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Thread: Extras w/o expectations

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    Default Extras w/o expectations

    I have been a very casual customer to clubs. So coming off of a relationship I decided to go out and enjoy myself lately.
    Recently getting a VIP room with the only expectation of a good solid lap dance, it went beyond that... without any true intentions of going that far with one Dancer.
    Traded #'s after and we have met up a few times OTC and even for a casual no sex meetings like coffee and lunch.
    She doesn't seem to have any real issues but she is a little cash dependant but w/in my realms of affordability. I see no signs of drug use from her either and I consider myself pretty
    street wise. In all honesty I don't think they make that much in this area...
    I am considering putting a hold on this, due to some caution or gut feeling. I have gone back to the club generally to see her however I noticed she gets very clingy at the club...
    In all honesty I wish I could go back to when I was just expecting to get a solid lap dance and maybe move on to another dancer...
    My one issue is this is the only club I like in town.... or should I just slow it down and give it time... or should I be straight up with her?

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    She doesn't want you to spend money on other dancers coz she wants it for herself. Keep the money flowing and all will be fine

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    Crossfingers Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by Shy2 View Post
    She doesn't want you to spend money on other dancers coz she wants it for herself. Keep the money flowing and all will be fine
    Thanks I will keep this in mind.

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious2 View Post
    In all honesty I wish I could go back to when I was just expecting to get a solid lap dance and maybe move on to another dancer...
    My one issue is this is the only club I like in town.... or should I just slow it down and give it time... or should I be straight up with her?
    ^If you want to get a LD from another dancer it's your choice. Or, if you just want a LD and not to "hang out" with this girl at the club, let her know. She will still be getting paid for the lap dance, so I doubt she will mind too much. Regulars come and go, it happens and she is probably used to it (it happens to everyone eventually).
    “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” -Marilyn Monroe

    "True sexiness has many facets-confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. It isn’t just about trying to look sexy; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical"-Dita Von Teese

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by Shy2 View Post
    She doesn't want you to spend money on other dancers coz she wants it for herself. Keep the money flowing and all will be fine
    This. Reinforce her negative behavior by rewarding bad habits.
    Nope silly, its just a persona that entertains the masses, yourself included. - KS_Stevia

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Good customers must be hard to come by. (No pun intended.) Who is to say another dancer would not have done the same thing to make you her regular. If money is slow, they are probably desperate to make and keep regulars. This is just like any other business... if you are in sales, you want to keep your customers happy, and you don't want them testing out the competition.

    Assuming she is very attractive and fun to spend time with, I see no problems. But, me personally, I would keep it in the club and not meet her OTC so as to keep it simple. (If you meet OTC for pay-for-play, then, keep that simple too, don't treat it like a real date.) And, if any drama unfolds, just quit seeing her and quit going to the club.
    Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.
    - Oscar Wilde

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    It may be easier for him to only see her OTC. He's already been seen with her, and if she's guarding him, the other dancers won't want to deal with her drama or his, expecting he'll want extras from every dancer.

    OP, you should probably go ahead and sugar baby this dancer, take care of her bills and set her up in a place to live, before things get worse.
    Last edited by Doc Holliday; 04-09-2014 at 10:04 AM.
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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by Doc Holliday View Post
    This. Reinforce her negative behavior by rewarding bad habits.
    It's not a bad habit for her though. It's a good habit. If he doesn't like it then he needs to say something but this isn't a character flaw on her part nor something that she needs to correct. She's doing her job.

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    if you don't want to see her anymore OTC, tell her that..as long as you are getting dances, it shouldn't be a problem ( unless she is a nutcase who has other things in mind). if you dont want to get dances with her, when she comes up to you say, " hey good to see you! i'm actually here to get dances with another girl, but we will catch up soon" or something like that. or just stop spending money on her, and she should get the hint and leave. i don't see how this is a big problem? if things are slow, she wants to keep a good reg, but it is your money and your choice so handle it accordingly

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious2 View Post
    In all honesty I wish I could go back to when I was just expecting to get a solid lap dance and maybe move on to another dancer...
    My one issue is this is the only club I like in town.... or should I just slow it down and give it time... or should I be straight up with her?
    Too many what if's here. It's your money, spend it how you want to spend it. Can you move on to another dancer without causing drama with the first girl? Maybe, maybe not but there is only one way to find out. Most dancers will get the hint and move on when the y money dries up.
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    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
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    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by MarvelGirl View Post
    It's not a bad habit for her though. It's a good habit. If he doesn't like it then he needs to say something but this isn't a character flaw on her part nor something that she needs to correct. She's doing her job.
    unexpected extras sound like free extras which is passing up money a customer would have spent trying to get those extras. This guy might not have. But why not test it out and drive up the demand? Now he's already had it and wants to move on with the money he potentionally could have spent getting what she gave away.
    Nope silly, its just a persona that entertains the masses, yourself included. - KS_Stevia

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by Doc Holliday View Post
    unexpected extras sound like free extras which is passing up money a customer would have spent trying to get those extras. This guy might not have. But why not test it out and drive up the demand? Now he's already had it and wants to move on with the money he potentionally could have spent getting what she gave away.
    He said flat out there's been no sex outside of the club and that she's "cash dependent" so what has she given away? Even if she did have sex with him or spend time for free, so what? How is that negative behavior? She's an adult woman. Maybe she likes him or maybe she thinks the extras in VIP are expected. I wonder what the extras were too. Did she ride him in VIP or did she just let him suck on her boobs? We don't know.

    If he wants to spend time with another dancer, he needs to say so. It would be stupid for us to assume that a customer is tired of us or that he wants variety and avoid him. If he's afraid that she's getting attached and he doesn't want that, he needs to say something. We aren't mind readers.

    But it's not in her best interest for him to go spend money on another dancer. Why would she care if he's willing to spend money on another dancer for things she did for free? She only loses in that scenario. Another girl profiting doesn't help her at all.

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    I agree she should rope him in as long as she can. But a guy will always try harder (spend more) to get satisified than after he's satified. It's like spontaneously spending money on ice cream or candy; you'll do it if you're hungry, when you won't if you're full.

    So, although he didn't say what she did...


    Quote Originally Posted by Curious2 View Post
    and even for a casual no sex meetings like coffee and lunch.

    makes

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious2 View Post
    Recently getting a VIP room with the only expectation of a good solid lap dance, it went beyond that... without any true intentions of going that far

    and

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious2 View Post
    we have met up a few times OTC

    sound like she satisfied him (whatever that may be).
    Last edited by Doc Holliday; 04-09-2014 at 12:49 PM.
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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by Doc Holliday View Post
    I agree she should rope him in as long as she can. But a guy will always try harder (spend more) to get satisified than after he's satified. It's like spontaneously spending money on ice cream or candy; you'll do it if you're hungry, when you won't if you're full.
    But when you are hungry again you will buy more ice cream, candy or VIP...
    Last edited by yoda57us; 04-09-2014 at 04:05 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
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    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Many interesting opinions and don't disagree with anyone in particular...

    Thank you everyone. Much to ponder... In all honesty she is cool so I may just still will continue to hang with her but probably will try to express that I want a little time first at the club and just will see her before I leave and see how it goes...

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    I guarantee you he would not be saying that had she edged him and left him broke and blue-balled. He would've came back when he had the money and tried to finish what she started. If she left him blue balled again, he would've done it all over.

    I don't know anything about the stripper's end, but from the custy's end, a guy's dick will win over logic any day. Horny is like the only emotion we lose our minds to.

    Don't give away what you can get them spending to try.
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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Everytime I read posts like this it depresses the hell out of me.

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    OP - she's overplaying her hand. What you describe as"clingy", she thinks is "giving you all her attention". Yes she's cash dependent - when a dancer finds a guy willing to continue giving her money - especially outside the club - she will take it, and all she can. Hopefully she knows her game well enough to sheer a sheep and not fleece it, as they say. In any event - enjoy her company, and realize that she THINKS she's giving you what you want in exchange for that money. If you don't like what you're getting - tell her. If she's smart, she'll happily adjust the situation to suit your tastes if it means keeping a steady customer.

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by MarvelGirl View Post
    It's not a bad habit for her though. It's a good habit. If he doesn't like it then he needs to say something but this isn't a character flaw on her part nor something that she needs to correct. She's doing her job.
    exactly

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by MarvelGirl View Post
    She's an adult woman. Maybe she likes him
    If she was doing extras because she was into him, that's another story. It's her personal life.

    But if it was work, her job is to make money, not give it away. Of course he didn't ever say what she gave away, but he hinted at sex, and he clearly lost interest. Now she's lost that money she could have earned and he running around talking about it.
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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by Doc Holliday View Post
    I guarantee you he would not be saying that had she edged him and left him broke and blue-balled. He would've came back when he had the money and tried to finish what she started. If she left him blue balled again, he would've done it all over.

    I don't know anything about the stripper's end, but from the custy's end, a guy's dick will win over logic any day. Horny is like the only emotion we lose our minds to.

    Don't give away what you can get them spending to try.
    Or he never would have come back and just gone and gotten extras from another girl.

    You can't use the "don't give the milk away for free" analogy in this situation. I can do my best to seduce a guy into a lap dance over sex, but if all he REALLY wants is a blow job there's really not that much I can do. And it doesn't help that there are probably five girls in the club that are willing to do that.

    There are some customers who can may be hoping for sex but be satisfied with a lap dance and then there are dirty horny bastards who just can't let the "please suck my dick" go.

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    OP, it is simple. Everything she is doing (OTC meets, clinging, etc.) are for the purpose of keeping you happy and spending. Her actions ITC also have the secondary benefit of marking her turf. If you let her know that you are unhappy with how it's playing out, I'm guessing that she'll back off, but however she reacts, it is something that needs doing. She is playing the hard press, so trying to be cute or subtle is probably not going to cut it. Keep in mind that it is not her job to encourage or make it easier for you to spend money on someone else. But if she thinks that she risks losing your cash completely, I'm sure she'll come around.

    As an aside, the OTC element didn't make things any easier for you. IME, taking girls OTC tends to significantly ratchet up the ownership drama ITC. Same holds true when you become a serious contributor to a girl's income. In the future, you may want to exercise more care in choosing who you do those things with if you don't want deal with these types of issues again.

    Good luck!

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by audrey_k View Post
    but if all he REALLY wants is a blow job there's really not that much I can do. And it doesn't help that there are probably five girls in the club that are willing to do that.
    The dark nature of capitalism. I know I've been stubborn on the isue. I'll never understand extras. Of course, I want a blow job, but I don't go to a strip club to get one. I enjoy getting teased. It's like being fifteen all over again, getting intimate with a girl, taking her clothes off, and... it ending there. Once you become an adult, if you get the point of clothes coming off, it goes all the way. So, for me strip clubs are the thrill of being a frustrated teen all over again.

    But some men don't get that as you said.

    Quote Originally Posted by audrey_k View Post
    There are some customers who can may be hoping for sex but be satisfied with a lap dance and then there are dirty horny bastards who just can't let the "please suck my dick" go.

    In another thread, MarvelGirl explained that strippers deal with loads more abuse than escorts. Some men can't handle the frustration and become abusive dicks over it. Then, other men get off on financialy dominating women and seeing how far they can get someone needing money to go for as little as they can. But all that said, you should still be able to use Jedi mind tricks on them.

    tuscl is a board full of $80 blow job fanboys (I'm sure they love me throwing them under the bus) who all have spent well over that without any extras. Here's a recent thread full of no sex stories in the range of a $500 or more from guys who rampantly front about their cheap extras.

    https://www.tuscl.net/postread.php?PID=28635


    It's capitalism, if girls are doing more for less it's tough to hustle. But, at the same clubs with prostitutes running cheap tricks around $60-100 in Dallas, they have $400-600 VIPs getting used by strict dancers. So, it just seems to me, extras do nothing but cut off your own income, risk cutting off the income of everyone in the club, and increase customer expectations. But it is easier, I will give you that.


    I'll get off my soapbox, now. I won't bring up extras for another couple years.


    Audrey, Marvel, I appreciate the insight into getting in through my thick skull why extras happen and happen on the cheap.
    Nope silly, its just a persona that entertains the masses, yourself included. - KS_Stevia

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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by Doc Holliday View Post
    The dark nature of capitalism. I know I've been stubborn on the isue. I'll never understand extras. Of course, I want a blow job, but I don't go to a strip club to get one. I enjoy getting teased. It's like being fifteen all over again, getting intimate with a girl, taking her clothes off, and... it ending there. Once you become an adult, if you get the point of clothes coming off, it goes all the way. So, for me strip clubs are the thrill of being a frustrated teen all over again.

    But some men don't get that as you said.




    In another thread, MarvelGirl explained that strippers deal with loads more abuse than escorts. Some men can't handle the frustration and become abusive dicks over it. Then, other men get off on financialy dominating women and seeing how far they can get someone needing money to go for as little as they can. But all that said, you should still be able to use Jedi mind tricks on them.

    tuscl is a board full of $80 blow job fanboys (I'm sure they love me throwing them under the bus) who all have spent well over that without any extras. Here's a recent thread full of no sex stories in the range of a $500 or more from guys who rampantly front about their cheap extras.

    https://www.tuscl.net/postread.php?PID=28635


    It's capitalism, if girls are doing more for less it's tough to hustle. But, at the same clubs with prostitutes running cheap tricks around $60-100 in Dallas, they have $400-600 VIPs getting used by strict dancers. So, it just seems to me, extras do nothing but cut off your own income, risk cutting off the income of everyone in the club, and increase customer expectations. But it is easier, I will give you that.


    I'll get off my soapbox, now. I won't bring up extras for another couple years.


    Audrey, Marvel, I appreciate the insight into getting in through my thick skull why extras happen and happen on the cheap.
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    DH, if you're going to link posts from other websites, please at least do it from posters with some "cred" rather than one of many trolls/spammers.

    OP, I second ricks, and AJ's comments.
    Last edited by minnow; 04-11-2014 at 01:21 PM. Reason: corr. terminology
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    Default Re: Extras w/o expectations

    Quote Originally Posted by minnow View Post
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    DH, if you're going to lift posts from other websites, please at least do it from posters with some "cred" rather than one of many trolls/spammers.
    Well, strictly speaking he didn't lift a post. He posted a link. I frown on lifting posts from TUSCL or any other site for that matter. I delete it when I see it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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