11, you can become a leader of a gang at 12, and sell crack at 15. I want a better life for my children

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    I probably wouldn't send my kinds to a private school. I watched a documentary about posh nursery schools called "Nursery University" (you can read about it here: http://www.nydailynews.com/entertain...ticle-1.361279 ) and I came to the conclusion that 'ain't nobody got time for that'.

    On a more serious note, private schools are extremely insular. If I had children I would want them to be well rounded... not just bubble-dwellers with limited life experiences. The WORLD is not a private school... there are all kinds of lifestyles/people/backgrounds that you interact with on a daily basis... I think private schools limit the ability to learn that.

    So yeah.... Nope.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    OMG, this has GOT to be one of the most shocking things I've ever seen. I mean, they're going out of their way to mix in to the topic. If I were teaching evolution, I'd teach evolution, and not feel the need to specifically point out anything about God. I know that the real reason is that the people teaching this also have their doubts, but seriously, poor kids. Scary. Much scarier than a public school. Ugh. And a lot of public schools are pretty scary.

    I'm just hoping that you made it up, but I'm pretty sure that you didn't.

    Quote Originally Posted by eagle2 View Post
    I have nothing against anyone sending their child or children to private school, as long as the school provides a quality education, and not this:


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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?


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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by DonaDiabla View Post
    I would send my children to private school because I went to very low-class "ghetto" public schools in which drugs, gangs, and violence was all around. Frankly, public schools are not safe anymore. In public schools; I learned that little girls can get knocked up at the age of 11, you can become a leader of a gang at 12, and sell crack at 15. I want a better life for my children
    Public schools really depend on the area. The public schools here are highly ranked and the scores are among the highest. It's party because of the area and environment. Where I grew up used to be nice but is now a ghetto and there is no way I would send kids to a ghetto school. Part of the difference is because of parental involvement because many ghetto schools have little parental involvement but out here they are.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by DonaDiabla View Post
    I would send my children to private school because I went to very low-class "ghetto" public schools in which drugs, gangs, and violence was all around. Frankly, public schools are not safe anymore. In public schools; I learned that little girls can get knocked up at the age of 11, you can become a leader of a gang at 12, and sell crack at 15. I want a better life for my children
    I went to some questionable public schools back in the day... we would have at least one real fight (in the class) every month. Fights happened in the school often.

    I kept my nose in the books and stayed out of trouble. I think the teachers appreciated that. I scored so highly on the standardized tests that I made the entire district look good. I was befriended by the gals in my class for the most part. The boys were alright. We were all cool with one another. Some of the kids even invited me to church with their families. I went and it was nice. At some point, I was accepted to another school...

    I went to private school the following year. Almost immediately, I was relentlessly bullied. I was picked on. I was harassed. I was pushed into (and smacked into) a tree by a boy(!!!) from my class... hard. I had clumps of my hair ripped out. I had my bookbag thrown under a bus. I had nearly a dozen basketballs thrown into my face while I was trapped in an area I couldn't get out of. I had food thrown at me. I had my chair pulled out and kicked out from under me more times than I can count. People wouldn't let me sit near them. They'd constantly say the meanest stuff if I was nearby.

    I wasn't well off. I didn't live in the area. I was the scapegoat for damn near everything and the punchline to every joke. The teachers didn't intervene. No matter who I turned to, I was brushed off. I was threatened with expulsion at least half a dozen times because everyone hated me (for some reason... I guess because I was different than their status quo). My family didn't want to take me out of the school because it was prestigious and they thought my life would be fucked up forever if I were to leave. I stayed to fulfill their expectations. I stayed for three straight years.

    It was absolute HELL.


    I don't want to make all private schools seem so friggin' grim. But those kids don't like people who aren't like them. It's not an easy fit. And the lack of diversity can foster viciousness that is almost unimaginable.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    ^^

    That's horrible but not surprised. I have heard stories of kids (usually scholarship kids)from a different income level going to a private school with rich kids and not being accepted.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    ^^

    That's horrible but not surprised. I have heard stories of kids (usually scholarship kids)from a different income level going to a private school with rich kids and not being accepted.

    That's meeee!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    I can see why they do it. I don't agree but they don't want others not like them to be in their midst. Not all rich people are like that, my parents have several millionaires who are friends and they were never like that.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    I know that the real reason is that the people teaching this also have their doubts, but seriously, poor kids. Scary. Much scarier than a public school.
    While this is in no way intended to contribute any credibility whatsoever to dinosaurs with saddles, in the interest of fairness there are more than a few things that are taught with conviction at public schools that are 'unproven' - and a few things are taught that are outright incorrect.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by Melonie View Post
    While this is in no way intended to contribute any credibility whatsoever to dinosaurs with saddles, in the interest of fairness there are more than a few things that are taught with conviction at public schools that are 'unproven' - and a few things are taught that are outright incorrect.
    Can you elaborate what you mean, I am curious. I do agree with you btw as some of the things taught in public schools horrify me. I have caught wrong things in history books for example.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    ^^^ where should I start ? Columbus discovered America ?

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Great point Melonie and yes much of the things mentioned in the history books are so wrong (and very slanted). The Civil War was another thing that is lied about in history books as well.

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    Default Re: Sending your kids to private school ?

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    I can see why they do it.
    Can you? Because I certainly can't... *shrug*
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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