Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: Reigning in a regular

  1. #1
    Veteran Member Miss_Red's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2014
    Location
    PDXXX
    Posts
    279
    Thanks
    1,828
    Thanked 1,167 Times in 220 Posts

    Sad Reigning in a regular

    So I have a regular. He's fairly dependable, nice enough to talk to, and there's money...or there used to be. I'm starting to have some issues, mostly stemming from my inexperience I think. One issue is that starting a few weeks ago, he has begun spending less and less money every time he comes in. I think he's trying to find out how little money he can spend and still have a fun evening of conversation with me. Normally, the answer would be to pack it in and leave when dances aren't forthcoming but I work at a dead club right now and he's often one of the only people in the damn place.

    The other issue is kind of embarrassing, and I know I'm a goddamn idiot so there's no need to bring it up. Basically, he was one of my first regulars and I was a lot less good at saying "no" then I am now. At this point, I've become a lot more confident in my sexiness and personality and I do not allow men to do anything in private dances that's against club rules, like boob groping. This regular, however, has been quietly and slowly pushing that with me, starting from when I was less confident, until that's honestly most of the dance I do for him at this point. I'm not sure how to fix this, or if I can fix this at this point. How does one back away from something like that?

    Do I ditch the regular, or is there a way to try and reverse this situation? I know regulars aren't forever but money is absolute shit right now (did I mention my club is effing dead?) and I don't want to turn my back on what has become consistent, but low-grade high-stress money.

  2. #2
    God/dess Selina M's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2013
    Location
    Omicron Persei 8
    Posts
    4,508
    Thanks
    12,529
    Thanked 13,934 Times in 3,720 Posts

    Default Re: Reigning in a regular

    This is incredibly typical of regulars. They all have expiration dates, and all you can do is drink the milk until it goes "sour"... usually either because the money stops flowing so freely, or you get tired of dealing with their bullshit.

    It's probably not worth the stress and possible anxiety/PTSD/whatever you may develop from dealing with him, especially if the money is not so good from him, so you'd probably do best to ditch him.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

    "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

  3. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Selina M For This Useful Post:


  4. #3
    Featured Member
    Joined
    May 2011
    Posts
    1,809
    Thanks
    2,282
    Thanked 3,638 Times in 1,173 Posts

    Default Re: Reigning in a regular

    I feel like once regulars think they can do more or start trying to do more that's when it's getting close to their "expiration date". I had a customer who spent SO much money on me just sitting in VIP and talking. But eventually he kept trying to get away with things I wasn't comfortable with and that's when he stopped being my regular. Every now and then he comes in and gets some dances or maybe one VIP and the whole time I'm just pushing him off me and I can tell he is really annoyed I won't let him do anything. I'll only dance for him if it's slow and even then if he gets a couple dances I just stop after like 2 or 3 because it's so unnecessary to deal with. I think dealing with the deadness is better mentally than dealing with a customer who's constantly trying to push your boundaries. I've never been able to reverse a regular from wanting extras to being happy with just dancing and talking.

  5. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to 22lligm For This Useful Post:


  6. #4
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Sep 2014
    Posts
    491
    Thanks
    2,517
    Thanked 1,320 Times in 344 Posts

    Default Re: Reigning in a regular

    On to the next.

  7. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to NightGoddess For This Useful Post:


  8. #5
    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2008
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    4,980
    Thanks
    621
    Thanked 6,894 Times in 2,672 Posts

    Default Re: Reigning in a regular

    Ditch ditch ditch! Not only is he spending less and less on you, but he's also pushing your boundaries to boot. He's not worth your time. And honestly, it sounds like your current club isn't worth your time either if he's regularly the only customer at times. If there are other options nearby, now is a great time to give them a shot.

  9. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to shanna dior For This Useful Post:


  10. #6
    Veteran Member LexiConn's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2012
    Location
    west coast
    Posts
    282
    Thanks
    681
    Thanked 411 Times in 157 Posts

    Default Re: Reigning in a regular

    If I change my boundaries I change them even for regulars. If they can't handle it they eliminate themselves.

    Also if it's slow and they're not paying me I'll sit in the back. I won't play pool. I won't sit and talk for free. Because then they come in when it's slow, for free entertainment and it exhausts me. Blah

  11. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to LexiConn For This Useful Post:


  12. #7
    Banned Aniela's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2009
    Location
    KW
    Posts
    3,291
    Thanks
    6,920
    Thanked 5,854 Times in 2,242 Posts
    My Mood
    Cynical

    Default Re: Reigning in a regular

    Quote Originally Posted by reinaroja View Post
    So I have a regular. He's fairly dependable, nice enough to talk to, and there's money...or there used to be. I'm starting to have some issues, mostly stemming from my inexperience I think. One issue is that starting a few weeks ago, he has begun spending less and less money every time he comes in. I think he's trying to find out how little money he can spend and still have a fun evening of conversation with me. Normally, the answer would be to pack it in and leave when dances aren't forthcoming but I work at a dead club right now and he's often one of the only people in the damn place.

    The other issue is kind of embarrassing, and I know I'm a goddamn idiot so there's no need to bring it up. Basically, he was one of my first regulars and I was a lot less good at saying "no" then I am now. At this point, I've become a lot more confident in my sexiness and personality and I do not allow men to do anything in private dances that's against club rules, like boob groping. This regular, however, has been quietly and slowly pushing that with me, starting from when I was less confident, until that's honestly most of the dance I do for him at this point. I'm not sure how to fix this, or if I can fix this at this point. How does one back away from something like that?

    Do I ditch the regular, or is there a way to try and reverse this situation? I know regulars aren't forever but money is absolute shit right now (did I mention my club is effing dead?) and I don't want to turn my back on what has become consistent, but low-grade high-stress money.
    Addressing the bolded part first, since to me that is the most important part of your post. Ask yourself, literally: 'WHOSE BODY IS THIS?' The owner of the body makes the rules. The owner of the body decides what's ok, not the person taking advantage of that body. If the mind attached to that body decides to re-think what it's ok w/, there isn't one goddamn thing wrong, or gyppy, or bait&switchy abt it. No customer 'owns' your body just bc they have paid for your time. If your regular really had no problems 'getting it' w/o paying, he wouldn't be in the SC in the first place. Fk his feelings, bc he isn't the one being made to feel uncomfortable here. If he doesn't like your new rules, let him go sm where else & take his high-maintenance, entitled, over-stressing shitsackiness elsewhere.

    Which brings me to my nxt point -- you said yourself that he is repeatedly tapering-down what he pays you. You have rightly picked up on the fact that his tapering-down isn't out of ignorance, or absentmindedness. He's doing it intentionally to see how much he can get away w/ for how little $$$ -- aka, seeking the 'Maximum Ego Boost via Max Permitted Disrespect for Lowest Possible Price'. You're describing him as 'consistent low-grade high-stress $$'. Sounds like the only thing that's truly consistent abt him, $$-wise, is that he's cutting back on how much he gives you. The only thing you would be turning your back on is a POS who is mainly getting his kicks by stressing you as much as he can, for as little as possible, & laughing at how thirsty he thinks you are bc you continue to tolerate it.

    There will always be new customers. It might take a while to find them, but you can't really work on finding those new customers if you're still wasting your time & sanity on this guy.

  13. #8
    God/dess Flickdreams's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Look behind you....
    Posts
    3,406
    Thanks
    5,155
    Thanked 4,132 Times in 1,638 Posts

  14. The Following User Says Thank You to Flickdreams For This Useful Post:


Similar Threads

  1. Help with a regular
    By summerbre in forum Hustle Hut
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 03-12-2013, 05:06 PM
  2. BA and the Regular . . .
    By Shy_Guy in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 112
    Last Post: 10-05-2009, 03:01 PM
  3. How to keep a regular??!
    By Celeste25 in forum Hustle Hut
    Replies: 34
    Last Post: 06-20-2006, 04:56 AM
  4. You Know You're A SC Regular When....
    By verfolgung in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 36
    Last Post: 06-18-2005, 06:35 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •