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Thread: Am I too idealistic?

  1. #26
    Featured Member Tourdefranzia's Avatar
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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    1. Sex addiction does not exist. It's an excuse celebs and politicians for making bad decisions.

    2. Relationships are HARD when you are a sex worker. My S.O. is the most liberal and understanding man on the planet, and he has issues with my job from time to time. You need to make a rule that no friends/boyfriends are allowed in your club. Ever. If he is giving you a ride, he can wait for you outside. Also, the less he knows about what actually goes on in the club, the better. He doesn't need all the dirty details. Share your frustrations and triumphs here in the last shift thread.

    3. You're friend who is giving you helpful advice doesn't know what he's talking about. Sure, bad stuff happens when you are a stripper. But it also happens when you work in retail or as a waitress or as a secretary. If you stay sober and professional, this will go a very long way to not getting caught up in the crappy side of the business. Also, it's ok to be friendly, but making friends is a bad idea. Everyone is your business competition. They aren't your friends.

    ETA: Do not get romantically involved with anyone you meet at work. This ends in disaster 99.9% of the time.

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    Senior Member Nikatrina Fury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    I meant to say sexual compulsion, and it does exist. All behavioral addiction and compulsions exist even if it's not a substance addiction.

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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    So, conclusively, if you prefer to buy into all of the atrocious misconceptions and blatant lies that are perpetuated about this industry--maybe it's not for you?

    Also, where exactly did you get the idea that DC clubs are unsafe? I freely admit they suck balls financially because the stage-only setup is antiquated--but that doesn't mean the clubs themselves are unsafe or terrible places.

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    Banned Aniela's Avatar
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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by MyButter View Post
    So, conclusively, if you prefer to buy into all of the atrocious misconceptions and blatant lies that are perpetuated about this industry--maybe it's not for you?

    Also, where exactly did you get the idea that DC clubs are unsafe? I freely admit they suck balls financially because the stage-only setup is antiquated--but that doesn't mean the clubs themselves are unsafe or terrible places.
    Agree strongly on both of these points. Have you started dancing yet, OP? If not, don't let this ignorant wanker dissuade you. However, if you are going to get butthurt over a bunch of experienced strippers telling you that your buddy is full of shit, then maybe you should rethink dancing.

    Also, given that DC clubs generally don't do private dances, their setup really does not allow customers to get away w/ much. If Cloakroom was still open I would recommend that club, on all fronts -- financially & in how mgmt staff take care of the girls. But if you go look at the other clubs there, everything is out on the floor. There will be guys everywhere looking to try shit, but the culture of DC does a fair bit to minimalise that bc every1 knows it is no contact.

    I have found just as many junkies in my restaurant jobs as in my club jobs. It's not that there is more drug/alcohol abuse among dancers, they are simply more open abt it.

    Finally, your friend claiming to give you his 'insight' based on a 'customer perspective': have you considered just what kind of customer is so solidly 'knowlegeable' abt the 'fact' that strippers all get stabbed, raped, pimped out? Just smtg to think abt.

  6. #30
    Veteran Member ~*SwanPrincess*~'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    I feel like all the things your friend is saying are the kind of things people who just buy into society's stereotypes about dancers say. It's like the textbook generic ignorant thing for people to say.
    You definitely don't have to be "street." And all that stuff he said about not marrying a good guy is bullshit. Not every guy is a judge mental asshole.

    I would take everything he tells you about the sex industry with a grain of salt. It's clear he had no clue what he's talking about.

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    Senior Member Nikatrina Fury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by MyButter View Post
    So, conclusively, if you prefer to buy into all of the atrocious misconceptions and blatant lies that are perpetuated about this industry--maybe it's not for you?

    Also, where exactly did you get the idea that DC clubs are unsafe? I freely admit they suck balls financially because the stage-only setup is antiquated--but that doesn't mean the clubs themselves are unsafe or terrible places.
    Excuse me, but a compulsion is anything that affects other areas of your life negatively more than you want it to. People can have a shopping compulsion or even watch their favorite TV shows too much. I think that having unprotected sex would qualify as a sexual compulsion and an obsession with pornography could make someone overly perfectionist when he starts expecting his gf to squirt on command when she's not trained to do so.
    "Fear is temporary. Regret is forever."--Unknown


  9. #32
    Featured Member Naida's Avatar
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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    Maybe I'm missing something, but how the hell is this addiction/compulsion issue even relevant to your original post?
    Exotic dancing is like any other job.
    If you work in an office, you wear dress shoes and a suit.
    If you work in a restaraunt, you wear skid resistant shoes and a uniform.
    If you work in a strip club, you wear 7" stilettos and lycra g-strings.

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  11. #33
    Senior Member Nikatrina Fury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by Naida View Post
    Maybe I'm missing something, but how the hell is this addiction/compulsion issue even relevant to your original post?
    It's not. Just getting sidetracked by some comments.
    "Fear is temporary. Regret is forever."--Unknown


  12. #34
    Featured Member Nina_'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by Nikatrina Fury View Post
    I was talking to a friend who knows more about the sex industry than I do. He said he can't see me as a stripper. I'm not street enough. It's a rough environment. I could get stabbed, raped, etc. No decent man would want to be my husband, let alone the father of my children. Etc. etc. etc. Am I being too naive and idealistic? Do I need to take off my rose-colored glasses and get the stars out of my eyes. Feel free to tell me about worst case scenarios. Perhaps I need to drill it into myself that what I want is not really what I want.
    You don't have to be "street" to be a stripper. There are strippers from all walks of life. Yes, you have to be smart and mentally strong, but those are characteristics that you need to be "street" to have.

    As long as you aren't working at a sketchy club or being sketchy while working, the chances of you getting stabbed or raped are slim to none. Clubs have security for a reason. Work at a decent club and be smart and you shouldn't have to worry about getting stabbed or raped.

    "No decent man would want to be your husband" is just silly. For one, YOU define who is a "decent man" to you, not the idiot who told you all this bullshit. I've met plenty of decent men and told them I'm a stripper and not one has minded. Some men are close minded but you'll meet plenty who don't mind that you're a stripper, or who will look past it none the less.

    It's just a job. Do it the right way and you'll be OK.
    "Rather have my feet hurting than my pockets."

  13. #35
    God/dess justanothercamgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Am I too idealistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by Nikatrina Fury View Post
    Dude, please stop bashing on my friend. He's one of the few people I'd tell and he's all like "if this is what you want to do all the power to you." I apologize for wording it wrong.
    If you have troubles not taking other people's strong opinions on a message board to heart --- you might want to rethink working in the adult industry. It requires a very thick skin.

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