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Thread: Penthouse NYC

  1. #1
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    Travel Penthouse NYC

    Can you have a real relationship with an entertainer? I fell in love with a woman who worked as an entertainer. I thought she was exceptionally kind and beautiful. I asked for her phone number the first night we met. We spoke over the phone, we texted and I visited her at work over the course of a year. I eventually told her about my feelings for her, and she said I was cute and that she liked me. I asked her if she would date me, but she was hesitant: she told me she wasn't so sure about that. We promised to be friends forever. We met went on a few dates outside of work, and she eventually told me she loved me too. She told me that she was busy taking care of her son, and that was why she couldn't see me every day, or that's why she missed my calls or respond to my texts a day or two later. I really loved her and although it frustrated me that I couldn't see or speak to her as often as I wanted, I tried to forgive her for these details and just enjoy those precious moments I did spend with her.

    After dating for about 4-5 months, I found out that the address she had given me wasn't where she lived. When I called her to ask for an explanation, she got really upset and called me crazy, and accused me of hallucinating or seeing things that weren't real. She told me she wanted to take a break. I was really in love with her at the time--I believed that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I felt so crushed and heartbroken that I offered to buy her that bag she really wanted if she would just forgive me. I kept trying to get her to give me another chance, but I am pretty sure she blocked my number within a few weeks after dumping me.

    I don't know how to get a sense of closure or resolve my feelings about what happened. There are a lot of questions in my head--I don't think she really loved me, but I think part of me hopes it was real. I really want to believe that she is a good person, but I feel like I was just a chump to her the whole time. I guess I'm not sure what I'm looking for by posting this here. I feel sick when I think about what happened. I think I want to know why she did what she did, and who she really is, and what was fake and what was real. But I don't know that I could believe anything she said if I saw her again.

    Please, I would appreciate any advice on how to handle a situation like this. I don't want to hurt this person. I'm trying to forgive her, but I am really struggling. I feel as though I don't know anything about her--I don't think she gave me a real first name. I feel a lot of pain because I feel like I lost something truly significant. Sorry if this post is somewhat vague--I didn't want to hurt anyone by providing too much detail. I would really appreciate it if you could be gentle and considerate in your response. I'm still sensitive about what happened.

  2. #2
    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    First of all ----- NEVER fall in love in the club. If you do realize that only rare instances do genuine long term relationships develop (like less than 3%).

    Second. She didn't seem that into you if she was responding days later. Maybe she had lots of responsibilities and what not but If you made it worth her while she would have responded faster.

    I don't think you were hallucinating, she should not have told you she loved you and should not have given you a fake address knowing good and [email protected] well she didn't live there. She should have told you the truth, that maybe she liked you but was not comfortable with you coming to her home.

    Handle it by shaking this off and meeting new ladies and go from there....
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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  4. #3
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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    You need to move on and forget about her. You were not in love with her, just a fantasy that you created in your head. Did you meet her family? Did you meet her non-work friends? Did you hang out with her at her house? Did you know her son? These would be the bare minimums to even beginning a real relationship. Remember, girls in these clubs create a persona to entertain us. As miss.a.p1000 said: NEVER fall in love in the club. Another tip, if a girl tells you that she likes you as a friend, don't waste time trying to turn it into a romantic relationship. It's better to find someone that has that "spark" with you from the beginning.

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    God/dess rickdugan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    It sounds like a classic romance hustle. She led you on so that you would keep coming to the club and spending on her. There is nothing to "handle" here except for your own emotions. You either walk away or keep getting jerked around.

    IME guys who are lonely and inexperienced with strip clubs seem to be the most susceptible to this type of hustle. They really want to believe that these girls really like them and simply cannot imagine that a girl could simulate interest and affection that convincingly. Well, now you know the reality, which is that she didn't really like you and she could quite adeptly simulate real affection.

    This was a lesson learned and what you paid her over the past year was tuition. Don't fall in love in a strip club. Normal societal conventions don't apply there. It is their job to make you like them and want to spend on them. The only person in a strip club who has any responsibility for safeguarding your emotions and finances is you. I've seen more than a few guys go broke over the years chasing the affections of strippers and even witnessed one guy sobbing once when he realized that he had been played.

    Good luck.
    Last edited by rickdugan; 06-17-2015 at 06:04 AM.

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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    What does this have to do with Penthouse NYC?





    Quote Originally Posted by Miss_Red View Post
    Audritwo's asshole sees all, knows all. Spurs on armies of orcs. Casts fear into the dwindling races of Middle-Earth. Fears hobbits.

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  10. #6
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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    Quote Originally Posted by audritwo View Post
    What does this have to do with Penthouse NYC?
    I think that's were he met this lady.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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  12. #7
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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    The way to handle it is to realize that it was never real. It will hurt and you'll feel like it was a big waste of time, money and emotions but eventually you'll get over it as long as you move on from it and don't dwell on it. I don't think anyone deserves to get played like this, even if they are naive enough to look for love in the club, but you now seem to understand what happened. It's on you from here on out whether you really want to get over this or if you let it break you.

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  14. #8
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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    I'm always so confused by these threads. Why not just ASK the girl outright what her intentions are? Say something like "_____, I'd love to keep seeing you and spending money on you in the club. You don't have to hang out with me OTC in order for me to continue coming in to see you at work. That said, I also really like you as a person and would love to see you OTC if you are interested in me on a personal level. Would you prefer to keep having a great time with me in the club? Or would you prefer to start seeing me on a personal basis?" You could even further clarify that if you start seeing her OTC, you'll stop spending money on her in the club, since you'd see that as a personal relationship rather than a professional one, and you like to keep the two separate. This is easily something that could be sent in a text or email.

    Why are people so afraid to communicate with each other? Why do people go through the trouble of finding a forum like this one and typing out their entire situation for an audience of strangers rather than simply confronting the person they care about?!

    >_<

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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    I'm always so confused by these threads. Why not just ASK the girl outright what her intentions are? Say something like "_____, I'd love to keep seeing you and spending money on you in the club. You don't have to hang out with me OTC in order for me to continue coming in to see you at work. That said, I also really like you as a person and would love to see you OTC if you are interested in me on a personal level. Would you prefer to keep having a great time with me in the club? Or would you prefer to start seeing me on a personal basis?" You could even further clarify that if you start seeing her OTC, you'll stop spending money on her in the club, since you'd see that as a personal relationship rather than a professional one, and you like to keep the two separate. This is easily something that could be sent in a text or email.

    Why are people so afraid to communicate with each other? Why do people go through the trouble of finding a forum like this one and typing out their entire situation for an audience of strangers rather than simply confronting the person they care about?!

    >_<
    IMHO it is because they are afraid of being rejected and having their hopes dashed. IMO it's the same reason that a guy "friend" hangs around a girl that he is really pining for, yet never finds the courage to say something. I think that many of these guys know, at some emotional or intellectual level, that their odds aren't good and that these girls don't think of them that way, so they maintain the status quo rather than jeopardizing whatever time and attention they already have.

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  18. #10
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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    Penthouse is where this happened.

    @NoRegrets: You're right. I kept asking her to come and my my family. I kept asking to meet her family too, but she wouldn't let me see them. I did meet one of her non-work friends. I even know her friend's real name. I did not hang out with her at her house, as she kept saying she didn't want to hang out there.

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    I'm always so confused by these threads. Why not just ASK the girl outright what her intentions are? Say something like "_____, I'd love to keep seeing you and spending money on you in the club. You don't have to hang out with me OTC in order for me to continue coming in to see you at work. That said, I also really like you as a person and would love to see you OTC if you are interested in me on a personal level. Would you prefer to keep having a great time with me in the club? Or would you prefer to start seeing me on a personal basis?" You could even further clarify that if you start seeing her OTC, you'll stop spending money on her in the club, since you'd see that as a personal relationship rather than a professional one, and you like to keep the two separate. This is easily something that could be sent in a text or email.

    Why are people so afraid to communicate with each other? Why do people go through the trouble of finding a forum like this one and typing out their entire situation for an audience of strangers rather than simply confronting the person they care about?!

    >_<
    I'm assuming OTC is short for outside the club. I did express all of these feelings. We did go on dates outside the club in Manhattan. We talked about getting married. We talked about having children. I asked her if she would want to live with me in California, as I did not want to stay in New York. She expressed her desire to live with me. I wrote her poems expressing my love to her. I did stop spending money on her in the club. She even asked me not to go back there. We stopped meeting at her place of work completely once we started seeing each other outside the club. I didn't want her to work there anymore, so I helped her when she asked me for help; she told me she was supporting not only her son but also some family members who were very ill with severe chronic disease. I wrote here because I didn't know where else to turn: the woman I wrote about refuses to speak with me. The policy at this club is also not to reveal any information about the people who work there. Also, I am not interested in becoming a stalker.


    @bobblehead & @Miss.a.p1600 I really appreciate what you said. Thank you for your kindness.

    Thanks everyone for the good wishes. I am doing my best to move on.

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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    I'm really sorry..you sound like a nice guy. Hope you find someone that cares for you, & deserves you. Take care.


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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  22. #12
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    Default Re: Penthouse NYC

    This never happens to me because I'm more business than the girl usually. I almost feel bad if they waste too much time talking to me at the bar because I want a dance as soon as possible lol.

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