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Thread: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

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    Default Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    My wife and I (both early 40s) were celebrating our anniversary and decided to visit a strip club for novelty's sake. It had been 20+ years since I had been, and my wife had never been. She was game for it, although she didn't think she'd like/want a dance for herself.

    Found an upscale club that advertised itself as couples-friendly. We went, were approached by a couple of dancers before we settled on one that we both liked - very nice attitude and came across very friendly. Spent $100 on dances - and was pleasantly surprised when my wife got into it and had a couple of dances herself. Decided to call it a night, but before we left, our dancer (unsolicited) offered her number to my wife and I. Neither one of us was born yesterday - obviously a ploy to get us back in and spend more $$$. Didn't think much of it, since I was thinking this was a one-time deal. However, the next morning my wife suggested we go back that night. After I picked my jaw up off the floor, I sent a quick text and made a date to meet up with our dancer that night. Dropped $450 on dances and time with her that night. A good time was had by all (no "extras" by any strech of the imagination - just dances for the both of us and general adult conversation).

    2 weeks later - we were back and spent $700 for several more hours of her time. And we'll be visiting her again in 2 weeks time to celebrate both my wife's birthday and my own (6 days apart). We're budgeting $1000 for this trip.

    Based on what I've seen on SW, it appears I've managed to capture lightning in a bottle. I found a dancer who enjoys dancing for couples (she even sent us some Halloween pics of herself in her costume), and my wife is open-minded enough to go and enjoy herself and have some fun. All because a dancer sat down and talked with my wife for 5 minutes and established a rapport before asking if we wanted to have some fun.

    We're fully aware that she sees $$$, but we have no problem with that. It gives us a chance to get out and escape the day-to-day routine with the kids. Granted, we could probably find a cheaper outlet for fun, but we're enjoying our time with her.

    I know we're probably the exception to the rule, but I know there's a dancer that's probably pretty happy she took a chance on us...

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Yes, you two are VERY rare!! What this dancer managed to do is akin to a car salesman trying to sell a car to a homeless man.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    You guys really are unicorns. But my aversion to couples comes mostly from drunken 20 somethings I want to throat punch with my stilettos. The few couples I do like are attractive health nuts late 30's-mid 40's. They're impeccably groomed and in great shape.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Well, my wife and I aren't health nuts, but we're in pretty decent shape. I'd say both of us are carrying an extra 10-15 pounds. However, we dress quite nicely, are respectful to the dancers, and have been together long enough that there is a level of trust / security between us that I can't really explain. We're completely at ease in the club. I'm sure our dancer picked up on this, which probably made her more comfortable as well.

    I'm just enjoying the ride for now. It's not often that your wife asks if we're ready to go back to the club and have half-naked women dance for us. :-)

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    I've had some good experiences with couples as an escort-- I have one couple I've seen a couple times that are great, young, the wife is super fucking hot, and they're both open-minded and relaxed and always bring an expensive bottle of champagne with them. But then I've had some really shitty experiences where I'm basically a marriage counselor for 2 hours trying to convince the wife her husband wants to sleep with her as much as he wants to sleep with me and trying to calm them both down as the dysfunctional communication pattern they have plays itself out. If I'm going to be a marriage counselor, I'm going to charge you more and keep my clothes on! I don't think I've ever had a good experience with couples in an SC, usually it's the guy trying to get me to dance with his wife who is totally not interested but doesn't want her husband to think she's boring, so she says OK and flinches everytime my boobs are near her face. Not into that. But as an escort, I generally love couples, I can charge them twice as much, they're grateful because escorts here hate couples, and I do half the work since there's another girl there.

    For me it's about how the woman reacts. If she's relaxed, not judgmental, and confident, I have no issue. If she's insecure, jealous, and wants to look down on me for being a sex worker, I can't get out of there fast enough.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Obviously anytime you introduce a 3rd person into a relationship - whatever state it happens to be in at the time, there's the potential for mishap/disaster. I also understand the whole "fool me once, shame on you - fool me twice, shame on me" mentality that could leave anyone leery of a particular demographic (young guys, couples, Indians, Hispanics, whatever).

    We're just thankful that we found a dancer who either hadn't had a bad experience with a couple (yet), or who was able to overlook that negative experience and gave us a chance. :-)

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    I'm like tempest. I like dancing for couples who are a bit older and more sophisticated. I don't want some frat boy with his hater gf slapping my ass really hard so I avoid young couples. I like the couples who are respectful and cool with no jealousy issues. I have had some positive experiences dancing for couples but they're rare. I actually do enjoy dancing for women. They usually aren't as grabby and they smell nice. Enjoy yourselves!

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    I got an older gentleman and his "niece" who wanted a dance from me. Sure thing Julia Roberts!
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Just a followup to my original post. My wife and I went back this past weekend as a quasi-celebration for both our birthdays. We spent a little over 6 hours with the dancer (basically the whole night). I paid her $1500 plus bought her whatever she wanted to eat/drink. She didn't over-indulge - just drank water and had a glass of wine with us. Our tab ended up about $350 - but tipped the waitress another $200 because she gave great service.

    As I mentioned before - no extras (not looking for them). I guess the only "inappropriate" thing my wife and I did were touch her breasts - but that's only after she directed our hands to them herself. She also played a bit with my wife's breasts. We all ended up giving each other back massages as well.

    We paid a lot of money but feel it was well spent. Our dancer earned every penny - she danced her ass off for us. Also - almost forgot to mention. The dancer knew it was our birthdays and she got us a small present - some candles/scents for the house. Totally unexpected but very welcome indeed.

    All in all - a great night.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Quote Originally Posted by argentntx View Post
    Just a followup to my original post. My wife and I went back this past weekend as a quasi-celebration for both our birthdays. We spent a little over 6 hours with the dancer (basically the whole night). I paid her $1500 plus bought her whatever she wanted to eat/drink. She didn't over-indulge - just drank water and had a glass of wine with us. Our tab ended up about $350 - but tipped the waitress another $200 because she gave great service.

    As I mentioned before - no extras (not looking for them). I guess the only "inappropriate" thing my wife and I did were touch her breasts - but that's only after she directed our hands to them herself. She also played a bit with my wife's breasts. We all ended up giving each other back massages as well.

    We paid a lot of money but feel it was well spent. Our dancer earned every penny - she danced her ass off for us. Also - almost forgot to mention. The dancer knew it was our birthdays and she got us a small present - some candles/scents for the house. Totally unexpected but very welcome indeed.

    All in all - a great night.
    Congratulations. I am very happy that you had a good time. Fun-loving, friendly couples are always a treat.

    In the future, may I suggest tipping the dancer at least as much as you tipped the waitress for carrying some glasses and plates? You tipped the waitress... who gets paid a base wage.... a little over 57% of the tab.

    As you know, dancers PAY to work... and it is likely that a substantial portion of the $250 per hour that you spent ($1,500 divided by 6 hours) on the dancer actually went to the club.

    How much did you tip the dancer for the six hours?


    Sure it's nice that things went well. But I am certain that the best part of the evening was not the waitress.

    Don't forget to tip your strippers, please.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Don't worry - I do tip the dancers. I didn't go into details in my post, but this is how it played out. I sent her a text earlier in the week telling her I was going to pay her $1500 total. I told her I didn't care if it was $1000 fee + $500 tip, $1250 fee + $250 tip, or any variation thereof. I also told her that she was in charge of the clock. If she had wanted, she could have stopped at the 2 or 3 hour mark and that would have been fine (I might have felt a little unappreciative with just 2 hours, but still...)

    Regarding fees to the club, after the 1st couple of visits, we decided to buy the $2500 lifetime VIP membership (The Lodge in Dallas). She told us the money we pay her is all hers. I don't know if that's true or not. I'm sure she has some sort of tip out, but she hasn't mentioned it.

    Pre-VIP, we bought $60 and $300 worth of dances and tipped $40 and $150, respectively.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Damn you guys sound like you rock! I will keep your story in mind the next time I'm thinking about ignoring a couple in the club. As a side note, if I was already receiving $1500, I would not really expect a tip on top of that. It's always appreciated, of course, but it sounds like you are definitely taking care of this girl (and also respecting her boundaries.)

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    I don't even believe this. Lol

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    This is all sounds too good to be true, but I've also seen or heard about other "it probably is" situations. I've had a regular who would bring me packs of my second favorite cigarettes to smoke while I was with him because he liked their smell, tip me 20s and 50s on stage before buying blocks of time in VIP where we just cuddled and talked with my clothes on, and I maybe danced two or three songs during our 1-3 hour blocks. (Damn, I would have dated that guy in a heartbeat if I'd had the chance!) A mentor dancer taught me the value of being nice to every respectful customer when she told me the story of how she made an $800 tip for five minutes of her time, just because she made this guy feel good about himself when he was broke and at his lowest a few days before his windfall.

    Your story is definitely lightning in a bottle, OP. It's rare to find such a winning combination between three people, especially in an arrangement like this one. Enjoy every second of it.

    I especially think the dancer is lucky as fuck. I NEVER come across couples I enjoy like she apparently is! I'd say at least 95% of the couples I meet, one of the parties has some kind of problem with the situation. The remaining 5% are very handsy and/or want extras.
    Exotic dancing is like any other job.
    If you work in an office, you wear dress shoes and a suit.
    If you work in a restaraunt, you wear skid resistant shoes and a uniform.
    If you work in a strip club, you wear 7" stilettos and lycra g-strings.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    I'm with Lokikola on this one. Even if it's true, I don't get why OP felt the need to tell us this story as if the dancer was something special because she hustled you guys. Boy please, I couldn't give two fucks about your experience, it ain't going to change a damn thing in terms of how I ignore female customers. I know for a Fact that couples are the lowest spenders, if they even spend. She probably had to go through tons of cheap couples before one finally paid off. I don't take chances. I need to make myself available to serious guys who are there to spend.

    Let me tell you something. Last Friday, while most of the girls were entertaining and performing only floor dances for couples, I was with a guy who spent over $360 in VIPs and tipped me $250 on top of it. All in a half hour period, then he had to go home. Then I spent the rest of the night doing more VIPs for more of my beloved women-free serious spenders. All though out that time I have not seen one couple or female inside the VIP and believe me the club was packed with couples that day. Therefore, your questionable story is not going to change my view on couples.

    I never expect to win the strip club couple lottery, nor would I want to. With that said, I spend my time and positive energy on horny men; and not for men whose wife I gotta win over before he even whips out a 20 for a dance. If there are no solo men available, I just sit back and order me a glass of wine or refresh myself in the back while I await the later crowd. With that said, I'm never desperate enough to even risk having my good vibe drained by couples because I'm gonna need that for later if I want to make real money.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    I guess the only point/purpose of my original post was to highlight the fact that summarily dismissing a particular class of customer just because of past experience may not work in your favor. Did she hustle us? I don't know. Doesn't matter to me, really. Each time we've gone we've only spent the money we had budgeted to spend (aside from the lifetime VIP membership). We had such a good time we figured we'd be making return visits, and as such, purchased it because the VIP area is $500/visit plus what you pay the dancer. We figured the membership would pay for itself after a few visits. The VIP area gave us privacy from guys enjoying the free show. Plus we get discounted food and free car washes while we're there. :-)

    And to be honest - it doesn't really matter to me whether you believe me or not. I have no reason to lie. But this is your web site - I'm here as a mere guest. As I stated in the original subject, this post was meant as an observation - not a question. My wife and I both spent time here, on tuscl, and even eccie trying to get a feel on what clubs were 'clean' - where we could both be entertained without running into obvious extras. We were a bit nervous - mainly due to the mainly negative feedback here about couples. However, we both feel we picked the right club - and found the right dancer (or she found us). We got what we were looking for - several sexy 'date nights' out - and our dancer is now $3000+ richer (and counting) because of it. End of story, really.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    And my point is that I’ve been in the industry and one of the top earners long enough to know that your advice is a step towards the wrong direction. What happened to the girl was extremely rare to the point it makes no sense to encourage other strippers to waste their time and energy trying to win female clients over the next time they work. You’re setting us up for disappointment and believe me, I know you don’t mean to. You guys are the ideal perfect couple customers that almost do not exist. The reality when dealing with couples is, that the female is either awkward, doesn’t want to be there, gets jealous at her man, rude and the list goes on. I have given up on them and ever since then, I’ve seen an increase in my earnings.

    As for the $3,000 comment, once again she’s lucky; however I have tons of money saved up in the bank, was able to purchase a brand new car in full and live a comfortable lifestyle and that’s no thanks to couples. I avoid all couples and will only dance for them if they approach me and the most they’ve ever spent on me was 80 bucks. Furthermore, the girls at my club who brag about “I love female customers” are the same ones making half or less than half of what I make per night, therefore I never take them seriously.

    I will say that last Friday I was grateful for couples. As I said before, last Friday my club was saturated with couples and girls were all over them doing floor dances; while I relaxed, enjoyed my wine and ignored them. 20 minutes later I spotted a man all alone and ignored. Turns out he was a high spender. If the majority of the couples hadn’t made it in that night, girls would have bombarded him like there was no tomorrow; thus causing me to miss out on the big bucks. Instead many were busy and distracted with the couples. Put things in a new perspective for me. Couples serve to distract my fellow stripper competitors from high spenders, so that I can have a better shot at them. I call it survival of the fittest baby. Sort of reminds me of this video
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uBuPiC3ArL8

    You can only be one place at once and will lose out if in the wrong place. The way I see it is in the strip club world, I am the crow, couples are the petty piece of bread but if I’m willing to be patient and let go of the bread, I will catch me a fish (serious women free high spender).

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Congrats argentntx....sounds like you did indeed strike gold!

    And just ignore hating bitches like the one above. They serve no purpose here except to hate. As if any female or couple would even want to get a dance from someone like her. Ignore her and her kind.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Quote Originally Posted by onamission View Post
    Congrats argentntx....sounds like you did indeed strike gold!

    And just ignore hating bitches like the one above. They serve no purpose here except to hate. As if any female or couple would even want to get a dance from someone like her. Ignore her and her kind.
    This is really out of line.

    While I disagree sm what w/ Kassie, bc I am a girl who typically does very well w/ couples(both socially & financially), she didn't exactly start stripping ystrdy. She has been doing this job for a while & she made very valid points in her post. OP & his wife, if he was telling the truth 100% (or even 75% for that matter) are truly unicorns among SC couples. I would go so far as to say they are unicorn-ish among SC customers in general, at least among the customers that would regularly drop that kind of $$$ on the same girl. Esp so if no extras are involved.

    I have had only a few 'problem couples' myself, but those 'problem couples' were all nasty enough that I understand fully why many girls avoid them. For all the advice we give each other abt trying every available customer -- bc it's true, you nvr know who will spend big on you if you don't try -- dancers profile customers based on business experience much more than emotionally rooted reasons, or 'hating tendencies.' If you were a dancer yourself rather than just a 'casual customer' you would see that it's truly nothing personal.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    I'm going with Aniela on this one, and my experience is the complete inverse of hers.

    Kassie's post may be harshly biased, but it's because of experience. It's a pretty common idea in this industry (and especially on this forum, it seems) that top earners are too busy hustling to hate. Part of that hustle is profiling customers and taking a shot on the ones that are most our type or we can easily adapt to.

    Since OP and his wife are basically a two-fold unicorn (a great couple AND big spenders without extras), what mythical creature should we call them? Is Pegasus a thing yet?
    Exotic dancing is like any other job.
    If you work in an office, you wear dress shoes and a suit.
    If you work in a restaraunt, you wear skid resistant shoes and a uniform.
    If you work in a strip club, you wear 7" stilettos and lycra g-strings.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Quote Originally Posted by onamission View Post
    Congrats argentntx....sounds like you did indeed strike gold!

    And just ignore hating bitches like the one above. They serve no purpose here except to hate. As if any female or couple would even want to get a dance from someone like her. Ignore her and her kind.
    First, I’d like to thank Aneila and Naida for taking the time to post some common stripper sense into you. They pretty much summed up everything I was going to reply, but I will say this:

    We here at stripperweb all have different experiences and opinions. What works for one person doesn’t always work for the other. While we may strongly disagree with one another; we are at least mature enough not to take personal offense to it and call one another “hating bitches”. You don’t know me well enough to label me that. With that said, I enjoy posting my insight as well as reading others. It helps me better understand other girls whom do things differently than I do at my club. While I value their input, I will not hesitate to disagree with them and vice versa. At the end of the day, we all are trying to be the best stripper we can be and we do this by sharing our experiences, inputs, advice etc.

    If anyone is going to be a hating bitch, it’s going to be most of female customers that have been rude and disgusting towards me over the years, for no reason. I’ve even dealt with females who sit down pissed off and crossing their arms on my stage area, and that’s just one example. I’ve had enough of that nonsense and I have developed zero tolerance for it. Simple as that. You have got a lot to learn little girl…

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    How about this? Don't dismiss us simply because we're a couple. I've seen numerous posts about how well dancers can read customers' body language and what-not. So read us - and then decide. I certainly understand if you've had bad experiences before - but don't hold that against us. But if you're picking up negative vibes, by all means - stay away. Like you said, it's not worth wasting your time.

    Here's a nugget I left out in my original post - on our 1st visit, we walked in, sat down, and ordered our drinks. Before our drinks had been delivered to us, we were approached by a dancer. She didn't say "Wanna dance?", but it was pretty damn close. I explained we had just gotten there, were waiting for our drinks to arrive, and wanted to get the feel for the club since my wife was a strip club virgin. I said that we'd be more than welcome to visit with her in a bit. She abruptly turned around and walked off. My wife commented that it was a bit rude, and I had to agree. She may have been having a bad night - or was just fed up with couples in general. Either way, guess who didn't get our money that night - or any other night? Negative attitudes work both ways.

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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    As a matter of fact, I do read body languages in couples, specifically in females all the time. I have seen more tight faces, tensed bodies, crossed arms, devious smirks, awkward expressions, and more characteristics exhibiting jealously than you can imagine. Last month when a nice gentlemen asked me to give his girlfriend a dance, she had her hands up in the air like I was going to shoot her. I could tell she didn’t like girls and didn’t want to be there. I would have danced for her boyfriend solo but that’s just asking for trouble. Very rarely do I encounter couples where both parties seem at ease and comfortable but when I do, I tend to make the girl feel great during dances; as in slow sensual touches, amazing backrubs etc. However, I encounter nice couples as often as I see a 3 legged dog walking in the streets.

    With that said, I don’t dismiss customers who express interest in me but at the same time I won’t go out of my way approaching several couples before I hit jackpot, I can’t stress enough how rare it is to bank of couples alone as well as find a female that genuinely want to get up close and personal with a stripper; therefore, I focus on horny men for they are my primary and reliable source of income.

    As for the first dancer you were approached by, this is a problem that not only couples deal with, but men who come alone as well. It seems to me you took it personal, but she just needs to learn how to be patient and connect with the customers before jumping into selling dances. That’s not my style. I live by the rule, if you’re going to do something, then do it well, if not, then don’t do it at all.

    In regards to your “guess who didn’t get our money that night comment”, I personally laugh at anyone who would try to use that against me because if I don’t get it from customer A then I will get it from customer B, C and or D. It’s no loss to me, really. I have no problems with finding men who are willing to spend.

    It seems to me that you refuse to spend money on a girl unless she approaches you and it doesn’t always have to be like that. My word of advice to you is, you should be understanding of what strippers go through on a regular basis with couples. While we do read body languages, we don’t have x ray vision to see right through your wallet, nor do we read mines. With that said, don’t be afraid to approach dancers also. If we know you’re interested, it makes a world of a difference on how you will be treated.

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  40. #24
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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    ^^ Yup.

    Also I really loathe dancing for women, even in couples because one of two things happens to me:

    1. They are abusive in some way
    2. They get way too into it.

    The last time I danced for a girl she wrapped her legs around my leg, clamped down and started humping my leg and moaning loudly while I stood there like a deer in the headlights. They always try to show me their vaginas. It's also doubly weird for me because I am not into girls. At all. Like not even a tiny scrap. So it feels very forced for me.

    Also I am almost 5'10" and American girls are so. damn. short. I feel like a giant grasshopper.

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  42. #25
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    Default Re: Dancing for couples (1st hand observation / not a question per se)

    Omg, why do female customers do this?! Every single one has asked and/or tried to show me their tits and/or vagina. I'm into females occasionally, but the chicks who actually enjoy dances with me are never hot.
    Exotic dancing is like any other job.
    If you work in an office, you wear dress shoes and a suit.
    If you work in a restaraunt, you wear skid resistant shoes and a uniform.
    If you work in a strip club, you wear 7" stilettos and lycra g-strings.

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