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Thread: My 1st Night

  1. #26
    Senior Member SarahM91's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Yeah, one guy stopped me...he wasn't like...rude or aggressive but seemed really uncomfortable and immature. He was joking about feeling guilty for making me dance since I didn't look like I had been in the industry for long...? He had a thick Indian accent so it was hard to understand. Honestly, after taking some time to think it no longer bugs me. I still made money. I also realized in the full nude club, I need to be entirely naked while giving a lap dance (I would slowly remove my clothes...)...more grinding, more eye contact, more skin.

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    Banned Aniela's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    ^^^^ Def take your time removing clothes, & get creative posing while you do so. Maybe check out a burlesque video or two for inspiration.

    The norm for grinding probably varies by club, but I nvr cared for it & always tried to just do as little of it as I could get away w/. This led me to get creative abt my positions & in the long run, I think really upping the tease factor.

  3. #28
    Senior Member SarahM91's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Do some of you start naked to begin with? Could that work? The second guy I danced for grabbed my nipple with his teeth. I just pulled away gently, laughed and said "rules"...Did I handle that ok?

    I wish we all worked together! Haha. Can I bring you gals with me to work???

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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    I have occasionally started naked, or nearly so, if for example I just got off stage & a customer & I were in a hurry to get dancing b/c of sm time constraint. I didn't make this a habit tho, just usually went to thank them, using my clothes to cover my naughty bits & tell them I need a min to go get put back together, go get dressed & then come back for dances.

    I guess if you're cool w/ being bitten by entitled strangers whose mouths have been God knows where, you handled that ok. I'm guessing he wasn't even polite enough to ask first? Lay down your contact rules at the beginning of the dance. Yu can read up on sexy/diplomatic ways to do this in Hustle Hut.

    But guys who pull this kind of crap, & worse, aren't doing it b/c they like you. They do it b/c they have gotten away w/ it before, & not to be a Doombringer but certain guys are going to try harder to take advantage of you b/c you're new. That's not b/c you're necessarily doing anything wrong -- they are counting on you being naive & sweet & unsure of how to get their $$ w/o allowing yourself to be backed into a corner. A sweet brush-off is not going to be effective. You can still be firm but sexy, & if a guy is pushing too hard for smtg you are not comfortable w/ (& esp might be illegal), End The Dance. There will always be sm1 else w/ $$ to spend.

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    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Quote Originally Posted by SarahM91 View Post
    Do some of you start naked to begin with? Could that work? The second guy I danced for grabbed my nipple with his teeth. I just pulled away gently, laughed and said "rules"...Did I handle that ok?
    Starting naked --- I see no reason to strip all your clothes off before someone has started paying you. I also see no reason to take them off quickly even once the money has started flowing. Take your time taking your clothes off and prolong the tease.

    Customers crossing boundaries -- Deflecting with a giggle is fine for a first, minor offence. Sometimes, you can't be afraid to get stern with them though. You'll also learn how to dance defensively, so that way customers will have a much harder time even trying to cross your boundaries in the first place.

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  7. #31
    Senior Member SarahM91's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    I will strip slowly, and then get naked. All the other girls upstairs were already naked so I thought that's how I should do it.

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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Quote Originally Posted by SarahM91 View Post
    guy I danced for grabbed my nipple with his teeth. I just pulled away gently, laughed and said "rules"...Did I handle that ok?

    I wish we all worked together! Haha. Can I bring you gals with me to work???
    ^If he "bit" your nipple, you could have ended the dance/got him kicked out for that (I suppose it depends on the mileage of the club, but I would have. That's unacceptable to me). Reprimanding him for doing that was the right thing, but remember that YOU make the rules, YOU are in control and the club should/will be on your side if you decide that a customer has crossed the line.

    ...If we all worked together none of us would EVER make any money lol. We are all too at our jobs .
    Last edited by OliveJardin; 12-11-2013 at 11:20 AM.
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  10. #33
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Quote Originally Posted by SarahM91 View Post
    Do some of you start naked to begin with? Could that work? The second guy I danced for grabbed my nipple with his teeth. I just pulled away gently, laughed and said "rules"...Did I handle that ok?

    I wish we all worked together! Haha. Can I bring you gals with me to work???
    Dude I would have clobbered him with my stiletto!!!!
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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  12. #34
    Featured Member Odette's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Biting is definitely not ok, even in this dirty ass city, most clubs should still kick someone out for that, someone bit me on the floor once (wtf is with guys that do this???) and the manager kicked his ass out thank god. A loooooot of the girls/guys in toronto think titty sucking is "the norm" which with a lot of the girls it is (because so many of them do extras, they don't give two shits about it), so it is up to your discretion but don't feel like you have to do it. I don't, and I tell them I don't like that. Telling them why they can't do something--because it makes you uncomfortable--is a huge deterrent to like 75% of the guys you dance for because they're just normal guys that want to have a fun time, they don't want to hurt anyone, and that's enough to keep the good guys away usually. A lot of the time I even add in "I don't even let my boyfriends do that, it just really makes me feel wierd." The ones that still will try and push after that point are nasty fuckers with no respect. If after two warnings they don't back off, feel free to end the dance/yell at them/call a bouncer/rip them off (this is the only time I think this is ok), whatever you feel like you need to do. Most important is that you stay in control, and you guide the situations as they unfold.
    "We can't expect you to just know all the secrets of our top-secret-titty-club!" --Jenna Marbles

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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    ^I find framing it in an "I don't like it" way to be very effective. In most cases, I find that customers that want to suck on my nipples or kiss me or whatever else are doing it in a misguided attempt to make me feel good or otherwise enjoy the dance. Sure, there are some who just want to bite your nipple for the sake of being able to do so, but I find that most just want me to have fun. So, I tend to pull away and say I don't like that BUT I like some other action that's within the rules and I find acceptable. It also helps to be upfront about the things you "like." I try to mention how much I love soft caresses so that customers are deterred from manhandling my girls.

    I've also found going the ticklish route to be effective. Lately, I've had a string of customers who keep wanting to kiss/suck on my ears/neck and I am not there for that. As soon as they move for my neck/ears, before they even have a chance to do anything, I giggle and say that I'm so ticklish there. They don't usually make another attempt, though I do have one that does but I think he just likes to hear me giggle because he never actually kisses/licks...

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  15. #36
    Featured Member Odette's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    ^That is GOLDEN. Definitely giving that one a try!
    "We can't expect you to just know all the secrets of our top-secret-titty-club!" --Jenna Marbles

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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Quote Originally Posted by SarahM91 View Post
    I will strip slowly, and then get naked. All the other girls upstairs were already naked so I thought that's how I should do it.
    I tend to get naked immediately sometimes and other times I wait... everyone does gets naked fast at my club, and the songs at my club are like, 2 minutes long, so there isn't really time to do much of a striptease. I have had customers get annoyed at me for not being naked immediately. But then I've had customers who told me to keep my clothes on. Just play it by the customer.

    On the biting your nipple thing... it depends if you want to get more dances from that person. I've been really forward with guys and that usually leads to them ending the dance. I usually just tell them we can't do that because I will get fired and the bouncers are checking (which they are) and change the subject. Sometimes that works. If they keep doing it I end the dance. If they really won't let up, the chances of them becoming a good regular or even tipping you well are slim, in my experience, and I would rather just dance with someone else.

  17. #38
    Senior Member SarahM91's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    With my music, I was wanting my second song to be this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQ9zLXw4QFc
    My worry is that it's too slow. I love that it's "dreamy" and would encourage me to move more sensually. Opinions please? It's a really great song.

    Also, during my first shift the DJ was a real darling and gave me advice. I wasn't able to tip him then. Should I tip him $20 when I see him again? He was actually really sweet.

    At the beginning of my shift, I paid a $10 house fee. After I tip supporting staff, do I owe the club anything else at the end of my shift or can I just say goodnight and leave?

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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Why would you want to tip the house anymore than you have to? You are contributing enough to their bills by coughing up minimum tipouts & whatever they may take from your private dances/VIP on top of that. They are contributing to :Your: bills by ... Oh wait, they're not.

    As to tipping the dj, exact amts vary by club. I wouldn't advise tipping him tons right off the bat as sm ppl (staff in general, not just djs) might get used to that & come to expect it no matter what. $7 was usually the minimum at most clubs I worked at but I would typically start w/ $10, & as we developped a closer working relationship I would tip more (i.e. He plays my music accordingly, promotes me onstage, depending on club layout keeps half an eye on me in VIP). Djs who did the bare min stayed around $10 & djs who gae me a hard time just got the min. That was my rule of thumb tho, developped based on norms at the places I worked. Tip him a bit extra nxt time you see him, & see how the working relationship develops.

    Other dancers may be able to advise you on music that will make you more $$ at a particular club, but as you gain more exp you will also begin to develop your own style. Mine became lots of pole tricks &'my favourite songs were often mid-tempo to slooooooow, but there are times when you def need to play to the crowd, literally.

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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Quote Originally Posted by audrey_k View Post

    On the biting your nipple thing... it depends if you want to get more dances from that person. I've been really forward with guys and that usually leads to them ending the dance. I usually just tell them we can't do that because I will get fired and the bouncers are checking (which they are) and change the subject. Sometimes that works.
    ^I find that this works when they "try" to do xyz. But, if someone actually bites or hurts you, it's hard to keep going because these types of customer usually keep pushing your boundaries. They are also often hard work if they extend.

    I agree with shannadior about taking the "I don't like that, I prefer this..." approach to discourage that kind of behaviour . This works some of the time.
    “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” -Marilyn Monroe

    "True sexiness has many facets-confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. It isn’t just about trying to look sexy; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical"-Dita Von Teese

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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Quote Originally Posted by SarahM91 View Post
    With my music, I was wanting my second song to be this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQ9zLXw4QFc
    My worry is that it's too slow. I love that it's "dreamy" and would encourage me to move more sensually. Opinions please? It's a really great song.

    Also, during my first shift the DJ was a real darling and gave me advice. I wasn't able to tip him then. Should I tip him $20 when I see him again? He was actually really sweet.

    At the beginning of my shift, I paid a $10 house fee. After I tip supporting staff, do I owe the club anything else at the end of my shift or can I just say goodnight and leave?
    ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS tip the DJ. Seriously IMHO that is the person you do not want to fuck with at the club. I have always tipped well, but I had one DJ who just didn't like me, and he could seriously fuck up my night (like, call me on stage just as a regular is coming in, put on shitty songs, only put me up when guys aren't tipping, put me up the moment I am hooking a customer, refuse to put me up when good customers are at the stage, etc).

    In LA the general rule of tipping is to tip the DJ a dollar a dance-- if its a DJ who's helped me on many occasions I will sometimes do 1.50/2-- but just follow the rules at your club.

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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Quote Originally Posted by OliveJardin View Post
    ^I find that this works when they "try" to do xyz. But, if someone actually bites or hurts you, it's hard to keep going because these types of customer usually keep pushing your boundaries. They are also often hard work if they extend.

    I agree with shannadior about taking the "I don't like that, I prefer this..." approach to discourage that kind of behaviour . This works some of the time.
    If they try it a second time, I'm out. Two strikes.

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  23. #43
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Quote Originally Posted by SarahM91 View Post
    With my music, I was wanting my second song to be this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQ9zLXw4QFc
    My worry is that it's too slow. I love that it's "dreamy" and would encourage me to move more sensually. Opinions please? It's a really great song.
    I pretty much only dance to slower songs. I'd probably give that song a shot myself. Really, there's nothing stopping you from trying it out and never using it again if you find you don't like it. I'll often do that when I'm up and the club is on the empty side.

    Quote Originally Posted by SarahM91 View Post
    Also, during my first shift the DJ was a real darling and gave me advice. I wasn't able to tip him then. Should I tip him $20 when I see him again? He was actually really sweet.

    At the beginning of my shift, I paid a $10 house fee. After I tip supporting staff, do I owe the club anything else at the end of my shift or can I just say goodnight and leave?
    Maybe some of the Toronto girls can chime in with city-specific advice, but I find that tipping support staff isn't a huge thing here in Canada like it is in the States, to the point where it barely makes a difference in the treatment you get. Again, hopefully a Toronto girl can offer some better input. But yes, once you're paid your fee and tips, you're done. Rest assured that if you happened to owe money to someone and were heading out the door, they would stop you!

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  25. #44
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    With regards to starting off naked, some of the girls I work with will walk the floor in open fence net clothes with only a g string on underneath. It seems to get a lot of attention, but what can I say? Less is sometimes more, but if you're walking around naked, you're definitely giving it away for free. At the same time, it means you might attract the wrong type of customer.

    I only started dancing here in the last few months, and a lot of the clothes I had I don't even use anymore because they just aren't revealing enough for me to compete on the floor. I'm even thinking about buying a couple of new outfits that are even more revealing :sigh:

    As for that customer biting your nipple: completely not on! Some of these guys will try anything, so just be on your guard and ready to fend them off if they cross the limits.

    What really annoys me is that Toronto charges such a huge licensing fee for the girls, and yet the government offers no enforcement in the clubs in the way of police checks etc. That licensing fee is a complete cash grab!

    Before I started dancing here, I read up a lot on the SW posts about Toronto, and I just couldn't bring myself to dance there. So I really give it up for you as a newbie giving it a go. It seems like you are getting lots of good advice and support here on SW and I wish you all the best luck there, and for all the Toronto girls!
    "The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me." - Ayn Rand

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  27. #45
    Senior Member SarahM91's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Thank-you again ladies. I go back tonight and begin at 8pm. I'm nervous not only because my period just ended and may come back, but also because of the other girls. I wish women in general didn't work against each other but with each other. I'm not saying you have to share your money making secrets or be best friends...OR friends, but to at least be civil. I'm just going to go in, change ASAP (I'll already have my make-up on), use the bathroom, get out and work. I don't have to even look at the other women. Who else is working? What are your goals?

    In regards to the license, it's ridiculous. I paid for a clearance letter which was $20, and then the license was $360...A lot of money. We spent our last few hundred dollars on this license so I hope it'll be worth it. Once I start getting better, I may try traveling around to see if I can earn more elsewhere.

    Good luck to all you ladies. I'll let you know how my second night went.

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    God/dess arielbriel's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    It's just cause your new. DOn't worry about them. Your goal tonight should be to at least make your license fee back plus profit.

  29. #47
    Senior Member SarahM91's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Not making anything. Some girls go upstairs for like 30 minutes. HOW?! Changing outfits.

  30. #48
    Senior Member SarahM91's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Not making anything. Some girls go upstairs for like 30 minutes. HOW?! Changing outfits.

  31. #49
    Senior Member SarahM91's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    Made $120! YAYYYY!!! Haha, such a loser!

  32. #50
    Senior Member SarahM91's Avatar
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    Default Re: My 1st Night

    I am home sweet home. I made a total of $170 tonight after tip out. I share this because I am feeling significantly better in my hustle. I am more forward with people instead of beating around the bush. Thanks to this website existing and to you beautiful ladies, tonight was a much better night for me. I surprisingly was SO nervous to go on stage...more so than my first time! I don't know why but I was shaking like a leaf.

    Customers were kind however one young guy tried playing with my clit and AGAIN sucking my tit. I'm not a prostitute just because I parade around in my underwear. Geez...
    Time for bed. xo

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