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Thread: Teaching... What would you do?

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    Default Teaching... What would you do?

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    Last edited by seashell; 08-05-2015 at 08:32 PM.

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Why not just keep teaching? Obviously, you passed the background check for licensing and to get hired, do you really think they'll do a super in depth one for no reason now? Just enjoy it, keep your mouth shut, and-if you believe in a higher power-pray to them that the past stays in the past.
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    Quote Originally Posted by xStacey View Post
    Close contact, for an hour, for $40? And I guess I'll have to make conversation with them too?

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Quote Originally Posted by seashell View Post
    It's been a long time since I posted here. Basically, in an effort to get away from stripping, taking the advice of friends and loved ones, I went back to school for a master's degree. I'm now a teacher. I teach first graders at an amazing school.

    I am 100% aware, and have been for a long time, that this probably wasn't the best career choice. I actually developed an eating disorder from stress, worried that I was getting myself into a predicament where I would one day be fired. Teachers get fired for doing far less, and I've heard of teachers fired specifically for having done sex work in the past. I live in fear of people finding out my past, and think about the possibility of losing my job every day.

    Yeah. Um. I think I know exactly what you will tell me -- just quit -- but I would like any input on how to do so. I can't be fully honest with my boss, so I think I will just say I want to change fields and I want better benefits (we have low pay and no retirement at my current job, so I think that is reasonable). I don't know what to tell my coworkers. I want to be honest, but I also don't want to burn bridges if I ever need a professional reference. I also don't know what to tell my family, because they are so proud of me, and they don't know about my past.

    What would you do?

    I may delete this in the future, for privacy reasons. Thank you in advance... <3
    Try not to worry so much. Ever heard of the self fulfilling prophecy?

    If this really worries you then maybe you can transfer and try teaching older students like college level or maybe try your own business as a tutor then no one can fire you. I think people freak out more about sex workers - past or current - when it comes to young impressionable kids.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    I also think you are worrying too much, you obviously passed the background checks. If you're talking about stripping, I think you're pretty much in the clear. Webcam is obviously different.

    I work with a girl who works with elementary kids and still dances, and have another friend teaching high school math who says I'd have no problem once past the initial criminal check. Just don't continue doing it while teaching.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Just because something bad can happen does mean it will happen. Most people who were never dancers have something in their past that they hope no one will find out about, that would negatively affect their job or marriage or whatever. Most people in positions of authority realize that people are not perfect, and that were they to find out that you were once a [gasp] stripper it would affect their career as much as yours.

    It is easy to sit on the other side of a computer screen and say relax, but really, relax.

    Everyones life involves to some extent balancing not caring what other people think, but understanding that what other people think affects them. You have pushed over to where you are worrying about what other people think.


    You are not a criminal
    You are not a predator
    You are not a danger to society


    In this life, some of the people that you meet will be those things

    It is a common situation where we focus on our own imperfections, and because of our lack of knowledge of others imperfections, assume them to be perfect. I assure you this is not the case.

    Go into work tomorrow and say hello to the philanderers, tax cheats, gays on the down low, shoplifters, porn addicts, former gang members, chronic masturbators, wife beaters, unindicted co conspirators, husband beaters, and forgers.

    Those are just your bosses

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

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    Last edited by seashell; 08-05-2015 at 08:35 PM.

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Rumors and gossip can often be dismissed as just talk. In some areas, teachers are hard to come by, so not every school board is eagerly willing to fire someone over what is now a common thing in America (slanderous talk and social media harrassment.)

    I know Religious schools are different but that's an entirely different world than public schools.

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Isn't there some kind of harassment law you could press charges with? That's basically slander, especially if it caused issues with your job.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    given your current situation, I would think that there are only two significant 'risk factors' ...

    - some dip$#!t remembers you from your stripper days, and makes it a point to 'out' you to the school

    - when your 10 year state teacher's license renewal comes up, the state professional licensing agency does a new in-depth background check ... and somehow dredges up something related to your past work as a 'stripper'.

    As a dancer ( as opposed to a camgirl ), as long as you don't have adult themed pictures floating around the internet, and as long as you don't have 1099's issued by well known strip clubs in your tax records, it's extremely unlikely that you'll be 'outed' during any future in-depth background check.

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    FWIW -- most states have laws that indicate when a school can terminate a teacher's employment (in general these laws will not be applicable if you teach at a private or parochial school, but those institutions usually follow similar rules). Although it is true that teachers can be terminated for immoral conduct or conduct unbecoming of the position, in general that refers to conduct that takes place while they are teaching. So the fact that you happened to be a stripper sometime in the past, before you started teaching, would not be relevant. It would be different if you committed crimes in the past (which stripping obviously is not), or if you lied on your background check (so, i would not recommend that).

    It does not sound like your position is a union job (otherwise I would think that your benefits would be a lot better). If it is, or if you could get one, there would be even more hurdles to a school district letting you go. If you can find a union position, I think that would also solve some of your problems with compensation. Teachers will never be rolling in the big bucks, but at least where i am, they make $40-70K for the nine month school year, with decent pension and health benefits. That's not bad.

    Setting aside the legal/technical stuff, I understand that there is also the morality police out there. I seem to recall a hub-bub some years ago when Sasha Gray did some storybook reading to some 2nd graders in LA. I think some concerned parents were bitching about a porn star being in the school. And so they jumped all over her as if she was going to infect their kids.

    Screw those people. I am a parent. I am keenly interested in the quality of their teachers, but I am focused on how well the teachers are teaching my kids. Some teachers have the love, and others don't. When teachers get to the "i don't give a shit anymore" stage, they become very bad teachers. When teachers are in the "i love what i do and am going to work hard at it" stage, they are worth their weight in gold. And if I have got a person like that teaching my kid, I couldn't give a crap less what they happened to do when they were a youngster. Not that being a stripper in the past is that bad anyway -- hell i go to strip clubs right now, and i don't think that makes me immoral or a perv. Well, maybe a little pervy, but whateva.

    So just do your best, enjoy your job, and try not to worry about the other stuff. If you are a good teacher, parents will definitely notice and you will be well liked.

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    I guess it *would* be slander... never thought of it like that.

    I was a camgirl and I did have 1099's from a local well known strip club... my taxes show that I was an independent contractor/entertainer... but I always pass background checks. I took down any webcam stuff/photos a long time ago, and I haven't been able to find any traces of that when I google myself, so hopefully no one else will.

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Quote Originally Posted by nmcbrain View Post
    FWIW -- most states have laws that indicate when a school can terminate a teacher's employment (in general these laws will not be applicable if you teach at a private or parochial school, but those institutions usually follow similar rules). Although it is true that teachers can be terminated for immoral conduct or conduct unbecoming of the position, in general that refers to conduct that takes place while they are teaching. So the fact that you happened to be a stripper sometime in the past, before you started teaching, would not be relevant. It would be different if you committed crimes in the past (which stripping obviously is not), or if you lied on your background check (so, i would not recommend that).

    It does not sound like your position is a union job (otherwise I would think that your benefits would be a lot better). If it is, or if you could get one, there would be even more hurdles to a school district letting you go. If you can find a union position, I think that would also solve some of your problems with compensation. Teachers will never be rolling in the big bucks, but at least where i am, they make $40-70K for the nine month school year, with decent pension and health benefits. That's not bad.

    Setting aside the legal/technical stuff, I understand that there is also the morality police out there. I seem to recall a hub-bub some years ago when Sasha Gray did some storybook reading to some 2nd graders in LA. I think some concerned parents were bitching about a porn star being in the school. And so they jumped all over her as if she was going to infect their kids.

    Screw those people. I am a parent. I am keenly interested in the quality of their teachers, but I am focused on how well the teachers are teaching my kids. Some teachers have the love, and others don't. When teachers get to the "i don't give a shit anymore" stage, they become very bad teachers. When teachers are in the "i love what i do and am going to work hard at it" stage, they are worth their weight in gold. And if I have got a person like that teaching my kid, I couldn't give a crap less what they happened to do when they were a youngster. Not that being a stripper in the past is that bad anyway -- hell i go to strip clubs right now, and i don't think that makes me immoral or a perv. Well, maybe a little pervy, but whateva.

    So just do your best, enjoy your job, and try not to worry about the other stuff. If you are a good teacher, parents will definitely notice and you will be well liked.
    Thank you for this. My area is very conservative, and there is definitely the sense of a morality police. My state doesn't have unions, but that would be nice. I work at a charter school, and basically traded lower pay for a better place to work. Most parents do like me, and I am a hard worker. I know my employers and coworkers like me. Hopefully everything will work out...

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Quote Originally Posted by Selina M View Post
    Isn't there some kind of harassment law you could press charges with? That's basically slander, especially if it caused issues with your job.

    I am fairly certain slander must be materially untrue. However to the OP; as long as you don't have posted photos online there is really no chance of anyone finding out.. even if this guy outed you he has no proof and no one from the school board is going to call a club and verify if you used to work there as it's an invasion of privacy and since they are not calling for a reference or verification of current employment, the club is very unlikely to release this info anyway.
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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Quote Originally Posted by Selina M View Post
    Isn't there some kind of harassment law you could press charges with? That's basically slander, especially if it caused issues with your job.

    I am fairly certain slander must be materially untrue. However to the OP; as long as you don't have posted photos online there is really no chance of anyone finding out.. even if this guy outed you he has no proof and no one from the school board is going to call a club and verify if you used to work there as it's an invasion of privacy and since they are not calling for a reference or verification of current employment, the club is very unlikely to release this info anyway.
    XoXo Gia
    Danielle Fishell (the Dish): "If the Super-Star thing doesn't work out, Gia makes a great stripper name"

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Oops. Sorry about the double post.
    XoXo Gia
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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    I don't know. Even if that's the case for that technical term, I would still imagine if a guy were to make some lies up (which is all it is without him providing solid proof) and cause her to lose her job, she could still sue the guy for something.
    Of course, the goal is to never let it reach that point anyway.

    OP, I would just clean up any presence you had online and maybe routinely check for your stage/usernames/descriptors on tube sites, in case someone posts an old copy of a webcam video.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    Although it is true that teachers can be terminated for immoral conduct or conduct unbecoming of the position, in general that refers to conduct that takes place while they are teaching. So the fact that you happened to be a stripper sometime in the past, before you started teaching, would not be relevant.

    ummm ... not exactly ...



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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    If you listen to the clip I think you will find that it is consistent with what I said -- even fox news, that paragon of legal advice, said that having a past as an adult entertainer is not grounds for dismissal for cause. If you google "teacher fired for being a stripper", you will find many stories that are also consistent with that. The key distinction is whether the adult work was done before the person became a teacher, versus whether the adult work is done while a teacher (either moonlighting at night or during summer break). If you were a stripper before you became a teacher, and didn't lie about it in applications, etc., then that work is not relevant as a legal matter for establishing cause for dismissal. You are on much shakier ground if you are stripping while you are a teacher.

    What this story is talking about is what I said in my post about the morality police -- concerned parents who want someone out. The best defense for that is being a good teacher. Plenty of people will come to your support if there is a furor. And she has a good story to tell -- she didn't have a lot of money growing up, she did what she needed to do to survive (and didn't commit any crimes in doing so), she got a higher education all the way up to a masters degree, and now she is a successful teacher. What is the problem with that? Heck that is the American way.

    OP works at a charter school, and so the laws establishing standards for dismissal likely do not technically apply to her. She is probably an at will employee like most of the rest of us vanilla folks. But the dynamics are the same -- keep her head down, stay positive, work hard, and shit tends to work out.

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    I also hope that things work out for you!

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    What I find absurd is that if a kid finds your webcam video... okay, they tell other kids. Me personally would be like "Oh you found my video? Thanks for letting me know you were jacking off last night. Where's your homework?" If the principal/administration just ignored it, it would die down and the kids would move on to something else within a week.
    It's the parents that blow the fuck up about it most of the time, and I think they're being ridiculous. There are so many other issues in education for parents to worry about, there's a friggin teacher shortage, and instead they're gonna play witch hunt on an existing teacher that they had no issues with until this point.
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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    I would consider shutting down all social media sites, and opening new ones with a different name. For example my face book has my middle name and my gradmothers maiden name. It also has a different city listed. The picture i use on my facebook and twitter is of me in big suglasses and a baseball cap standing a ways from camera. Your husband also needs to be careful to not post pictures of you on his social media. This can help the world seem less small.
    "Can we read it on the Smoking Gun? "

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    I also wanted to add this. Because i had a stalker ex in the past all my family and friends refer to me by a nickname on social media. Even my husband does this. This also helps break the chain of who can find you online.
    "Can we read it on the Smoking Gun? "

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    What this story is talking about is what I said in my post about the morality police -- concerned parents who want someone out. The best defense for that is being a good teacher. Plenty of people will come to your support if there is a furor. And she has a good story to tell -- she didn't have a lot of money growing up, she did what she needed to do to survive (and didn't commit any crimes in doing so), she got a higher education all the way up to a masters degree, and now she is a successful teacher. What is the problem with that?
    The 'problem' with that is bad PR ... which can reflect badly on the school's reputation, which can have direct or behind the scenes effects putting the school's future sources of funding at risk, etc. Ultimately, the financial survival of any school is tied to the willingness of parents to pay tuition, to the willingness of local 'officials' to allocate school budgets / contracts, etc. Put another way, one phone call by the mayor to the school administrator can instantly 'undo' the public support of a few dozen local residents. School administrators can replace one teacher far more easily than they can replace $500,000 in lost government contract payments or tuition payments.

    In the case of my industry 'acquaintance' in the above video, she quickly decided to quit her school job due to the relentless pressure from local media ... who published her real name, real address, etc. Attempting to keep her job would have involved a very 'public' battle - which would have ruined her future opportunities to get hired at any other school, as well as her becoming subject to being fired from her existing school job for any other reason that school officials could 'conjure up'.
    Last edited by Melonie; 04-15-2015 at 03:36 AM.

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    Default Re: Teaching... What would you do?

    How close do you live and work now to the club where you used to dance? Is there a risk that someone will recognized you from the club, like dads or teachers? If so, would you and your husband consider moving someplace new? Maybe, you would feel more relaxed in a fresh new setting.

    Quote Originally Posted by seashell View Post
    Thanks so much, everyone. <3 I feel a lot better.

    Before you think I have no basis for worrying, there was something that happened. A guy I dated a few years ago while I was stripping, who happens to be a teacher, came in contact with me again on facebook... A few years ago, he told people at my vanilla job that I was a stripper, and it was really hard for me to deal with. Turns out he knows my current boyfriend through work and somehow wound up in his fantasy football league. Small world. :\ I've been freaking out inside about him possibly telling people again, especially because he's a teacher.
    Did you meet this guy in the strip club? If so, he is a predatory pervert that likes to fondle teenage girls, and he cannot be trusted to teach girls. -- Okay, I do not really believe that, but, that is what could be said (by the morality inquisitors) about a male teacher that goes to strip clubs. You have as much dirt on him as he has on you. Call me a hypocrite, but, even I would not want my 17-year old daughter to be in a class with a teacher that spends his evenings fondling girls as young as 18, in a stripclub. (On the other hand, I feel no threat or uneasiness whatsoever with regards to a female teacher that was formerly a stripper.)

    If he threatens you, you should make it clear to him, that, if he does anything to put your job in jeopardy, you will retaliate in full force, and his attack would result in 'mutually assured destruction'.
    Last edited by jack0177057; 04-21-2015 at 06:36 PM.
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