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Thread: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

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    Default Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    Here’s my situation…
    When I hustle, I normally spend 1-3 minutes per customer. Sometimes I encounter guys who seem interested and they start to feel on my butt. I always move and ask them if they would like a dance. Most guys do; but those who don’t will generally hand me a dollar and say no thanks. I get so annoyed I tell them if you don’t want a dance then don’t fucking touch my ass. I then take their petty ass dollar and drop it on the floor like it’s nothing (because to me it’s nothing). I feel like it may teach them that being inside a strip club doesn’t make it a $1 all you can touch ass buffet. I refuse to entertain that behavior by smiling and walking away. Oh the nerves of these fuckers. I’m worth a lot more than that bitch.
    I’m interested in how you girls feel when guys start touching you with no intentions of buying lap dances. How do you handle it? Does it piss you off too or am I over reacting?


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    God/dess simone87's Avatar
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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    i once had this little indian guy say he would get a champagne room, and while i was sitting on his lap try and grope me all over. i did get angry, moved to my seat and told him " you can't do that on the floor. now if you'd like to have some fun with me, we can go into the champagne room now" he said he'd go get money, and then never came back. some guys just want a quick grope for free, just like some want to come in, sit in the back and see naked girls on the stage for free. its pathetic really. groping on the floor is not ok at my club, even if they want to buy a dance so a lot of times i've seen the guys get thrown out, always makes me warm and fuzzy inside
    no you aren't over-reacting, it pisses me off too

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    If people touched me, I would charge them $5. I tell them all cutesy that there's no touching and it was their fine. If they said they were broke or not getting dances, I'd tell them to respect the dancers or get their broke ass out of the club. Laugh at them for being broke and perving (sometimes 'bump' into their drink to spill it on them), then tell every manager and bouncer to watch him because he's handsy. (That part might not work for you since you're in NY) He would get tired of being stared down and leave usually. If the douche was in a group, I was loud enough that one of his friends would feel bad or embarrassed by the douche's behavior and either tip me or get dances. The regulars learned to not touch me because I charged them more. I knew they had money and wouldn't leave until they paid their stupidity fee. Perks of being in a tiny dive I guess.

    That being said, tossing their dollar on the floor and walking away won't teach them a thing. All they are thinking is, "Ooo. I got my dollar back."

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    1.jpgThis is the wrong business to be in if you're paranpid about being touched or more. It's never not going to happen. It's kinda like deal with it and get over it. More important things to worry about.

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    @jadenicole
    Nobody is worried about being touched. The problem is guys trying to grope us for with zero intentions of getting dances. Sounds like you entertain that behavior. Good for you!

    Read and understand the post before commenting next time.


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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    As soon as someone tries to feel me up on the floor, I immediately try to close the sale, usually with something along the lines of, "I can tell you're ready to have some fun! Let's take this somewhere more private." If they bite, great. If not, I'm up and out of there. Simone is right that many guys come in just to try and grope or hang with the dancers for free, so extricate yourself as soon as that's clear. While it's definitely annoying, try not to let it put a damper on your mood because that can mess with your hustle when you finally encounter potential spenders.

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    2.jpgI dont entertain it. I just don't worry about it. Go with the flow!

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    Quote Originally Posted by shanna dior View Post
    As soon as someone tries to feel me up on the floor, I immediately try to close the sale, usually with something along the lines of, "I can tell you're ready to have some fun! Let's take this somewhere more private." If they bite, great. If not, I'm up and out of there. Simone is right that many guys come in just to try and grope or hang with the dancers for free, so extricate yourself as soon as that's clear. While it's definitely annoying, try not to let it put a damper on your mood because that can mess with your hustle when you finally encounter potential spenders.
    Thankfully it doesn't put a damper on my mood. I normally just continue my hustling. I do it to make the guys think twice before doing it again.

    I really like your "I can tell you're ready for some fun" line. Def will keep it I'm mind for next time.
    Last edited by kassie; 02-04-2014 at 07:27 AM.

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    A couple times this pissed me off so much I tore up the $1 they gave me & scattered the pieces all over. They would be so disrespectful in giving me their measly $1 that it just made me sick to my stomach to even think of taking it, but I certainly was not going to let them have it back. These guys are up there w/ the pricks who try to be slick by sticking bills inside your bra or undies so they can cop a feel. Guys who did that to me got scratched right off the bat.

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    Quote Originally Posted by shanna dior View Post
    As soon as someone tries to feel me up on the floor, I immediately try to close the sale, usually with something along the lines of, "I can tell you're ready to have some fun! Let's take this somewhere more private." If they bite, great. If not, I'm up and out of there. Simone is right that many guys come in just to try and grope or hang with the dancers for free, so extricate yourself as soon as that's clear. While it's definitely annoying, try not to let it put a damper on your mood because that can mess with your hustle when you finally encounter potential spenders.
    Agree with this! Someone once told me that the gropey guys are the guys that never spend money, but I have only found that to be half true. I've met some gropey guys who have turned out to be big spenders over the years so like Shanna said I just try and get them in there as quick as possible by saying something along the lines of what she mentioned.

    However I do find gropey-ness often = grabby in dances!

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    Quote Originally Posted by JadeNicole View Post
    1.jpgThis is the wrong business to be in if you're paranpid about being touched or more. It's never not going to happen. It's kinda like deal with it and get over it. More important things to worry about.
    Uhhhhh she's not paranoid, she's saying she's pissed that they think they are entitled to touch her. Frankly, just because we're strippers doesn't mean we want to be touched by gross men (there are probably a LOT of ladies who will say they wish it would go back to the days of air dances being standard), and it doesn't mean we have to allow it. It's fucking rude to touch a stranger, be she a stripper or a civilian, never mind grabbing their ass.

    Also, why do you keep posting pictures of yourself in each post?
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

    "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."


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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    IMO.. there are other things to worry about. Much of it is accidental contact when it happens to me. It's not as important FOR ME as hustling and trying to get upstairs in VIP as much as possible.

    PROMOTION!

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    I agree with Shana Dior ill just make a hustle out of it and if the bait doesn't bite then i'll walk away because your always going to come in contact with wandering hands,yes i agree that just because were strippers doesn't mean that your entitled to grope on us especially for free!! But hey thats how it is nowadays you just got to try and make the best out of the situation even if its an annoying situation to be in.

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    ^^^^well said!

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    Well, this happens to me at work and in public and I'm never okay with it. It's not the end of the world but I don't care to just let it slide either. I don't act mean or angry or physical at first, because that usually just opens the door for a guy to make fun of me and say bullshit like "You're so cute when you're angry". Instead I usually get at eye level with him and say in my grown up voice, "Please don't touch me without permission. When I am touched against my will I feel disrespected and violated and then nobody has any fun.". Obviously what I say to a guy in public is a little more aggressive but still the same message of "when you do this I feel bad and I do not want to feel bad". I have ALWAYS gotten an apology (and sometimes some money) after saying that.

    When reading this thread I realized I could turn it into a hustle, and then AFTER the guy has paid for the dances/CR/whatever and it's all done, I could give the little speech about treating other people right.

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    I just catch their hand before it gets to my butt, move it to my waist and hold it there. I say "want a lap dance?" or something like that, keeping their hand on my waist and blocking my butt. If they refuse I take their hand in mine and back away not giving them another opportunity to grab me. It sounds awkward but after doing it millions of times it's second nature.

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    took their hand off and said the big guy over there is my boyfreind he would not like that...lets go privent.....

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    hands off, firm/fair & let's get a dance, let's go *private

    Yes I like the last two answers, just keep a cool head, be firm and protect yourself. Like begets like. If you focus on the bad energy of them doing that, it just brings more of the same energy concentrated on that thought.

    Better to block it/change it, than give in or react with too much of your own personal feelings. I'm thinking of all these times I took it way more personal and then the times I was better equipped and think I handled it "well" was when I had all my shit together and was spot on. The bad times I may have been PMSing hard, drunk, low blood sugar, or something like that and it flipped me the wrong way. Self-control is a big issue for many women I've known. For me the problem has never been losing my temper, I probably should lose my temper more. For me the problem is more of an endemic not-saying-something-and-just-taking-it. I would internalize a weird message each time a guy touches and doesn't buy, each time you let a guy get away with it just trying to "la la la it's fine move on to next guy" tell yourself it's all good. I don't know where I'm going with this. I want to be strong and firm and impersonal, not let it wreck my mood and hustle but not ever take away the message or feeling of yuck from it.
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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    We are not human to these people. We are a commodity to be purchased. Not all strip club customers feel this way, but a fair share of them are absolutely objectifying us. I get it. I'm no more human to them than a cartoon character. We are the fantasy. In some customer's minds, the fantasy likes to be groped for free.

    I don't bother with trying to teach them a moral lesson. I'll use some cheesy line about how I'm a collector and would like to know if they would like to contribute to my collection. When they ask what I collect, I reply with "Currency. Especially bills with double and triple digits."

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    Gropey customers get an immediate sales pitch from me, and a demand for a tip. If they have money on the table and won't buy a dance or tip me, I take a few bills and find a new customer to sit with. If they do get a dance and try to grope me, I make it as shitty a dance as possible, charge them extra and won't do another. I won't dance for anyone who does not treat me with absolute respect. I treat myself like a goddess and find that customers can sense that. Most guys are respectful. I don't deal with gropey customers, neither should anyone else. They should be ignored by everyone in the club.

    That being said, it's nothing to get mad over. You can't control someone elses' obviously poor upbringing and tastelessness. Only pity them and forget about them and be the goddess you are. Not worth thinking about otherwise

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    At least you got a tip, most of these losers assumed dancers were there for their usually free entertainment. I hated it and when they tried to touch I would tell them no. One guy got insistent and then grabbed by butt, and I punched him. He eventually got kicked out.

    And no, being a dancer doesn't mean customers have the right to touch. I do not like strange men touching me

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    For some reason my ass is unnaturally cold. Some jerkoff tried to grab it tonight and recoiled. He fell off the bar stool freaked out. "OMG she's as cold as a dead body!" "Do you spend a lot of time groping dead people's asses?" I asked. No reply.
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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    I try to close the sale asap and usually they are there for a free feel. Pisses me off for a few minutes then I try to move on and not let it ruin my night.

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    I hate it. I either push them hard for extra tips or I flat-out say 'no' in a flirty tone. GrabbyMcGrabbers always ask why too! When I respond with ' because I say so,' they knock it off. Weird but works for me.

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    Default Re: Guys touching your ass and not getting dances.

    Lol at fizzy ...

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