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Thread: Married?

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    Senior Member Nikatrina Fury's Avatar
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    Default Married?

    Who here has a husband? How did they find out about your profession? Were they cool with it? Are they cool with it now? Do you have kids together? Please share.
    "Fear is temporary. Regret is forever."--Unknown


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    Default Re: Married?

    I dunno about anyone married. It does work and being a stripper doesn't mean no man is ever going to want you. I think too many girls have that low self esteem that guys want a "good-girl" whatever that is. I dated a guy for nearly two years, he was cool with me dancing but he refused to come into the club. He didn't want to know and he didn't want me to tell him. Of course I was completely faithful to him. Anyway that's a long story. The way you should tell him is that it is what it is. If you plan on only doing it until you get through school or something, then tell him. If you love it and will keep doing it as long as you can, then tell him that but don't treat it as something taboo. You dance for the money which is a hell of a lot more than working at applebees or something like that. Give him a take it or leave attitude. This is me, I'm a dancer. If you're cool then we're cool if you're not, then keep walking.

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    Default Re: Married?

    Yes, very happily, and my husband is from a culture that is pretty forgiving about dancing. He knew about it before we got married, and it never upset him at all. We speak openly and freely about it, it doesn't cause any rift in our relationship. We do not have any children, and do not plan to.

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    Default Re: Married?

    Was married before I started dancing, was married while I was dancing and still married after retiring from dancing. The only concern my husband had was for my safety, once I reassured him that the club had high integrity, the bouncers were great and I was walked to my car he relaxed.
    He has never been in the club when i'm working but did come with me when i was checking clubs out to to start in. He never came in when i worked, i never mixed work with social life so although I occasionally went to things with the girls from the club i didn't really socialise with them. Having 3 kids at the time also had a lot to do with that, i wanted to spend my waking hours with my family.
    He knew I enjoyed what I did, why I did it and so forth and fully supported me, in all aspects, and fully supported me when I wanted to throw it in. That is how our relationship is I fully support him in his endeavors, he fully supports me and if there is an issue we discuss it and find a solution we are both agreeable to.

    He even told his parents to jam their heads up their bums when they found out I was working in a stripclub and freaked on about it (they are old fashioned and never liked me anyway).
    My husband rocks thats why we've been together for 20 years and still going strong.

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    Default Re: Married?

    @emstar, wow, that's awesome! That's an inspiration to us all. @Vackra, what kind of culture are you talking about?
    "Fear is temporary. Regret is forever."--Unknown


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    Default Re: Married?

    I will chime in because while technically he is still just "boyfriend", we decided that marriage/kids are happening.

    To answer your question... he found out because I told him about it. We were close friends for several years and I ended up telling him one night. He was just like "Really? When have you been doing this? Why didn't I know?!" Didn't phase him. When we got together, he was mostly concerned for my safety; as long as I work in a club with decent bouncers he doesn't worry. He says it crosses his mind less often than you'd think; if I'm at work, he just thinks "She's at work" like any other job, not "Oh my God she's grinding up on other guys". It also really helps that he knows it's about the money and the schedule for me, and that it's not a desire for attention or anything else; it's strictly business.

    Boyfriends/husbands are a matter of how you (and they) handle their runaway imaginations a lot of the time. If a guy can get a lockdown on his imagination and keep it under control, and you come home and express enough affection to him that he knows you're not looking to cheat on him, it makes it a LOT easier. Just my 2 cents.
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    Default Re: Married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Nikatrina Fury View Post
    @emstar, wow, that's awesome! That's an inspiration to us all. @Vackra, what kind of culture are you talking about?
    Small Eastern European country.

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    Default Re: Married?

    I think all you can do is really be honest-- there's nothing worse than lying about it and having it come out in a bad way. One of my escorting friends had her profile found by her boyfriend's friend and he was FURIOUS, I don't think he would have been as mad if he hadn't know, not only did she betray him by lying but it was probably humiliating for his friend to find her, considering he didn't even know!

    I just started dating someone and in all my years of dancing he is the first person to be totally OK with it, most of the guys I dated were OK with it in the beginning but there was always this sense of it needing to be kept private, sort of don't-ask-don't tell-- and then later on things blew up. This guy does not give a shit about dancing or escorting. I couldn't find anyone to be my safe-call on Saturday night so I asked him to do it and he was totally fine to do it. When I asked him about it he said he didn't care because it was just meaningless sex and I obviously don't care about my clients, it would only bother him if I liked them. And I think it's also an ego boost that men pay to be with me and he gets me to be with him for free! I think either have that emotional maturity to understand the difference between your relationship with them and your relationship with customers or they don't.

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    Senior Member skripper's Avatar
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    Default Re: Married?

    Married..met him in the strip club. We're expecting our first in march. He's fine with it as long as I'm not getting groped or flashing pussy.

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    Default Re: Married?

    Yup I was married when I danced. What do you mean how'd he find out? Because I'd suggest being pretty damn honest from the get go. If they can't handle it it's better to know BEFORE you marry the moron...
    Sorry I missed church. I was too busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian.

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    Default Re: Married?

    Not wanting to cause a 'distraction', but these days getting married can trigger a number of financial 'marriage penalties' if the husband and wife have similar income levels ... from income taxes to health insurance costs and taxes. See and . Given the typical income levels for dancers and camgirls, this is probably something worth researching.

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    Default Re: Married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Melonie View Post
    Not wanting to cause a 'distraction', but these days getting married can trigger a number of financial 'marriage penalties' if the husband and wife have similar income levels ... from income taxes to health insurance costs and taxes. See http://money.usnews.com/money/blogs/...-will-cost-you and http://finance.yahoo.com/blogs/daily...171713602.html . Given the typical income levels for dancers and camgirls, this is probably something worth researching.
    This is true, this is why my LTR is not at marriage-official yet.

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    Default Re: Married?

    Oh, that wouldn't apply to me. I don't ever intend on filing jointly. If he can't take care of his own expenses, it ain't gonna work anyhow.
    "Fear is temporary. Regret is forever."--Unknown


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    Default Re: Married?

    ^^^ it still applies NF ... the effective tax rates for 'married filing separately' or 'married filing jointly' ( with both partners having near equal income levels ) are now significantly higher than the effective tax rates for 'single' filers !!! Once you are issued that marriage license, you can no longer file as 'single'.

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    Default Re: Married?

    I'm married and 99% of the time we have a great relationship. We have a 15 month old boy together. I was a dancer when we met and my husband was fine with it...I went back to dancing last May(?) I think after almost 2 years off and at first he was really pissy about it. Ironically he has a weird fetish (if that's the right word) where he gets jealous, yet it turns him on...When I am dancing we bicker a little more than usual but the sex is AMAZING.

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    Default Re: Married?

    I recently got married (this past week actually) but my husband knew of my past and what I used to do before when we were just dating. We didn't get together until after I already started my break from camming, so at first when I told him he wasn't too comfortable picturing me getting off while random dudes are watching.. Funny thing is HE'S the one that brought it up after we got married asking if it was something I wanted to get back into, considering I'm moving states to be with him and won't have any income. So now he's okay with it, but we do have boundaries. but i like it that way. He's mostly concerned with my safety above anything else. Honesty and communication will go far.. We don't have any kids, so I'm not sure how that would affect me working when we do.. I haven't actually streamed or gotten back online yet, but I am starting fresh again this week so we'll see how he handles everything once I'm actually back in

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    Senior Member Nikatrina Fury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Married?

    I'm not married...yet, but I have to say I love my bf to pieces. He's absolutely cool with me pursuing my dreams. It's funny. The only things we do argue about has nothing to do with that and more to do with miscommunication/communication styles. I can see us getting married further down the road. It's great to have your cake and eat it too. Power to the married strippers!
    "Fear is temporary. Regret is forever."--Unknown


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    Default Re: Married?

    Married. One kid. Danced for seven years. Started stripping after we got married. he likes having a stripper wife.
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    Default Re: Married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Nikatrina Fury View Post
    I'm not married...yet, but I have to say I love my bf to pieces. He's absolutely cool with me pursuing my dreams. It's funny. The only things we do argue about has nothing to do with that and more to do with miscommunication/communication styles. I can see us getting married further down the road. It's great to have your cake and eat it too. Power to the married strippers!
    Haha! Nevermind. I'm now at the point where I'm saving all documentation I can in case I need a restraining order. Then there was something about him telling me he'll cheat on me because I refuse to shave for him and him saying hair on a woman reminds him of a rabid rodent. Just forget everything I said about him.
    "Fear is temporary. Regret is forever."--Unknown


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