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Thread: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

  1. #1
    God/dess threlayer's Avatar
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    Default Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    I read the link from a post in "stripping" about a stripping article on CNN.
    I've also been exhausted by my own compliance when it has meant more money, which I desperately needed at the time. Although it's rare to find love in a strip club, what is found there is a more simple intimacy: human connection, compassion, desire and touch.
    Strip clubs exist because people are acutely lonesome. We walk around with these giant knots in our hearts, like a cramp that can't stretch out. It tugs and pulls at us all day while at our jobs, surrounded by people and gadgets and family members who don't listen to us like they used to, highlighting our own failures to connect to people easily in a meaningful way.
    What I've learned about humanity in my protracted tenure as a dancer is that we are a culture dying of loneliness in a frenzy to feel less so. Sex workers offer a reprieve from that loneliness. I've learned that everyone may be fighting a great battle, caring for a sick spouse, worried about their meth-addicted daughter or struggling with a medical condition.
    I've learned that timing and kindness are more important than big boobs.
    I think these encounters occur occasionally for many strippers. I know it's not your job to listen to this, but many of your more mature customers appreciate it.
    Last edited by threlayer; 11-07-2014 at 10:13 AM. Reason: durn! cant correct my title TYPO
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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    Banned Aniela's Avatar
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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    Quote Originally Posted by threlayer View Post
    I read the link from a post in "stripping" about a stripping article on CNN.

    I think these encounters occur occasionally for many strippers. I know it's not your job to listen to this, but many of your more mature customers appreciate it.
    I always appreciated these customers, bc I found them to be the most appreciative of what they were getting from me. I still remember one guy who came into my home club in TX, just out of a longterm relationship & needing sm empathetic female company. My ex had died barely 2wks b4 so we really did connect thru our losses. It was a very easy hr for me $$wise, but what really stuck w/ me abt that encounter was the way he actually behaved like a human being rather than the animals so many guys seem to emulate.

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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    Quote Originally Posted by Aniela View Post
    I always appreciated these customers, bc I found them to be the most appreciative of what they were getting from me. I still remember one guy who came into my home club in TX, just out of a longterm relationship & needing sm empathetic female company. My ex had died barely 2wks b4 so we really did connect thru our losses. It was a very easy hr for me $$wise, but what really stuck w/ me abt that encounter was the way he actually behaved like a human being rather than the animals so many guys seem to emulate.
    How fortunate for him that he ran into you, instead of some of the more mercenary types in the business.

    To qualify, I often give the more sensitive/shy/less aggressive dancers the sales pep talks and in them I generally encourage them to think like vampires--that and exhortations of 'No Prisoners!' and such.

    It's a brutal business to be sure, but it is also a business in which sales ability is paramount to success. And the very best salesmen & women are very much attuned to the buyers' mental state, life circumstances, etc.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

    ______________________________________

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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    I was raised around mental illness and a sister and father on the autism spectrum. This and other things have forced me to see things from different perspectives and have compassion for others who are going through things I can't see. I have a regular who is very smart but also obviously on the spectrum, and I think that the reason we get along so well is that I am patient with him and genuinely understand him.

    Strippers are most definitely not all heartless sharks!
    "These lumps- I know you wanna slump up on these lumps! But you can't cause you're a chump- a chuuuump."
    Lumpy Space Princess

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    God/dess SnuffleUffleGrass's Avatar
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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    I noticed the primary problem with being a kinder type of dancer is- sharky dancers equate kindess with weakness & will try to run off gentler girls because they think they can. I'm all for making those girls feel and inch tall at work because hell, if you can get your customer to agree...most of them will turn tail and leave.

    I also feel like some clubs are better for a more conventional approach (thoughtful, kind)...& some clubs are structured to be "lapdance factories"...It's much harder to build rapport with a customer when everything in the club is structured to rush things along.

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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    I am reminded of one of my all time favorite blog posts ever EVER

    http://www.hobostripper.com/the-stri...-cosmic-titty/

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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    Quote Originally Posted by leiaswift View Post
    I am reminded of one of my all time favorite blog posts ever EVER

    http://www.hobostripper.com/the-stri...-cosmic-titty/
    OMG. I love this!!!!!!

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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    Quote Originally Posted by leiaswift View Post
    I am reminded of one of my all time favorite blog posts ever EVER

    http://www.hobostripper.com/the-stri...-cosmic-titty/

    That absolutely made my day.

    I've been experiencing more and more of this at work lately, even though I don't work in a champagne-room club, just a lap dance club. More frequently I've been finding myself sitting in laps and talking (listening, affirming) in the lap dance room, rather than actually dancing - and instead of 1, 2, or 3 songs I've started measuring time in fifties and hundreds. I needed to read this because I've really noticed a change in my "hustle" and needed to know that other people do this, too.

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    God/dess Flickdreams's Avatar
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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    Wow, amazing post! im putting that Blog to the blog thread.

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    Featured Member Tourdefranzia's Avatar
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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    I'm surprised that this actually needs to be said. When I first started dancing I was confused why so many people spent such large sums of money just to watch an average(ish) girl take her clothes off. Especially when porn was just a click away (or trip to a video store. I've been at this a while.). It only took me a few weeks of dancing to realize that we are definitely providing more than just bare flesh.

    Hell, I've been in the position of feeling lonely and have found myself picking up extra shifts when I just wanted some company.

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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    Quote Originally Posted by Tourdefranzia View Post
    I'm surprised that this actually needs to be said. When I first started dancing I was confused why so many people spent such large sums of money just to watch an average(ish) girl take her clothes off. Especially when porn was just a click away (or trip to a video store. I've been at this a while.). It only took me a few weeks of dancing to realize that we are definitely providing more than just bare flesh.
    This is exactly true in a couple ways. I've found that when I've take a dancer in the top percentile of a club in terms of attractiveness, I often leave unsatisfied. Why? She's one of the hottest dancers in there! Why would the experience by anything less than electrifying? Because many hot dancers think that's all we want: an attractive lady dancing on our laps. But it takes more than that. Personally, in order to really enjoy myself, a dancer needs to at least appear interested in the dance and not as if going through the motions. There needs to be some connection.

    Rarely, I also find myself needing to enjoy the company. This usually happens when I'm away from home on a business trip. I try to be careful, because it's those times when you're lonely that you become vulnerable to real predatory types. Still, some dancers are very good at accommodating that desire without exploiting it. I'd call that a suggestion of a heart of gold.

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    Veteran Member zoezoebelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: Strpiier with a "Heart of Gold"

    Quote Originally Posted by SnuffleUffleGrass View Post
    I noticed the primary problem with being a kinder type of dancer is- sharky dancers equate kindess with weakness & will try to run off gentler girls because they think they can. I'm all for making those girls feel and inch tall at work because hell, if you can get your customer to agree...most of them will turn tail and leave.

    I also feel like some clubs are better for a more conventional approach (thoughtful, kind)...& some clubs are structured to be "lapdance factories"...It's much harder to build rapport with a customer when everything in the club is structured to rush things along.
    If you're a kind dancer who also makes a lot of money and is in demand, the sharky dancers will tend to shut the fuck up. xD My first day ever dancing, all the girls were making backhanded compliments and trying to give me bad advice, making fun of me, saying I wouldn't last a day, etc. After I spent two hours in the VIP without doing any extras, I walked by a group of dancers and managers sitting in the hall talking about me. They all stared wide-eyed and haven't made fun of me since.

    This is what I learned from growing up in the south: velvet glove, iron fist. I don't need to put on a show and act tough, because the customers will love my honesty and sweetness, and the other girls will eventually become intimidated by it when they realise there is more to me than meets the eye. But you're right, this doesn't work in the clubs which are more physical and have less opportunity for a rapport.

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