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Thread: First night jitters

  1. #1
    Veteran Member AlyssaJane's Avatar
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    Smiley First night jitters

    Hi everyone! First of all, I love you ladies and all the truly helpful tips and tricks you share on this site. Over the past few weeks I've been a sponge just soaking up all of your awesome knowledge, motivation, and antidotes. So last night was my first time camming. I did not expect to be sooooo nervous! I worked on being engaging, but I definitely need practice in the hustle aspect. There were a few missed opportunities where I did not even ask to close the deal, and I know you pros would have. Did you feel nervous your first time? How long did it take you to feel comfortable? How do you handle requests you are just **not** going to comply with? Any advise for newbs would be super helpful.

    Thanks in advance!!

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  3. #2
    Veteran Member qurl's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    Yes very nervous The more you cam the better your nerves will be. If someone has a request you do not want to do, say sorry, I don't do (insert activity), or if you sometimes do, I'm not up for (activity) right now. You don't owe any guy an explanation and if he persists, block.




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  5. #3
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    For me it has taken a FULL 3 weeks to get comfortable. I tried a few sites, I tried a few personalities. At the end of the day when I was 100% myself on a site that I clicked with immediately, everything fell into place. Now I'm excited to cam instead of nervous. What works for me may not work for you, but when someone asks me to do something I don't want to... I say no. If they ask again I say... I only do what I want, not what you want. If they ask again... I mock them mercilessly in front of everyone in my room until they leave. My sass makes me the most tips. That and my beautiful BBW curves. Keep trying new things. Cam every day. Never give up. Ban the ass hats and douche canoes that mouth off, let your regs worship you with endless compliments and money. The confidence comes quickly. 3 weeks from now you'll be so proud of yourself.

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    Veteran Member AlyssaJane's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    Thank you so much for the tips and encouragement! Call it performance anxiety - not really sure what I am supposed to be doing, but hopefully will get the hang of it with practice, and reading all the great advice on SW. I agree about being yourself, I think that is ultimately what will work for me as well, and saying no to things I'm really not comfortable with. At the end of the day, I chose this line of work to be my own boss, which includes the ability to say no/not tonight. Thank you again!

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    Veteran Member qurl's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    May I ask what site you're working on?




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    Veteran Member AlyssaJane's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    Starting on SM. After poking around on different sites I just liked it the most.

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    God/dess hyori's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

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  12. #8
    Veteran Member AlyssaJane's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    Amen hyori!

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    Default Re: First night jitters

    I havent been camming for long but have been for a few weeks and i always get nervous, although my anxiety really doesn't help the situation, anyone else the same?

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    Veteran Member AlyssaJane's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    I was super nervous at first, but now I have cammed the last 3 nights in a row and it I don't really feel those jitters nearly as much. I've been just treating it like a date with somebody I really like. I dress up like it's a date, I talk to them like I adore them, I ask a lot of questions in shows about what they are looking for. Thats just my personality to be a pleaser. I don't do as well with guys who want to be dominated or aren't sure what they want me to do. I've had a few off the wall requests but it's actually really fun for me. I'm pretty open minded and I like giving somebody a safe place to express their unusual desires.

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  17. #11
    Member BronzedAussie's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    I have only been on 4 times.
    I really only feel nervous when I am clothed and not 'doing' anything.
    I need to work on hustle and conversation, because At this point, If I can't think of something to say, I just smile, eye and slowly caress myself...and I'm pretty sure I look weird, stiting there grinning like a Cheshire Cat!
    What on earth do I talk about to fill the time between telling or asking them what they want to see and getting tokens to start the show!?!

    I really like camming so far, but the whole situation is very surreal and I am still getting used to it.
    Last edited by BronzedAussie; 04-08-2015 at 06:03 PM.

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  19. #12
    Member foxilla's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    I'm the same, it feels so awkward just sitting waiting, especially trying to think of things to say. Then you have to pretend your having a conversation with someone in private but really your just talking rubbish

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    Veteran Member ivybunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    1. If you're nervous, work it in! I actually get the best $/hr and customers when I'm bubbly (which is kind of annoying as I'm actually a huge misanthrope). My first week when I had the jitters, I actually got a much better % in chat because I was so nervous (re: cheery) and I had purdy awesome orgasms as opposed to now because the adrenaline was flowing. Also, your guys will be more forgiving with figgering out camera angles, whatnot as long as you're translating that nervousness into bubbliness.

    2. Despite being the happy, bubbly girl, I always say no when someone asks me for something I don't do (i.e, anal). I tell them there are a lot of amazing girls on here that do that, but unfortunately that's not something you offer. I know some people don't take no shit when someone asks for something but I find that staying in character is best since it doesn't make the rest of the room go "whoa, where the fuck did bubbly Ivy go?" Occasionally I get asked for raceplay of the derogatory nature and I just refer them to someone I know who is good and comfy with that. No use letting that karma go to waste. And the one time a guy eased into it in exclusive (started basically asking me to be fucked with his n****/Mand**** dick about 15 mins in) I straight up told him I would not say that, he could go ahead and say it, but that made me feel uncomfortable. Right as he was about to bust. Moodkiller if I ever heard one, right? The man took me exclusive 3 more times that SHIFT. He said it, I didn't, I stuck to positive, albeit throwing in the word "black" in there a couple times, and BAM! 150$ from one customer. He doesn't bug me about going further anymore either.

    Quote Originally Posted by AlyssaJane View Post
    I was super nervous at first, but now I have cammed the last 3 nights in a row and it I don't really feel those jitters nearly as much. I've been just treating it like a date with somebody I really like. I dress up like it's a date, I talk to them like I adore them, I ask a lot of questions in shows about what they are looking for. Thats just my personality to be a pleaser. I don't do as well with guys who want to be dominated or aren't sure what they want me to do. I've had a few off the wall requests but it's actually really fun for me. I'm pretty open minded and I like giving somebody a safe place to express their unusual desires.
    3. Sounds like your hustle is similar to mine! Tbh, I don't ask to close the deal unless it's REAL slow. I find that I actually get a lot of guys that like to scope the girl out first, hang out, see what she's like, and then become great regs. As a people pleaser, just keep in mind that you don't want to become bullied or trolled. One of the hardest hurdles I had to go through was not wanting to go further and further with pleasing someone. Be firm and if you're upselling, it's a SALES technique. Don't give them something extra once they've already paid, unless you've mentioned that you'll be doing so. The point is to increase your sales, and if they're already happy, they'll come back anyway without the freebies.

    4. Finally, decide on a prototype of a show when someone doesn't really know what they want you to do/gives you a generic answer. I had trouble with that and floundering around not knowing what to do is not sexy. They want to feel like you want to get off, so give em what they want. Slowly.


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    Veteran Member gypsy1's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    I'm with you guys. I just started camming and it feels so damn awkward just sitting there trying to think of something to say. My mind goes blank. I'm slooooowly getting more comfortable behind the cam. The other night I told myself I was just going to fake it until I make it and hope that it will eventually become natural. Before I started camming I spent a lot of time reading through these forums and the one piece of advice that I read over and over was to be yourself. I tried this earlier today and it worked. My real personality came out. I felt comfortable and had fun. I had actual convos with some of the guys. More guys spoke to me even if they didn't stay very long. And the ones that didn't speak lurked for a few minutes instead of just popping in and out. This is the one thing I love about camming. I can truly be myself. This is so much easier on me and less draining. And the guys like it apparently.

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  24. #15
    Member PeterPan's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    I'm starting tomorrow late afternoon, Thursday!! (I'm in the U.S., Streamate) *gulp*

    I'm both excited and anxious. It feels like the first day of school. I have everything prepared, ready to sit in the front row. ;p Lol.

    I hope I don't fuck up. I'm going to set my Streamate rates as $4.99private/$5.99exc. because I'm sexy and intelligent (it's what I keep telling myself).

    I do have a question: I only have one toy. It's a glass dildo, nothing special. Will that be ok? Like, could that potentially affect customers? Having only one toy?

    Also, I'll return here with a post on my experience. Reading everyone's advice is fantastic, thanks so much!

  25. #16
    Member BronzedAussie's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    You are just starting out, I'm sure they won't care that you only have one toy and you will likely find that your collection grows over time.

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  27. #17
    Veteran Member AlyssaJane's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    Quote Originally Posted by ivybunny View Post
    4. Finally, decide on a prototype of a show when someone doesn't really know what they want you to do/gives you a generic answer. I had trouble with that and floundering around not knowing what to do is not sexy. They want to feel like you want to get off, so give em what they want. Slowly.
    Thank you thank you for this advise!! It saved my butt tonight. I had several shows tonight where they didn't really know what they wanted so I just took control and did what I like seeing in a porno, it worked every time. I am definitely getting more confident in my hustle, and it's getting more fun every day.

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  29. #18
    Veteran Member AlyssaJane's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    I thought I would need a ton of toys to get started. Boy was I wrong. Only one session ever asked to see the vibrator. The majority of my shows they just want to see me from behind, and if a toy is present they tend to like the dildo over my vibrator. I do get requests for lifelike dildos, so that will be my next toy. I think it adds to the fun of my room if I have something new I am excited to use. A week from now those jitters will be gone and you will have a better idea of what you need. I wasn't sure what my specialties would be but it really starts to work itself out as you see why people come in your room.

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  31. #19
    Member foxilla's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    I've been camming for a few weeks and still dont have any toys yet, no one has ever complained

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  33. #20
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    Quote Originally Posted by foxilla View Post
    I've been camming for a few weeks and still dont have any toys yet, no one has ever complained
    right? I've only been on about a week but I'm loving it. Wishing I'd done this 10 years ago.

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  35. #21
    Veteran Member AlyssaJane's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    So lots of questions. Where are you seeing your subtotal earned? From your SM dashboard, click the my earnings tab (that number IS your cut.) Then you can select to see all your earnings for the week. Next to each day is a clickable details link. You can then see your customers, what they paid, and what your cut is for each session. While you are in free chat you can view the same info, just click the recent earnings link at the top of the page. From there you can click the customers names to add notes about each one. It's really helpful when they come back for more and you remember their specific kink. You didn't do anything wrong, it takes time to build up your regulars. I get the men logging in and out too. I figure they are just window shopping, (or broke hoping for a free flash). And don't worry too much about somebody leaving for whatever reason. Sometimes I have found its good to be slightly preoccupied. Then they pay for me to get my undivided attention. I got the panties email too, and I've found it is an absolute no no to sell them from the site, give personal info, or drive any traffic away from the site. I did however learn from the streamate thread that we can have a modelcentro page link on our streamate site, since they are affiliated, and that modelcentro page can sell panties, link to your amazon wishlist, upload your own content. Don't lose heart. Keep practicing with what works for you and my best piece of advise is to LOVE IT. Love what you do and the customers feed off that energy and can't resist you.

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  37. #22
    Veteran Member AngeXx's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    Quote Originally Posted by foxilla View Post
    I've been camming for a few weeks and still dont have any toys yet, no one has ever complained
    ^This exactly. You don't have to use toys if you don't want to. It's all about your persona and what you what you offer!

  38. #23
    Member PeterPan's Avatar
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    Default Re: First night jitters

    I ended up deleting my post. It was typed with post-session anxiety and tiredness. Lol.

    Thanks so much for reading that crazy, hot mess of a post. And thanks for the modelcentro advice. I'll look into that.

    I actually e-mailed Support about the panty business and me not knowing. They replied and said I wouldn't be penalized. *whew*!!

    Oh, and you're totally right about my earnings. I like, mind-fucked myself with my miscalculations and misunderstanding. Haha. I think my anxiety was clouding my math intellect. :p

    -----

    This was my second day. The weirdest thing that happened was this woman took me to exclusive and tried to persuade me to get my dog to lick my hooha! I was able to make the conversation last by being intrigued and asking questions. She was like, "the other girls do it" when I told her I can't because of Streamate legal restrictions. She has her dog do it to her all the time. 2nd day and I got a taste of a bestiality fetish.
    Last edited by PeterPan; 04-11-2015 at 12:18 AM. Reason: additional

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