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Thread: New vanilla job is ruining my income

  1. #26
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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Oh lord this sounds worse and worse...



    Anyway, my friend has told me to get on the manager's good side, because he's a perv and he offered her a new phone and computer etc. So I guess I'm on his "good side" because he's been flirty with me via text, but if there isn't like a $5 raise in the next 24 hrs I'm out and I won't feel bad about him having to change the schedule.[/QUOTE]

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  3. #27
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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Quote Originally Posted by SavannahLynnn View Post
    He keeps telling me he doesn't date "pornstars or strippers"...
    What does that even mean?

    Sounds like an insecurity issue. He's either insecure about you making more money than he does, about you making money off of other men (i.e. because he can't cover your expenses), or about you being seen by other men. Or possibly all three. Would he have the same objection if you were a model?

    I don't mean to get the thread off-track, but that stuck out to me. His identity is tied up in something that you do, which is generally a sign of codependency.

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    Veteran Member Jinja's Avatar
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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    He keeps telling me he doesn't date "pornstars or strippers"
    And yet he's engaged to a cam girl.

    I don't get why it's ok for you to cam part time to make up for what you don't make at the gas station, but it's not ok for you to cam full time.


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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    I have a few questions:

    How long have you been with your fiance?
    Did you start camming before or after you started dating?
    If it was after, whos idea was it to cam?
    It if was before, how long did it take before you told him what you did?


    Now, I don't like that it always seems to be the first thing that everyone says is, "Well, if he doesn't like it, tell him he can pay your bills or get the fuck out!"
    If you're with someone, it's supposed to be a partnership. It's not supposed to be the kind of relationship that you give up over a job or just something you want to do. If a decision hurts one or both people in the relationship, then it's something that you should discuss and come to a compromise on, because if not, it affects the relationship.

    With that being said, your fiance should NOT be TELLING you what you should and should not be doing. This is something that should be discussed, but he shouldn't be dictating to you what you will be doing. I passed up a job offer a few weeks ago because my husband and I both agreed that making $500 a month where I normally make that in a few days was NOT worth me doing. We both know that if a job comes up and it is more stressful than it's worth that we will pass it up. Life is too short to spend it being unhappy or fighting.

    I read in one of your replies that he doesn't want to date a pornstar. With all due respect, camming does not make you a pornstar. I don't get why some cam models think that sitting infront of a webcam makes them a star. It really doesn't. Some guys like cam models because they are more "attainable" and seem more like the girl next door than say...I dunno Alexis Texas (I don't know a lot of pornstars, okay?! ) Explain to him what you do on cam and explain to him what your friend has said about your boss and what your boss has been doing.

    You can tell him that you can certainly stay with the shitty job and a creepy, perverted boss that wants you to give him head OR you can stay at home and cam and make more money and be happier and "look" for a job. Don't lie about looking for a job, actually do it, but look for a GOOD one, one that you won't be miserable with.

    I do what you to know that no matter what you do, if your fiance has a habit of telling you what you should be doing and makes you do things you don't want to do that getting married to him will only make that worse because he will then "own" you. I am not trying to accuse him of being one of those husbands that does that, I am just going off what you have said, so don't be offended. You need to do what's best for you and what makes you happy.

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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Quit the job and the boyfriend. Most of us will never be able to come back to vanilla jobs and what we need around is a supportive man, especially after dealing with asshats the whole day on cam.

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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    I cosign this post! That's why it's important to surround yourself with people who bring out the BEST, not the stress in you!

    Quote Originally Posted by ConnyLove View Post
    Quit the job and the boyfriend. Most of us will never be able to come back to vanilla jobs and what we need around is a supportive man, especially after dealing with asshats the whole day on cam.
    Quote Originally Posted by ~Carmen~ View Post
    I can see you being 90 and flipping your long hair, still teasing the boys.




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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Savannah, is this the same guy from https://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sh...e-some-support ? If it is, I suggest going through and re-reading some of the responses in that thread. And really think about WHY you are in a relationship with this man. Being with someone just to be with someone and avoid being alone is never a good idea. I'd rather be alone and happy over with someone who makes me sad.

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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Isn't your first priority your child? Going into debt, being broke, working for a pervert & a friend who recommended the job so she can get more goodies out of him.. And you have to ask?

    There are other men in the world to date. I'm sure he is not your only option. He'd rather see you miserable & broke than able to support your child. Sounds like a winner to me. I have to ask "Why do you feel guilty?" Are you not just as exploited & used working for a perv for min. wage? Does it make you feel better, safer, more secure to work shit shifts being hitting on by men all day for less money than it takes to cover bills? This makes your boyfriend happY?

    So you put your friends happiness, your bosses happiness & your boyfriend's happiness over your own? More importantly your daughter's?

    You would rather be miserable & broke to keep a man?

    Everyone matters but you? Honestly, keeping a man rather than choosing your kid security seems WRONG to me.

    Sam


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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Are you guys actually fighting about an extra $90 a week? I've gotten into a similar situation with my fiancé, I immediately solved it by just being online for six days instead of five. That would be a really easy solution.

    My two cents.

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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Do what makes you happy. Life's too damn short to do otherwise.






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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Quote Originally Posted by SavannahLynnn View Post
    He keeps telling me he doesn't date "pornstars or strippers"


    Quit job, disregard asshole, acquire currency.







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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    You have to do what is best for you and your sanity, if you are able to make $500 or more a week from camming then go with camming, you will probably a little more happy since you are working from home and literally control your own income.

    $160 for me is half hour escort booking. With camming and escorting yea I am always flush, it does not make any sense to keep a job to make other people happy because you will just end up more miserable.
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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Quote Originally Posted by justsometwat View Post
    I have a few questions:

    How long have you been with your fiance?
    Did you start camming before or after you started dating?
    If it was after, whos idea was it to cam?
    It if was before, how long did it take before you told him what you did?

    I'm going to try and answer all your questions in this post because I'm not sure how to do multiple quotes :/
    I have been with my fiance for 2.5 years, I started camming after we'd been together almost 2 years. I came up with the idea.. we cammed together for a while, so he knew right away.

    Sam, you are right and I've explained to him that it is more important to be able to support my daughter first and foremost and for both of us to be happy.. and that there are realistically plenty of men out there who would be extrememly appreciative of all that I do.

    Yes, this is the same guy from all my relationship threads. but I didn't want this to be a thread about him... More as a pros and cons of this vanilla job.. The one main reason I got the job was to pay taxes with and fill gaps in my employment history.. and to see if I have the patience for a regular job. If I don't then there is n o point in shooting for doctor or medicine or P.A.

    Regardless, I still appreciated each and every one of your answers. You all are like the family I never had


    "We must try not to sink beneath out anguish, but battle on." - Albus Dumbledore


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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Quote Originally Posted by Sabihah View Post


    Quit job, disregard asshole, acquire currency.

    HAHAHA! Thanks, I needed that. Idk that made me giggle really hard.


    "We must try not to sink beneath out anguish, but battle on." - Albus Dumbledore


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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Quote Originally Posted by SavannahLynnn View Post
    The one main reason I got the job was to pay taxes with and fill gaps in my employment history.. and to see if I have the patience for a regular job. If I don't then there is n o point in shooting for doctor or medicine or P.A.
    i disagree with this - theres a difference between a dead end min wage job and a career. what you have now is a min wage dead end job with no future and ur talking about using it as a test sample for a career . its almost like saying u dont like oranges because u bit an apple and didnt like it and theyre both fruits so they'll taste the same simply because of the fact theyre both fruits and all fruits are alike when theyre not.

    i think its awesome u have a aspiration to have a career and i think you should really reconsider not trying to pursue it. i know some ppl are older and cam no shade on them when i say this - can u do this all ur life? can u see urself 40-50-60-and camming still ? think about ur future and what u really wanna do . u can cam and go to school - its one of the many awesome things about online adult work . its always there when u want to work and can start taking the steps to make the life u want it around it and making great money doing it
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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Quote Originally Posted by SavannahLynnn View Post
    I didn't want this to be a thread about him... More as a pros and cons of this vanilla job.. The one main reason I got the job was to pay taxes with and fill gaps in my employment history.. and to see if I have the patience for a regular job. If I don't then there is n o point in shooting for doctor or medicine or P.A.
    I can understand that. I think most of us are seeing this as he wanted you to get the vanilla job and that's why you did it. At least that's what I thought. It's just going to be rough with a minimum wage job though. Even juggling 2 regular jobs is tough. Maybe you can look for something else you might enjoy more. Why get paid minimum wage to be looked at as a piece of meat? There are a lot more jobs out there, and while you may not be treated like a princess, you could be respected. Otherwise, open a bank account and put 25% of each check in there. When tax time comes next year you'll be prepared.

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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    I agree with Snowy. Doing shitty work for minimum wage is worlds away from a comfortable but challenging job with benefits and a good salary. The fact that you don't have the patience to basically give away your time at a gas station is really a good thing. If you want to get a taste of a vanilla backup job, volunteer with a non-profit related to the industry/profession you're interested in.






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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Quote Originally Posted by SavannahLynnn View Post

    Anyway, my friend has told me to get on the manager's good side, because he's a perv and he offered her a new phone and computer etc. So I guess I'm on his "good side" because he's been flirty with me via text, but if there isn't like a $5 raise in the next 24 hrs I'm out and I won't feel bad about him having to change the schedule.
    Girl, can I quit FOR you? No way in hell would I deal with some pervy guy for minimum wage (or close to), let alone at a gas station. Just ugh. I can't.

    My policy is that if guys be pervin up on me, I need to be compensated well. That's why I cam. Cut out the bs, and get on the "good side" of guys you don't even have to see, who can pamper you way more <3

    Random creeps remind me of alllllll the timewasters and freeloaders we deal with already. The thought of giving an irl creeper/cheapass my mere physical presence and conversation, let alone working for one, makes me want to vomit. xD

    I only scanned the thread, but it looks like most of what needs to be said about your bf has already been said. I'm honestly baffled why he would want you to work at a gas station or why you started working there in the first place. Do what works best for your child and you


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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    I got a vanilla job working at a coffee stand in a supermarket. I decided to work it because camming often makes me depressed, I don't know why. I felt a sense of "accomplishment" working a "real" job and making "honest" money like other people, I guess. But I was working only 10-20 hours a week (still enough to make me too tired to cam with my sleep disorder) and pulling in maybe $90-$120... We've been going underwater since. I quit that job a few weeks ago, and now I have no outlet, and I'm still depressed.

    If you feel like you "get" something from your vanilla job that you don't get from camming, I would recommend that you just stay with it and arrange all of your time wisely... But if it's honestly just a drain on your energy that you could use to cam more often, quit.

    I wish I had kept my job because it provided me something other than a guaranteed small check every week. But I guess I'm just trying to find myself right now.
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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    I know what you mean, Camming makes me depressed also for no reason, but if i am making money then i am happy but still depressed..lol.. I think it's depressing to recount your life and your past over and over and over again..... i think that's why.

    Quote Originally Posted by Pearl_Sugar View Post
    I got a vanilla job working at a coffee stand in a supermarket. I decided to work it because camming often makes me depressed, I don't know why. I felt a sense of "accomplishment" working a "real" job and making "honest" money like other people, I guess. But I was working only 10-20 hours a week (still enough to make me too tired to cam with my sleep disorder) and pulling in maybe $90-$120... We've been going underwater since. I quit that job a few weeks ago, and now I have no outlet, and I'm still depressed.

    If you feel like you "get" something from your vanilla job that you don't get from camming, I would recommend that you just stay with it and arrange all of your time wisely... But if it's honestly just a drain on your energy that you could use to cam more often, quit.

    I wish I had kept my job because it provided me something other than a guaranteed small check every week. But I guess I'm just trying to find myself right now.

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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    Pearl, what about volunteering at an animal shelter, reading to sick children or visiting the elderly? Would any of those help? (sorry for the thread jack. I agree with all the other girls regarding the OP's situation. Especially since it's a GAS STATION! People are always getting held up and worse at those places.)

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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    I got a vanilla job working at a coffee stand in a supermarket. I decided to work it because camming often makes me depressed, I don't know why. I felt a sense of "accomplishment" working a "real" job and making "honest" money like other people, I guess. But I was working only 10-20 hours a week (still enough to make me too tired to cam with my sleep disorder) and pulling in maybe $90-$120... We've been going underwater since. I quit that job a few weeks ago, and now I have no outlet, and I'm still depressed.
    There is indeed some psychological benefit to being successful at a 'real' job your parents, friends etc. respect. But in today's economy, without some 'professional' credentials, the after-tax / after expenses economics of a low paying 'real' job simply no longer 'computes'. And if you wind up devoting time and effort to a low paying 'real' job, this pretty much guarantees that you'll never be able to devote the time and effort ( not to mention tuition money ) to obtain those 'professional' credentials.

    And to top things off, if a child is involved, the impact of working at a low paying 'real' job will directly translate into negative effects on that child. Besides the time spent at the job instead of with the child, there will also be 'trickle-down' financial issues i.e. can't afford to provide XYZ for the child.


    bottom line is this ! Short of marriage ( and often even with marriage ), the ultimately responsibility for providing for yourself and your child falls to you. And there are only so many hours in the day / only so many years of peak earnings opportunity in an adult entertainment industry career.

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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    YEA! what she said!.. And I would like to add with my own experience raising kids as a full time cam model ( for 12 yrs) without a male role model for my kids in the last 14 yrs ... My kids have had every advantage to them and have grown up not wanting for anything and had their mom's full time attention, They grew up to respect women, respect themselves and are intelligent and educated with a good head on their shoulder.. you know why?? because I was always their, at all the parent /teacher meetings, the pta, the soccer games.. to pick them up from school, To counsel them , to sit down with them at dinner, we never lived in some poverty stricken hood or have an absentee parent who is not their because i would have had to work 2 or 3 jobs to support us.. this is why I DEFEND cam above all else when it comes to people IRL... they have NO clue what they are talking about and what is best for my children.. also my kids have healthy views about sex and they are well rounded.. they aren't addicted to porn they arent addicted to sex, or drugs or anything cuz they grew up with mom being a camgirl and porn as her DAY JOB.. so to them it is acceptable and they don't see anything wrong or shameful about it. And because of this my son gets to be in college and he graduated from high school with HONORS.. so think about that ..don't listen to the naysayers.. I would like to hear about other parents who raised successful children in this business other than my own experiences.

    Quote Originally Posted by Melonie View Post
    There is indeed some psychological benefit to being successful at a 'real' job your parents, friends etc. respect. But in today's economy, without some 'professional' credentials, the after-tax / after expenses economics of a low paying 'real' job simply no longer 'computes'. And if you wind up devoting time and effort to a low paying 'real' job, this pretty much guarantees that you'll never be able to devote the time and effort ( not to mention tuition money ) to obtain those 'professional' credentials.

    And to top things off, if a child is involved, the impact of working at a low paying 'real' job will directly translate into negative effects on that child. Besides the time spent at the job instead of with the child, there will also be 'trickle-down' financial issues i.e. can't afford to provide XYZ for the child.


    bottom line is this ! Short of marriage ( and often even with marriage ), the ultimately responsibility for providing for yourself and your child falls to you. And there are only so many hours in the day / only so many years of peak earnings opportunity in an adult entertainment industry career.

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  40. #49
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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    One of my friends was a stripper & hooker, her boys grew up to be great guys, one is a doctor & the other a lawyer.

    I know plenty of straight people in normal jobs who are miserable with horrible drug addict kids. Fact is it depends on your parenting skills, NOT your job.

    Keep choosing a man over your kid & show her how she will never be as in important as he is in your life. I've seen the damage that has done to plenty of my friends in life.

    What is depressing to me is having to work on a pretty day & not go to the beach. What depresses me is having a migraine yet have to finish a 8 hour shift. What depresses me is having to beg a boss for a vacation or holidays off to spend with my family.

    I've worked regular jobs, ya'll are being delusional to think it is legit & way to go in life. And if it is, then shut the fuck up & get out of camming & go work a full time job of 40 to 60 hours a week & another part time job of 10 to 20 hours a week in order to pay the bills. Personally, I cherish life & my down time to be working for someone else at shit wages & stressed about their business.

    I make in one day what took me a 40 hour week to do in an office where I was looked down upon for my tits being so big. Yet, I restructured their whole system & made it all run better from a receptionist desk. So much so the president & vice president flew up from Atlanta to meet me. Did I get a raise? NO Did I get a better position with benefits? NO What did happen was the company eventually went under & everyone fired, 6 months after I quit.

    Ya'll can dream about the so-called real world, but remember men in that 'real world' log onto cam sites to forget about it.

    Go to a temp agency, have them place you in jobs. Chase down a check & not have the gas in the car to pick it up. Go ahead romanticize a world that most normal people hate but feel like it is the only option.

    Fuck a real job. I get depressed when I don't have money for bills or a night out on the town whenever I want it. I love camming, I love porn & have absolutely no guilt. Nor will I ever let a man make me feel guilty about it. Trust me, if it isn't your job, he will find another reason to bring you down. Why the fuck would anyone want to be with a man like that?

    Smooches,
    Sam


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    Default Re: New vanilla job is ruining my income

    You are such an awesome lady... love it!!.. Whenever i get cranky and start hating cam, I go outside during rush hour traffic, I call my sister and her friend who REFUSE to do this for a living and would rather raise her kids at a truck stop with no home to go to .. I feel bad for the kids because they are not turning out very good and i pray for them.. they are 13 and 15.. the boy is in trouble at school and acts out alot , the girl is seeking male attention and acts and dresses sexually.. but they would rather live this life of no food , no shelter, nothing waiting on a job that is not going to pay them what they are worth.. I did offer to show them how to get started in this but it's not for them they say. Yea and i think about how I wouldn't afford to go to work because of the gas prices.. Not a life .. right now i own a house, putting my son through college , pay child support for the other and looking at my next house to buy this year while keeping my 1st one.. this IS A LIFE! An opportunity that would NOT be available to me at a real job... so yea the freeloaders and the trolls and the bad days get to you.. but just remember where you started and it puts it all in perspective.

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post
    One of my friends was a stripper & hooker, her boys grew up to be great guys, one is a doctor & the other a lawyer.

    I know plenty of straight people in normal jobs who are miserable with horrible drug addict kids. Fact is it depends on your parenting skills, NOT your job.

    Keep choosing a man over your kid & show her how she will never be as in important as he is in your life. I've seen the damage that has done to plenty of my friends in life.

    What is depressing to me is having to work on a pretty day & not go to the beach. What depresses me is having a migraine yet have to finish a 8 hour shift. What depresses me is having to beg a boss for a vacation or holidays off to spend with my family.

    I've worked regular jobs, ya'll are being delusional to think it is legit & way to go in life. And if it is, then shut the fuck up & get out of camming & go work a full time job of 40 to 60 hours a week & another part time job of 10 to 20 hours a week in order to pay the bills. Personally, I cherish life & my down time to be working for someone else at shit wages & stressed about their business.

    I make in one day what took me a 40 hour week to do in an office where I was looked down upon for my tits being so big. Yet, I restructured their whole system & made it all run better from a receptionist desk. So much so the president & vice president flew up from Atlanta to meet me. Did I get a raise? NO Did I get a better position with benefits? NO What did happen was the company eventually went under & everyone fired, 6 months after I quit.

    Ya'll can dream about the so-called real world, but remember men in that 'real world' log onto cam sites to forget about it.

    Go to a temp agency, have them place you in jobs. Chase down a check & not have the gas in the car to pick it up. Go ahead romanticize a world that most normal people hate but feel like it is the only option.

    Fuck a real job. I get depressed when I don't have money for bills or a night out on the town whenever I want it. I love camming, I love porn & have absolutely no guilt. Nor will I ever let a man make me feel guilty about it. Trust me, if it isn't your job, he will find another reason to bring you down. Why the fuck would anyone want to be with a man like that?

    Smooches,
    Sam

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