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Thread: Trouble with Drinking

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    Default Trouble with Drinking

    Hi ladies! I am a former dancer and have been escorting for a few years. When I started dancing the 1st six months were so much fun for me. I was
    enjoying this industry compared to my old vanilla job and I danced sober. I eventually got tired of being there and began drinking to pass the night by. I enjoyed waking up with cash and not remembering much about the night before. Sadly I made more money being sober but I reached a point where it felt too difficult to stop drinking.

    I told myself I would quit alcohol as soon as I started escorting. I feel so much more relaxed and happy to be there when I drink. I ended up caving in and drinking since day 1 of escorting. I get to the point of tipsy or drunk for every single appointment. If my buzz wears off the appointment goes downhill.
    I can't do this anymore. I worry about how this affects my health. More importantly the decisions I make when I'm drunk.

    I guess what I'm asking is how did you create your persona and hold it for the entire appointment? Back when I began dancing I had a stripper persona. But after I got sick of stripping I dropped the persona and danced as "me".

    Maybe this is a dumb post. It's something I've wanted to post and ask but too embarrassed to write about.

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    Senior Member MomoMania's Avatar
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    Default Re: Trouble with Drinking

    Having a few drinks at work could break the ice a bit and help you to socialize, but beware! If you go into work four to five days a week and you’re having roughly three or more drinks every night you work, then you begin to build a tolerance. This is normally where so many dancers find the excuse to drink excessively. Many feel that they can’t work without having a few drinks in them. Don’t fall into this way of thinking! If you are already there, practice going to work sober and trying the different sales techniques in your persona until you are a beautiful, self-reliant salesperson! This job requires thick skin; you have to be tough! Don’t use alcohol to calm your nerves. Here is where most dancers take their first steps down the road of alcoholism. If you do decide to drink, try not to have more than three cocktails; know your limit. Beer can make you bloated and makes you urinate frequently. Getting too messed up at work could distract you from your sales, how many dances you have done for a customer, and from keeping tabs on your wallet or moneybag. Maybe you should go back to dancing since you seemed to be more together? Even still, if you feel like you've become an alcoholic you might need to change your support system around you or get one at all. Are there any 12 step programs or rehabilitation centers in your area?
    Momo

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    Default Re: Trouble with Drinking

    Back when I was dancing I started out sober but after 6 months I became reliant on drinking. I could not work without getting at least tipsy. I am in such a happier mood, very relaxed, high sex drive, not impatient, and, I don't constantly watch the clock the whole hour while drinking. Right now I have such a high tolerance to alcohol and wanna stop drinking.

    I don't have a problem with drinking outside of work.. I don't drink at all when I'm not working. I just don't know how to find that mindset I first started out in this industry with. I have no idea how to get it back.

    Stripping is something I would never return to. I drank more because I'd hate going from guy to guy hoping the night would go well. With escorting, guaranteed money is very reassuring.

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    Default Re: Trouble with Drinking

    So why exactly does being "you" instead of a persona make you want to drink? Since you started drinking during stripping because of the anxiety from wondering if things would go well or not, why are you not calm now with escort clients and guaranteed money?

    I want to offer suggestions, but I'm having trouble pin-pointing exactly why you feel the psychological need to drink.
    Don't try to win over the haters. You are not the Jerk Whisperer.

    Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.






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    Senior Member MomoMania's Avatar
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    Default Re: Trouble with Drinking

    Have you tried taking a vacation? Maybe a little R&R away from the industry could really help you come back refreshed and ready to start anew. If you're struggling with alcohol, you might need to really take a look the process of pulling out of being dependent on it. You can dance around the topic of alcoholism and give yourself a 1000 excuses, but if it's controlling your life you have to be the one to initiate changes to make you happy.
    Momo

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    Default Re: Trouble with Drinking

    Quote Originally Posted by Aurora_Sunset View Post
    So why exactly does being "you" instead of a persona make you want to drink? Since you started drinking during stripping because of the anxiety from wondering if things would go well or not, why are you not calm now with escort clients and guaranteed money?

    I want to offer suggestions, but I'm having trouble pin-pointing exactly why you feel the psychological need to drink.
    How about habit?

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    Veteran Member thelovelylenee's Avatar
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    Default Re: Trouble with Drinking

    I honestly feel for you as I have experienced this myself in the past to the extent that switching to a non alcoholic or BYOB club was the only option being that the alcohol was so accessible and the atmosphere was so conducive , also I did not drink at home . at all.

    Perhaps AA ? I know that sounds cliche but you may greatly benefit from it . I just honestly feel for you , the possibilities are so scary escorting with a buzz , lowering inhibitions , perhaps not being the safest or screening the way you need to . I would hate for someone to take advantage of you or for you to get something you cannot reverse for the sake of "a drink" .

    If you have repeat customers , perhaps trying to see them more frequently , and doing it sober , get into the mindstate and get used to saying aloud " I don't drink anymore" or " I quit."

    State your sober persona out loud , you kinda bind yourself to being sober because now you'd look awfully funny having a drink in the middle of a session when you just said that you don't. Also may make you a little more used to the idea of escorting sober and you might just be surprised at how good it feels to say it and to have control over your situation. Good luck , hun .

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    Default Re: Trouble with Drinking

    In case you want to try other avenues which are online only you can participate in www.soberrecovery.com They have forums there for all types of addictions and really do help in rough times.

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    Default Re: Trouble with Drinking

    Oh honey I am so sorry!!! But I know exactly where you are coming from. I used to struggle with alcohol and I must say, it is much easier with marijuana. You can't really get addicted, and it relaxes you, and generally just makes life easier. Good luck!!!

    So if you want to be with me
    With these things there’s no telling
    We just have to wait and see
    But I’d rather be working for a paycheck
    Than waiting to win the lottery
    Besides maybe this time is different
    I mean I really think you like me

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