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Thread: Supportive Significant Others

  1. #1
    Veteran Member HallelujahHopkins's Avatar
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    Default Supportive Significant Others

    We experience a lot of negative relationships. Abusive partners, toxic friends, insane co-workers, and angry family. I want to take a thread to talk about the people who love and trust us.

    Tell us about the person who's waiting to get the phone call that you made it home safe- or about the warm lump under the covers who doesn't mind being jostled when you crawl in after your 3am shift. About the person who makes fun of the idiots asking to snort coke off your ass, and makes you coffee at noon. The lover who doesn't even know what you look like in full make up but thinks you're the most divine creature they've ever laid eyes on. I'll start.

    I've got a man who work 50hrs a week and still earns less than me- and he has never been bitter about it, never begrudged me my free time or asked me to carry him financially. It's never even occurred to him to be jealous, his rule about my job is that he can't support it if it makes me sick or unhappy- otherwise my body my rules.

    He has never made me feel objectified, and will happily give me head without pressure for me to reciprocate.

    He rubs my ankles when they're swollen, and pokes my bruised knees to tease me. He makes phone calls to the landlord, or to cancel appointments, when I'm feeling too shy. He lets the cat in at 7am when I'm dead to the world. He helps my family run errands or get to the airport. He even does the fucking dishes.

    He makes the best damn scrambled eggs- like with mushrooms and spinach and butter and cheese...and brews me tea with herbs from the kitchen garden he planted.

    He researched and bought several alternative forms of menstrual cramp relief when traditional pain killers left me moaning each month.

    He doesn't judge my vices, and he doesn't allow his to come between us. He asks me for help when he's feeling overwhelmed, and helps me up when I stumble.

    I couldn't do this job half as well if I didn't know I had a loving, safe, and tranquil home to come back to at the end of a crazy night. If I didn't have my best friend to vent to about weird shit happening. If I din't have my lighthouse keeping me from dashing up against the rocks.


  2. #2
    Veteran Member SkyeSabrina's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    Thank you so much for posting this thread! Our SOs sound very similar.
    R and I started dating a little over two years ago and he has been the most caring, supportive, helpful man in my life since then. Two weeks into our relationship I decided to start dancing and he told me that he was happy as long as I was happy. He and I work the same amount of hours weekly (45-50) and despite him earning less that I do, he's never been spiteful or treated me like less than a princess. My son and R are like two peas in a pod and have been best buddies since the first time they met. I'm very lucky to have a man who is so loving and understanding to spend my life with and to have around my son as he's growing up. I think I should probably hold on to this one.
    What other man will sit there while I browse stripper clothing online for hours while rubbing my feet and listen to me complain? lol
    I'm very glad that you started this thread and I look forward to reading about everyone's awesome SOs.
    Last edited by SkyeSabrina; 09-25-2014 at 10:46 AM.

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    Veteran Member SexxiLexxi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    I'm SO glad you created this thread.

    At first, my hubby was very against being a cam girl but we discussed it. He expressed his concerns and we had a very deep discussion that made us that much closer.

    It actually took me a bit to come to him even after knowing each other 13 years and being together for nearly 4 BUT I'm so glad I did. He truly is the love of my life and I wouldn't know what I would do without him

    I have been having a very hard time finding a job, even part time and financial issues keep happening which can strain any relationship so I'm hoping to make my goals to be the breadwinner to give him that stress that is on his shoulders relief because he deserves it. He is an AMAZING man and I'm glad I have him. Great men seem to be few and far between nowadays as I see my sister go through men like underwear to only end up heartbroken/hurt/left/etc.

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    God/dess ScarletKitten's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    HallelujahHopkins, your post almost got me a lil' teary-eyed! Thank you so much for writing that. It made me feel more appreciation for my SO. Although my SO has not been making money in forever b/c of certain issues, he has been my rock.

    I've been stressed for a long, long time b/c I'm the only one who makes the money, but he helps me in so many ways. He makes me tea and coffee every day. He cooks all the meals and feeds my cat everyday. He does all the dishes and 99% of all the cleaning. He even cleans my cat's shit off the floor. He is always there for me, always sweet to me, offers me massages when I'm sore, spoons me in bed...he is also my emotional support system. He is always trying to make me happy- always! So I wouldn't even be able to function properly without him. Here's to hoping he gets a job soon (besides being my pimp of course lmao) - at least he doesn't beat me.
    "Dancing tables, making deals with devils like a drunk beauty queen"

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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    I've got that lover too, the one who tells me to sleep in and brings me coffee every chance he gets. He works hard and still gives me love when I'm complaining about a rough day even when the work I've done doesn't hold a candle to his. He helps me take photos and has literally carried me up the stairs when I can't do it myself. He got me to ease myself into this too, didn't let me jump in and make decisions I could regret later. He's confident and secure in our relationship, and as long as I keep him informed, is happy with what I decide to do <3

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    Featured Member wednesday86's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    My husband went from being supportive, to jealous when I went back to dancing, and then back to supportive. He realized that this is the only job I kind of like and that I enjoy making a lot of money. He said that as long as I'm happy, he's on board.

    He knows that (to me) there are only two men in the world-Him, and Everyone Else. (Yes I stole that line from Big Fish but it's so true.)

    I still send him selfies of myself in my sexy work outfits like I did when we were dating, and he loves it.

    When I come in at 3 or 4am and crawl under the covers, he always wraps his arms around me, kisses me and tells me he missed me.

    When he's home, he gets up early with the baby, closes the black out curtains and tucks pillows around me and puts extra blankets on me if it's cold. He takes the baby for walks, to the store, wherever and lets me sleep as long as I need to. He buys groceries and makes me lunch when I wake up. He rubs my back and my feet. He does the laundry while I'm getting my hair done.

    He tweezes my eyebrows for me when I'm too tired to go get them threaded. He gives the baby a bath, makes dinner, cleans up the house and basically does everything that I do when I'm working.

    He brings me surprise Starbucks and Dunkin Donuts when he knows I've had a rough night.

    He never makes an issue about me making more money than he does. He never asks for money for anything that we don't need, and even then I basically have to force him to take money for bills or gas because I know what he makes. He just says he doesn't want to take away from "my" money, and that I should spend it on myself, on things I want.
    I seriously have the best husband ever. <3

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    God/dess Selina M's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    Awww, this is like the cutest thread idea ever. I love it!

    My boyfriend works more hours than me and makes less, but still takes me out to dinner, buys me coffee, pays for dates, etc.
    He has so much of his own bullshit to deal with (school, work, court ordered counseling bullshit) but always makes time to hang out with/do things for me.

    If I have a bad day at work, he boils hot water (the "hot" water is not near hot enough in our apt) and pours it in the tub, brings tea or wine, and sits in the bathroom listening while I take a bubble bath and groan about my shift. When my legs ache, he takes my dog out down the 2 flights of stairs, feeds the cats, and gets out of bed to bring me whatever I need. About once a week, I come home to a spotless apartment and an exercised, happy dog.

    He never gets jealous of guys at work; tells me he missed me when I come home late; texts me during work to see how it's going.
    If I'm stressing about money (almost the entire summer!) or need to take a few days off but feel like I can't, he makes me chill out and offers to cover whatever bill is the issue. He is literally the yin to my yang in that; I'm very Type A "sky is falling" and he is all zen "everything will be fine"... and I need that sometimes.

    He helps me with school whenever he can too; he is an astrophysics major and loooves physics; I really don't have the time to devote to my physics class between work and my other classes, and I absolutely HATE it anyway... so he goes through my video lectures and explains things in his uber patient way, even when I'm sitting on the floor with my head in my hands, so frustrated that I get nearly impossible to teach.

    Yay supportive SOs! <3
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

    "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

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    Moderator Aurora_Sunset's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    Not to derail from the fuzzy feelings and stuff, but I kinda hate you all. lol jk, these are fantastic stories. I'm so happy to hear about your great guys.

    Just a wee bit jealous though
    Don't try to win over the haters. You are not the Jerk Whisperer.

    Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.






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    Veteran Member HallelujahHopkins's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    Quote Originally Posted by Aurora_Sunset View Post
    Not to derail from the fuzzy feelings and stuff, but I kinda hate you all. lol jk, these are fantastic stories. I'm so happy to hear about your great guys.

    Just a wee bit jealous though
    New dating standard "Hi, I'm sorry but this just isn't gonna work out because I can't brag about you on my stripper forum...yeah if you can't rub my feet while cooking me bacon naked and providing free therapy you're gonna have to GTFO"

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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    I love seeing someone who knows me. Calls me my real name and notices the little things. Hugs me hello and doesn't have a hidden agenda. Has met my friends and family and tells me about his. Not an so but still awesome.

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    Featured Member Cashmere Star's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    I don't know where I would be without him - he's always there for me, and goes out of his way to show that he loves me. I've never been so open and close to anyone before. We work well together because of our complementary strengths.

    He was worried about me stripping but he trusts me and says that as long as I am safe and happy, he's supportive. I am very relieved.


    Weekly earning target: $1000
    Saving for: school, traveling, rainy day fund

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    What would "future you" want you to do right now?




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    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    I'm so happy for you, HH. I'm another one of the lucky ones. We're just starting our eighth year together, and I couldn't possibly feel happier or more supported.

    I'm so glad I'm not the only one!!

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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    I love this thread!!

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    Veteran Member LexiConn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    This makes me so warm and fuzzy inside.

    My love is literally and realistically actually the best love I have ever had.

    He accepts me and loves me and embraces me exactly as I am, and supports me when I decide I want to make improvements. He also is there for me if I stumble or want to give up and reminds me of why I wanted to do what I set out to do. He is even there for me if I change my mind completely.

    He makes me feel like a goddess and a queen before we even get to bed, even more so once we're in bed, he also caters to my kinks when I just want to be a nasty little slut.

    He works hard in a hard job. He pays his own way and pays for mine, too. He's let me know that if and ever I need any help he is there for me.

    He loves that my job makes me happy and thinks I deserve every bit and more of the money I make.

    When he was still just trying to get to the point of asking to date me, he brought me coffee every day for weeks because he saw a thing I put on facebook: "Ways to my heart: 1. Buy me coffee 2. Make me coffee 3. Be coffee" lol

    One night after work he came over because I was a mess, he drew an epsom salt bath for me, then sat by the tub and held my hand while I drunk-cried, he warmed the water for me when it started to cool, this lasted for hours.

    There are a million little things, little thoughtful stuff and happy feelings he gives me. I love how supportive he is, I feel so content knowing he's at the other end of the phone and that we have a beautiful bright future ahead of us. I don't have the fears I've had with others before him and I actually know what it's like to trust someone and know deep down that he loves me, likes me, is attracted to me, cares about me and supports me. Ugh. I am so sappy right now. :'D

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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    Mine is fantastic as well. He had misgivings about dating a dancer when we first met, but the more he got to know me, the less he cared about my job.

    He texts me during my shift and, if I'm having a bad night, he's incredibly encouraging. Tells me how proud he is of me, how much he loves me. He sends me funny Facebook pics, if he knows I'm having a bad night, uplifting Bible verses (we're both religious) and is forever positive.

    I can talk about work and he never, ever gets jealous. It bothers him to hear about guys getting inappropriate with me, because he knows that I deserve better than to be treated like shit. But,he trusts me completely.

    We have an LDR and, every time I see him, there's a massage waiting for me.

    He never misses a chance to compliment me, to tell me how beautiful I am. And, when he says it, it means something to me.

    He's made a huge effort to get to know my family and spend a lot of time with them, because he knows that it's a big deal to me.

    He's as happy when I'm in sweats and no makeup watching football as he is when I'm dressed to go out. He thinks I'm sexy right after I've gotten out of the shower, looking like a wet dog.

    He loves my ragtag band of much loved, but previously unwanted, quirky pets.

    I'm going to spend the rest of my life with this man.

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    God/dess simone87's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    me and my guy have had our ups and downs, but he's a pretty amazing bf.
    he'll text me to make sure i'm doing ok at work, stay up to make sure i made it home safe, and then cook me food because he knows how starving and exhausted i am.
    we split the household bills but when i've had a bad week he'll be understanding and cover them all himself and he'll get up and take my son to school when i've worked late the night before.
    he's never, ever pressured me about quitting my job or anything to that effect. he's always the one to do the dishes and cook dinner.
    also the most faithful boyfriend i've ever had and godamn amazing in bed!

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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    My husband is amazing. I never have to ask him to do anything, house-work wise. He helps me pick out outfits. He counts my money, does all our accounting, and sets out my house fee for me every night. Any and every time he says he will do something, he does it, from the tiny to the large. On top of all this, he never complains or is jealous.

    Lovelovelove.

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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    You guys are so lucky! I have a supportive SO, but not to the extent of your men.

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    Senior Member hamdinger's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    I love my sexy sweet boyfriend. He's teaching me to drive his stick shift so I can drive myself to the club. Yesterday he came with me to try on stripper shoes and he wrapped and unwrapped all of the pairs while I wobbled around the boutique. I'm really nervous about starting, but I feel so much better knowing he's there for me.

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    Veteran Member Morrigan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    I've been with mine over a decade, married 10 years com late January- was with her years before I finally broke down and opened up about my G.D.S - since then shes been my PR person and a major major help ( and even started ) my caming life - AS WELL as my art life, and thats just the most recent. she's gone above and beyond the idea of just " supportive" more times than I can count- and its vice versa- were a team/partnership 100% and function as one unit. and from that has come nothing but strength, and the ability to tackle many many many things like money problems, mortgage scares, medical scares, being closeted etc or other situations that traditionally have been known to shatter relationships
    Hatred does not cease by hatred but only by love; this is the eternal rule.

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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    My ex-fiance was very supportive of my stripping- our thing didn't last due to his problems with PTSD (he was in the US Marines.) I will always remember him well for being there for me and NOT being a closed minded shit like most of the other men I dated...There are good guys out there.

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  40. #22
    Veteran Member DreamsInDigital's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    My boyfriend is the best! <3

    I actually met him at work, and was immediately attracted to him.....BUT he lived on the other side of the country and was only in town for one night. So I exchanged numbers with him, thinking that I'd hook up with him that night and never see him again. I ended up going home and falling asleep instead, lol FAIL.

    For the next 3 months, we texted and talked on FaceTime every night for several hours. Even before we were dating, he was always there for me, and always made me feel better when I was having a bad day. He invited me to fly out and join him on a vacation once (it would've been the first time we'd seen each other in person since we met), which I accepted. I ended up seriously injuring myself at the last minute, and couldn't go. So, he actually changed his ticket and flew to my house to take care of me instead.

    He left all his friends and family and moved across the country to be with me a few months later. He drives me to and from work at any hours, just to make sure I won't drive home after drinking. He cooks for me, looks after my dog like he's his own, and always thinks of cute ways to surprise me like buying me a favorite snack, or sending me flowers when he's out of town, "just because."

    He tells me that he loves me and that he thinks I'm beautiful every day. He travels a ton for work and tends to be really busy, but he still texts me good morning each morning, and finds time to call me almost every single day, even if it's just for a couple minutes. He takes me shopping for outfits and shoes for work, but also encourages me to focus on school as much as I need to and not worry about $$ because he will pay for anything I ever want or need.

    He's always looking out for my safety, and takes every opportunity he can to teach me basic things that will help me when he's not around - like self defense moves or even how to pick out a good piece of fruit at the grocery store, lol. He's supportive of anything I ever want to do, and can always find a way to make me smile even when I'm in the worst mood.

    I appreciate & love him so much. <3 <3 <3

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    Featured Member kaninchen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    Sometimes my boyfriend leaves the porch light on for me.

    ... I'm very happy for those of you who have such wonderful people in your life, but this thread is making me a little sad!

  43. #24
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    Quote Originally Posted by kaninchen View Post
    Sometimes my boyfriend leaves the porch light on for me.

    ... I'm very happy for those of you who have such wonderful people in your life, but this thread is making me a little sad!
    Our partners all have different ways of showing us how much they care. I happen to have a partner who loves to do things such as those described in the OP, but I personally have a very different way of showing my affection. I'm the type who will remind him to drink a glass of water or eat a salad. I communicate my love through concern for his health (i.e. nurturing) rather than by giving gifts or similar 'fun' expressions of love. Hey, whatever I do seems to work for him, so I'm not wasting any time feeling guilty about it. We celebrate our differences.

    There's a book out there that might help you identify the love language your specific partner 'speaks': http://www.amazon.com/Love-Languages...love+languages

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    Default Re: Supportive Significant Others

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    There's a book out there that might help you identify the love language your specific partner 'speaks': http://www.amazon.com/Love-Languages...love+languages
    There are several versions of this book out now, I have the one for singles (my mom got it for me...) and I loved it.
    "There are different kinds of darkness. There is darkness that frightens, the darkness that soothes, the darkness that is restful. There is the darkness of lovers, and the darkness of assassins. It becomes what the bearer wishes it to be, needs it to be. It is not wholly bad or good."
    - The Court of Mist and Fury

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