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Thread: Question for girls who do extras

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    Veteran Member lady_lazarus's Avatar
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    Question Question for girls who do extras

    This is a serious question for girls who do extras (for my purposes define as oral/vaginal/anal sex) in the club OR if you can answer this question based on seeing it around you...how are condoms obtained/hidden/stored? Do you/girls you work with bring them in and carry them on you or in your locker or do you expect the customer to have one? Have you worked in a club where house mom/bouncer/manager/etc sold them or gave them away? Please provide detail if you can (i.e., how much were they sold for, how were they stored, how many bought/kept on you at a time,etc). Feel free to PM me this info as well.

    Full disclosure: I've been dancing for almost 5 years now so I'm not an outsider looking to glean info. I'm working on a thesis proposal around a bill in NY that would ban the use of condoms as evidence of prostitution. I have my own observations to consider but I'm interested in hearing as many experiences as possible. I will not be using anyone's answers in my actual paper. This is just to help me get a sense of some of the issues around condom storage/usage that I may have not already thought of myself. I'm not at all interested in hearing about anyones ethical issues with extras in the club (well aware of the arguments). Thank you in advance ladies!

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    Veteran Member zoezoebelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    I've never had sex in the club, but it seems like nearly every other girl there has at some point so I've seen a lot of shit. xD Not to mention some of my customers tell me about it or even show a little. Twice now I've seen a customer pull his dick out during a dance with a condom already on it, which he apparently put on in the bathroom before the dance. A few other customers pulled them out of their pocket before I hastily told them to put it back. But as a general rule for sex in general (whether in or out of the club) never trust a man to have a condom on him. I suspect most girls who regularly do extras here bring their own condoms in their bags, but I know a few who stupidly ride bareback as well. I highly doubt our house mom would give/sell someone a condom. I doubt any house mom would do that since it's just begging for trouble, but who knows.

    For the sake of your thesis, I'd say condoms are a very poor indicator of whether extras have been performed. Lots of guys wear them during normal lap dances to avoid making a mess in their pants and reduce uncomfortable friction. And of course there are a lot of stupid young girls who have sex without a condom, so that just... is not a great way to measure it.

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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    Quote Originally Posted by zoezoebelle View Post
    For the sake of your thesis, I'd say condoms are a very poor indicator of whether extras have been performed. Lots of guys wear them during normal lap dances to avoid making a mess in their pants and reduce uncomfortable friction. And of course there are a lot of stupid young girls who have sex without a condom, so that just... is not a great way to measure it.
    This this this. I'm not sure what side you're taking towards the bill in your thesis, but condoms should absolutely NOT be allowed as evidence for prostitution. Besides the fact that plenty of non-prostitute women use and carry around condoms, it will only serve to make the industry more dangerous with customers pushing against condoms (since they could be used as proof) and more escorts foregoing them for similar reasons.

    Tits and Sass has a lot of great stuff (both links to articles and industry-written pieces) on the condoms as evidence debate. If you haven't already read through it all, I really recommend you do: http://titsandsass.com/tag/condoms-as-evidence/

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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    double post! sorry!

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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    i'd like to chime in. it's not really an extras/condoms thing, BUT it is a cultural thing i have noticed. this has to do with regions and time period.

    i'm not trying to start a regional war, but i have noticed people in the northeast where i am from are more apt to use condoms in general. where i am from has a high needle using population. many outreach programs were created as a result. this meant more risks regarding hiv and especially hep c, which, while uncommon to contract sexually, i think it's scared people straight, especially in my hood. condoms are just used more, period. std education and testing is more accessible there- info was really drilled into us. i never had issues with partners using condoms here, i have had boys think i'm a loony toon for insisting on it here in the south. i refused to have sex with those people.

    i now live in the south, and i notice in general, people seem more 'oh, that isn't as fun' regarding condom usage. people are very 'laid back'. i've noticed more risk taking sexual behaviors. i've also seen statistics pointing to higher stds rates. there's many factors regarding this. i don't feel it's as drilled in people's heads here as it was for us in the northeast. also, access to std testing and education is not NEARLY as good as back home. it's expensive and people are not going nearly as much as they should. also, i know some folks who sadly had abstinence only education and truly are feeling the effects because they have never gotten tested and have no idea where to go and what tests to request. many are NOT getting proper treatment for stds either.

    time is also another factor. it seems we were more scared of stds, esp hiv, back in the day (late 80s-90s). hiv was more of a death sentence than it is now due to advancements in treatment and since we have gained more knowledge on exactly how it's transmitted. (remember at one point in time, people were afraid to hug people with hiv or share drinks with them) stds aren't as stigmatized as they once were. it seems the generation about 10-15 years younger than me is taking more risks than my generation did. it seems from talking to them, they didn't have the fear mongering sex ed my peers and i did. or maybe the education has been cut period.

    ok, i know i'm rambling a bit, but i am going to explain how this ties in to sex work. i've read escort forums out of curiosity and i've seen that due to the recession, de-stigmatization of stds, region, competition- especially with access to forums to compare notes to get the most bang for your buck, that customers are demanding 'no condom' a LOT more than they did compared to sex workers i spoke with 15-20 years ago. bbbj is more norm now than it used to be from what i've gathered. this is a problem. i'm not trying to put down any ladies here who offer it, but please be aware there are health risks.

    condom carrying should NOT be a factor in prostitution. if we stigmatize it in that way, MANY women who are NOT sex workers will not carry them either out of fear. this puts the general population at risk, imo. even though i'm not a 'hook up' type of girl, i always carried a few in my purse when i went out. i used condoms for both birth control AND std prevention. i have done some volunteer work with planned parenthood, and we went bar hopping and gave out free condoms. public health education and safety should NOT be made illegal. i know there would be some stupid politician who would try to pull shit so we couldn't give them out anymore. honestly, it reminds me of how lawmakers make things such as birth control and abortion more difficult to access to punish ALL women and try to keep them from having sex. this can have very dire consequences. mississippi is a good example. look at their teen pregnancy and std rates.

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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    Thanks for your input! just to be clear, I totally support the ban on using condoms as evidence. In fact, i am in support of decriminalizing sex work altogether.

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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    Well at my old club (which was 80% brothel) I've heard a few girls mention that their customers brought their own condoms. I even heard of one of the bouncers giving a customer a condom (gag!) At that club we were not allowed to carry little purses because many of the girls would hide drugs in them. We had to have our money strapped to a garter so it would hard to carry around a condom or anything on the floor. I agree that condoms aren't solid evidence of prostitution unless they can prove it was found in the champagne room or something? When I was dating my husband I would sometimes have them in my dancer purse because I was going to see him right after work.

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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    I worked at a heavy extras club in Dearborn called BTs. I hustled the girls by selling them condoms $3 for one or 2 for $5. The house mom and vip bouncers would both sell for $10 per condom, so I sold a crazy amount. The girls would either get it from the bouncer in vip or bring their own in their bags. They also hid them and/or drugs in their furry legwarmers at times. If they didn't clean up vip after using it or spit cum on the floor, they were charged $50.

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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    I wondered this same thing too. I would hope a person doing oral/vaginal/anal uses a condom cause spreading disease only takes that one time and going to multiple other partners creates a huge health risk. Not to mention this would definitely increase law enforcement attention.

    Doing that in the club is too risky. At least with escorts and brothels a dick check and condom check can be done. I would never rely on a man who I didn't know and was already wearing a condom. For all I know that condom could have been from 1980 sitting in a hot glovebox with holes poked in it.

    I don't see how anyone could carry condom in dancer purse and use it on customer without drawing attention. One would have to dispose of the used wrapper and the used condom without drawing attention. What if they try to flush it and it clogs the toilet pipes? This just seems like too much to be thinking about in the club.

    I've never seen condoms or evidence of sucking and fucking at the club but I only work part time and keep to myself. I only had one dude recently said he wanted some dances and then said he wanted to wear a condom so he wouldn't come all over his pants. I'm not sure if he meant he wanted a friction type dance or he wanted full service but either way I declined. I never dance for dudes who have the goal of jizzing.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    I've never worked in a club where it was widespread (though apparently a few clubs it was going on) and never engaged, but did have a male friend that used to go to one. At this club, condoms were provided (maybe sold) and required. This club got busted many years ago and I haven't seen this friend in almost 20 years. I would think if a club wasn't officially a brothel the club wouldn't provide because they could get busted.

    Honestly I think condoms should be used note than they often are. I think people who have unprotected sex who aren't in a serious relationship are taking a risk. Unless you are monogamous, are both disease free and open to children (or know they won't be conceived) you should use condoms.

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    Veteran Member lady_lazarus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    thanks for this! Did you store the condoms in your locker? Do you know where the house mom and bouncers kept them? Would you say that most girls would spend $3 to buy a condom vs going without? thanks so much for the info!

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    Featured Member Starling's Avatar
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    Default Re: Question for girls who do extras

    Don't personally do extras, but have seen condoms in some of the girls' lockers.

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