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Thread: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

  1. #901
    Veteran Member SweetLilyRaven's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    I wish I could give you big hugs and some motivating words, Mia. I know the struggle and hopelessness of severe depression. All I can offer is a listening ear and a cam buddy. I'd be happy to do what JAC has also offered - taking baby steps together to get on cam and working again. I'm always online, so PM me anytime you want.

    In other news, the cramping and bleeding from last month's IUD placement is finally easing up enough to work on cam again. I went on yesterday for two shifts and nearly made my daily high goal - I missed it by $8!! I'm so happy about it and relieved to finally be working again. Our first car payment is due in 2 days, and the mortgage is coming up on the 15th. Those two bills alone will take up my hubby's paycheck completely…so I need to hustle BIG to cover the rest of the month's expenses. Not stressful or anything, right?? I'm not sure how I'm going to make it through this long 4 day weekend. The kids are home all day today and Monday, and there's not a drop of alcohol in the house. Normally I'd have a drink or two to help take the edge off my nervousness about being on cam (I'm insanely shy). I need to hustle BIG this weekend! Wish me luck...


    [/URL]
    Quote Originally Posted by TinaLayne View Post
    "Are you wet bb?"
    Yep, your riveting conversation has my cooch a drippin...oh wait, that's just the lube, nevermind.
    Quote Originally Posted by pippapippa View Post
    My charity, my kindness... yep, that's why I'm a camgirl.
    Giving out boners for free since 2013. I'm practically a nonprofit.

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  3. #902
    God/dess justanothercamgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    I've been getting sicker faster then I originally estimated. Not a pleasant surprise to say the least.

    Since I haven't been on SM for the last week I finally said 'fuck it' and decided to celebrate my calling it quits on the site by dying over my 'punk rock' hair colour with a normal one.

    I've been forced to keep the same hair colour for 3 years now in the name of hustling and persona

    Even though I am still getting used to it.......seeing myself in the mirror has definitely been giving me an inner feeling of freedom.

    I have no doubt that I will return back to Streamate again someday to work and I currently have no idea how my bills are going to be paid. I am jumping straight into a free-fall and hoping against hope that some sort of net will appear to catch me.

    But I'll deal with all of that when it comes. Right now I am just enjoying blending into a crowd for a change.


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  5. #903
    Senior Member MiaFaye's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    I'm dedicating today to trying to work. I have 10 days to make the £325 I need for Novembers rent. I can do that no problem if I can get back on the horse. It's coming up to 6am now, and I'm just heading to bed, so I probably won't be up until at least 4pm. Will start prettying up and setting up my cam space by 5. My doctor prescribed me diazepam for my anxiety, so hopefully that will help.

    Ugh. Get. It. Together.
    January-September Goal





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  7. #904
    God/dess SweetJulia's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    I'm so hating life right now, I'm getting symptoms of ulcerating again. I'm miserably depressed and my meds aren't working. My ancient doctor won't give me ones that do. I just don't even want to get out of bed..
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    Quote Originally Posted by xStacey View Post
    Close contact, for an hour, for $40? And I guess I'll have to make conversation with them too?

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  9. #905
    Veteran Member reversecowgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Not many posts lately, everyone ok?

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  11. #906
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    I have had a cold the last four days and today my allergies are acting up. I feel blah but still managing to cam here and there.

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  13. #907
    Veteran Member ivybunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Quote Originally Posted by MiaFaye View Post
    I'm dedicating today to trying to work. I have 10 days to make the £325 I need for Novembers rent. I can do that no problem if I can get back on the horse. It's coming up to 6am now, and I'm just heading to bed, so I probably won't be up until at least 4pm. Will start prettying up and setting up my cam space by 5. My doctor prescribed me diazepam for my anxiety, so hopefully that will help.

    Ugh. Get. It. Together.
    My experience with benzos and camming is finding a perfect middle ground. Giving fewer fucks so you don't get anxious on camera but not so much that you give no fucks about paying your bills and therefore don't stay on cam.

    Although I've had diazepam once for laser eye surgery and it felt different than any of the other (aka ALL OF THE OTHER) benzos. I just kind of watched Dr. Phil in a daze without realizing that I would normally be bashing myself over the head for watching Dr. Phil. And a lot of, "Sunlight... Pretty!!"


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  15. #908
    Veteran Member ivybunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    If that doesn't work, consider asking your doctor about Ativan. It takes longer to kick in, longer to kick out, and doesn't kick you in the balls and make you drop out like some of the others (Xanax). Since camming takes fairly long shifts (2-5 hours for me), this is usually just enough to stick out that length of time, where others will wear off 20 mins in and you'll just wanna jump off. If they don't hit you like a ton of bricks and you don't get on at all.

    Just take it about 20 mins before you start camming and it'll creep up on you that, hey, camming and making some moolah isn't such a daunting prospect anymore.


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  17. #909
    God/dess justanothercamgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Quote Originally Posted by reversecowgirl View Post
    Not many posts lately, everyone ok?
    Sadly, lately I've just pretty much been sleeping my days away.

    How are things with you? <3

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  19. #910
    Veteran Member SweetLilyRaven's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Fuck…my mystery symptoms are back, on top of a resurgence of cramps and bleeding. Painfully swollen hands and feet, joint pain so bad that it makes me want to cry whenever I have to move, and muscle weakness that leaves me feeling as strong as an overcooked noodle. I've been tested up the wazoo for everything from MS to rheumatoid arthritis and nothing ever came back. I thought it might be Lyme disease for a long time since I was bitten by a deer tick in July 2013 and the symptoms started in September of that year, but the Lyme test came back negative. I could barely even walk my daughter to the end of the driveway to get on the bus this morning…and now I'm collapsed on the couch. I can't keep living like this, but there's nothing I can do to alleviate these symptoms without stealing my mother's oxy (which alleviates the joint pain just enough for me to do anything) and begging my doctor to run more tests. I hate this so fucking much!!


    [/URL]
    Quote Originally Posted by TinaLayne View Post
    "Are you wet bb?"
    Yep, your riveting conversation has my cooch a drippin...oh wait, that's just the lube, nevermind.
    Quote Originally Posted by pippapippa View Post
    My charity, my kindness... yep, that's why I'm a camgirl.
    Giving out boners for free since 2013. I'm practically a nonprofit.

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  21. #911
    Veteran Member ivybunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Holy bajeezus... I'm so sorry... *tiny bear cub hug* since I'm sure a bear hug might make you cry.

    Idea: Since I don't make clips (at least not yet) I'm not sure if this would work, but god knows there's probably a guy out there with a fetish for girls crying. Actually, I'm sure there is. I say do one clip with waterproof, one with non-water proof mascara, and just cry it out, sister. I'm sure the authenticity of your frustration and exhaustion will make it a hit with that crowd and it'll at least be a tiny stream of passive income.

    Quote Originally Posted by SweetLilyRaven View Post
    Fuck…my mystery symptoms are back, on top of a resurgence of cramps and bleeding. Painfully swollen hands and feet, joint pain so bad that it makes me want to cry whenever I have to move, and muscle weakness that leaves me feeling as strong as an overcooked noodle. I've been tested up the wazoo for everything from MS to rheumatoid arthritis and nothing ever came back. I thought it might be Lyme disease for a long time since I was bitten by a deer tick in July 2013 and the symptoms started in September of that year, but the Lyme test came back negative. I could barely even walk my daughter to the end of the driveway to get on the bus this morning…and now I'm collapsed on the couch. I can't keep living like this, but there's nothing I can do to alleviate these symptoms without stealing my mother's oxy (which alleviates the joint pain just enough for me to do anything) and begging my doctor to run more tests. I hate this so fucking much!!
    Last edited by ivybunny; 10-29-2014 at 06:32 AM. Reason: Because time is linear but my reasoning apparently isn't.


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  23. #912
    Veteran Member reversecowgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Quote Originally Posted by SweetLilyRaven View Post
    Fuck…my mystery symptoms are back, on top of a resurgence of cramps and bleeding. Painfully swollen hands and feet, joint pain so bad that it makes me want to cry whenever I have to move, and muscle weakness that leaves me feeling as strong as an overcooked noodle. I've been tested up the wazoo for everything from MS to rheumatoid arthritis and nothing ever came back. I thought it might be Lyme disease for a long time since I was bitten by a deer tick in July 2013 and the symptoms started in September of that year, but the Lyme test came back negative. I could barely even walk my daughter to the end of the driveway to get on the bus this morning…and now I'm collapsed on the couch. I can't keep living like this, but there's nothing I can do to alleviate these symptoms without stealing my mother's oxy (which alleviates the joint pain just enough for me to do anything) and begging my doctor to run more tests. I hate this so fucking much!!
    Have you been tested for lupus? (I have it and what you describe sounds very familiar to me)

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  25. #913
    Veteran Member SweetLilyRaven's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Lupus is one thing I haven't been tested for, but it makes sense to me. I'll ask my doctor to run that test at the next appointment. Thank you guys, for the gentle hugs and comforting words. Ivy - that is a brilliant idea! Any little bit helps and if a guy gets off on my tears, then I'll be happy to take their money! I'm do a clip as soon as my son leaves for school after lunch! Thank you again...


    [/URL]
    Quote Originally Posted by TinaLayne View Post
    "Are you wet bb?"
    Yep, your riveting conversation has my cooch a drippin...oh wait, that's just the lube, nevermind.
    Quote Originally Posted by pippapippa View Post
    My charity, my kindness... yep, that's why I'm a camgirl.
    Giving out boners for free since 2013. I'm practically a nonprofit.

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  27. #914
    Veteran Member reversecowgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Quote Originally Posted by justanothercamgirl View Post
    Sadly, lately I've just pretty much been sleeping my days away.

    How are things with you? <3
    I'm alright. A shit ton of real life things going on but I'm holding on for the ride.

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  29. #915
    Veteran Member reversecowgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Quote Originally Posted by SweetLilyRaven View Post
    Lupus is one thing I haven't been tested for, but it makes sense to me. I'll ask my doctor to run that test at the next appointment. Thank you guys, for the gentle hugs and comforting words. Ivy - that is a brilliant idea! Any little bit helps and if a guy gets off on my tears, then I'll be happy to take their money! I'm do a clip as soon as my son leaves for school after lunch! Thank you again...
    Lupus is one that mimics other diseases, I was tested for Lyme and MS also, they were really convinced it was MS at first, until my skin rash popped up. Have you had any odd skin happenings on any part of you?

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  31. #916
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Checking in.
    Just started taking L-Theanine yesterday. Does anyone have experience with it? Maybe it's the placebo effect, but I think it actually makes my entire body feel relaxed. I took it late in the day, and was able to fall asleep right away, without melatonin.
    I just found out (by mail) Monday night, that a judge dismissed my 'poverty' (self employed) reason for not being able to serve jury duty, so I have to attend. My anxiety is through the roof about it! Plus the fact that I have to find someplace else to live less expensively, and with no money, or credit, it's all too much! to handle.

  32. #917
    God/dess SweetJulia's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Holy fuck, how is a nine day period even possible?! Awesome for anemics, just really makes us feel amazing. Ah well, I survived. Wine time.
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    Quote Originally Posted by xStacey View Post
    Close contact, for an hour, for $40? And I guess I'll have to make conversation with them too?

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  34. #918
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    ^^ I used to get nine day periods a lot. Mine always were at least 6-7 heavy flow days, but increased when I was having a lot of sex.
    Don't know if that correlates, or not. (I guess using dildos might count as well, because when I started menopause after my first year of camming, I started bleeding again, after using dildos.)
    So annoying.

  35. #919
    Veteran Member SweetLilyRaven's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by reversecowgirl View Post
    Lupus is one that mimics other diseases, I was tested for Lyme and MS also, they were really convinced it was MS at first, until my skin rash popped up. Have you had any odd skin happenings on any part of you?
    I don't. In fact, my skin has been clearer and softer than ever before (I have KP, so smooth skin skin is abnormal to me!). I just confirmed that my mother was diagnosed with lupus when I was a little kid, but they changed her diagnosis to Fibromyalgia when I was in high school. I didn't even think of lupus because I haven't had any rashes or sun sensitivity (other than burning in 5 minutes due to my pale skin), but most of the remaining symptoms read like a page out of my body journal.

    I started keeping a daily record of how I'm feeling each day, mentally and physically, along with a food diary. i wanted to be able to see if there were any patterns to my symptoms, or if there were any triggers. I did notice that the more meat and dairy I ate, the worse the symptoms got. Needless to say, I've gone back to a nearly vegan raw diet, which had been making feel a lot better until late last night. I need to stop rambling!!


    [/URL]
    Quote Originally Posted by TinaLayne View Post
    "Are you wet bb?"
    Yep, your riveting conversation has my cooch a drippin...oh wait, that's just the lube, nevermind.
    Quote Originally Posted by pippapippa View Post
    My charity, my kindness... yep, that's why I'm a camgirl.
    Giving out boners for free since 2013. I'm practically a nonprofit.

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  37. #920
    Veteran Member SweetLilyRaven's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Quote Originally Posted by reversecowgirl View Post
    Lupus is one that mimics other diseases, I was tested for Lyme and MS also, they were really convinced it was MS at first, until my skin rash popped up. Have you had any odd skin happenings on any part of you?
    I don't. In fact, my skin has been clearer and softer than ever before (I have KP, so smooth skin skin is abnormal to me!). I just confirmed that my mother was diagnosed with lupus when I was a little kid, but they changed her diagnosis to Fibromyalgia when I was in high school. I didn't even think of lupus because I haven't had any rashes or sun sensitivity (other than burning in 5 minutes due to my pale skin), but most of the remaining symptoms read like a page out of my body journal.

    I started keeping a daily record of how I'm feeling each day, mentally and physically, along with a food diary. i wanted to be able to see if there were any patterns to my symptoms, or if there were any triggers. I did notice that the more meat and dairy I ate, the worse the symptoms got. Needless to say, I've gone back to a nearly vegan raw diet, which had been making feel a lot better until late last night. I need to stop rambling!!


    [/URL]
    Quote Originally Posted by TinaLayne View Post
    "Are you wet bb?"
    Yep, your riveting conversation has my cooch a drippin...oh wait, that's just the lube, nevermind.
    Quote Originally Posted by pippapippa View Post
    My charity, my kindness... yep, that's why I'm a camgirl.
    Giving out boners for free since 2013. I'm practically a nonprofit.

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  39. #921
    Veteran Member reversecowgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamourmilf View Post
    Checking in.
    Just started taking L-Theanine yesterday. Does anyone have experience with it? Maybe it's the placebo effect, but I think it actually makes my entire body feel relaxed. I took it late in the day, and was able to fall asleep right away, without melatonin.
    I just found out (by mail) Monday night, that a judge dismissed my 'poverty' (self employed) reason for not being able to serve jury duty, so I have to attend. My anxiety is through the roof about it! Plus the fact that I have to find someplace else to live less expensively, and with no money, or credit, it's all too much! to handle.
    I take it. On days when I'm not quite as antsy, I'll just take one in the morning, and one around 2pm. On my super stressed out, anxious days, I take two in the morning, and then two around 2pm. If I take it with caffeine I get major insomnia, or a stressed out fitful sleep at best. It has definitely helped me.

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  41. #922
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    ^^Thank You!

  42. #923
    Veteran Member reversecowgirl's Avatar
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    You're welcome sweetpea. Hope it helps you mucho. lol

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  44. #924
    God/dess JaneBurgess's Avatar
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    Default Re: The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club

    Ativan is the exact same kind of drug as Xanax. It kicks in fast and takes hours to leave your system, I have a script for it, 1 mg pills but I cut them in half or I pass out. I only take it as needed because it makes me loopy and man do I sleep at night on a day I need it. I dont recommend anyone take a Benzo unless its as needed and you really need it. They are highly addictive and I mean highly. Ive only taken 1 in two months


    Quote Originally Posted by ivybunny View Post
    If that doesn't work, consider asking your doctor about Ativan. It takes longer to kick in, longer to kick out, and doesn't kick you in the balls and make you drop out like some of the others (Xanax). Since camming takes fairly long shifts (2-5 hours for me), this is usually just enough to stick out that length of time, where others will wear off 20 mins in and you'll just wanna jump off. If they don't hit you like a ton of bricks and you don't get on at all.

    Just take it about 20 mins before you start camming and it'll creep up on you that, hey, camming and making some moolah isn't such a daunting prospect anymore.

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  46. #925
    Veteran Member ivybunny's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JaneBurgess View Post
    Ativan is the exact same kind of drug as Xanax. It kicks in fast and takes hours to leave your system, I have a script for it, 1 mg pills but I cut them in half or I pass out. I only take it as needed because it makes me loopy and man do I sleep at night on a day I need it. I dont recommend anyone take a Benzo unless its as needed and you really need it. They are highly addictive and I mean highly. Ive only taken 1 in two months
    While I totally agree with it being very VERY addictive (I had a problem with it years ago), I just wanna say that this comment was supposed to be in tandem with the one right before it, where I say that the balance is really important. What I didn't mention (since everyone has diff resistances to drugs) was that I myself had the lowest dosage of Ativan (1mg) and second lowest of Xanax (0.5mg) and ALWAYS broke it in half if not quarters, unless I was having a panic attack/flashback.

    They are very similar - Xanax, Ativan, and Valium are all benzos - but the intensity and half-life have some variation. And especially if MF has assault related flashbacks AND anxiety/depression, I feel like Ativan is the way to go in this respect if there isn't quite the social and financial safety net to a) make sure addiction become a problem and b) allow mental health to come before working. 20 minutes is a great amount of time to wait if you're doing a VERY low dosage that will relax you JUST enough to get on cam but not make you too loopy to perform. In fact, it'll help, as it acts along the same pathways as alcohol, but like booze, a little will loosen you up like right before a performance or interview, but a little more will make you sloppy. Especially if Valium is already prescribed, I just wanted to give an alternative that worked well for me in a very similar situation if for whatever V didn't react well.

    It's all just well-meaning advice, and like everything else I post on this forum, not something I insist is the end all be all. It's something to keep in mind and consider looking into at best, but I encourage everyone to do your own research, ask professionals before going forward. And if you disagree, I welcome it! I'm an agonist, I think struggle is the best way to get the most complete information and perspectives.


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