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Thread: sugar daddy dilemma

  1. #1
    Senior Member Graci's Avatar
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    Default sugar daddy dilemma

    Hey Ladies,

    I'm having kind of a moral dilemma, and I don't know how to deal with it.

    For a while I had a regular customer who was amazing. He would book me out for whole nights at a time, take me to dinner and shows, and generally treat me like a princess.

    Over the last month he's progressively gotten more and more needy. He started paying me to see him outside of work, to go for dinner and walks. He's sweet, and pretty harmless so I felt safe doing it. He lost his whole family five years ago, and mostly he's just lonely and wants to cuddle. Eventually he paid me $2000 to just spend the night cuddling in his bed. No sex, nothing even close. I had clothes on the whole time.

    He eventually got to be too high maintenance, though. Needing constant texting throughout the day, showing up at my work to see me and spending nothing, calling me his girlfriend, saying he loves me, and the last few times we went out to dinner he made mention of wanting sex.

    I tried to break it off with him, saying I'm too busy with work and family (sick brother and nephew to look after). His response was to offer to pay me enough to take a month off of work.

    The club has been so slow lately, I could really use this money. I feel weird accepting it from someone who obviously thinks our relationship is different from what it actually is, and I don't know how to handle it if he pushes for sex. I'm not worried about safety, I don't think he would ever try to hurt me.

    I don't know. I feel so weird about the whole situation.

    Any advice from ladies with sugar daddies?

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  3. #2
    Banned Melonie's Avatar
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    Default Re: sugar daddy dilemma

    Ultimately, this probably boils down to two questions you need to ask yourself.

    - are you comfortable devoting virtually 100% of your attention to fulfilling the needs ( sexual and otherwise ) of this one guy ? He's obviously the 'exclusive attention' type, offering to pay you to stop working at your club, and ultimately expecting you to devote all of your attention towards him day and night.

    - are you prepared for the 'aftermath' once this guy runs out of money ? Unless the guy is a multi millionaire, sooner or later the day will arrive when he can no longer 'afford' you ... prompting a decision on your part to keep providing your 'attention' for free versus breaking things off . At that point, all sorts of bizarre things might be possible, from potential suicide threats to 'revenge' being taken against you.

    IMHO this guy's actions indicate he isn't capable of understanding the limits of a 'pay for play' SD / SB relationship. Just my personal impression, but this guy doesn't seem the type to be satisfied with a GFE ... and instead is utilizing money as 'bait' to attract and maintain your attention for long enough to try and convert you into his 'real life' GF. Again just my personal judgment, but such situations typically end badly. And especially so if the girl has taken a significant amount of money 'up front', has completely played along with the guy's GFE scenario, but eventually 'hits the guy over the head' with the fact that the supposed relationship the guy has imagined has in fact been strictly 'pay for play' from the beginning ... and must abruptly terminate once the guy no longer has money left to spend as before.
    Last edited by Melonie; 05-24-2015 at 05:15 AM.

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    God/dess DesuvsDeath's Avatar
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    Default Re: sugar daddy dilemma

    Quote Originally Posted by Melonie View Post
    IMHO this guy's actions indicate he isn't capable of understanding the limits of a 'pay for play' SD / SB relationship. Just my personal impression, but this guy doesn't seem the type to be satisfied with a GFE ... and instead is utilizing money as 'bait' to attract and maintain your attention for long enough to try and convert you into his 'real life' GF. Again just my personal judgment, but such situations typically end badly.
    Exactly this. I'm not saying don't do it... but be prepared to treat the end of the month like a RL break up rather than the end of a business agreement.
    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    i am losing my fucking mind and i really just want this chloroform dream because i think that would just get me right with jesus.

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    Banned Melonie's Avatar
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    Default Re: sugar daddy dilemma

    be prepared to treat the end of the month like a RL break up rather than the end of a business agreement
    Not wanting to make matters any worse than they actually might turn out to be, but this scenario potentially involves the worst of 'both worlds'. On the RL breakup side, the guy is likely to be emotionally devastated when forced to acknowledge that his GFE experience wasn't the 'real thing'. And on the financial side, the guy is likely to feel angry that he has been 'screwed over' by the girl accepting significant amounts of his money under 'false pretenses' ... even though those 'false pretenses' we only in the guy's mind the entire time ! However, both can lead to a potentially volatile situation when the time finally arrives where the girl must 'set the guy straight'.

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    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
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    Default Re: sugar daddy dilemma

    Just my 2 cents but I would not see him in private 1 on 1 cause he seems like he would get the wrong idea. Like if you go out with him to dinner, movies, etc. cool. But he is definitely getting too comfortable and forgetting you are still working and must maintain a level of professionalism. Like put these otc excursions on time frames.

    And he maybe be acting all needy because now he's trying to 'cash out' so to speak and get sex now that he's spent a significant amount and he wanted to make sure you don't run off before he gets his needs met.

    Some guys see women like 'investments' and after putting in so much money they eventually want a return on said investment - most likely something sexual.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: sugar daddy dilemma

    This is after he showed up at the club spending no money on you or after, you have seen him and hes given you money? He could very easily drug you or harm you, too make you have sex with him. He should not be showing up at the club like that. He seems to think you are his girlfriend and sounds like it will get worse. At this point he does feel you owe him something, thats the part you should worry about!

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    Banned Melonie's Avatar
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    Default Re: sugar daddy dilemma

    Just my 2 cents but I would not see him in private 1 on 1 cause he seems like he would get the wrong idea
    he paid me $2000 to just spend the night cuddling in his bed. No sex, nothing even close
    ... the OP has already crossed that line ... thus making the existence of a 'misunderstanding' on the guy's part a virtual certainty. This is already evidenced by the guy showing up at her club and expecting additional attention without spending additional money.

    However, if a 'misunderstanding' already appears to exist, the question then becomes whether or not the OP wants to risk making the 'misunderstanding' even deeper ... in exchange for a lot more of this guy's money.

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    Default Re: sugar daddy dilemma

    Quote Originally Posted by Graci View Post
    He eventually got to be too high maintenance, though. Needing constant texting throughout the day, showing up at my work to see me and spending nothing, calling me his girlfriend, saying he loves me, and the last few times we went out to dinner he made mention of wanting sex.
    Whenever he shows up to the club, you tell him he needs to spend money on you because the club it's your job. If he does not do that, cut him off.





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  13. #9
    Senior Member Graci's Avatar
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    Default Re: sugar daddy dilemma

    Thanks, ladies. This is all really good advice.

    I've decided not to accept the money, for all the reasons you've listed here. I'm going to tell him he can only come see me at the club, and only if he books me or tips me for my time.

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