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Thread: Shows that mess with your emotions

  1. #1
    Featured Member Staples's Avatar
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    Default Shows that mess with your emotions

    I have just had the strangest experience and I am not sure how to handle it. I have had a show step on an emotional chord that I wasn't expecting to be stepped on.

    I do all manner of dirty shows. I enjoy intense submissive BDSM humiliation play so those shows never bother me. In fact, I have a hard time not chuckling when a guy says something like "I'm going to be really harsh and mean to you bb are you sure you can handle it"? Most of the time the worst thing they say to me is you're a filthy whore. I'm giving them the shocked ashamed reaction they want but all the while inside, I'm thinking pffft... this is like foreplay for a normal Saturday night at a kink party dude.

    Anyway, I digress. This morning I had someone ask me to roleplay that I was his wife and I wanted a baby. I started the show he wanted me to try on lingerie before the actual sex act and talk about whether or not I could wear that particular one while I was pregnant and all that fun stuff. As the show ended 20 or so minutes later, I suddenly had an emotional breakdown and started crying. I had to exit my room immediately.

    Two things,
    First a child is the one thing I feel I am missing and have been wanting for a couple of years. So I'm pretty sure that is the chord that was struck for me.
    Second, I had been on a 7 hour shift and this was my last show so maybe I was just overly exhausted

    Of all the things in the world, I never thought a show like that would upset me.

    I am curled up in bed now and I've texted my boyfriend who is at work to let him know what I'm feeling. He's always good about taking care of me emotionally. I'll definitely be looking forward to a cuddle when he gets home.

    Have you ever had a show unexpectedly upset you? How did you handle it?
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  3. #2
    Featured Member Staples's Avatar
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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    On the plus side, this is the first time ever, that I've made MORE than my daily goal so I'm kinda pumped about that :-)
    Quote Originally Posted by Procrasturbator View Post
    And keep at it. Get up, put on your make up, and sign on. With every second you're online comes the possibility of your next big spender. A customer could show up who will spend enough to make up for all the bad days and then some. You just have to be around for him and working multiple sites increases the chances of him finding you.


    ~No Love, All Hustle~

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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    I'm infertile myself, so that show would have crushed me.
    Luckily, though, no show has ever made me cry. The worst that happened was a gagging show where I teared up and almost threw up.
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    Featured Member Staples's Avatar
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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    Quote Originally Posted by playboymegan View Post
    I'm infertile myself, so that show would have crushed me.
    Luckily, though, no show has ever made me cry. The worst that happened was a gagging show where I teared up and almost threw up.
    I totally almost threw up in a gagging show earlier tonight but I'm a fairly hard core BDSM player when I'm not on cam so those things don't bother me.
    Quote Originally Posted by Procrasturbator View Post
    And keep at it. Get up, put on your make up, and sign on. With every second you're online comes the possibility of your next big spender. A customer could show up who will spend enough to make up for all the bad days and then some. You just have to be around for him and working multiple sites increases the chances of him finding you.


    ~No Love, All Hustle~

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    Veteran Member Camigirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    I don't do shows that will mess with me, if they start to turn that way I lead them off another way. I limit myself with shows that have a role for me to play.
    I can say this disturbed me badly however. I have a few nice friends on most sites I work, so one day I got a message to come to a well known token site and check out this show. So I went into the room, two females no big deal licking boobs and talking dirty to each other pecking each other on the lips and then french kissing.
    A member says to lick her p^ssy. The main performer says no way we don't do that she is MY SISTER! OMG!
    That grossed me out, sorry. Not to mention they have a video of it for sale, and it's against the rules big time! So, I could watch no more. I went to dye my hair red.
    To many that may not seem that bad, to me it was disgusting and sad to even see.

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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    Okay. I think I have an example.

    I was chatting with a guy for maybe an hour on MGF. It was like 2-3am, and I was not planning on camming. He asked me to do a cam show, and I figured what the hell, I'll just do one.

    The way he typed, I assumed he was a slightly awkward, nerdy dude. He sounded funny, and the conversation was fine.

    But, he wanted to Cam2Cam, and he really was NOT what I was expecting.

    He had this DEEP voice...he was probably in his late 20s? He wanted the show to involve me masturbating, but, he turned the show around and started telling ME what to do. He wanted me to 'beg' to be allowed to cum (like...beg A LOT), do shit like ride a dildo hard blah blah blah.

    The way he TALKED is probably why I was uncomfortable I suppose....being called "darling" or being bossed around on cam. I do not do submission shows.

    I guess I just didn't like the fact that he seemed to almost intentionally portray himself ONE way in writing, but he knew once he turned on the cam he was going to do this whole dominant male thing and take me off guard (I could tell because he had asked me if he looked / sounded like what I was expecting???).

    It just made me uncomfortable after...I don't really know why. I just didn't like the 'surprise' of his demeanor, having to talk to him face to face on webcam (he was intimidating), and having to do what he said, despite me NOT enjoying myself, but I was doing it anyways. The whole thing was just awkward.

    I finally just ended the whole stupid show by pretending to be SoOoOoOo desperate to need to cum (I did not). I didn't cam for awhile after that show...I just wasn't happy I kept performing the show despite him freaking me out. He wasn't the type of person I'd want to ever meet or associate with in person. I don't know what the problem was....he just gave me this weird vibe, even through the webcam?

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    Featured Member Staples's Avatar
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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    Quote Originally Posted by CanadianRuby View Post
    Okay. I think I have an example.

    I was chatting with a guy for maybe an hour on MGF. It was like 2-3am, and I was not planning on camming. He asked me to do a cam show, and I figured what the hell, I'll just do one.

    The way he typed, I assumed he was a slightly awkward, nerdy dude. He sounded funny, and the conversation was fine.

    But, he wanted to Cam2Cam, and he really was NOT what I was expecting.

    He had this DEEP voice...he was probably in his late 20s? He wanted the show to involve me masturbating, but, he turned the show around and started telling ME what to do. He wanted me to 'beg' to be allowed to cum (like...beg A LOT), do shit like ride a dildo hard blah blah blah.

    The way he TALKED is probably why I was uncomfortable I suppose....being called "darling" or being bossed around on cam. I do not do submission shows.

    I guess I just didn't like the fact that he seemed to almost intentionally portray himself ONE way in writing, but he knew once he turned on the cam he was going to do this whole dominant male thing and take me off guard (I could tell because he had asked me if he looked / sounded like what I was expecting???).

    It just made me uncomfortable after...I don't really know why. I just didn't like the 'surprise' of his demeanor, having to talk to him face to face on webcam (he was intimidating), and having to do what he said, despite me NOT enjoying myself, but I was doing it anyways. The whole thing was just awkward.

    I finally just ended the whole stupid show by pretending to be SoOoOoOo desperate to need to cum (I did not). I didn't cam for awhile after that show...I just wasn't happy I kept performing the show despite him freaking me out. He wasn't the type of person I'd want to ever meet or associate with in person. I don't know what the problem was....he just gave me this weird vibe, even through the webcam?
    I'm highly submissive and that might have weirded me out just a bit. I definitely prefer to know what kind of show I'm getting myself into.

    I don't as a rule do things that are emotionally upsetting. I just for some reason wasn't expecting the roleplay to trigger me so badly.
    Quote Originally Posted by Procrasturbator View Post
    And keep at it. Get up, put on your make up, and sign on. With every second you're online comes the possibility of your next big spender. A customer could show up who will spend enough to make up for all the bad days and then some. You just have to be around for him and working multiple sites increases the chances of him finding you.


    ~No Love, All Hustle~

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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    Since I'm dominant, both irl, and on cam, the ones where the guy gets into prvt., then turns dominant (especially if we're doing phone), upset me. brings back too many memories of being sexually abused every day since I was an infant. I just log off for a couple of minutes, then shake it off,and start a gold show to change my mood.
    Sorry he upset you so much. It does shake Your core, for sure. I can totally relate.

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    God/dess kortneykay's Avatar
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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    I personally don't think about shows once I'm off my shift. I may joke around about clients outside of work but I don't lose any sleep over them. I'm an actress so I try not to let anything effect me besides my finances.




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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    D: oh gosh.
    well, first, congrats on getting beyond your goal. that's f'ing awesome, and you deserve it.

    Second, I feel ya D: I actually had a similar show about a week ago that brought me to tears because I had *just* miscarried a few weeks earlier. It's weird how the feelings sort of sneak up on you. I had another show that I still don't understand why I was even sad but ended up leaving it and sobbing for like an hour and then eating a taquito pizza to ease the pain.

    I handled it by posting on SW, taking a deep breath, thinking really hard about my feelings and trying to identify them...and then moving on. I took note of how I felt and decided what I was going to do next time I get a request like that, so that I wouldn't be caught off guard.

    I hope you're feeling okay now. :/ <3
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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    I'm feeling much better now that I've had a little bit of sleep.
    Quote Originally Posted by Procrasturbator View Post
    And keep at it. Get up, put on your make up, and sign on. With every second you're online comes the possibility of your next big spender. A customer could show up who will spend enough to make up for all the bad days and then some. You just have to be around for him and working multiple sites increases the chances of him finding you.


    ~No Love, All Hustle~

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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    Every now and then I get a weird vibe..like bam in the middle of the show..ugh. I have a problem with panic attacks anyways, about anything or even nothing... that's when it's "oh you totally want to see my nipple close up now for a few minutes, I know it." time.

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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    HA when I saw this thread my mind immediately went to television. I was all ready to say Breaking Bad,Luther and Homeland.

    But on topic if I get the slightest tinge of guilt or discomfort from a customer I back out sweetly with "Sorry baby I can't help you" Or if it's really bad I just block them zero explanation. I owe them nothing. It takes time to figure out your boundaries.

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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    A show screwed me up once.
    This guy was talking about how he was just back from Afghanistan, and whilst there him and his soldier friends used to go around the villages where women and children were sleeping, and rape the women, and the children.

    He told me how one little girl died of her injuries.

    I didn't know what to do. I could NOT pretend I was turned on by this. I didnt want to end the show abruptly because I think this guy wasn't serious, I think he was doing it to shock me and got a kick out of shocking camgirls and I didn't want to give him this satisfaction....He kept saying things like 'am I shocking you bb' etc.

    After I'd let him ramble on for a while trying not to read what he was typing the show ended. I logged off, ranted to my bf, poured a large G&T and cried.
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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    Quote Originally Posted by sugarmouse0707 View Post
    A show screwed me up once.
    This guy was talking about how he was just back from Afghanistan, and whilst there him and his soldier friends used to go around the villages where women and children were sleeping, and rape the women, and the children.

    He told me how one little girl died of her injuries.

    I didn't know what to do. I could NOT pretend I was turned on by this. I didnt want to end the show abruptly because I think this guy wasn't serious, I think he was doing it to shock me and got a kick out of shocking camgirls and I didn't want to give him this satisfaction....He kept saying things like 'am I shocking you bb' etc.

    After I'd let him ramble on for a while trying not to read what he was typing the show ended. I logged off, ranted to my bf, poured a large G&T and cried.
    I dont know of any webcam site anywhere that he would not be breaking the terms of service talking about things like that. Report anyone who does that type of talk and get them banned.


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    Default Re: Shows that mess with your emotions

    Quote Originally Posted by Staples View Post
    I have just had the strangest experience and I am not sure how to handle it. I have had a show step on an emotional chord that I wasn't expecting to be stepped on.

    I do all manner of dirty shows. I enjoy intense submissive BDSM humiliation play so those shows never bother me. In fact, I have a hard time not chuckling when a guy says something like "I'm going to be really harsh and mean to you bb are you sure you can handle it"? Most of the time the worst thing they say to me is you're a filthy whore. I'm giving them the shocked ashamed reaction they want but all the while inside, I'm thinking pffft... this is like foreplay for a normal Saturday night at a kink party dude.

    Anyway, I digress. This morning I had someone ask me to roleplay that I was his wife and I wanted a baby. I started the show he wanted me to try on lingerie before the actual sex act and talk about whether or not I could wear that particular one while I was pregnant and all that fun stuff. As the show ended 20 or so minutes later, I suddenly had an emotional breakdown and started crying. I had to exit my room immediately.

    Two things,
    First a child is the one thing I feel I am missing and have been wanting for a couple of years. So I'm pretty sure that is the chord that was struck for me.
    Second, I had been on a 7 hour shift and this was my last show so maybe I was just overly exhausted

    Of all the things in the world, I never thought a show like that would upset me.

    I am curled up in bed now and I've texted my boyfriend who is at work to let him know what I'm feeling. He's always good about taking care of me emotionally. I'll definitely be looking forward to a cuddle when he gets home.

    Have you ever had a show unexpectedly upset you? How did you handle it?
    Even though, I am not a cam girl yet as phone actress I can relate to your post. When I start working as phone actress at 18....I did not know too many fetishes and was shocked by listening to the daddy-daughter and pedo fetishes at the first time. It was such a shock to me that I throw up after doing my first daddy-daughter fantasy at 18. But once I reach my 20s; I experienced the world, became more of a sexual woman, and grew more jaded...these fantasies do not affect me anymore. Plus I learned more about becoming a better actress and letting go of my clients' perverted taste. Staples, my point is that happens to the best of us and you will be fine. You just have certain triggers...that is okay You will be fine Best of luck, Staples.

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