So today I was chatting w/ a dancer friend of mine that used to work with me, when during the convo she was saying some pretty cruel passive aggressive type stuff to me that left me feeling more depressed than before she called. She was telling me how the city she was currently in visiting was pretty good to her money wise & she had originally asked me to tag along but since I wasn't guaranteed a club that would hire me or a place to stay I didn't go. I had texted her pics of me to send to the club manager that she's known for a while & where she was going to work but she told me that he said no & that I should try (such & such) club instead. I didn't see the text so for all I know she was lying to me , I dunno. I know that this particular city is difficult to get hired in but I wanted to go just to escape california for awhile. Anyways so today she called me & we were chatting & she told me it was good over there money wise & I said are you sure he wouldn't hire me there bc she had told me that there were a few heavier type girls working there & that she was surpised to see them there. She then said that she had asked him again & his reply was "I'd have to see her in person". I asked her if there were girls there that had a similar build to me & she then went on to say in such a callous way that she had seen a few girls there that reminded her of me & that they were very"big boned" and one looked like a line backer w/ no boobs & another was just very tall, big boned & curvy like me. So after that I said well if those types are working there then I should have a shot bc I'm pretty hot (not being concieted) & have been hired at places with my current weight & body type. I carry my shit well. Anyways, she says ya we can try back in a couple of months after we tone up more & I can take you jogging, working out, etc.
I'm completely insulted by what she said bc I've never once told ANY of my overweight friends anything like that before regarding places to try getting hired. Maybe I'm too sensitive, I dunno, I just think that was uncalled for & that she was passively aggressively insulting me. Am I crazy? How would you take that?
Yes, I've been under alot of stress lately esp after leaving my abusive bf & having to live out of expensive hotels so I might just be overthinking shit but I dunno. After that conversation I hung up feeling more depressed than I did before she called. She's the type that has the "perfect life". By that I mean her bf pays for most of everything & she apparently gets to keep all her money except for her misc. bills she pays. Plus there's never any drama between them, at least none that she ever shares with me. I'm seriously wanting to cut her out of my life along with a few others that have nothing positive & uplifting to add to my life. All most people want to do is blame me for the stuff that's wrong in my life & that I need to get a "real" job blah blah or I need to lose weight. I seriously want to just disappear from everyone & delete them out of my life. I want a new circle of friends in my life. Do others really prey on the depressed & weak???



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