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Thread: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

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    Default Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    I'm 18 and have literally NO FRIENDS. I figured dancing would be a fun place to make money, live out some sexual fantasies (I like being watched naked for some reason) and make some friends. Ugh I'm a total loser. I know ppl warn you the girls will trick you, lie, steal, etc. but I think there are some fun party girls at every club, right? Does anyone have advice for how to make friends or at least be on good terms with everyone?

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    Veteran Member Warped's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    I go to work to make money, not friends. Once in a while I will become work friends with some of the girls but have only hung out with maybe 3 girls outside of work in the 9 years I have been dancing. To each their own, but many girls are there to just work. To be on good terms just be friendly and have a positive attitude in the club, good luck

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Quote Originally Posted by April18 View Post
    I'm 18 and have literally NO FRIENDS. I figured dancing would be a fun place to make money, live out some sexual fantasies (I like being watched naked for some reason) and make some friends. Ugh I'm a total loser. I know ppl warn you the girls will trick you, lie, steal, etc. but I think there are some fun party girls at every club, right? Does anyone have advice for how to make friends or at least be on good terms with everyone?
    Ummm it's a job, not a college mixer. If you want to act out some sexual fantasies go to a swinger's club or an amateur night. "Fun party girls" will smile to your face and stab you in the back, steal your shit, and with a mentality like yours, you'll be none the wiser. I go in to work, I go in sober, I make my money and get the fuck out. I don't speak unless spoken to. I keep my eyes and ears open mouth shut and mind focused. You wanna make friends join a fucking sorority and install a stripper pole in the house.

    It's mentalities like this that is destroying the industry. You need to grow up real quick. You treat this like a party and you are going to be in for a rude awakening.
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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    There are cliques and "party girls" I suppose you could call them. The thing is, typically making money is not these girls priority. Ive noticed over the years in many different clubs that these kind of dancers would rather hang out with each other, or try to look for guys their own age that come in the club they can "party" with. Theyre not hustling OR banking.

    If you want to make friends, maybe you could get involved with a hobby or take a class of some sort.

    Im ten years older than you and been dancing almost 9, and might be a bit jaded and disillusioned, but I wouldn't mix work and your social life too much if youre truly there to make $. Girls will trick you, lie, steal, take advantage, etc. People are warning you of that for a reason hun.

    If you want to be on good terms with everyone, be nice, dont purposefully step on people's toes, and don't get caught up in the drama and gossip.

    You sound like a sweet girl, and I hope this didnt come across as too harsh. My personal motto is that I'm there to make $ (lots of $), not friends. I completely stick to myself and pay no attention to the other girls aside from the occasional friendly chit chat in the dressing room.

    Maybe there's a happy medium in all this. I just haven't personally experienced it. I do hope you can have fun at work and make some friends one way or another :-)

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    I've made friends with other dancers, but mostly from this website. There is a girl that I work with sometimes, but we both have different looks and cater to different people. The only times I've been really friendly with girls from work is when I don't work there anymore and visit the club, then I open up a little more to them since they're no longer competition. Making friends at your job is possible (I don't recommend it), but me and my friend that work together have different looks so we don't compete with each other.

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    God/dess simone87's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    no. i learned that making friends and treating it like a social group was a VERY bad idea when i was a baby stripper. i won't go into the gorey details but i got royally fucked over by a girl to the point of having to change clubs, move, and go through a lot of heart -ache. in the years since then i've made one friend , and i keep to myself other than that. be nice to everyone, trust no one. its really not a game, its a job

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    "act out sexual fantasies and make friends?" no. no no no.

    this is not a party. this is a job, it's a business. if that's what you're looking for, stay the hell our of the club before you're eaten alive. nothing good comes to girls who come into this looking for that. this job isn't about sexual fantasies, it's about using your wits and manipulating people into giving you the most cash you can possibly get, and you will be working with master manipulators who will use you and spit you out if you don't have an extremely astute and intelligent brain between those ears.

    that being said, some of the best women I've ever met are dancers. but they are few and far in between.


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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    The rumours are true, most girls at work are gossips, backstabbers and out for themselves. Sure be friendly and find the girls you get on the best with to chat to when It's quiet and stuff , I do that -but FRIENDS, friends...No. I have those outside of work.
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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Quote Originally Posted by April18 View Post
    . but I think there are some fun party girls at every club, right? Does anyone have advice for how to make friends or at least be on good terms with everyone?
    ^We are ALL "party girls" at some point during the night, usually due to a customer wanting a fun person to socialise and/or drink with. The dancer's who are party girls ITC/OTC, are not the ones you want to emulate or befriend.

    The best way to "be on good terms with everyone" is to be polite, courteous and basically keep to yourself. If you stick around long enough, the girls will warm to you and you will probably make some friendships.
    “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” -Marilyn Monroe

    "True sexiness has many facets-confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. It isn’t just about trying to look sexy; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical"-Dita Von Teese

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Yeah, I don't want to beat a dead horse here, but dancing to make friends is not the best idea. In fact I've lost friends since dancing, and have yet to make a friend dancing. Ok I've gone out with a couple and some of them have been really nice to the point I could talk to about personal stuff, but they also told me personal stuff as well. They were genuinely good people and the club had a lot of those kinds of girls. I got so spoiled there. LOL. That being said, it took me a long time to open up to people and I generally stayed to myself. There's nothing wrong with friendly banter, giving each other positive support, or talking about how the night's going, but that's about where I draw the line. It is good to make friendly with girls just because if they like you a lot of times they will include you in things with their regulars, and clue you in on some money where you can work together. Honestly I wish more girls would work together, especially when it comes to groups of guys. We could all make so much more money by teaming up instead of being selfish. But hey, what do I know? lol. Anyway sorry for the random tangent. I'd say if you want to make good money for future endeavors, be sexy, learn some real life skills, and have some fun I'd say go for it. If you're looking for friends, I'd say go to your local coffee shops to hang out, volunteer, etc. I actually recommend doing any of those things while dancing in order to keep your sanity. You seem like you have a good head on your shoulders and will make a good decision. Good luck!

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Oh, and this website is great for finding activities and like minded people doing things in your area as well http://www.meetup.com/

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Nope. My friends are my friends and my job is my job. I'm not mean to anyone, but I don't want to be friends with my fellow dancers. If I have down time w/o any customers, I like to just mess around on my phone. Making friends at the strip club is a recipe for disaster.

    If you want friends, just go hang out at regular bar (or other social gathering place).

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Be friendly with everyone in the club, but be careful about becoming close friends with them. Do not become close friends with anyone who only talks about how much more money they made versus you (insecure/jealous), anyone who always tries to benefit from you in some financial way at work (lazy), or someone who is nice to people's faces, but talks garbage as soon as their back is turned (drama queens). Every club has one or two two faced c---s who will back stab you for 1$ in two seconds, but will claim to be your best friend. Watch other people from the side, if they are doing something wrong to others, they will do it to you too. Having said that, I have also made some fantastic life long friends over the years in various clubs, although sadly, it's is not easy to make great friends like that in a club atmosphere. Bottom line is: choose your true friends, who will have your back, wisely.

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    I have no 'friends' as I don't hang with any of the other dancers outside the club.

    I see them more as allies or frenemies.

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    I have certainly made a few good friends at the club, though that was never my intention. The more you treat dancing like a job, the better it will be to you. Over the years, I often worked with the same girls and they proved themselves to not be insane, so a few friendships built up. I've also met a couple of girls from here who have also turned into wonderful friends.

    But going into the club looking to make friends with the dancers? That is a recipe for disaster. There are dancers who prey on girls like you -- they will be so nice to your face, want to hang out, etc., but they will use you and fuck you over. It's like they can smell the naiveté and just want to feast on it. Don't be so open to making friends with the girls at work -- be cordial and polite, but you really don't know who you're dealing with in that dressing room. Some girls try to recruit for pimps, and a nice girl like you just looking to make some friends is their prime target. Watch out for yourself, because none of the other dancers will do it for you.

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    There's one girl I worked with years ago I'm friends with, and there's a girl I will speak to at my club and then I'm friends with a waitress that I've known for years. But honestly I try to not make friends because they distract me from speaking to customers.

    I think you are in this for the wrong reasons, it's a job, it's not a party.

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    You can be on "good terms" (or at least neutral terms) by just minding your business and working. If girls want to exchange pleasantries that's fine. But if you really want to make friends who you can party with at work than I don't have much advice on that. I go to work to make money. I'm not rude to anyone by and means, I'm polite, but I certainly don't go out of my way to "make friends" and damn sure wouldn't waste my time partying / getting drunk with other strippers when I could be engaging customers and making money.

    Do you want to make friends or do you want to make money? To me, girls should strip for financial reasons (whatever those may be), not to make party friends or live out sexual fantasies. But it's no business of mine why you strip, it's your choice and your freedom of expression. But stripping is a job, andd the fact that you're not treating it as a job is part of the reason why this industry is going down the tube. Young girls like yourself treat it as a social experience instead of a JOB (no disrespect).

    And remember, in the strip club world: when you make friends who want to drink and party at work, you'll also make some enemies. The party girls are typically full of drama and when strippers get involved in drama it doesn't usually end well.
    "Rather have my feet hurting than my pockets."

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Stripping isn't like a normal job where it's good to have friends there. It's good to be on good terms with everyone so they have no reason to fuck you over, but looking for friends to work with is not only going to be fairly futile, but it'll hurt your money. Most jobs, sure, you dick around with your friends while still getting the minimum done and get paid a set wage for doing so - while stripping, if you're chatting or drinking or checking up on your friends, you're not engaging with customers and you're not making money.

    Every club is different in terms of how friendly girls are to each other, but most places, it's best to just keep to yourself.
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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    I have no 'friends' as I don't hang with any of the other dancers outside the club.

    I see them more as allies or frenemies.
    perfectly said.

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    The club is not the place to make friends with the dancers. For the most part, I find my coworkers are not my kind of people anyways. They won't help you make money, which is the reason you are there.

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    To be clear, I also enjoy my job. I do my job because I am an exhibitionist and I like money. You can have fun at this job. In fact, if you aren't, you aren't doing it right. But friends are not necessary for that to happen. Just enjoy yourself, don't make friends, don't take anyone too seriously and make that money. Stripping is not some big deal. It's a job like anything else and there are no rules set in stone. I've met some great people dancing. It's a personal choice that I do not have friends in the club.

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    There's a wealth of super info here! It helps me a lot too, & is also great advice for the 'vanilla' (regular) job world. I can honestly say, having made my mistakes, that every word here is so true.


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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Quote Originally Posted by Nina_ View Post
    You can be on "good terms" (or at least neutral terms) by just minding your business and working. If girls want to exchange pleasantries that's fine. But if you really want to make friends who you can party with at work than I don't have much advice on that. I go to work to make money. I'm not rude to anyone by and means, I'm polite, but I certainly don't go out of my way to "make friends" and damn sure wouldn't waste my time partying / getting drunk with other strippers when I could be engaging customers and making money.

    Do you want to make friends or do you want to make money? To me, girls should strip for financial reasons (whatever those may be), not to make party friends or live out sexual fantasies. But it's no business of mine why you strip, it's your choice and your freedom of expression. But stripping is a job, andd the fact that you're not treating it as a job is part of the reason why this industry is going down the tube. Young girls like yourself treat it as a social experience instead of a JOB (no disrespect).

    And remember, in the strip club world: when you make friends who want to drink and party at work, you'll also make some enemies. The party girls are typically full of drama and when strippers get involved in drama it doesn't usually end well.
    You give me hope for the next generation. Too bad they're not all like you.
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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    Im technically a "baby" stripper. I'm 20. I see the club like a high school. Most girls are jealous, lie, steal, or are two faced. I'm nice and cordial every night. I also team up with ONE girl every so often because we work well together. Other than that I'm cordial and say bye at the end of the night. Never even exchanged a phone number.

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    Default Re: Dancers: Do you have friends at the club?

    I have no friends and I love it. I have been working with the same girls for 7 months, we chat when it's slow and were all close in like a work way. Which i am thankful for, you dont wanna be hated trust me. I have hung out with a few girls tho and hated it. I felt they put me in not so safe situations with not so safe people. That, of course was just my experience and you might meet the bestie of your life there, who knows.

    Since then though, I keep almost completely to myself. I found that the more girls think they're friends with you, the more they ask to borrow EVERYTHING and ask for a ride EVERY DAY. They'll probably just use you. Even if you do make friends there, it's still a job and you shouldn't hang all over each other. I've definitely done that. And when I left with 50 bucks, I really regretted it.

    And I've deffffinitely noticed that those party friend girls will sit in a group, smoking, watching the stage, refusing to talk to anyone over 25. And when they are talking to some douchey young guys, they'll sit there for 2 hours, ask for no dances/tips, and leave owing the club tipout while the guys leave with their real name and number. SOOO glad I cut them out asap! I make so much more and am a lot happier.

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