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Thread: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

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    Default Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

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    Last edited by Raven88; 10-16-2022 at 12:31 AM.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    You could always solve it the stripper way and piss in her purse lol. But seriously, I haven't had that issue. I probably would just keep going into the club and not say anything unless/until the girl remembers you . Hopefully she won't bother you, but if she did I would get out of dodge if it were me. I had a psychopathic stalker before, it was best to pretend I didn't exist with them and change all my info.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    I'd be looking for a different club even if its not quite as good.

    I avoid psycho ppl where ever possible. She won't have changed and is likely just as intense. Drop the mutual friend.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Quote Originally Posted by Raven88 View Post
    Have you ever had to work with someone who seriously wronged you and who you hate? I feel like quitting over this but due to a recent 6 month break from dancing before starting at this club, it's not financially feasible right now.There aren't any other good clubs in the area.
    Yes, however it was @a vanilla job..just be very careful & aware @ all times when ur there is prob. about all you can do..
    & I'm so sorry for your loss. What horrible bitch.


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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    This girl sounds unhinged. She will probably approach you and try to be "nice" but don't fall for it. Just shrug, smile and walk away. Don't engage. Just keep your head down, make your money and then move to a different club eventually. Also don't talk about her to your co workers.

    If she starts to bully you, just leave. Don't engage her at all, it's not worth it. And if it ever goes out of control again, go the cops. Get a restraining order.

    Sorry for your loss and hope it works out for you .

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    I am SO sorry for all this bullshit you have gone through with this psychotic c*nt. I dont even know her, but I know her type all too well, and she is NOT a person you should have to deal with in any way! People like that do NOT change, no matter how old they get or how long ago it was. She will find any excuse to fuck with you, and you do NOT want that kind of drama in your work place. That was really shitty of your co worker to tell her what you said about her (if she did in fact tell her). For now, the best thing to do is work on days/shifts that she does not work. Find out when she works and avoid working with her on those shifts. Save up enough money so that you are in a good place financially and can travel to other areas to dance. Be really discreet when finding out her schedule, dont ask anyone yourself. You could have a guy friend call the club to ask or see if its posted anywhere.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Holy shit. I would keep working until she starts something, or switch clubs once you're not in a tight situation anymore. But don't continue working there, even being around a cray cray can trigger you.


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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    do you have copies of these emails, screenshots of what was said, etc.? SAVE THEM and back them up on 2 flash drives- keep one on you and another somewhere safe, like a safe deposit box. that will come in handy should shit hit the fan. are you still in touch with your friend who witnessed the stalking? contact that person so she knows she may have to come forward about that.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Quote Originally Posted by alice_island View Post
    do you have copies of these emails, screenshots of what was said, etc.? SAVE THEM and back them up on 2 flash drives- keep one on you and another somewhere safe, like a safe deposit box. that will come in handy should shit hit the fan. are you still in touch with your friend who witnessed the stalking? contact that person so she knows she may have to come forward about that.
    Yes!^^ Its best to document everything when dealing with a crazy person. Always have proof should you need it. Try to avoid her as much as possible, but in case anything does happen, have proof of it. Aside from her craziness, she sounds like a pathetic loser with way too much free time on her hands and no life.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Given the severity of the boundary violation....tell the managers you don't want to be scheduled on her days, or just work elsewhere. I have dealt with people like her, and they are very sharp at manipulation. If you confront her at the club she will work it into a "she hates me & I don't know why" situation. Some people like this actually forget all about saying evil and cruel things to others b/c they don't feel the same things other people do (shame, regret, embarrasment.) & Sometimes to due to mental issues or drugs, they actually completely totally don't realize they said and did those things (see- blackout drunks.)

    I also advise you to "make the right friends" discreetly & after some times, be more open about why you don't want to be around her. That way it seems more understandable. (Otherwise, managers dismiss complaints like that as "petty female drama" & do nothing at all.)

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    ^thanks I hadn't thought of that..now that I remember she is a major manipulator. She also used to make fun of me back in the day because I was thinking of getting into dancing. She said strippers are whores and she would never have to work, let alone dance because she supposedly had a trust fund.
    But money has been slow for some girls and she made only $80 last Friday

    Thanks again for the advice.. I did save all this stuff but I've moved out and moved apartments 3 times in the last 8 years so it's long gone now.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    This girl sounds like a major liar too, and a bad one. LOL at her claiming to have a trust fund. I doubt she even had a real LV purse. Anyone can say anything on the internet. To me, she sounds like a psycho loser with no life who bullies and stalks random people on the internet to make herself feel better. Clearly she's way worse than the people she tries to put down! Fuck her.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    I suggest that you continue to work there, but try to avoid her. If she does anything to harass you in the club, you should speak to the managers. If they don't do anything, maybe talk to a lawyer to see if there are any legal actions you could take. There are laws about workplace harassment.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Quote Originally Posted by EastCoastDancer01 View Post
    This girl sounds like a major liar too, and a bad one. LOL at her claiming to have a trust fund. I doubt she even had a real LV purse. Anyone can say anything on the internet. To me, she sounds like a psycho loser with no life who bullies and stalks random people on the internet to make herself feel better. Clearly she's way worse than the people she tries to put down! Fuck her.
    Yeah I've met a couple dancers who claimed they had "trust funds" & rich daddies...Half of the time it was a total fabrication. (There are poor little rich girls in the adult biz, but they usually won't tell for fear of getting kidnapped or extorted.)

    Also....would you be able to pretend that you were not bothered by most of the stalking? if you sent texts and IMs back to her, she might know better. But if you can "fake ignorance" long enough to make some cash & then skip out to another club, that might work the best. I still think just asking to not be scheduled on her shift days is the best option right now.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Thanks all! this club sucks lately and it's been so slow I left in the hole earlier this week..and the manager was rude to me despite the fact that other girls were leaving crying and causing a scene

    Unfortunately this club is drop in and we don't have schedules or else I would just not work with her..on the plus side she's 26 and rather new and I'm a veteran dancer. I haven't been doing great, but I've been doing better than her.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    My issue is a little diffrent. There is a waitress I work with and everyday she sees me she talks down to me, and is always saying things about how i look, how im ugly, tells me i smell bad, she had made rumors about me and gets me in trouble with the mangers. All I do, is smile at her the whole time she ever says anything to me, i just keep smiling im always nice to her and i have never given her a problem. It drives me crazy that she is like this towards me for no reason., ( i seriously dont have clue why she hates me so much ) I just know that its killing her when im always so nice after everything she says and does to me. The way i see it, is that karma will get her.

    I've noticed when not so good things happen to her, i've watched custys yell at her over taking to long to bring the drinks out, and things like that. Those little things that happen to her and make her shift suck is what makes me so okay with everything.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Tearie,

    Have you said anything to the managers about the way she treats you?

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Quote Originally Posted by TearieLeigh View Post
    My issue is a little diffrent. There is a waitress I work with and everyday she sees me she talks down to me, and is always saying things about how i look, how im ugly, tells me i smell bad, she had made rumors about me and gets me in trouble with the mangers. All I do, is smile at her the whole time she ever says anything to me, i just keep smiling im always nice to her and i have never given her a problem. It drives me crazy that she is like this towards me for no reason., ( i seriously dont have clue why she hates me so much ) I just know that its killing her when im always so nice after everything she says and does to me. The way i see it, is that karma will get her.

    I've noticed when not so good things happen to her, i've watched custys yell at her over taking to long to bring the drinks out, and things like that. Those little things that happen to her and make her shift suck is what makes me so okay with everything.
    I had a fat old waitress treat me this way at a sports bar where we worked together. I mostly ignored it but when I got in her face she acted like I pissed on her face. IMO Don't say anything to her when bystanders are nearby, but definitely confront her when she's alone.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    You know the more I think about this topic, I realize that if anyone ever treated me this way I wouldnt take it lightly; I would stalk THEM right back! And I would do it even worse; I would get a bunch of my biggest guy friends and all show up at her house and scare the shit out of her. Or I would save all her emails and texts and send them to her parents so they are aware of what a f*cking nutcase their daughter is lol. I'm a nice girl, but I think its totally reasonable to play dirty if someone gives you a reason to. Stalking is all about fear, so if you dont fear the person, they have no power. This girl doesnt seem to have any power anyway, she clearly has no friends and no life and is mentally unstable. And she sucks at being a stripper, something you have over her. At this point I wouldnt worry if I were you.

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Well it won't be an issue as I no longer work there!

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    Default Re: Working with someone who severaly bullied/stalked me in the past

    Sweet! Did you end things on good terms? Did you find another club?

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