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Thread: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

  1. #26
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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    I think the same things Tasha said.
    I have lost sleep over things customers said to me in vanilla jobs, even things that happened over 4 years ago. That's issues. I've never lost sleep because of something some guy said to me on cam. I enjoy being naked, I love talking about sex and sexual things with people that is fun to me. I love being bitchy- I can do that on cam. I can't be a bitch and expect to get somewhere in a vanilla job. I love being on the computer and the internet. I love wear lingerie and kinky clothing. I love learning about fetishes and what is alluring for other people. I find all aspects of sexuality fascinating. When I was a teen it was just as normal to hangout on chat rooms/ msn/aim/stickam and have a webcam chat as it was to hangout in person. It feels natural to me. As for working at home and being a hermit, I'm a homebody anyway. Honestly for living in Canada, it is so fucking cold I hate going to a workplace. I have to put on a million layers of clothes stand outside freezing my ass off. What could be better than working in my warm bed at home? Lol. I hate my town I can't wait to move again, it is too small with nothing going on and nobody my age. All my friends live scattered across the country so I talk to them on skype or text. I'm a private person naturally, I don't have a lot of real life friends, and I don't want a lot. I think everything that comes with this job is ideal for me. When I worked retail and service industry, it was hell. There were a few fun moments but most people don't realize how hard those workers have it. Can camming be exhausting? Fuck yeah, but at the end of the day, for me, I'd rather bust my ass to make $100/hr doing things I enjoy, than bust my ass to make $10/hr and feel like a stinky pos. Feel me? This comes back to *is camming degrading to you* And for me it's not, camming is empowering

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  3. #27
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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    The only two things I can say that camming has "damaged" for me, and definitely wouldn't call these things "self damaging":

    1. I will never, ever be able to work a "normal" job because the pay would never come close to being worth it. This makes it where I'm either stuck being a cam girl until I die, or I have to plan carefully for retirement. I plan on doing the planning for retirement route.

    2. I used to think that people were overall good natured, that deep down everyone was a good person with good intentions. Now, I feel the opposite. I feel like deep down, everyone is self serving and manipulative. The internet brings out the worst in people. When they feel like they can be completely anonymous they let their true colors shine and more often than not, it's not pretty. This obviously applies a lot more to my perception on men than on women. I don't know that I feel entirely the same about women, although I have met a lot of nasty manipulative women in this industry too. But in regards to men, it saddens me to see the true side of a large population of men. How they act on the internet I think reveals their true colors, and even more so how they choose to treat sex workers tells a lot about them as people. And it's not just the guys who are obviously pieces of shit just that you can tell just by walking past them on the street. There are some "upstanding" men who live their lives like they are these great men who are so respectable and accomplished, yet get them behind closed doors and they are absolute animals with no regard for women. I'm just glad I already have a husband who is great to me, or I would swear off men for the rest of my life.

    So yah. Self damaging? No. Eye opening, definitely.

    I don't think it's self damaging to me because I am able to separate my work from my life. I don't take things that are said to me or how I am treated personally. Sure, I get really frustrated and irritated with the mentality of a lot of these men that frequent cam sites, but I don't take it personal. My job is being a cam girl, but I am not a cam girl. If that makes sense. I didn't become a hermit, although I am already one by nature. I haven't become more of one or lost any social interaction that I already had. This might be because I have kids so it's nearly impossible for me to shut myself off from the world.

    You can live a completely "normal" life being a cam girl. People would never guess I'm a cam girl, and they are surprised when/if they find out because it's such a contrast from how I live my life. You don't have to BECOME this job to be successful in it.

    I really think if this job is self damaging for someone, they shouldn't be doing it. You can't allow this job to get inside your head that much, or take things personal, because if you do you will end up feeling well... damaged.

    I think the big difference here is going to end up being WHY you got into camming. If you got into this job because you really wanted to, you were interested in it, and you were not desperate for money, I think the chances of feeling damaged is going to be a lot less. If you got into this job out of desperation or because you felt like you had no other options, you probably are more likely to feel damaged. It seems to be, from what I have seen, that women who hate on the sex industry while in it or when they get out of it, are always the ones who felt desperate going in.
    Last edited by SarahTime; 09-25-2014 at 11:35 AM.
    xoxo ~ Sarah





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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    NO. Camming has given me a new sense of confidence and self-acceptance. I used to care so much about what people say or think about me. I no longer need others approval and validation in order for me to feel good about myself. I now know my worth and who I am, just as I am is enough.

    As for men, I do see them in a different light until it's proven otherwise. I see it as a gift, the ability to see through people and detect bullshit... with a smile
    #stepyourpussyup

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Quote Originally Posted by TheBrownFox View Post
    When I was a kid, I wanted so badly to become a grown up. And now I realize...kids just don't know how good they've got it. LOL.
    I feel so INSANE for being jealous of children and their cush lives LOL

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    I think that in some cases it can be self damaging, but it depends on who you are. I am by nature a sexual deviant and there is something very dark and animalistic at the center of my being that has to do with my perception of sensuality and sex. not sure why i am like this, but it is what it is. Camming helps me to express this side of myself and that is why I think it has been the most natural feeling career choice over all the others I have tried.

    It has in a way made me less sociable, but that's only because you have to constantly be online to keep your regs and your profit margins up. In terms of sex though, I've never really enjoyed it and now i enjoy it even less, but i am waiting for the right guy to come along and coax enjoyment out of me again.

    This forum however has been instrumental in making sure that camming isn't damaging to me. I think if I didn't have anyone to talk to I would be very lonely and it would drive me crazy. Love you ladies truly!

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Not at all! I'm a more confident person now, which in turn makes me more social and less awkward in public situations (I'm very introverted). I feel like my eyes have been opened to different types of sexuality and I'm now much more open-minded and able to enjoy (or at least appreciate) fetishes that I'd never given any thought to before. Being on MFC means I talk a lot of the same guys every night, and really get to know them as people. These are people I would never have given a second glance to IRL, let alone talked to. I'm proud of myself for having business sense and being able to keep myself motivated in this career. I love what I do and I love what it brings out in me.

  11. #32
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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Short answer: no
    Long answer: fuck no!

    I am so happy to have found this job. If anything, I am significantly less damaged than before!
    "Do you do tech support in exclusive?"

    Don't call me BB...I'm not the prime minister of Israel!



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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Quote Originally Posted by anonymous camgirl View Post
    I think it is not so bad if you have a large social outlet, maybe lots of family , friends and a boyfriend.. if you have NONE of that which I don't .. it's pretty damaging... .. People IRL is key.

    People you can feel supported, loved and cared by... Kinda hard to work online all day with guys who don't care when no one cares IRL either.
    I just want to hug you.

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    I feel the same way.. and DEAD people.. dead people have no worries.. I know.. it's weird.. but I am jealous of dead people...


    Quote Originally Posted by pinkpink View Post
    I feel so INSANE for being jealous of children and their cush lives LOL

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Quote Originally Posted by anonymous camgirl View Post
    I feel the same way.. and DEAD people.. dead people have no worries.. I know.. it's weird.. but I am jealous of dead people...
    I'll drink to that my dear!

    Let's not forget dogs they are just happy to have food and toys....oh the life

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    oh yes!.. jealous of housepets too.. REAL jealous.. sorry ya'll can have your feminism.. I want a hubby to go work his ass off while I sit at home doing the laundry.. I used to be that woman at the wrong time in my life.. 16-21.. when of course I didn't appreciate it.. I didn't have a care in the world. it was his problem to make money not mine...lol.... jealous of stay at home people too.. so jealous!

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Is camming damaging?

    Through camming I have learned why I have failed so badly in my relationships with men, both in business and in my personal life. It's good in respect that it has wiped the clouds away from my eyes. It's bad because it has wiped the clouds away from my eyes. I'm not naive anymore. I no longer give credit when credit isn't earned. I pretty much don't even give credit when it is earned because post camming, I believe there's always a selfish motive behind any positive behavior. I'm much wiser, perhaps to the point of being tainted but then I question what the word "tainted" actually means. Does "tainted" mean we now have a clear view of the world we live in and are right to believe no one can be taken at face value, that everyone has an agenda, that people are self centered and will take what doesn't belong to them if given the opportunity by either begging, stealing, lying or anything I otherwise in my previous life would have considered malicious behavior, because they think they can pull it off or get away with it? Or does tainted mean we've become jaded?

    I don't even use camming to express my sexuality anymore. What I present on cam are my inner demons. I use it as psychotherapy to bash every man who has ever wronged me, and they are now in debt with me as a result. They pay me for it. They pay me to apply all of my painful experiences, to lash out, to be nasty, to be hateful, to get my revenge at this alien species called man.

    When I log off cam, the sad angry, troubled girl disappears and a healthy, happy, stable woman within returns in complete peace. The butterfly leaves her cocoon when the cam shuts off.

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  23. #38
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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Quote Originally Posted by Airrrie2 View Post
    Is camming damaging?

    Through camming I have learned why I have failed so badly in my relationships with men, both in business and in my personal life. It's good in respect that it has wiped the clouds away from my eyes. It's bad because it has wiped the clouds away from my eyes. I'm not naive anymore. I no longer give credit when credit isn't earned. I pretty much don't even give credit when it is earned because post camming, I believe there's always a selfish motive behind any positive behavior. I'm much wiser, perhaps to the point of being tainted but then I question what the word "tainted" actually means. Does "tainted" mean we now have a clear view of the world we live in and are right to believe no one can be taken at face value, that everyone has an agenda, that people are self centered and will take what doesn't belong to them if given the opportunity by either begging, stealing, lying or anything I otherwise in my previous life would have considered malicious behavior, because they think they can pull it off or get away with it? Or does tainted mean we've become jaded?

    I don't even use camming to express my sexuality anymore. What I present on cam are my inner demons. I use it as psychotherapy to bash every man who has ever wronged me, and they are now in debt with me as a result. They pay me for it. They pay me to apply all of my painful experiences, to lash out, to be nasty, to be hateful, to get my revenge at this alien species called man.

    When I log off cam, the sad angry, troubled girl disappears and a healthy, happy, stable woman within returns in complete peace. The butterfly leaves her cocoon when the cam shuts off.
    Hmmm, I'm not sure that's the proper use of the term "psychotherapy." Most psychotherapists would argue that you're not helping yourself by treating men like shit. No offense, but being a sexist bitch won't make your past go away, and hating half of the world is a ridiculous thing to do. Your behavior on cam IS real life, and your customers are real people. It's sad that you feel the need to disrespect them because of their gender.

    There was a man-hating thread a while back that really reinforced the sex-worker stereotype...of hating men. I know we're a community of women here, but ffs I'm getting tired of this shit on here.
    "Do you do tech support in exclusive?"

    Don't call me BB...I'm not the prime minister of Israel!



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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    That's the gripe for me.

    The cam girls view of men is just a little shocking really. Thankfully for my own sanity I still give men the benefit of doubt. I believe that not all men are bad and obviously we are going to see the side where all they think about is their dick, they are on a porn website, it's why they are there. You can't expect men to be a gentleman on a porn site with all the testosterone going on in his body at that precise moment.
    Men struggle to stay respectful when in a sexual environment.

    I've met assholes and I've met genuinely nice men who are respectful, kind and good hearted people. We also forget women can be assholes too.
    Plenty of women out there who cheat all the time, treat their men like shit, beat them down, make them feel worthless and everything else.

    We are seeing a very different side to these men which may not be assholish in reality.

    Im young and I guess it scares me to think I could wound up hating men. These men on here dont piss me off at all, I dont feel disrespected by them and I dont think they are selfish.

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Hey beautiful. Do some meditating, join a group where you can meet people doing things you love, when you call your friends REALLY listen. Would it matter if you were doing this or working elsewhere? I gotta tell you that many jobs will make you feel damaged. I worked at a mall floor a while and I could not have become more jaded towards people or their so called needs. Camming is easier for me because I need more time to myself in a day. I do it from about 11-4, make about $100, wash off my makeup and put my character away. When I'm done I don't feel dirty. I just feel like any other job.

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    I think the only damaging part is the secrecy. It makes the person feel like they are doing something bad or wrong. In reality you're just hopping on a pretty decent entrepreneurial opportunity (as my boyfriend says, "you're not a stripper, you're an entrepreneur)

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    One of my friends works as a cashier at a large supermarket chain, and he can get written up for drinking at his register... like, drinking water, because I guess if the customer sees him acting like a human being they'll shit themselves and cry. Another friend at a clothing store got told off for leaning against the table the cash register is on--apparently if you're not at parade fucking rest for eight hours it's unprofessional. When I worked in restaurants I could get written up for saying "customer" instead of "guest", and my last manager took away our lunch breaks.

    Camming is great. Camming is wonderful. Here I can demand to be treated with courtesy and respect or I kick their asses out. I can deal with being asked if I'll fuck a dog once a week if it means I never have to throw myself in the teeth of hospitality or retail ever again.

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Quote Originally Posted by anonymous camgirl View Post
    sorry ya'll can have your feminism.. I want a hubby to go work his ass off while I sit at home doing the laundry.. I used to be that woman at the wrong time in my life.. 16-21.. when of course I didn't appreciate it.. I didn't have a care in the world. it was his problem to make money not mine...lol.... jealous of stay at home people too.. so jealous!
    The problem is since 50% of all marriages in America end in divorce that you might be able to enjoy it for a short while but then you'll be thrown out into the world again without any job skills and have to start over from scratch.

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    ^^ This. I was in that situation before I started camming. Not a hubby thankfully, just a bf, but I had no money when he left or anything. I had to rent a room in this creepy old house for like $180 a month, that was all I could afford so you can imagine what it must have been like. I worked teaching jobs and anything else I could find til I built up savings to move into a better place. I have never in my life worked so hard to save so little. before camming, the concept of saving $5000-$10000 would have never crossed my mind. Now its something that is achievable, with way less damage.

    I think that camming can be damaging if you overwork yourself or if you hate it deep down. If it unsettles some part of you it will wear away at you. But more damaging than camming is poverty, and I'd rather be a little damaged than in the gutter quite honestly. I however really like camming, so I don't think that a few years from now I will be in a psychologists office with regrets. There are however vanilla jobs that I worked where that happened.

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Quote Originally Posted by scarletl View Post
    That's the gripe for me.

    The cam girls view of men is just a little shocking really. Thankfully for my own sanity I still give men the benefit of doubt. I believe that not all men are bad and obviously we are going to see the side where all they think about is their dick, they are on a porn website, it's why they are there. You can't expect men to be a gentleman on a porn site with all the testosterone going on in his body at that precise moment.
    Men struggle to stay respectful when in a sexual environment.

    I've met assholes and I've met genuinely nice men who are respectful, kind and good hearted people. We also forget women can be assholes too.
    Plenty of women out there who cheat all the time, treat their men like shit, beat them down, make them feel worthless and everything else.

    We are seeing a very different side to these men which may not be assholish in reality.

    Im young and I guess it scares me to think I could wound up hating men. These men on here dont piss me off at all, I dont feel disrespected by them and I dont think they are selfish.
    But that's the thing for me. If this is how you treat women when you think you are anonymous or when you're raging with testosterone, that's who you really are. Sexual environment or not. And all those genuinely nice respectful men... would they act the same toward women on a cam site? Maybe. Maybe not. I've been appalled at how I've seen people act who thought they were anonymous but were not.

    And yah it goes the same for women too. We are not all innocent here.

    I don't "hate men", I just take a lot longer to trust their intentions. But then again, I'm not entirely fond of people as a whole. LOL Individuals... yes. People... no.

    Maybe it is being young, for you scarletl. I didn't always feel this way when I was younger. There is probably a lot to be said with experience in life, and in camming. At first it's all great and fun but eventually true colors start to show. Which isn't to say it is not great and fun anymore, it's just... different.
    xoxo ~ Sarah




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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Oh well JAC!.. back to camming then.. but in all seriousness.. if I met a man that I built a life with I would make sure of it that I would not have nothing.. I always been that way.. remember I have NOT had any sort of serious relationship since I was 28... and back then we were always super poor... my first relationship was spent with 1 bag of rice in the cupboard.. the kind that takes 45 mins to cook... I'll never forget looking at bare cupboards and that's all there was.. that is how most winters with this idiot went.. and then I had common sense enough to leave that one...LOL
    Quote Originally Posted by justanothercamgirl View Post
    The problem is since 50% of all marriages in America end in divorce that you might be able to enjoy it for a short while but then you'll be thrown out into the world again without any job skills and have to start over from scratch.

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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    I can totally drink to this!... but you have to be careful, everyday I have to have some kinda weirdo conversation with myself to bring myself to reality that I live in this weird fricken bubble.. does it work? Not really , cuz I don't have a real life!!.. I would love to get one but unfortunately for me I am left to chase dollars 7 days a week.. by the time I am done working I am exasperated and tired and the last thing I want to do is volunteer or go to a meetup group. Be careful of your bitter, jadedness as it repels money as I know so well.. sometimes it works.. and I make money off it.. but sometimes I wonder does it really?? Being nice makes me 5 bucks while being bitter and jaded makes me $50? doesn't make sense to me.. but I too .. am so different off cam.. i think these guys would like me off cam but that is the person i cannot show.. wanna know why?? cuz that's the girl they will not buy shows from or tip.. the FUN GIRL.. sad but unfortunate.

    Quote Originally Posted by Airrrie2 View Post
    Is camming damaging?

    Through camming I have learned why I have failed so badly in my relationships with men, both in business and in my personal life. It's good in respect that it has wiped the clouds away from my eyes. It's bad because it has wiped the clouds away from my eyes. I'm not naive anymore. I no longer give credit when credit isn't earned. I pretty much don't even give credit when it is earned because post camming, I believe there's always a selfish motive behind any positive behavior. I'm much wiser, perhaps to the point of being tainted but then I question what the word "tainted" actually means. Does "tainted" mean we now have a clear view of the world we live in and are right to believe no one can be taken at face value, that everyone has an agenda, that people are self centered and will take what doesn't belong to them if given the opportunity by either begging, stealing, lying or anything I otherwise in my previous life would have considered malicious behavior, because they think they can pull it off or get away with it? Or does tainted mean we've become jaded?

    I don't even use camming to express my sexuality anymore. What I present on cam are my inner demons. I use it as psychotherapy to bash every man who has ever wronged me, and they are now in debt with me as a result. They pay me for it. They pay me to apply all of my painful experiences, to lash out, to be nasty, to be hateful, to get my revenge at this alien species called man.

    When I log off cam, the sad angry, troubled girl disappears and a healthy, happy, stable woman within returns in complete peace. The butterfly leaves her cocoon when the cam shuts off.

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  43. #48
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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    Agreed. And you can't expect to be very successful if you absolutely loathe your customers because then you're in a weird push-pull situation of 'I hate you but I need you to survive.' You'll never be in a happy place if you hate what you're dependent on.
    I agree with this. There's a difference between hating men and knowing their intentions. I don't think anyone should get on a cam site and expect Mr. Amazing as the average customer. We have something they want, they have something we want. Intentions should be fairly clear. I think if you can accept that without hate, you should be ok. I just think it's sad that a lot of these guys treat us like such shit, and then log off and pretend they are not total assholes to the core.

    I definitely don't see how you can be successful at this while hating men. Also, maybe for some the very fact that they NEED these men to survive, fuels the hate.
    xoxo ~ Sarah




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  45. #49
    Veteran Member LilyAnderson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    I felt that way for a long time until I knocked myself out of it by getting a part time job. It got me out of the house and I was able to remember what life was like before camming.

    Now, my numbers have been going up, I'm much happier when I do cam, and I appreciate it much more then I ever did. I've also started treating it like a real job and I push myself as hard as possible to do well.
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  47. #50
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    Default Re: Do you feel camming is self damaging?

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    Agreed. And you can't expect to be very successful if you absolutely loathe your customers because then you're in a weird push-pull situation of 'I hate you but I need you to survive.' You'll never be in a happy place if you hate what you're dependent on.
    Agreed! My customers are awesome! Or I wouldn't interact with them / do this job. Being abusive to yourself by purposely & repeatedly putting yourself in situations you don't want to be in is still... abuse.

    Oh and the very, very occasional rude custy is just in the wrong room and doesn't realize it yet. Every time. The reason he is insulting or dumb is because he thinks his opinion of what I should be or do is superior, which is laughable considering we are only in control of ourselves and we will do what we want with our own lives. I don't take comments or opinions like that to heart because I'm already doing things exactly how I want to, and if I wasn't, then I'd change it. So I really don't care lol.

    Even the sites I work on... they are very fair to me. I am choosing to work for that site, so I choose to give away the perentages that I do, and I'm happy with it for the traffic and marketing I get in return. If I didn't like those sites, I wouldn't work there anymore.

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