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Thread: Does your SO use web cams?

  1. #1
    Veteran Member MessyChick's Avatar
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    Angry Does your SO use web cams?

    Sorry if this is in the wrong bit but I'm interested in others thoughts

    i dabbled in web camming and was going to get back in to it, i quit because my bf was jealous, he started to realise it was just a job and we started setting up my account again... And thats when i found his profile....


    the the whole time he made me feel awful for doing a few shows he was paying other girls forshows. i made him give me the password and he has literally spent hundreds and hundreds. He had also contacted girls to come over while i was at work, but judging from the messages this never happened.

    Obviously the lying is wrong and making me feel bad is wrong, he said he has used it as stress relief because he hasnt been happy but struggled to tell me.

    Ignoring that for a bit, do i really have any right to feel as gutted and upset as i do? I feel physically sick thinking about it. Am i just a silly hypocrite? :/ so hard to talk to real life friends about this. He has deleted his profile now and i cant bear to look on the site as it makes me feel so angry and jealous, I'm also gutted because i was looking forward to working from home and being able to pick my kids up from school again! :/

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    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    Of course he made you feel guilty about it, bc he was being a lying sneaky fkr behind your back. It's what liars/cheaters do. They guilt trip you.

    Don't let him win. Do your cam work and dump his ass.

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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    HE'S the hypocrite for making you feel so bad about it! Do NOT let him justify it. It's just wrong.

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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    "Some women choose to follow men, and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you're wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn't love you anymore."


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    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    Quote Originally Posted by hellkitty View Post
    "Some women choose to follow men, and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you're wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn't love you anymore."
    Amen..

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    Featured Member wednesday86's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    You're doing a JOB and bringing money in and you were open and honest with him about what you were doing. He went behind your back and spent money that should go to you and the kids. No, you are not a hypocrite. My husband goes to strip clubs with his friends sometimes and even gets an LD from another dancer on occasion. As long as he's open and honest with me and respects our boundaries I don't care. If he was going behind my back and spending tons of $ on other strippers, we would have a problem. You're rightfully upset. Fuck that guy. Make your money and get a new one.

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  10. #7
    God/dess audritwo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    My husband does join into gold shows with our customer account, because he masturbates like any other normal person. I understand sometimes he rather jerk off then have sex, because time or I'm working or doesn't feel like having sex. But if he ever spent hundreds of our hard earned money because of stress relief. Let alone telling these girls how he wants to meet these cammodels, I'd fucking destroy him. Fantasy is one thing, but that is emotional cheating.

    Quiet frankly its quiet hypocritical of him. I understand he was hurt with jealousy. Not everyone is comfortable with their partner with camming. It really does take a lot. This was on him. Hindsight, he should of came to you when he had any problems and talked to you like an adult.

    There is nothing wrong with feeling betrayed. You shouldn't have to justify your feelings right now. He needs to make it up to you. He needs to understand how bad he hurt you and how he ruined something that was so important to you. You should sit him down say tell him everything. Tell him not to speak until you are finished and when he does don't argue with the way you feel, then he can do the same. Try not to scream or raise your voice. It is okay to cry, because it's normal.

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    Senior Member DDuckworth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    Quote Originally Posted by MessyChick View Post
    Sorry if this is in the wrong bit but I'm interested in others thoughts

    i dabbled in web camming and was going to get back in to it, i quit because my bf was jealous, he started to realise it was just a job and we started setting up my account again... And thats when i found his profile....


    the the whole time he made me feel awful for doing a few shows he was paying other girls forshows. i made him give me the password and he has literally spent hundreds and hundreds. He had also contacted girls to come over while i was at work, but judging from the messages this never happened.

    Obviously the lying is wrong and making me feel bad is wrong, he said he has used it as stress relief because he hasnt been happy but struggled to tell me.

    Ignoring that for a bit, do i really have any right to feel as gutted and upset as i do? I feel physically sick thinking about it. Am i just a silly hypocrite? :/ so hard to talk to real life friends about this. He has deleted his profile now and i cant bear to look on the site as it makes me feel so angry and jealous, I'm also gutted because i was looking forward to working from home and being able to pick my kids up from school again! :/
    Okay I could have stood up for him a little if he was just paying for other shows, but inviting them over!?!! Holy shit I can't believe you're still with this guy, give him the bye bye now or you'll regret it later. He WILL cheat on you given the oppurtunity, and he IS looking for the opportunity. If he never cheats on you but it was only because he couldn't get any, is that someone you want to be with?! Please don't stay with this guy, I promise you'll regret it.

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    Member tantra4's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    He won't let you cam because he's jealous, meanwhile he's spending time on cam sites and trying to hookup with camgirls? I'm so sorry, I don't think so.

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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    Oh hell no. I'd divorce my husband over this.

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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    I don't really think this is a webcam issue. The main issue really is that he was trying to contact women over the internet to come over and cheat on your while you were working.

    Whether or not he met them on a cam site is a moot point. The fact that he deceived you and would of cheated on you given half the chance should have you packing up his stuff and kicking him out the door.

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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    It was a cam site that also has call girls. He was trying to get call girls over

    We are still together. I know it sounds awful but i cant be single til I'm out of debt, i have kids to feed. I go through phases of being 'ok' with it and then being repulsed by him :/ I'm not camming at the moment, I'm working 9-5

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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    It was a cam site that also has call girls. He was trying to get call girls over

    We are still together. I know it sounds awful but i cant be single til I'm out of debt, i have kids to feed. I go through phases of being 'ok' with it and then being repulsed by him :/ I'm not camming at the moment, I'm working 9-5

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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    The first chance you get, I hope you leave his sorry ass. No offense to you.

    After my last ex, I have this strong hate/dislike/can'tfuckingstand/whateveryouwanttocall it for men (and women) that cheat on their significant other. Even if, technically, he didn't stick his dick in another woman - the intention was there. I was with my ex for 4 loooong years which I highly regret everyday who cheated on me ever chance he got. He was never caught in the act of sleeping with the women he was talking to inappropriately but telling someone to come over, talk about fucking, saying I love you and all that is still an emotional betrayal that can affect you for the rest of your life the longer you stay. Believe me, I'm still dealing with it to this day with my husband who is the love of my life and has never done anything to me to make me not trust him. It was the ex who made me have a lack of trust with deep emotional scars and have such low self esteem as if it was my fault he was a the lying, cheating scumbag he was.

    It is just not healthy and I just never want to see anyone else go through such a crappy situation. You and your kids deserve better and I hope you know that.

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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    Omg girl, he was trying to cheat on you and would have if any of these call girls/cam girls would have came over. You're ok with that????

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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    Just leaving someone when there are children involved is not always so easy. Unless someone here is volunteering to pay for her kids' housing, diapers, formula, other food, transportation, clothes, home utilities, etc., then I think we need to assume that MC knows what is best for her and her children at the moment. If he was abusing her and/or the kids then that would be another thing as personal safety has to trump all else, but that's not the case here. I have a lot of respect for the strength of character that it takes to gut it out for the sake of her kids' well-being. Hopefully she will soon be able to position herself to make a move that doesn't put her kids' well-being at risk.

    MC, good luck with everything and I hope that you are able to cut this asshole out sooner rather than later. You sound like a good mother and you deserve better than a guy who invites call girls into your own home.
    Last edited by rickdugan; 09-23-2014 at 07:50 AM.

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    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    Quote Originally Posted by MessyChick View Post
    It was a cam site that also has call girls. He was trying to get call girls over

    We are still together. I know it sounds awful but i cant be single til I'm out of debt, i have kids to feed. I go through phases of being 'ok' with it and then being repulsed by him :/ I'm not camming at the moment, I'm working 9-5
    I understand the financial part, BUT it is NEVER ok to accept this unhealthy behavior. Keep your options open to meet other men. Hopefully, you will meet a really great guy who will take over your shitty SO! Taking care of you and your babies. Never know.

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    Veteran Member LexiConn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    My ex did this exact same shit.

    He actually originally suggested I start camming, he knew I was a dancer and comfortable with sex work so I went ahead and started. VERY soon after he started getting jealous, he would watch me in free chat from another room and PM me telling me what to do, he even set up a fucking screenshot thing so he could remotely view MY screen from his computer or even his phone. Finally the last straw was finding out he'd spent hundreds of dollars (he wasn't working at this point btw) on another camgirl and had also bought her hundreds of dollars of gifts off of her Amazon. Of course when I asked him about it he turned it around on me, said I didn't give him enough attention (he was a sex addict and "needed" sex 3+ times a day or would get moody and irritable). Said that of all people I should be more understanding. Said he was sorry, wouldn't do it again, blah blah blah, did it again less than a month later, another several hundred dollars.

    Needless to say there was a lot of other messed up shit going on so I finally did leave him and have not regretted it for a single second.

    Long story short you don't need to deal with that, you just do not. NO. NO NO NO.

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    Veteran Member LexiConn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does your SO use web cams?

    Also I have three kids and lived in a hotel for three months while I danced my way into buying my own place after I left his ass. You can do it.

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