Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 33

Thread: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    114
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked 158 Times in 60 Posts

    Default How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    First off, let me say I've enjoyed reading the threads here, it's helped me catch up on the SC life - and get the dancers' perspective. Background - going to be 40 in a year+, divorced, professional, and two great kids who take up all of my free time at home, when I'm not working (we share custody). I go to SC's on business/travel. No illusions here - I get it's a job first, and foremost. There is no white knight here, or a "fun" guy a dancer is supposed to choose over a guy who pays, or the good looking guy over the guy who pays. I'm the guy who pays for play. So, I had my annual guys trip this past month - and I'm still baffled by it. Again, no illusions, but what I'm really asking is - how far will dancers go with their own personal story truth-wise, and even pass up some $ to try and get us to buy the fantasy?

    Anyways, on the trip, at one club I meet the dancer who is exactly my crush appearance-wise. She's obviously very successful (she made a ton of tips on the stage, and 3-4 guys asking her to go to VIP after I met her - more on that in a minute) - out-of-town freelance regular. I have a spectacular time in VIP, with contact, but nothing you'd consider extras. But hands-down, the best LD skills I've ever experienced, even without extras - she was spectacular. Now, I realize it's part of the act, but she seems to enjoy herself too, especially as she realizes I'm not going to dry hump her or go out of bounds, but really desire her. During this time, of course, she tells me more & more of her life - nothing too crazy, kid, divorced, family close-by, etc. - all of which I figure could be true, or could be entirely made up - but that's her right. I ask & get to give her more contact, as I enjoy that almost as much as receiving, after 2-3 dances, as she tells me "you've earned my trust, I feel safe" - 9-10 dances in all. All in all, an amazing, physically incredible time.

    Anyways, next night, I decide I have to try and relive that night one more time - when I get there, I walk up to her just before she hits the stage, and she comes to me right after for some more VIP time. So here's where it gets weird - we have another awesome time in VIP, at least 7-8 dances. And there's a lot of mutual action going on, but again staying away from full extras. And then, as things get really hot, she stops me, and says - "I have to stop, this is too intense". Not telling me to stop what I'm doing - but she stops the VIP experience (she needs a break, literally). But, 2 hrs later, with 30 mins to go b4 closing, I asked her if she was game for VIP one last time (and of course, she said yes). And again, it was intense, amazing, and mind-blowing. Knowing I'm her last custy, she really kind of cuts loose. At the end, I do NOT ask for her FB/BBM/cell, because, well, I don't think I'm ever coming back. She gives me a great kiss (on the cheek, now that the lights are on), and says "you are such a good man" - and then tells me where she normally works, and what days. I blow it off because I think it's not going to happen again, since I'm never coming back. Then I find out a week later we have 2 annual business trips now planned at her city, out of the blue. So, I go check out the info she gave me, and through the club site indirect link I get her FB page - which actually confirms everything down to the T that she told me. So now I sit, completely baffled.

    Again, I know it's a job, first, and frankly, I wouldn't get the interest if I wasn't paying first of all. And I understand what I'm feeling now isn't love, it's desire fuelled by two incredible nights of pay-for-play. I get that. What I don't get are 2-3 things, and I figure it would be better to hear it from the dancers than from other guys:

    1. How much personal info do dancers normally give away? Is it normal for *really* personal information to be given away to anyone who pays? Or is this unusual?
    2. Why would any dancer stop a sure thing as an ongoing VIP? That totally goes against the $-first principle...

    Those are the 2 questions I can't figure out - any help here? Because I made it so clear I wasn't coming back (because I really didn't think I would), I don't see any type of long game being played here. The other practical question - now that I am going back for at least an annual visit - I'd love to contact her, again only for ITC business - I'm not saving anyone, this is work for her, and my life is complicated enough - but if I can get a shot to relive those 2 nights, hands-down I'm taking it. Because I didn't ask for her cell/FB/BBM, I really don't want to invade her privacy. I'm sorry if I sound like every other story told here, but I consider myself a level-headed guy who knows the score - my head tells me this wasn't that different, but the 2 questions keep me thinking there's a small difference. I appreciate the views from those who've been on the other side, and will listen to your input, even if it's not what I might want to hear.
    Last edited by gocanucks; 02-17-2014 at 12:38 AM.

  2. #2
    Moderator yoda57us's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2002
    Location
    at the Y
    Posts
    10,035
    Thanks
    2,878
    Thanked 5,834 Times in 2,332 Posts
    My Mood
    Goofy

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Dude, no one is going to read this...
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

  3. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to yoda57us For This Useful Post:


  4. #3
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    114
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked 158 Times in 60 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    Dude, no one is going to read this...
    Doh - just read it myself - gotta remember to filter/summarize next time - cut out the rambling (well as much rambling as I could LOL). OK, fair enough.

    Simplify the Q's to the 2 in the last paragraphs then:

    1. How much personal info do dancers normally give away? Is it normal for *really* personal information to be given away truthfully to anyone who pays?
    2. Why would any dancer stop a sure thing as an ongoing VIP if the rules they set aren't being broken? That totally goes against the $-first principle...

    If anyone wants to really read the rest, great. But I kinda see your point. :lol:
    Last edited by gocanucks; 02-16-2014 at 10:56 PM.

  5. #4
    Featured Member JoJoX's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    1,698
    Thanks
    1,351
    Thanked 4,248 Times in 1,017 Posts
    My Mood
    Psychedelic

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    Dude, no one is going to read this...
    LOL, I clicked on this link and saw how long it was, then said "Fuck this shit..." and your reply caught my eye hahaha.

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to JoJoX For This Useful Post:


  7. #5
    Featured Member JoJoX's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    1,698
    Thanks
    1,351
    Thanked 4,248 Times in 1,017 Posts
    My Mood
    Psychedelic

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Didn't read it but my guess is this- you're over analyzing... what happened to having a good time at the strip club and leaving it at that?

  8. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to JoJoX For This Useful Post:


  9. #6
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    114
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked 158 Times in 60 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by JoJoX View Post
    Didn't read it but my guess is this- you're over analyzing... what happened to having a good time at the strip club and leaving it at that?
    I don't blame you for not reading the OP. Cut over half of it.

    That might be the simplest answer. I just have never had a dancer stop VIP action (and I wasn't breaking any rules she didn't allow to be broken <as I always ask>). I also was under the impression most dancers aren't comfortable in giving out real info, but wondered if that's more of a myth than true. I appreciate the input.

  10. #7
    Banned Aniela's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2009
    Location
    KW
    Posts
    3,291
    Thanks
    6,920
    Thanked 5,854 Times in 2,242 Posts
    My Mood
    Cynical

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by gocanucks View Post
    No illusions here - I get it's a job first, and foremost, dancers need $ to pay the bills.
    Quote Originally Posted by gocanucks View Post
    Again, no illusions - I realize it's all about selling the experience and fantasy - but what I'm really asking is - how far will dancers go with their own personal story truth-wise, and even pass up some $ to try and get us to buy the fantasy?
    It is good that you have no illusions abt the fact that a dancer's job is to sell the illusion of attainability. That said, a dancer can talk your ear off abt 'their own personal story', but how much truth is in it will vary. Sm have no fucks to give abt spilling all; many will mix true facts abt themselves w/ a backstory that is part of building the illusion you are paying them to create for you. Customer interaction is sm times a bit like writing a movie. The customer (usually) knows to 'suspend sm disbelief' but the dancer cannot get *too* carried away, lest she become less believable & thus less relatable.

    Quote Originally Posted by gocanucks View Post
    Now, I realize it's part of the act, but she seems to enjoy herself too, especially as she realizes I'm not going to dry hump her or go out of bounds, but really desire her. During this time, of course, she tells me more & more of her life - nothing too crazy, kid, divorced, family close-by, etc. - all of which I figure could be true, or could be entirely made up - but that's her right .... I realize it's probably a sell job, but I don't really care.
    Of course you care, or else you would not have posted Any dancer is going to enjoy her time w/ you much more when you behave & are actually there for the company/services she provides, rather than trying to force yourself on her. It is not impossible to have an experience w/ a dancer that is mutually enjoyable, even if the two parties find their enjoyment in different aspects of their time together.

    Quote Originally Posted by gocanucks View Post
    Then I find out a week later we have 2 annual business trips now planned at her city, out of the blue. So, I go check out the info she gave me, and through the club I get her FB page - which actually confirms everything down to the T that she told me
    .

    See the third highlight above. You have already answered your own question: however much she actually likes you beyond your mutually enjoyed previous experience, it was a sell job. In my vanilla office the head of sales has a sign on her desk w/ a quote abt how trust is the glue that binds the sales relationship together. She would have been a fool to lie abt things in an effort to have you come back that you could easily verify, b/c naturally your belief in her (& by extension the product she is selling) would be shot.



    Quote Originally Posted by gocanucks View Post
    1. How much personal info do dancers normally give away? Is it normal for *really* personal information to be given away to anyone who pays? Or is this unusual?
    2. Why would any dancer stop a sure thing as an ongoing VIP? That totally goes against the $-first principle...
    1) YMMV. No dancer who gives a hoot for her own safety will let slip personal info that can lead directly to her. There are sm sick ppl out there that will take anything they can get to look a girl up. Barring that, maybe she really is divorced & has a kid, maybe one or the other, maybe neither. She may have crafted her persona around what she thinks the typical SC patron thinks of most dancers. Then again, I have commiserated w/ certain customers who experienced tough breakups that were similar to mine, for example, or we discussed alcoholism b/c it ran in both our families -- these are very personal things abt myself that were genuine but revealed w/ a purpose in mind, building toward that $AŁE.
    2) I have stopped VIPs when I felt my safety or comfort might be in question. Just saying. I don't know your dancer & altho I may have an idea, I don't really know what you guys were up to in there, or what is considered acceptable conduct in her club. Maybe she stopped b/c she was walking a thin line & wanted to dial it back b4 you guys got caught. She could have also employed the break as another sales tactic.

  11. #8
    Featured Member JoJoX's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    1,698
    Thanks
    1,351
    Thanked 4,248 Times in 1,017 Posts
    My Mood
    Psychedelic

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by gocanucks View Post
    I don't blame you for not reading the OP. Cut over half of it.

    That might be the simplest answer. I just have never had a dancer stop VIP action (and I wasn't breaking any rules she didn't allow to be broken <as I always ask>). I also was under the impression most dancers aren't comfortable in giving out real info, but wondered if that's more of a myth than true. I appreciate the input.
    I would not worry about it and just get a new favorite...pretty sure she's not thinking about you ATM. It's her loss- besides, maybe the reason had nothing to do with what you did- you just never know! It's a business, nothing should be taken personal. Most dancers give out their personal information if they think it will benefit them financially.

  12. #9
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    114
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked 158 Times in 60 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by Aniela View Post
    It is good that you have no illusions abt the fact that a dancer's job is to sell the illusion of attainability. That said, a dancer can talk your ear off abt 'their own personal story', but how much truth is in it will vary. Sm have no fucks to give abt spilling all; many will mix true facts abt themselves w/ a backstory that is part of building the illusion you are paying them to create for you. Customer interaction is sm times a bit like writing a movie. The customer (usually) knows to 'suspend sm disbelief' but the dancer cannot get *too* carried away, lest she become less believable & thus less relatable.
    First off, thanks for providing very honest and thoughtful feedback. I do appreciate it very much.


    Of course you care, or else you would not have posted Any dancer is going to enjoy her time w/ you much more when you behave & are actually there for the company/services she provides, rather than trying to force yourself on her. It is not impossible to have an experience w/ a dancer that is mutually enjoyable, even if the two parties find their enjoyment in different aspects of their time together.
    Thanks, that's really all I wanted to hear - I realize getting paid is the #1 motivation, and everyone sells themselves as adventurous so we buy into the fantasy, but there is no doubt if even a small connection is made (she enjoys the attention/desire that is very genuine on my part), it intensifies the experience.

    .

    See the third highlight above. You have already answered your own question: however much she actually likes you beyond your mutually enjoyed previous experience, it was a sell job. In my vanilla office the head of sales has a sign on her desk w/ a quote abt how trust is the glue that binds the sales relationship together. She would have been a fool to lie abt things in an effort to have you come back that you could easily verify, b/c naturally your belief in her (& by extension the product she is selling) would be shot.
    This is where things get a bit trickier - I don't think her FB was ever intended to be linked - there was a promotion for an event that her friend posted on a site, and that indirectly led to the FB page - I honestly only wanted to find her to figure out a way to confirm her schedule before I go back - but I don't want to invade her privacy (yes, I realize I indirectly did, but it was an honest mistake). Again, I've had direct FB/BBM/cell info given by other dancers b4 - here, though, it's not a given she would have given it to me - because I didn't ask. It's also why I'm uncertain about approaching her via FB - if FB is her private non-SC life, that's her right. If her friend F'd up, I don't want to be the bad guy and destroy her feeling of security / separation of lives.


    1) YMMV. No dancer who gives a hoot for her own safety will let slip personal info that can lead directly to her. There are sm sick ppl out there that will take anything they can get to look a girl up. Barring that, maybe she really is divorced & has a kid, maybe one or the other, maybe neither. She may have crafted her persona around what she thinks the typical SC patron thinks of most dancers. Then again, I have commiserated w/ certain customers who experienced tough breakups that were similar to mine, for example, or we discussed alcoholism b/c it ran in both our families -- these are very personal things abt myself that were genuine but revealed w/ a purpose in mind, building toward that $AŁE.
    See above.

    2) I have stopped VIPs when I felt my safety or comfort might be in question. Just saying. I don't know your dancer & altho I may have an idea, I don't really know what you guys were up to in there, or what is considered acceptable conduct in her club. Maybe she stopped b/c she was walking a thin line & wanted to dial it back b4 you guys got caught. She could have also employed the break as another sales tactic.
    Fair enough. I thought about the sales tactic, but she knew that I was likely leaving soon, and this was my last night. She was genuinely surprised when I was still around later on. But I do take the point even if she seemed to be enjoying things, enjoying and being comfortable aren't always the same.


    Again, many thanks. I needed to hear a balanced but dancer-based perspective. You have my eternal gratitude.

  13. #10
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    114
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked 158 Times in 60 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by JoJoX View Post
    I would not worry about it and just get a new favorite...pretty sure she's not thinking about you ATM. It's her loss- besides, maybe the reason had nothing to do with what you did- you just never know! It's a business, nothing should be taken personal. Most dancers give out their personal information if they think it will benefit them financially.
    Thanks for the very honest feedback. I have zero illusions that she's thinking about me either LOL. I only get out 2-3x a year and I travel to different cities, and if I know I can get a mind-blowing, intense experience in that one when I'm there, I'll do it hands-down each time.

    I appreciate your honesty, as I realize it's far more likely your answer represents the bottom line. Thanks!

  14. The Following User Says Thank You to gocanucks For This Useful Post:


  15. #11
    God/dess whirlerz's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2004
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    27,134
    Thanks
    55,898
    Thanked 26,028 Times in 13,271 Posts
    Blog Entries
    1
    My Mood
    Aggressive

    Mind Blowing Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    Dude, no one is going to read this...
    Right! I blanked out the minute I saw the long-ass paragraph, I'm guessing it's another, "Does she really like me"? sorta thread that we've had a few of..


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

  16. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to whirlerz For This Useful Post:


  17. #12
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Hamburg, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    10,607
    Thanks
    2,705
    Thanked 13,685 Times in 4,414 Posts
    Blog Entries
    5
    My Mood
    In Love

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    I'll tell you whatever you want until the money runs out. I'll tell you my boobs are real.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

  18. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to tempest666 For This Useful Post:


  19. #13
    Banned
    Joined
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Vegas, Baby!
    Posts
    2,136
    Thanks
    2,464
    Thanked 1,174 Times in 619 Posts
    My Mood
    Fine

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    *shrug* - I'm going to differ here.

    99% of the time, it's "stripper shit". 99% of the time, it's a great show and a fantasy. 99% of the time, everything everyone's saying here is true. More than 99%, actually.

    Sometimes, the girl likes you, an will "let you in" a little. *IF* that's the case here - proceed with caution, but DO proceed.

    Call me crazy for saying this on SW, but this one might be a little different than most we've read. Or maybe I just see it that way because his story sounds VERY familiar - and we've been together 5 years & I'm married to her now. :p

  20. #14
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Jul 2013
    Location
    SF Bay Area
    Posts
    334
    Thanks
    19
    Thanked 253 Times in 137 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by Almost Jaded View Post
    Call me crazy for saying this on SW, but this one might be a little different than most we've read. Or maybe I just see it that way because his story sounds VERY familiar - and we've been together 5 years & I'm married to her now. :p
    That's a good counterpoint -- or maybe, the exception that proves the rule. I've dated a few strippers and ended up friends-with-benefits with a few more, and there have been stories from both blues and pinks about stripper/customer dating (although I note many pinks finish their story with "...and I'll never do that again" ). The thing is, in my experience, someone motivated to write nearly a full screen of breathless overanalysis, in 100% of cases, is beyond smitten and not thinking straight. And no matter how many times the storyteller stops to tell us that he understands what's going on and it's all ok, if that were true there wouldn't have been a screenful of story. So, gocanucks, I truly think the important thing for you is to do a gut check on what you really feel here. Almost Jaded is right, maybe this is the 1-in-1000 case where it's different, but we can't tell. Certainly, there's nothing in your story that makes me think that yet. For example, I have no idea why she stopped the VIP ... it could be because she was getting so hot from you that she needed to stop, or it could be that she knew she needed to change her tampon and she gave you a reason to stop the dance that would get you even more intrigued and hooked, or maybe she knew her bf would be texting her around this time ... up to you as to the likely scenarios. None of which implies she didn't like you as a customer, of course. In my own experience, in all cases where I ended up in a deeper relationship past customer/stripper, our interactions pretty quickly moved to contexts where I didn't pay her for her time.

  21. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Radius For This Useful Post:


  22. #15
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    114
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked 158 Times in 60 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by Almost Jaded View Post
    *shrug* - I'm going to differ here.

    99% of the time, it's "stripper shit". 99% of the time, it's a great show and a fantasy. 99% of the time, everything everyone's saying here is true. More than 99%, actually.

    Sometimes, the girl likes you, an will "let you in" a little. *IF* that's the case here - proceed with caution, but DO proceed.

    Call me crazy for saying this on SW, but this one might be a little different than most we've read. Or maybe I just see it that way because his story sounds VERY familiar - and we've been together 5 years & I'm married to her now. :p
    Thanks for the input - honestly I'd be shocked if it was as your case was - yours really is the exception that proves the rule. I think it's equally as likely she just had a good time with a customer, and there was nothing lost by saying what she did and finishing the night as she did, since I wasn't expected to come back. I am glad to hear though that once in a while, there is some real goodness that happens. I hope this is something you tell your grandchildren...well maybe not everything unless our society changes drastically, LOL.


    Quote Originally Posted by Radius View Post
    That's a good counterpoint -- or maybe, the exception that proves the rule. I've dated a few strippers and ended up friends-with-benefits with a few more, and there have been stories from both blues and pinks about stripper/customer dating (although I note many pinks finish their story with "...and I'll never do that again" ). The thing is, in my experience, someone motivated to write nearly a full screen of breathless overanalysis, in 100% of cases, is beyond smitten and not thinking straight. And no matter how many times the storyteller stops to tell us that he understands what's going on and it's all ok, if that were true there wouldn't have been a screenful of story. So, gocanucks, I truly think the important thing for you is to do a gut check on what you really feel here. Almost Jaded is right, maybe this is the 1-in-1000 case where it's different, but we can't tell. Certainly, there's nothing in your story that makes me think that yet. For example, I have no idea why she stopped the VIP ... it could be because she was getting so hot from you that she needed to stop, or it could be that she knew she needed to change her tampon and she gave you a reason to stop the dance that would get you even more intrigued and hooked, or maybe she knew her bf would be texting her around this time ... up to you as to the likely scenarios. None of which implies she didn't like you as a customer, of course. In my own experience, in all cases where I ended up in a deeper relationship past customer/stripper, our interactions pretty quickly moved to contexts where I didn't pay her for her time.
    Thanks as well for the input. And yes, I'd admit my mind isn't quite right - I've been around long enough to realize it's my lust, combined with an intense experience, that has me reeling. Believe me, that's why I posted this, and I get that. But to be clear - I'm not looking for something as deep as Almost Jaded / you are referring to. Work & kids have made me a single dad, and with their stage in life, that's the way it's going to be - they need me more than anyone else. I'm not looking for Ms. Right - but I won't deny I would opt for the mind-blowing repeat of those nights again when I'm away. I guess I'm just trying to figure out why I'm still reeling - that's never happened before - I have a great time, I go back home, and I put it away like a great scrapbook memory. This is the same, except I'm still getting that euphoric memory every now & then, and so I'm just trying to figure out why it's still there - and I realize it's all on my end. Just trying to figure out why it's different this time.

    I totally get it's pay for play here - trust me, I have zero illusions here. I also know that when I treat dancers with respect, follow their rules, and still make them feel very desired and appreciated (and MOST of all - keep the $ coming), there's been a lot more to the experience, and part of that seems to be because it works better for me when the dancer looks like she's enjoying herself (again, realizing she's there for the $, but is having some fun at work while getting paid, the ideal combo) - I just haven't run into anything remotely like that, well, ever. Maybe she enjoyed herself, maybe she realized I like it when the dancer is enjoying herself. I guess in the end it doesn't really matter except to my ego - I'm just trying to figure out why my head still isn't straight. I'm coming to the realization it's because I had a bucket-list moment - and yes, a small part of me hopes it was even a little bit genuine on her part, even if it's 1-2 percent enjoyment and 98 percent work/$$.

    Believe me, as someone who's had LD's, extras, and who's really had non-extra great times, and having been to many different places, I understand that it's a job first, and it's the $ . It's just that if it was even just a little bit genuine, then I'd do it again in a heartbeat the next time I'm there (realizing the most genuine part is the $ to do it again). Of course, even it's not genuine, then I'd probably still do it again (who am I kidding, LOL - at least I have insight there), but I'd also prevent making an ass out of myself in reading any wrong signs. I've always understood it's business, so just trying to make sure I'm not reading anything more into this.

    Thanks again - really do appreciate the honest feedback.

    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    I'll tell you whatever you want until the money runs out. I'll tell you my boobs are real.
    Thanks for the direct but funny feedback. I did LOL.
    Last edited by gocanucks; 02-17-2014 at 09:35 AM.

  23. #16
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Jul 2013
    Location
    SF Bay Area
    Posts
    334
    Thanks
    19
    Thanked 253 Times in 137 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Heh, you'll definitely do it again. You had fun, why not? I'd just follow the guideline that, even if you're a rocket scientist and she hasn't finished high school, at this particular game, she's waaaay smarter than you, her emotional IQ at this dwarfs yours (and mine). If you couldn't think of the hypothetical less-romantic reasons I cited as examples for her to stop the VIPs, and could only come to the conclusion that she must have been telling you the truth about having gotten so hot and bothered, you may be a bit smitten If you're paying, it's stripper/customer (which is fine! as long as you're clear-eyed about that)

  24. The Following User Says Thank You to Radius For This Useful Post:


  25. #17
    Moderator yoda57us's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2002
    Location
    at the Y
    Posts
    10,035
    Thanks
    2,878
    Thanked 5,834 Times in 2,332 Posts
    My Mood
    Goofy

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    As a guy who dates dancers and has maintained some long term friendships with a few girls OTC for as long as 15 or 20 years I would be a hypocrite if I said it never happens. What I will say with the all honesty is that it does not happen the first time you go into a club to send money on a new dancer. All she was enamored with that night was your wallet.

    You also need to face the very good possibility that when you go back next year she will be long gone...

    Good luck, keep your eyes open.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

  26. The Following User Says Thank You to yoda57us For This Useful Post:


  27. #18
    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2009
    Location
    London
    Posts
    3,542
    Thanks
    1,043
    Thanked 3,893 Times in 1,568 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    For me it really depends on the customer. Some customers obviously just want a fantasy in which case I give them a fantasy. I'm always trying to make connections with the customer-- you're Canadian? oh I'm Canadian too! I moved to the USA when I was 7 (my dad is Canadian I've never lived there for longer than a few months)-- and I'm not going to outright lie because I don't want to get caught, but I sure as hell fudge the truth a lot.

    If a customer really wants a real experience I'm pretty open. A lot of dancers I work with are very closed off about personal details and just lie about absolutely everything but it doesn't really bother me to be honest. I lie about certain things, like where I live specifically and stuff like that for safety reasons, but other than that I don't have a problem opening up. However, that's just not what customers want most of the time. Customers like fake. I was dancing with this girl on Saturday and she was doing this ridiculous, over the top heavy breathing and I wanted to burst into laughter because it was SO obvious to me that she obviously was not enjoying herself-- I mean everytime she turned away from the customer she had the most pissed off, annoyed expression on her face. But the customer was loving it and ended up spending his own money on some more double-dances with us after his bachelor party buddies cut him off.

    As far as the dating customer thing goes, it's never worked for me. Over the years I've met several customers that I've liked and wanted to see OTC, but it's always gone the same way... I text back and forth with them and they just end up being regulars, I can't make the jump. For me I can't date someone that's going to come into the club and this is going to sound really shitty, but usually the idea of giving up their money at work for a possible relationship doesn't sound worth it to me. The couple times I have seen someone outside it went awry, so I would rather just have them be friends that I occasionally text/speak with on the phone but only see when they come into the club. The problem with customers is that even as honest as I may be with them ITC, the relationship there is all about them. It's all about me meeting their needs, tailoring my speech/actions to what I know they want (and I'm good at my job so I know), not putting pressure on them, not bringing my own baggage and insecurities and relationships issues and complaints into the situation. When you take OTC I'm not going to be that way-- you're not paying me so I am going to call you and complain about my day or the fact that I feel ugly/fat or insecure about work. And with every customer that I've ever done that to I can see that once the haze of "OMG THE STRIPPER GAVE ME HER PHONE NUMBER AND SHE CALLED ME BACK" goes away, the fact that I'm a REAL person and not happy and confident all the time is SUCH a turn off, so I just revert back to work-mode and keep it professional and money-oriented. I've only ever gone out on a date with two customers and it was a one-time thing.

  28. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to audrey_k For This Useful Post:


  29. #19
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    114
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked 158 Times in 60 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Thanks everyone again for the added feedback. Yeah, I'm totally going back for sure - but with eyes wide open. Business first. From her FB page, it's pretty clear she's a regular dancer, so while anything can happen, availability-wise, I think there's no worries there. But first & foremost, still business. Just hope it can be mind-blowing the next time, p4p for sure.

    Audrey - thx for the very honest opinion. I get that I'm in the minority in that I prefer some form of mutual enjoyment than just my end (although let's be clear, just like dancers want the $, men always want their enjoyment first too). I don't need it to be 100 percent real, it's just way more fun if there's even some trace of genuine enjoyment - I've realized a couple of years ago after one experience with a totally hot dancer with zero interest to do anything but provide a service that for me, some mutual enjoyment is what makes the experience more fun...for me.

    Radius - as you pointed out, the best dancers probably pick up on my preference for mutual enjoyment after a while. I'm not talking the over-the-top examples - just simple things like a sigh. So yeah, either way, she either decided to let me think she was having a good time, or she actually was having a good time. I can live with either, even if my ego would love to believe it was Door B. Usually, the truth lies somewhere in between - but tilted heavily towards the business end. As you said - either way, I'm going back, LOL.

    Yoda - agree with everything you said. Appreciate you coming back a 2nd time to chime in.
    Last edited by gocanucks; 02-17-2014 at 12:03 PM.

  30. #20
    Banned
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Location
    Dallas, TX
    Posts
    53
    Thanks
    4
    Thanked 7 Times in 6 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Why didn't you ask her what happened previously?

  31. #21
    Banned
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    97
    Thanks
    76
    Thanked 45 Times in 19 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    If there were a way to settle the bet, I'd put a fiver on it she stopped the VIP cause she had to pinch a log.

    She's your favorite stripper not your Dentist or any shit. Even if you were FB friends and you had her full credit report, you should just hope for, but not expect, a repeat of your glorious evening with her. If you message her in FB, I'd guess there's a 2% chance you'll tromatize her, a 2% chance it will help you see her again, and a 96% chance she'll just ignore it.

  32. #22
    Featured Member
    Joined
    Nov 2012
    Posts
    980
    Thanks
    14
    Thanked 1,287 Times in 510 Posts
    My Mood
    Aggressive

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    sounds like you were super grabby in vip but she needed the money and pretended to go along with it but couldn't take it anymore and gave you a cute excuse to gtfo so she could try to get money out of you later. yes this is common with awful customers. no I've never left early if the guy was respectful.

    what do I lie about? anything and everything. making up new lies is one of the few ways I'm able to entertain myself while having the same conversations over and over.

    do I ever tell the truth or feel a genuine connection with someone? yes and it never involes dancing. only when we are sharing a couch, drinking, and talking.

  33. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to charlotte. For This Useful Post:


  34. #23
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    114
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked 158 Times in 60 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by ytqclys View Post
    If there were a way to settle the bet, I'd put a fiver on it she stopped the VIP cause she had to pinch a log.

    She's your favorite stripper not your Dentist or any shit. Even if you were FB friends and you had her full credit report, you should just hope for, but not expect, a repeat of your glorious evening with her. If you message her in FB, I'd guess there's a 2% chance you'll tromatize her, a 2% chance it will help you see her again, and a 96% chance she'll just ignore it.
    Thx - that helps re: FB. Since I didn't ask & get the FB directly, I'll save that for when I know I'm headed back. She likely won't remember me if it was all business, but if she does, great.

    Quote Originally Posted by charlotte. View Post
    sounds like you were super grabby in vip but she needed the money and pretended to go along with it but couldn't take it anymore and gave you a cute excuse to gtfo so she could try to get money out of you later. yes this is common with awful customers. no I've never left early if the guy was respectful.

    what do I lie about? anything and everything. making up new lies is one of the few ways I'm able to entertain myself while having the same conversations over and over.

    do I ever tell the truth or feel a genuine connection with someone? yes and it never involes dancing. only when we are sharing a couch, drinking, and talking.
    Thanks for the honesty. I thought about that - but 3 reasons why I didn't think it was the case:

    1. Bouncers stop by there every 4-5 dances, and the dancers give a signal - thumbs up all the time (more to check if I realize the tab, I'm sure).
    2. More importantly, she was very upfront about what was OK and wasn't - and the only times things went past was when I asked first, and she directly said "thank you for asking, and yes you can". She even commented "asking always gets you more". I'm there to enjoy myself, but as I said, I actually like it less if I get the vibe the dancer isn't into it.
    3. Finally, she closed the night with me 1 hour later, at the same time turning a guy who came up to her and asked (she saw me waiting off the stage as her stange dance finished, I nodded to VIP and she was walking over from the stage), even hearing him say to her "I've been waiting", and her saying "Really sorry". And, each day, while waiting for a drink pre-VIP, she asked to get her shit together after the stage before heading off to VIP, and had a huge stack of 20's along with her singles (I politely said "you're very popular " - and she said something to the effect "sometimes it's really great, sometimes it isn't - this has been a great weekend" - I know she wasn't referring to me, but she was in high demand). If I was being a POS, with her demand, I don't see why she'd come back, when other custies were asking for VIP.

    (Photographic memory, which doesn't help with being smitten - which I totally ackowledge is the case - and getting better now that I understand it better ).

    Believe me, I'd stop anything if it was bothering the dancer - I'm not into that at all. As for the truth parts - what you say makes total sense. The stuff she told me was during breaks (either before starting up, after drinks, and during a short 1-song we took in VIP to get her off her feet <she asked, I said yes>). From what you & the other dancers have told me, it seems part of the extent of trust / selling the experience - thx for being honest with your feedback.

  35. #24
    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2009
    Location
    London
    Posts
    3,542
    Thanks
    1,043
    Thanked 3,893 Times in 1,568 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by gocanucks View Post

    Audrey - thx for the very honest opinion. I get that I'm in the minority in that I prefer some form of mutual enjoyment than just my end (although let's be clear, just like dancers want the $, men always want their enjoyment first too). I don't need it to be 100 percent real, it's just way more fun if there's even some trace of genuine enjoyment - I've realized a couple of years ago after one experience with a totally hot dancer with zero interest to do anything but provide a service that for me, some mutual enjoyment is what makes the experience more fun...for me.
    Sometimes I enjoy being a customer and sometimes I don't. 90% of the time there's something about the customer that irks me, whether it's the fact that he's grabby, that he's asking me uncomfortable sexual questions, or that there's just off about him. Enjoyment is something that comes naturally and you can't expect it from someone, nor can it be boiled down to a "yes I enjoy dances" or "no I don't." What you can expect is that a dancer will act like she enjoys it.

  36. The Following User Says Thank You to audrey_k For This Useful Post:


  37. #25
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    114
    Thanks
    110
    Thanked 158 Times in 60 Posts

    Default Re: How often do dancers tell the whole truth / stop VIP?

    Quote Originally Posted by audrey_k View Post
    Sometimes I enjoy being a customer and sometimes I don't. 90% of the time there's something about the customer that irks me, whether it's the fact that he's grabby, that he's asking me uncomfortable sexual questions, or that there's just off about him. Enjoyment is something that comes naturally and you can't expect it from someone, nor can it be boiled down to a "yes I enjoy dances" or "no I don't." What you can expect is that a dancer will act like she enjoys it.
    Totally understood - which is why normally, either way, I don't think about it much, beyond that night, or weekend. In the end, I've found that if I'm considerate, follow their rules, and if I'm tempted to cross, I ask, then it's either yes/no (and if it's no, well damn, but that's the way it is), and no harm done, then it's fine. I also steer clear of the usual sex questions - I mean, what answer are you going to get in there - "I only like this"? I've learned that if I want some type of real interaction, then the real-life rules apply. You can't really have any type of real interaction and then go into Penthouse-Forum type talk, and expect that to be real - I get that. I just use honesty - what I like about them / they are doing, and what is working right there & now.

    Truly appreciate the input.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. When do you stop the VIP/CR?
    By Laurisa in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: 11-14-2010, 10:40 AM
  2. VIP-friendly Truth or Dare ideas
    By zombee in forum Hustle Hut
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 06-28-2010, 06:13 PM
  3. VIP rooms--tell me the truth:)
    By jadaminneapolis in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 29
    Last Post: 06-20-2009, 02:40 PM
  4. The Truth about The VIP Room is that...
    By trainfinder22 in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 52
    Last Post: 05-01-2006, 02:09 PM
  5. The Truth about The VIP Room is that...
    By trainfinder22 in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 01-31-2006, 11:52 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •