Page 4 of 6 FirstFirst ... 23456 LastLast
Results 76 to 100 of 126

Thread: This is why I hate going outside

  1. #76
    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2009
    Location
    London
    Posts
    3,542
    Thanks
    1,043
    Thanked 3,893 Times in 1,568 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Quote Originally Posted by rusdancer View Post
    Saw this yesterday on FB. This is so true. For some reason these kinds of comments may get worse when dressed down; maybe that is a perception of being more approachable? Also, unfortunately this kind of thing happens not only in NYC, but pretty much anywhere in the world. However, form personal experience in the US, these guys were much worse in DC (my previous city) than NYC because they could get very angry and aggressive if you completely ignored them.
    The thing is, maybe I'm wrong, but I feel like this is an American thing. Because a day never went by in LA where someone didn't catcall me, but I've had someone do that ONCE in London, in almost 9 months. It was a taxi driver who did the honking thing. And I'm not even just speaking about London but the ten other cities I've visited in the UK (England and Scotland).

    That's not to say though that the guys here are perfect gentlemen, I had to call the cops because some guy just grabbed my ass and then started telling me "suck my dick" over and over and then followed me home. But the general catcalling just doesn't seem to occur here, and it's not just me, as I've never seen guys do it to other women here either.

    It makes me wonder if there's something in American culture that perpetuates it? Also, I can't find it but here was a really sad video of a guy defending these guys actions to two women on TV and basically saying if they were more attractive and wealthy we women would like it. Uhm, not it doesn't work that way, don't care how rich you are. I once had an escorting client ask me how to pick up a woman in public and I basically told him it doesn't happen. I want to be able to go outside and enjoy myself and get shit done, not have to deal with sexual advances from strangers.

  2. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to audrey_k For This Useful Post:


  3. #77
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Dec 2013
    Posts
    177
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 94 Times in 59 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Man Defends His Girlfriend From a Catcaller

    http://www.news.yahoo.com/man-pays-h...213217547.html

  4. #78
    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Nudie-Land
    Posts
    7,219
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 4,151 Times in 1,462 Posts
    My Mood
    Sneaky

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Quote Originally Posted by jeffb View Post
    Man Defends His Girlfriend From a Catcaller

    http://www.news.yahoo.com/man-pays-h...213217547.html
    Terrible.

    That's just terrible.


    I have a theory that many catcallers are random dudes who suck at life. They lack the appropriate impulse controls to live successfully. Their lives are probably full of turmoil because of their inability to behave correctly all around. But hey, they're simply operating on a reptillian brain level... and... they can't help themselves because a sweet piece of ass MUST be hollered at (saracasm)!

    An eccentric friend of mine once said rather randomly: "never fight a bum, a bum has nothing left to lose." The message was clear. Some losers take ridiculous risks because they don't care. They have nothing to care about or they are incapable of caring about anything. That is friggin' dangerous! People with values will always end up on the losing end when it comes to agressively interacting some nut-bag.

    I have had MANY male friends throughout the years... absolutely zero percent of them catcalled girls on the street. Maybe it was because they were self conscious... maybe they were self conscious because they were sentient human beings.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

  5. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Sophia_Starina For This Useful Post:


  6. #79
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    170
    Thanks
    44
    Thanked 140 Times in 72 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    I can't recall ever "catcalling" women, but I will approach a woman that I am attracted to whenever I am not dating someone. I feel like I have a pretty good sense on how comfortable a woman is around me. I do my best to be direct about my intentions without being weird or embarrassing her. I guess my mother did a good job on that one?

    It is an odd behavior for sure.

  7. #80
    Banned
    Joined
    Mar 2012
    Location
    MilfVille
    Posts
    8,415
    Thanks
    29,866
    Thanked 19,603 Times in 6,566 Posts
    My Mood
    Happy

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    I was at the atm last night, (because our mail is delivered late). I knew a bad rain storm was coming today, so I had to get my check in last night for rent.
    The bank was closed, and some creep pounces in my space at the atm. Scared the crap outta me!
    I pride myself at having stellar hearing, but he was just being a sneaky mofo!
    He apologized, a little.. when I finished my business, I walked away, and he never even used the ATM!
    Then, while walking home from 7/11, THAT its own set of hoodlums waiting until I started leaving, so they could walk right behind me.
    I think if I didn't have my umbrella, (which was closed with a very pointy end).., they would have done something.

    It was only like 8 o'clock,, but it is still dark then, so the the freaks come out earlier now that its winter.

  8. #81
    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Nudie-Land
    Posts
    7,219
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 4,151 Times in 1,462 Posts
    My Mood
    Sneaky

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Man Viciously Attacks Woman for Refusing to Give Him Her Number

    "The woman, who remains unnamed, had apparently rejected (a man's) attempts to talk to her several times. According to DNAinfo Chicago, first she refused his request for her number and then, when she began to feel uncomfortable due to his behavior and actually moved to another car, he followed her and tried to steal her phone. He also put her in a headlock. Because, again, why not? Here's a nice guy trying to get a woman's number and she just out and disrespects him in front of everyone? That's ridiculous! You don't just reject a man! You don't just say no to a random stranger who comes up and demands your number while you're minding your own business. I don't think this woman understood, like FOX News anchors did, that while bars and clubs are nice, for many men the street is their bar and club; that's where they meet women."

    http://jezebel.com/man-viciously-att...-he-1666424378
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

  9. #82
    Banned Aniela's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2009
    Location
    KW
    Posts
    3,291
    Thanks
    6,920
    Thanked 5,854 Times in 2,242 Posts
    My Mood
    Cynical

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    I favour Fox's commentary on sm things, but this issue sure as hell ain't one of em. I didn't see their entire segment on the original link, but I saw enough of it. One of my relatives even said 'Well she posted her cup size on her online profile, & bills herself as an "actress" … so, not saying she deserves to be harassed but what does she expect?' I said 'So bc she posts those things on [what I presumed] a work-related online thing … it's perfectly ok to treat her that way? What abt Kate Winslet?' This did not go over well, esp when I brought up the fact that a lot of the guys harassing her in the video probably didn't do it bc they 'recognised that hot actress!'

    The fact that she's an actress is beside the point, but it seems every person who's nvr been on the receiving end of this behaviour wants to make her profession the main point.

  10. #83
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    May 2013
    Location
    Sverige!
    Posts
    651
    Thanks
    717
    Thanked 1,219 Times in 431 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    This is why, sadly, I never leave home without my husband. Quite literally, unless I am going to work. Going to 7-11? I ask him to come with me. Going to grocery store? I ask him to come with me. All because I get hassled so much. Sad.

  11. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Vackra For This Useful Post:


  12. #84
    Veteran Member TransdimensionalPrincess's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2014
    Posts
    500
    Thanks
    1,806
    Thanked 1,082 Times in 332 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Quote Originally Posted by Vackra View Post
    This is why, sadly, I never leave home without my husband. Quite literally, unless I am going to work. Going to 7-11? I ask him to come with me. Going to grocery store? I ask him to come with me. All because I get hassled so much. Sad.
    This is me too.

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to TransdimensionalPrincess For This Useful Post:


  14. #85
    Featured Member
    Joined
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    1,155
    Thanks
    1,422
    Thanked 2,980 Times in 970 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Quote Originally Posted by Aniela View Post
    I favour Fox's commentary on sm things, but this issue sure as hell ain't one of em. I didn't see their entire segment on the original link, but I saw enough of it. One of my relatives even said 'Well she posted her cup size on her online profile, & bills herself as an "actress" … so, not saying she deserves to be harassed but what does she expect?' I said 'So bc she posts those things on [what I presumed] a work-related online thing … it's perfectly ok to treat her that way? What abt Kate Winslet?' This did not go over well, esp when I brought up the fact that a lot of the guys harassing her in the video probably didn't do it bc they 'recognised that hot actress!'

    The fact that she's an actress is beside the point, but it seems every person who's nvr been on the receiving end of this behaviour wants to make her profession the main point.
    That really bugged me too, as well as the "well she's walking around in tight clothes with her hair down, what does she expect?" comments.

    Um, no. It's NYC, a world capitol for fashion. To me she looked dressy casual, or maybe like she's on her way to work at a restaurant.

  15. #86
    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2009
    Location
    London
    Posts
    3,542
    Thanks
    1,043
    Thanked 3,893 Times in 1,568 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Ever since I posted that comment about British guys not catcalling, I've been catcalled like 10x, during the winter in baggy coats. Still not anything like LA, but it was like they saw my post and were like "wait! Don't say that! We can be dickheads too!"

    I saw this posted on FB. Probably 100% staged but funny as fuck.

    Edit: posting the link would be helpful... http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/0...ushpmg00000063
    Last edited by audrey_k; 01-28-2015 at 12:27 PM.

  16. #87
    God/dess
    Joined
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    6,948
    Thanks
    2,846
    Thanked 5,526 Times in 3,113 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside


  17. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to slowpoke For This Useful Post:


  18. #88
    God/dess Selina M's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2013
    Location
    Omicron Persei 8
    Posts
    4,508
    Thanks
    12,529
    Thanked 13,934 Times in 3,720 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    I thought you all would appreciate this, hahaha:
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/0...ushpmg00000030

    Don't catcall a strange woman, it might just be your mom in disguise.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

    "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

  19. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Selina M For This Useful Post:


  20. #89
    Veteran Member she wolf's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2013
    Location
    CHI
    Posts
    238
    Thanks
    93
    Thanked 139 Times in 86 Posts
    My Mood
    Daring

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    You should see how Russian men approach women. Even in the West Indies omg you'd think these men have never seen a women. I was with my mom she is from there and loved the attention ... I thought they.d rape her. It's so gross I've had guys follow me in their cars, ask if I need a ride home, (south north w.e) grab me, block my path on the train. it's so creepy. I never leave the house in Chicago after 4 when it gets dark lol
    The only way to get rid of a temptation is to indulge in it...


    ~I have no roots. I stay away from groups and communities. I wander, an itinerant lone wolf. I have nowhere to go back to. I either burn the bridges or keep walking. I never look back. I detach and vanish. In my mind, I am not human. I am a machine at the service of a madman that snatched my body and invaded my being when I was very young~




  21. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to she wolf For This Useful Post:


  22. #90
    Featured Member kaninchen's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    1,659
    Thanks
    930
    Thanked 5,550 Times in 1,321 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Ugh! I hate getting gas because there's always some drooling loup garou following me around the station, telling me I'm beautiful and that he loves me. And I'm considering getting a new grocery store because I've had enough of the teenage boy employees where I already shop telling me I have a gorgeous smile when I'm just trying to buy some damn apples. Please, motherfucker. I know I don't have a gorgeous smile when I'm purposefully keeping my makeup-free face in a scowl.

    It's ridiculous that as women we are made to feel so uncomfortable in the most banal of public places.

    Actually, the most ridiculous thing that's been happening to me lately is catcalls BY MY NEIGHBORS. The back half of my property is next to the back half of a mechanic shop's property. The guys who work there have catcalled me before, yelling "Hola guerita bonita!" and stuff, but I had my boyfriend give them a stern talking-to and I didn't hear from them for like, six months. This morning I had planned to work in my garden, but as soon as I went into my back yard, I heard "Que pasa chiquita?" and "Ayyyy mami!" I just rolled my eyes and went back inside. They yell from inside this trailer, so I can never see who's doing it. It's incredibly creepy and aggravating.

    I wasn't in the mood to engage, but the next time it happens I'll go get my machete and trim some weeds. If they wanna test me then, they can!

  23. The Following User Says Thank You to kaninchen For This Useful Post:


  24. #91
    Featured Member gameover's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2006
    Posts
    784
    Thanks
    132
    Thanked 246 Times in 106 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    When I was younger, I went down to one of my company's plants in Mexico on business. It was a Friday, and the girls in the factory came into work all dressed up, so they could hit the bars as soon as they got off work. The factory was just light assembly. One of the pretty senioritas gave me a wolf whistle and a sexy smile as I walked by. Maybe it is because I'm blond, and that is rare down there, I don't know. But as a guy, I loved it.

    I'm sure it gets old for women, but enjoy it while you can, or just tolerate it. This is a "problem" that will resolve itself automatically for you as you get older. You may miss it later when it stops. I was flattered though.

  25. #92
    Banned Aniela's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2009
    Location
    KW
    Posts
    3,291
    Thanks
    6,920
    Thanked 5,854 Times in 2,242 Posts
    My Mood
    Cynical

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Quote Originally Posted by gameover View Post
    When I was younger, I went down to one of my company's plants in Mexico on business. It was a Friday, and the girls in the factory came into work all dressed up, so they could hit the bars as soon as they got off work. The factory was just light assembly. One of the pretty senioritas gave me a wolf whistle and a sexy smile as I walked by. Maybe it is because I'm blond, and that is rare down there, I don't know. But as a guy, I loved it.

    I'm sure it gets old for women, but enjoy it while you can, or just tolerate it. This is a "problem" that will resolve itself automatically for you as you get older. You may miss it later when it stops. I was flattered though.
    It's great that you don't find it offencive when it's done to you, but you've really got no leg to stand on telling others they should 'just tolerate it' bc you think it's no big deal. There's a fine line between flattering & offencive or even outright frightening. Must be nice that you've apparently nvr been on the receiving end of the 'non-flattering' kind of attention.

  26. #93
    God/dess ScarletKitten's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2013
    Location
    Hyperspace
    Posts
    2,208
    Thanks
    3,162
    Thanked 6,709 Times in 1,895 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    To be blunt, men don't get catcalled the way women do, and it doesn't happen as often to men. So, gameover, we appreciate the sentiment, but....you just don't get it.

    Enjoy it while we can???? Ummm.....NO.

    I'd rather "enjoy" anal sex with a cactus.

    Ugh. Men will never understand. It's infuriating. I swear to god if my bf and I ever break up, I'm becoming a lesbian, as my patience and sympathy for men in general are reaching a breaking point.
    "Dancing tables, making deals with devils like a drunk beauty queen"

  27. The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to ScarletKitten For This Useful Post:


  28. #94
    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2009
    Location
    London
    Posts
    3,542
    Thanks
    1,043
    Thanked 3,893 Times in 1,568 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    I think what men don't get is that most of the time it's not NICE things guys say to you, you hear something really disgusting and degrading, usually about what they want to do you, and then they turn nasty. I've had guys ask me for my number and then in the same sentence, once they see they're not going to get it, tell me they wouldn't have call back after they fucked me anyway. I'm supposed to be flattered by that? No thanks. It's one thing when a guy driving by yells "hey beautiful!" and drives off, it's another thing when they're describing when they want to do to you in bed and then become threatening/aggressive when you don't respond.

    And tolerate it? Why the fuck should I have to tolerate it?

  29. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to audrey_k For This Useful Post:


  30. #95
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Feb 2014
    Location
    The Internet
    Posts
    151
    Thanks
    678
    Thanked 227 Times in 95 Posts
    My Mood
    Asleep

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    I used to live next to a police station. These cops were the worst, EVERY SINGLE TIME I'd walk past they would wolf whistle and mutter and step up close to me. It was just a whole station of piggy entitled white cops. I only wish I had videod it. And there was nothing I could do, I'm always very conservatively dressed.

  31. #96
    Moderator Aurora_Sunset's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    6,430
    Thanks
    19,846
    Thanked 18,507 Times in 4,919 Posts
    My Mood
    Breezy

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Yeah, gameover, that's great that you had ONE time that this happened to you, but it was also done by a woman you were attracted to, all she did was whistle, and even if she had been ugly and more aggressive, I'm sure it's not as though you have to look at most women and feel truly intimidated that they could do something to you if you don't comply with their wishes.

    But what if, instead of this one time that you got whistled at by a pretty girl, it had been every single day, week after week, month after month, that you had to go into this factory, and you were approached by 10 unattractive, burly Mexican men twice your size, going on and on about how "pretty" you were, and then following you around describing the disgusting things they wanted to do to you, and getting hostile and threatening you if you told them to back off. And then, when you went to complain to your manager about how this was an ongoing problem that was making you feel very uncomfortable and even unsafe, he brushed you off with, "You should be flattered they think you're a hot, blond American! Just enjoy it and go about your business."

    I'm thinking you might not have found the situation quite so positive and flattering then.

    You know what? If I was ever whistled at by a "pretty, dressed-up senorita," I'd be flattered too. But you're comparing apples and oranges here.
    Last edited by Aurora_Sunset; 01-29-2015 at 12:30 PM.
    Don't try to win over the haters. You are not the Jerk Whisperer.

    Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.






  32. The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to Aurora_Sunset For This Useful Post:


  33. #97
    Featured Member gameover's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2006
    Posts
    784
    Thanks
    132
    Thanked 246 Times in 106 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Quote Originally Posted by Aurora_Sunset View Post
    Yeah, gameover, that's great that you had ONE time that this happened to you, but it was also done by a woman you were attracted to, all she did was whistle, and even if she had been ugly and more aggressive, I'm sure it's not as though you have to look at most women and feel truly intimated that they could do something to you if you don't comply with their wishes.

    But what if, instead of this one time that you got whistled at by a pretty girl, it had been every single day, week after week, month after month, that you had to go into this factory, and you were approached by 10 unattractive, burly Mexican men twice your size, saying disgusting things to you about how "pretty" you were, and then following you around describing the disgusting things they wanted to do to you, and getting hostile and threatening you if you told them to back off. And then, when you went to complain to your manager about how this was an ongoing problem that was making you feel very uncomfortable and even unsafe, he brushed you off with, "You should be flattered they think you're a hot, blond American! Just enjoy it and go about your business."

    I'm thinking you might not have found the situation quite so positive and flattering then.

    You know what? If I was ever whistled at by a "pretty, dressed-up senorita," I'd be flattered too. But you're comparing apples and oranges here.
    I see your point and agree with you. I've just never seen the threatening behavior you've described. I've only seen the wolf whistle or random "hey beautiful".

    I believe you when you say it happens. Maybe when the cat-callers are in a pack or don't see other guys around, they get more daring and aggressive; that's kind of like typical bully behavior.

    If you really have to put up with that type, I'm sorry. I've only seen the playful type. It sucks that your manager won't do anything about it.

  34. #98
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    11,037
    Thanks
    1,891
    Thanked 5,124 Times in 3,086 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Unless you've seen it, you can't judge. It's one thing if someone comes up to me and says "you're beautiful", it's another if someone says "you're beautiful and I want to fuck you so hard you little slut". or a difference between "you have nice legs" versus "you have nice legs I'd like to see them squeeze my dick". Btw I've had all of these said to me. In fact not long ago I had a guy at the library come up to me and say he thought I walked off the pages of a romance novel. I was flattered by this because he wasn't trying to date me or have sex. Most of the men who say dirty things are doing it because to them women (especially pretty women)are objects. I've had both guys by themselves and groups of guys say these things.

  35. #99
    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Cash-Stack-istan Island
    Posts
    14,704
    Thanks
    6,564
    Thanked 11,625 Times in 3,697 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Even if it's a nice compliment, strange men should really keep their mouths shut. They don't know how uncomfortable someone can feel. Some ppl don't care for attention from strangers.

    It's respecting ppl's boundaries.

  36. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Vyanka For This Useful Post:


  37. #100
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    11,037
    Thanks
    1,891
    Thanked 5,124 Times in 3,086 Posts

    Default Re: This is why I hate going outside

    Exactly. I'm not even sure why some men do it. Some are just pigs but I think others (especially the ones who don't say anything especially nasty)are likely socially awkward. Not that I'm justifying it, I just think some men don't think. Others don't care and these are the ones who say disgusting things.

Page 4 of 6 FirstFirst ... 23456 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. You're going to hate me for this....
    By J.D. in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 10-30-2014, 04:42 AM
  2. Replies: 20
    Last Post: 10-05-2014, 05:59 PM
  3. Hate Vick? Hate dogfighting?
    By Djoser in forum For Sale & Wanted
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 02-02-2012, 01:07 AM
  4. I HATE, HATE, HATE my haircut!!!!
    By amazonas in forum Body Business
    Replies: 42
    Last Post: 03-18-2008, 02:41 AM
  5. I hate boobs. Hate 'em!
    By Fawn in forum Body Business
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 10-05-2007, 01:36 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •