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Thread: Dealing with lonely

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    Featured Member Staples's Avatar
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    Default Dealing with lonely

    So, this may sound like something better suited for the lounge but I'm specifically speaking about camgirls.

    I moved to a new city just about the same time I started camming so I essentially lost my circle of friends. I have been unsuccessful in meeting other people and I'm wondering how others have dealt with this as a full time cam girl.

    I've thought about posting in Verified to see if there are other girls in my city I could meet for drinks but I don't know open to that other cam girls would be.
    Quote Originally Posted by Procrasturbator View Post
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    To be honest I think that's one of the hardest parts of this job... it's very isolating and the isolation it produces is rather... self-perpetuating. It sucks. When I first noticed this I had a kind of half-baked plan in my mind to volunteer somewhere a few days a week or take a class or something buuut of course I never went through with it. I always heard that it was hard to make friends as an adult but it's REALLY hard when you don't even work with anyone (in physical proximity), and even harder when you're starting over from scratch. I moved to a new city in October and I've yet to socialize with anyone new who doesn't try to a) fuck me or b) sell me drugs. Usually both but sometimes they want to exchange drugs for sex! ... Yeah.

    My point is that it can be hard to meet people when you're not naturally exposed to them through a job, school, social circle, etc.

    I'm not comfortable posting my real location out in CC (which is why I've never replied to those kinds of threads out here) but I'd be totally down for a verified thread


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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    Well I deal with it by going to meet up groups , and hiring male strippers/male escorts. it might change up a little when I decide to go to school that will be in September. but for the time being I like how I have a regular stripper/escort that comes to my house every couple of weeks.

    As for the meetup groups those are hard because they are just mostly women who are in very different places financially and professionally so finding a way I connect with them is extremely challenging, but I do the meetup thing so I can be out in a different space.

    I do connect with the local sex worker group in my city but that has its own challenges, meeting other works helps sometimes but I've always known making friends has never been easy for me. So I pretty much keep short social interactions to keep myself more or less sane.
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    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    I am so glad you posted this here because I don't read anything, anywhere but CC.

    It's completely okay to feel lonely at times. The older I get, I'm more comfortable by myself and enjoy the company of fewer people. This job can be very isolating so be sure to treat yourself well. It helps to just get out of the house once in awhile. Go shopping, get your nails did
    Quote Originally Posted by ~Carmen~ View Post
    I can see you being 90 and flipping your long hair, still teasing the boys.




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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    Yes it's tough, there are days when I make myself leave the house just for the sake of leaving the house. If it weren't for the gym, I could go a week without having to go anywhere else sometimes. And for many of us, it's tough to discuss this job with others. People just don't understand. Sometimes I hate that I have this job that I love and make great money and I can't really share it like others who have a vanilla job. Goes with the territory I guess!

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    I train dogs professionally and also have my own animals to care for. This is what makes me get out of the house everyday. If it wasn't for this, I could see myself as not leaving the house for 1-2 weeks at a time, when I'm in the 'cam mode' lol.

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    Moderator PhatGirlDynomite!!!'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    I've been wondering about this too. Starting a new job in a new city and state in a few months. I've always been around friends and family. You know people who know me. So it should be interesting. But honestly If camming were to be my only job once I make the transition I don't know how I would make new friends? It's gonna be a very interactive position where I will HAVE to work as a member of a team. My advice would be to get involved in the community. Where I am now volunteer and have met friends that way. Even though I've lived here for years I too feel isolated due to working from home and not wanting to get involved in the drug culture where I am. So mostly I keep to myself in my city. When I'm not traveling I spend most of my time with my family.

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    I fully understand where you're coming from. Minnie mentioned meetup.com which is good for getting out of the house. There are so many groups out there with everything you could imagine. They also have speed dating for friends in a few cities. Checking craigslist to see if you can find another camgirl or a stripper, etc and meet up with them for drinks or just putting an ad up yourself seeking a friend. You don't have to share your profession with everyone. I'm held up in my house but I don't plan on doing anything until my car goal is complete. Good luck, bb!




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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    Thank you for this thread. I have totally become a lonely hermit since camming. I have actually LOST friends after I started. When I told my best friend at the time (who I thought would be OK with it), she stopped talking to me and told me she didn't like what I did. Other friends pretended to be OK with it, but ended up talking shit about it behind my back. It was really heartbreaking. My boyfriend tells me to just not mention what I do, but that's not who I am. I don't like hiding things. Camming is a part of my life that I love, and I will not hide it.

    Thank goodness I have two dogs. They get me out of the house. A walk around the neighborhood forces me to talk to the neighbors and get some sunlight, lol. Like Procrasturbator, I have wanted to volunteer or take classes somewhere. I never have. I got the college catalog in the mail yesterday and I actually am very motivated to sign up for sign language or a WordPress class. I circled them and filled out the form. That's farther than Ive gotten before! lmao It's summer time, I want to meet some new people and get the fuck out of this house!!

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    Staples, I don't know Your personality, but just want to ask... Are You comfortable talking to random strangers when You are out running errands, etc? Example: in the line at the bank, supermarket, while at a park, coffee shop, mall, etc.?

    If so, I always find that's a great way to get things going. Maybe tell the person that you're new to the area, and do they have any suggestions on places to visit.
    I have the 'gift of gab', which comes naturally, so I can drum up convos with anyone. These days that's all the socialization and contact I need, because I am doing so many other things(career wise), that fill up my day. Plus, other health issues limit my social time.
    The meetup.com idea is a great one also. I used to belong to a few groups on there, and met some lovely people.
    Best of luck!
    Report back and tell us how it's going, ok?

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    I just remembered something else. Last year I got antsy from being at home all the time so I went and got a job at a sandwich shop. Minimum wage 15-20 hours a week. It was a popular hangout. I met a lot of interesting people working there. Good conversations. And my soup and sammies were FREE! It didnt even feel like a job because I liked being there and didnt need the money. I was just hanging out. That could be an idea for anyone who gets cabin fever.

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    If I recall, I'm a few hours away from you - but if you want to make the trek, you can definitely come hang out with me for a day or two!






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    Featured Member Staples's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    Thanks for the suggestions guys! Sabiah I can't remember where you are. I thought we were on opposite sides of the country for some reason.

    I've thought about the part time job and maybe that's exactly what I'll do!
    Quote Originally Posted by Procrasturbator View Post
    And keep at it. Get up, put on your make up, and sign on. With every second you're online comes the possibility of your next big spender. A customer could show up who will spend enough to make up for all the bad days and then some. You just have to be around for him and working multiple sites increases the chances of him finding you.


    ~No Love, All Hustle~

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    Consider yourself blessed! You don't need them in your life anyway. I've learned that you never lose friends, you just find out who your TRUE friends are.
    Quote Originally Posted by SpaceyLaceyButterfacey View Post
    Thank you for this thread. I have totally become a lonely hermit since camming. I have actually LOST friends after I started. When I told my best friend at the time (who I thought would be OK with it), she stopped talking to me and told me she didn't like what I did. Other friends pretended to be OK with it, but ended up talking shit about it behind my back. It was really heartbreaking. My boyfriend tells me to just not mention what I do, but that's not who I am. I don't like hiding things. Camming is a part of my life that I love, and I will not hide it.
    Quote Originally Posted by ~Carmen~ View Post
    I can see you being 90 and flipping your long hair, still teasing the boys.




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    Senior Member kittyangel's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    Yes!!! I feel you soo much! I got serious about camming after I moved out of state, away from my friends and family, and now that I cam full time and hardly ever have a reason to leave my apartment, I've been feeling super isolated. I've been forcing myself to go out and walk a few blocks every evening and it's really helped. I've been thinking about taking some classes too, since I'm pretty close to a community college.

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    I will be relocating, and this is a big worry of mine, too. Most of my friends live in different states and are all over the US at this point, with more moving out.

    I'm going to second what other people have said: a PT job just for getting out/meeting others (hard for me, because I cannot abide by shitty work environments, and my past few jobs were rather shitty), taking classes, meetup.com, volunteer, taking walks. I would say check out your local Michael's, Hobby Lobby, craft stores like those generally offer fun classes and you get to learn something new, dog park if you have pets, maybe a writer's group? After my divorce I would just go and take my laptop/books to the local coffee shop just so I could see and BE around other people and not feel so isolated. Book groups (check out paperbackswap.com, they have local reading groups all over the US). are another option, as well as your local library.
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    I don't any helpful advice at all.....but I did want to let you know that you aren't alone in your situation. *gentle hugs*

    I moved to a new city a while ago and I have literally gone months at a time not seeing anyone else other than those that I live with. And when I say 'not seeing anyone else' I mean not a single soul. Not a cashier, or barista or waitress.

    Because of my severe anxiety disorder I rarely leave my apartment alone.

    I used to have a social life before I moved away from all my friends but it has just seemed easier to focus on work all the time then to bother trying to build another social circle.

    I've made the joke on here about this before --- but this cartoon is pretty much a representation of my current life situation


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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    ^^^ Nice, the character is talking soo fast but i still get it haha!

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    I needed to resurect this topic. I feel so friendless. And I feel like it's so hard to make any good friends aswell. I tought about going to classes or something but for now i work my ass off for a special goal of mine. It's weird cause i live with my boyfriend and a good friend. We decided to introduce her to camming world to help her out (she was depressed because of having financial problems & more). Now she fighted with my boyfriend & evan tough i had nothing to do with anything, she barely talks with me aswell. She always does that (they are stubborn and fight about silly things all the time). The thing is, I moved out of my city & now i barely have any friends. I have like a grand total of 2 good friends. I am social, i do have some other girls i talk with ocassionally but they are not good friends.
    Sometimes i feel so lonely when it comes to friends. Do you girls deal with this? What do you think, should i try leaving my goal a little behind and try out some classes? or?
    Gosh, by the time years pass by i find it harder and harder to make good friends !

    I wrote evrything here because, since camming, I lost connection with friends. I feel like a weirdo that wants friends but is not able to socialise properly still.

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    ^ It s hard for me too, coz i m tired all the time and over stressed.
    I say "i dont care" I ll have time to make friends, but I can t do this job (and earn this money) forever.
    A lie to myself: i would like to have friends ofc.

    My boyfriends dudes come to visit us often. Usually i sleep - if I m awake, I'm too tired and stressed to say a word to them. Best would be to know another camgirl somehow, but i dont know a soul. :<

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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    Where are you from Lora? Let's be friends ! LOL . I know, it's hard to make friends from forums. Cause internet it's a creepy place. But I am that desperate ! hahaha

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  38. #22
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    From the last time I've posted, I've found the easiest way to get that social feeling is 'hobby groups'.

    It depends on the city you are moving too but I've noticed that most cities have 'hobby groups' where you mostly hang out and do an activity instead of having to completely pass by time with one-one-one talking. These kinds of groups include knitting groups, walking groups or even things like hula hooping or juggling groups.

    I've found that these types of groups work well for me since people don't tend to pry to much into my social life since it is the group activity that holds us together and not really social ties.

    Good luck! ♥

    Edited to add: I also forgot to mention that with these types of groups you are not required to always show up at a special time like you would with classes....you are able to drop in and show up when you want so that way if you decided to work instead that day, you can.
    Last edited by justanothercamgirl; 06-21-2016 at 10:24 AM. Reason: afterthought

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  40. #23
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    personally, I do not care about being lonely anymore, I am sooooo busy right now and I know I will have more time to meet friends and people in the near future. I currently live with my 2 sons who are 19 and 25.. so I am not really all that lonely.. I am 43 though.. ..Just go on about your life, keep busy and do you.. that's all the advice I can give you..

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  42. #24
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    I can relate to everything posted here, Ive had a super lonely summer and lost many many friends for various reasons including both my "BFFs"...it really sux but I let it get me way too down. I dont have a solution, i just try to focus on bettering myself as a person, focusing on future goals and reflecting..

    Just wanted to say anyone in need of a friend or cryin' shoulder can PM me, we could kik or something ^.^~ Ive been thru hell and back and I kno the isolation of cam only makes it worse sometimes.






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  44. #25
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    Default Re: Dealing with lonely

    Do you think this also comes with age? When I was younger, I constantly have to be doing something or hanging with people! Nowadays all I want is SILENCE!
    Quote Originally Posted by anonymous camgirl View Post
    personally, I do not care about being lonely anymore, I am sooooo busy right now and I know I will have more time to meet friends and people in the near future. I currently live with my 2 sons who are 19 and 25.. so I am not really all that lonely.. I am 43 though.. ..Just go on about your life, keep busy and do you.. that's all the advice I can give you..
    Quote Originally Posted by ~Carmen~ View Post
    I can see you being 90 and flipping your long hair, still teasing the boys.



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