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Thread: Was this a real connection?

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    Default Was this a real connection?

    I went to a club the other night when I was on a business trip. I am not a major strip club customer but I am not inexperienced, either - I have maybe gone to clubs maybe 15 or 18 times in my life, and I am in my early 40's now. I am married and have kids, and I do have shame about visiting clubs, honestly, but it is a temptation. It was a weekday and there were literally only 4 women in the club. Three were not my type, and I quickly got talking to a woman who I thought was quite attractive. I will guess she is about 25 (I didn't ask), and during our initial small talk she mentioned she has a 3 year old kid. I quickly agreed to pay $100 to spend some private time (in the corner of the club but out in the open) which was supposed to be 30 minutes. It was not clear to me exactly what I would be getting for that money, but I sure as hell wasn't going to pay $300 for a VIP room. She sat on my lap and we talked for a few minutes. Before I knew it we were making out like two teenagers who had never experienced the touch of the opposite sex. I had no idea that this happened in clubs but I was swept up by the moment. There was plenty of deep tongue. Arms, legs writhing. Sucking face, hungrily. It was FUCKING AWESOME! It felt so good. It really made me feel like a man - and I mean that in the best way possible. It was completely and utterly electrifying. But it also was very gentle, passionate and sexy - not gross. This woman had very beautiful eyes and I told her so. She said she could kiss me all day. We looked into each other's eyes a lot of times. We would come up for air, take a drink of water, then go back for more, passionately. She snuggled in to me and said she loves how warm my hands feel. She said I have beautiful eyes. I told her she has beautiful lips, which she does (full but not too full). It went on for about 40 minutes. After a fair amount more time the manager came over and told us time was up. She did ask for a tip which I was more than happy to give. I was completely blown away. I love my wife but our intimate life is nothing like this - I don't blame her, but that's just the truth. She said can we see each other when she get off work at 3am. I'm sure I would have except I had an important business meeting first thing the next morning and had several more hours of preparation time to do. I told her I would be interested in seeing her again when I am back in town again. She wrote down her name (stage name, I'm sure) and cell phone. I searched it on the internet and it appears to be a real cell phone number.

    I am still thinking about her. It is true what they say about kissing being more intimate than sex. I don't know, I don't think someone could totally act that into it for so long unless they were really, really good at acting - and very deceptive. I think we had a real connection. What do you think?

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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    I think she's 25, does this with every customer, and has no interest in a 40-year-old man besides his wallet. I also think it's extremely shitty of you to cheat on your wife and then fret about whether you had a "real connection" with someone whose real name you likely don't know. But at least you have a seemingly real cell phone number--and why not? You tipped!


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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    The four of them sat lazily, biding their time checking facebook on their phones. Weekdays were the worst, but it only took a single person to turn her shift around. Sometimes cliches are true for a reason; you'll find it when you least expect it. She certainly wasn't expecting it to come walking in in the pants of a middle-aged married man, but there it was...the unmistakable bulge. The scent of old worn leather and aged paper filled the air, nearly intoxicating her. Could it be? No...it was too much to dream. But still, she could feel it in her body, and more importantly, in her heart. The unmistakable yearning; the call that wrenched her from her seat and towards him like sirens luring pirates of old to their demise. She nearly fell into his lap with sweating palms and a racing pulse. There...right there she felt it. Even bent in two it was thick, oh God so thick! Every time she tried to catch her breath he'd move and she felt it in his pants. She straddled it, the feel of it drivng her wild. She had to do something before the other three took it away from her. It was hers, she needed it. So she kissed him and gave in to her body's passion, for she had found it. The wallet of her dreams.
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol


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    Veteran Member Jasmine.Doll's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    I just threw up in my mouth.

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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    My only remaining question is how is it that you ladies do not have all of the money?

    It would appear my gender has given away all its remaining brain cells.

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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    Thank you for the reality check. I needed it.

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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    seriously we only care about your bank account! get a life!

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    God/dess whirlerz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    This whole section's like a train wreck scene I cant stop visiting..


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    Quote Originally Posted by whirlerz View Post
    This whole section's like a train wreck scene I cant stop visiting..
    I've said it before (years ago) and I'll say it again. Everytime we get a "I think she really likes me post," somewhere out there is a dancer who did her job well and sold that fantasy. Rather than lamenting the customer's naivete, we should celebrate her skills. The alternative is a thread full of "so listen to this stripper shit I heard tonight" posts. As ridiculous as it sounds, I actually envy him. I wish I could leave a strip club thinking that some beautiful, way out of my league sexy thang actually liked me.
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    You had fun, that's all that matters. However her asking for a tip would let me know there is NO connection.

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    God/dess simone87's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    aww guys don't blow up the poor girl's spot haha. yes it was TOTALLY real. now go back there and get a REAL vip what's a measley 600 when you can have a real connection and an "electrifying" experience?
    what i find most disturbing is the way ppl throw around the word "intimacy" and "connection" when they get an erection over a new person. that's the opposite of intimacy, its the thrill of the chase and of somebody you do not know intimately.

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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    Quote Originally Posted by fendergibson99 View Post
    really, really good at acting - and very deceptive.
    ^That sums a lot of us up (except we are more convincing and persuasive than deceptive ) !
    “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” -Marilyn Monroe

    "True sexiness has many facets-confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. It isn’t just about trying to look sexy; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical"-Dita Von Teese

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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    The four of them sat lazily, biding their time checking facebook on their phones. Weekdays were the worst, but it only took a single person to turn her shift around. Sometimes cliches are true for a reason; you'll find it when you least expect it. She certainly wasn't expecting it to come walking in in the pants of a middle-aged married man, but there it was...the unmistakable bulge. The scent of old worn leather and aged paper filled the air, nearly intoxicating her. Could it be? No...it was too much to dream. But still, she could feel it in her body, and more importantly, in her heart. The unmistakable yearning; the call that wrenched her from her seat and towards him like sirens luring pirates of old to their demise. She nearly fell into his lap with sweating palms and a racing pulse. There...right there she felt it. Even bent in two it was thick, oh God so thick! Every time she tried to catch her breath he'd move and she felt it in his pants. She straddled it, the feel of it drivng her wild. She had to do something before the other three took it away from her. It was hers, she needed it. So she kissed him and gave in to her body's passion, for she had found it. The wallet of her dreams.
    ^50 Shades of Green .
    “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” -Marilyn Monroe

    "True sexiness has many facets-confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. It isn’t just about trying to look sexy; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical"-Dita Von Teese

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  21. #14
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    OK, you have done your job. You can feel good because I can confirm I have felt humiliated reading through all the replies. The one I appreciated most was the first one, because it was very direct. Most of the rest were just sort of piling on.

    I am going to challenge you, though. It’s easy for you in this forum amuse yourselves and bond with each other by cleverly dissing me. I’m sure you have every reason to be cynical, given that most customers are disgusting, and of course women are in it for the money – why the fuck else would they do it?

    You probably have an extra amount of disdain for me because I have a wife and family, and you are right to feel that way. I told you before I am ashamed that I visit clubs sometimes. Do I remind you of your awful father who disappointed you, or worse? I wouldn’t be surprised.

    When I read back over my original post I realize I look like a fool asking about “connection.” But now let’s peel back the onion another layer. I will reveal more about myself. In return I want you to be honest and get out of your comfort zone. You can either double down and slam me more, or you can admit that I may have a point. Either one is fine, as long as it’s the truth, and you are being honest with yourself, not just with me.

    Here’s the deal. I am honestly sort of a sappy person. My wife actually gets annoyed when I get starry eyed over her sometimes. I love her dearly and would never, ever leave her. Especially not for a 25 year old stripper with a 3 year old kid. God, no.

    So why was I in the club that night? Usual story, I was tired and had been drinking. Not wasted, but definitely buzzed. It seemed like a good idea at the time. I was thinking with my dick, no question about it. But – and I’m not asking for a medal here – I am basically a good guy, loyal (stop laughing), a good father. Other than strip clubs I have never cheated, and I don’t want to.

    Yes, I have a daughter. Would I want her to grow up to be a stripper? FUCK, NO! I would rather die. Why? Because she deserves the best. She deserves to be treated with respect. And strippers do not get treated with respect. It’s that simple. Guess what? I think you deserve better too. You deserve to be treated with respect (most of you, anyway). Everyone does, unless they are a bad person.

    Am I a fucking hypocrite? Yes. But people are complicated. Most are neither all bad nor all good.

    So what was I thinking? I allowed myself to get caught up in the thrill, and maybe my sappy nature made me starry eyed. My wife is the first woman I had a serious relationship with, and we were married young. She is not very adventuresome, the sex is fairly standard, blowjob MAYBE once a year and I have to ask, etc. Now I am getting older. Yes, I look longingly (subtly, I believe) at beautiful young women. I am human. Call me creepy, but you will be older one day, too. When it happens, you are basically still the same person, but you are getting older, too. It sucks.

    So when I wrote up the original account, I was indulging in that juvenile fantasy of connection. That was the naïve part of me coming out, not thinking rationally, but responding to a desire. Yes, men have emotional desires too. I do know that what I had with this woman was not real intimacy.

    I was satisfying a selfish desire. But I am not so selfish that I would ever let my wife find out to “get it off my chest.” That would hurt her deeply, and my kids, and, yes, I would be fucked. I will continue to be a family man – albeit with a couple of secrets.

    Here’s the thing, though. What I really want to know is, not did she have “feelings” for me. That’s ridiculous. Of course she didn’t. What I do want to know is, was it completely Machiavellian, or is it POSSIBLE she could have truly been turned on.

    Yes, she wanted my money. Of course she did. She has a kid at home and is probably a single mom.

    But can’t she want my money and be attracted to me at the same time? I have taken a look at some other forums and sometimes strippers there admit that a few times they have been truly attracted to customers.

    I am definitely more attractive than most guys in these places. I am 6 foot 2, dark, wavy hair with a tinge of salt and pepper at the sideburns. I am not fat, just normal in terms of body type. I have all my hair, I do have pretty nice eyes. I am pretty polite and a good conversationalist. And yes, I am a good kisser. I really am. (And I’m modest…)

    So, now that you know more, could she have been attracted to me AND wanted my money, or is it 100% money?

    You weren't there, I was. She REALLY seemed into it. Listen, I know what faking is like. I have watched plenty of porn. "Fuck me!" That's a turnoff because it's so obviously fake. I wish I could somehow convey to you just how into it this woman was.

    If she was acting, she is better than you. Way better than you will ever be.

    OK, start throwing up in your mouth again. Tear me a new asshole. Let me have it.

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    Veteran Member Renton's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    lol jesus...




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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    Clearly, you know exactly what went down. You met the bestest stripper ever (who lacks daddy issues, like the rest of us) who was super into you b/c u are a good family man, attractive and SUPER modest. So... Why did you come here to ask for our opinion? So you could get mad, insult us then go on believing in your ridiculous fantasy?


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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    Dude. Take your money and go to counseling with your wife. Even if this girl was turned on or liked you or whatever else, it's just totally fucked that you're more concerned about that than you are about your marital issues. Strip clubs count when your tongue ends up down another woman's throat. Yes, I have extra disdain because you're cheating (and justifying not telling her), and it has nothing to do with my father (oh, yay, another stripper with daddy issues joke--what was that about us deserving respect too?). It has to do with the fact that I respect marriage/other committed relationships, and all the shitheads that come into the club and on here and bitch and moan about how their boring wives drove them to cheat sicken me.


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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    She wants you. Call her, right now!

    PinkGeisha: "NOTHING IMPRESSES A CAMMODEL MORE THAN A GUY THAT LETS HIS MONEY DO THE TALKING"


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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    OK, you have convinced me - you are right. This feedback is helpful. I am being a douchebag. I needed to hear it. I need to look in the mirror.

    I am sorry for insulting you, it was a reaction to the snarky comments, but it was uncool. I am not being sarcastic, I really mean it.

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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    Clearly there must be links to this site from a men who do not get enough abuse at home website.

    Why would you post before reading and getting a feel for what goes on here, wow.


    Jasmine Doll, it is entirely your fault that I cannot drink coffee while reading this site, the starbucks is going to short out my monitor

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    God/dess rickdugan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    Fender, that same girl probably has plenty of handsome and chiseled guys her own age who she could dial up whenever she wanted. Yet within a few short minutes of meeting you, a guy over 15 years her senior, her raw sexual excitement took over and she couldn't stop herself from pouncing. Taking a step back out of your emotional neediness and looking at this objectively, does that really make sense to you?

    Seriously dude, you need to dial back the sensitivities a bit. A strip club is an expensive place to seek emotional validation as some of these girls make a living by doing exactly what you just experienced. The ladies on here tried to give you the straight dope, but your need for validation is so strong that you are refusing to accept that you were just X of YY served that week.

    But wait, even though she is a stripper, she is still a girl like any other, right? No girl could possibly be that good an actress, right? LOL, that is exactly the type of thinking that sucks inexperienced guys into paying lots of money to certain dancers. But of course that is just the cynic in me talking and I have no doubt that this girl is different.

    Anyway, some guys need to go through the cycle of elation, realization and, finally, butt hurt feelings, at least once (and some several times) before they get it. Maybe you're one of those guys. If so then just try to keep a reality handle on yourself and good luck.

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    God/dess simone87's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    wtf is inherently wrong with 25 year old girls with 3 year olds? and daddy issues? you are sounding like a bit of a snob dude. so you wouldn't LEAVE your wife, you'd just cheat on her..yes cuz that's the easy way. SURE, she could have been into it..because anything it possible. probable? no, but possible. sure. you are right, we weren't there. why ask for our opinion then

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    Veteran Member EvelynHeartsYou's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    I'm going to let everyone else rip you apart for the insults and projections of feelings, and focus on something else you said.:

    Quote Originally Posted by fendergibson99 View Post
    So what was I thinking? I allowed myself to get caught up in the thrill, and maybe my sappy nature made me starry eyed. My wife is the first woman I had a serious relationship with, and we were married young. She is not very adventuresome, the sex is fairly standard, blowjob MAYBE once a year and I have to ask, etc. Now I am getting older. Yes, I look longingly (subtly, I believe) at beautiful young women. I am human. Call me creepy, but you will be older one day, too. When it happens, you are basically still the same person, but you are getting older, too. It sucks.

    So when I wrote up the original account, I was indulging in that juvenile fantasy of connection. That was the naïve part of me coming out, not thinking rationally, but responding to a desire. Yes, men have emotional desires too. I do know that what I had with this woman was not real intimacy.

    I was satisfying a selfish desire. But I am not so selfish that I would ever let my wife find out to “get it off my chest.” That would hurt her deeply, and my kids, and, yes, I would be fucked. I will continue to be a family man – albeit with a couple of secrets.
    Hiding things from your partner or family so you can save your own ass takes away their right to have a choice. How is that not hurting them, too? Then you find a way to justify it to yourself instead of saying, "Hey, maybe we have some communication issues and need find some time to talk about our expectations, needs, and boundaries."
    Like Tuesdaymarie said, take your money and go get some counseling to find out why you're emotionally broken enough to think this was an acceptable reaction to your marital problems, and maybe learn some new ways to constructively communicate with your wife.


    "I can fix your flat tire. Show me your vagina" -JoJoX

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  37. #24
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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    Nothing is inherently wrong with them. If I was single and her age and actually knew her as a person, who knows? What I meant was it would be ridiculous for me to entertain any concept of "being" with this woman (and I don't entertain that concept) given the reality of my life (and I'm sure she'd feel the same way!). It's just patently ridiculous to even think about. Not that she would not be inherently worthy.

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    Default Re: Was this a real connection?

    I'm going to do myself a favor and ignore your snarky comments about strippers with daddy issues and how you'd rather die than see your own daughter become a stripper, and just focus on one of your questions: how could she possibly act that into if she wasn't? You're right - you were there, we were not. But, I'll be honest with you for a second, it is actually far easier than you think for sex industry professionals to fake it. Porn is one thing - you go into it knowing it's fake, and it seems the industry is built off of the over-the-top acting that everyone expects and knows is fake. But having someone in-person deliver you a personalized experience is different.

    You're not just watching a movie and critiquing a girl's reactions to some other guy - you are experiencing it first-hand which makes it way easier to get sucked in. And I promise you, this was not the first time that girl has made out with her customers. Everything gets easier with practice. Everything. I'm an escort now, and I'll think the entire time how horribly transparent it was that I was faking pleasure/an orgasm/whatever. But at the end of the appointment, I'll get a text or email going on and on about magical and "organic" everything was. I have clients who are absolutely obsessed with me and send me texts all month long about how they can't wait to see me again the next time I have an incall. Deep down, do they actually know there was no real connection? Maybe. I'm not gonna ask them. But what I do see is that they're still willing to drop hundreds of dollars on a few hours a month with me to experience that "connection." Apparently I'm convincing enough that they're at least able to fool themselves (or just enjoy it for what it is).

    If you didn't have some sort of inkling that this wasn't genuine, you wouldn't have been here asking in the first place. You would've happily gone about your fantasy without questioning it. If she was convincing enough that you feel fine going about the fantasy and paying to see her again to experience your "connection" or whatever, then go ahead. She did her job right. Even if you know it's not "real," that also doesn't mean you can't enjoy it for the escape/experience that it is.

    You're right - nothing is outside the realm of possibility, but please understand that strippers/camgirls/escorts can act that into it to the point of being truly convincing. We are professionals at it for a reason.
    Last edited by Aurora_Sunset; 11-01-2013 at 10:11 AM.
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