I have been in the industry for about 2 years and a half now. I started with stripping and eventually moved to body rubs, this is what I have mainly been doing lately. The last few months were great for me monetarily speaking but I'm starting to feel really burned out.
I have never really taken time off, except the occasional nights off when I had to study for midterms or finals. I always had a vanilla job but quit last fall to completely focus on school. The job I currently have is my main source of income and I cut down my shifts to one day (12 hrs) per week but I still think it's too much. I feel like I can't handle this anymore, I also worked full-time (4 days per week) during the summer even though I was feeling burnt, I pushed through. I haven't had an entire week off in 4 years.
I have been feeling so depressed at the thought of going to work the past couple of weeks. Last week I woke up in the morning at 7 and cried because I dreaded going to work and right now I am at work but I really want to leave. I don't feel good and I'm having a lot of negative thoughts.
I decided to take the next 2 weeks off and I am thinking of finding a new job... But part of me is scared. I am afraid of returning to the vanilla world after 1 year working solely in the sex industry. I have to update my resume, make applications and go through interviews. I can't work more than 10-15 hrs per week, which means I will be living with less than $200 per week. Right now I can make rent and a little more in one day. :/ I don't feel like I am ready to go back to the "real world" but at the same time, I don't want to do this anymore. I want to stop having to lead a double life.
I feel stuck and I don't know what to do. I have money saved but I don't want to live off my savings and be without a job for several months.
What are your thoughts? Have you ever been through this phase? How did you overcome it? I'm sorry the post was so long...I have been keeping this to myself and I don't really have anyone to talk to about it.



I have been keeping this to myself and I don't really have anyone to talk to about it.
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