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Thread: Did she steal from me?

  1. #1
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    Default Did she steal from me?

    Ill start by saying that this girl, while fun to hang out with at times, is a generally ungrateful person. I let her stay in my home for free when she needed a place and she trashed the place and didn't contribute a thing. This is just so you get an idea of who she is.

    She's not really someone I consider a friend anymore after the house guest thing, but we work at the same club and it's a 40 minute drive, so we often carpool.

    Lately she had been saying how great she looks in the color red. Well, I had a brand new red lingerie set from Victoria's Secret and it was in my dancer bag. I'm 100% sure it was all in the bag, as I handwashed it prior to leaving and grabbed the whole thing off the drying rack. (Even if I forgot something, it's bright red and I'd easily find it later).

    In the car she says she forgot her eyeliner. I tell her some is in my bag and she can use it. I'm the one driving so I'm not paying too much attention to what she's doing.
    When I get to work, I notice the bra is gone. It did not fall out in my car - I searched the entire thing several times. It was at the very bottom of the bag under my shoes and jacket so it didn't fall out on the way to my car. Despite being positive I had it in the bag, I searched my apartment thoroughly with no luck. We do wear the same bra size and I can't help but feel she may have taken it.

    This girl would have to have some serious nerve to take it because that means she literally stole it right in front of me when I was looking away briefly due to driving. I knew she was kind of a freeloader, but I thought it was more of her being raised poorly than being malicious.

    I have no evidence she actually took it other than the fact she used the eyeliner in the bag with the bra and now the bra is gone. I would feel awful to falsely accuse her but there's no other logical explanation.

    I already asked her in a non-accusing way if she knows where it went. She acted confused and said she saw it when grabbing the eyeliner and "has no idea."

    It was an expensive bra and I'm pissed...not just because of that, but because she is the most ungrateful human I've ever wasted time with if she stole from me after letting her live on my couch. I could easily take back the money from her it would take to buy a new one...She leaves her money bag out a lot from work. However this is a last resort and only something I'd only consider if I found out for a fact she took it. I would feel awful doing that to someone innocent. I'd give it a lot more time to turn up first.

    I don't know what to do since I'm sure she'll deny it if I confront her again. Obviously I'll be distancing myself from her to the point of no longer even carpooling. But I at least want a shot at getting the bra back and finding out if it was her

  2. #2
    Moderator Aurora_Sunset's Avatar
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    Default Re: Did she steal from me?

    As much as it might make sense that the "only logical explanation" is that she took it, I would refrain from fully believing that, and especially from taking money from her, unless some actual proof pops up. I've been convinced before that someone stole something from me - I knew they wanted this thing and suddenly I couldn't find it, and I just knew that I had put it in the place it was now missing from, and how could it possibly be anything other than that they took it? But they didn't... I just misplaced it.

    Are you sure it didn't fall out of the car between it and the club? She may have bumped it to the top of the bag during her search, and then it did fall out outside. Maybe you didn't even really pack it and it's fallen someplace weird in your apartment. People say they "oh yeah, I totally saw that thing" when asked about if they saw something later, even if they didn't, which could be the case with her answer. Weird brain thing; triggering false memories. You never know if it was actually in the bag or not.

    Maybe she did steal it - you never know. You certainly don't paint the best picture of her. But I feel like it would be really dumb to 1) do it right in front of you. Where would she even have stuffed it to not make it obvious she was stealing a bra right under your nose? And 2) it's not like she could proceed to wear it right in front of you at work, so why even take it then? There are multiple, random, weird-ass ways things can get lost. And you kinda hate this girl anyway, so it seems like it's just easier to think that the only possibility is that she took it. If you really want to find out, I guess you could ask her if you could borrow an outfit and ask to look through her stuff, or invite yourself over and sneak through her underwear drawer. Or wait for her to be dumb and wear it in front of you. Otherwise, it might just be best to relax and hope it shows up. And distance yourself from her anyway since you obviously don't like her.
    Last edited by Aurora_Sunset; 10-29-2015 at 08:12 AM.
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    Default Re: Did she steal from me?

    I had a friend from work who I'm 90% sure stole my wallet from me but I never accused her of it since I didn't ever see her actually take it. I had my work ID, debit card, credit cards, gift cards, and cash from one nights shift in there (luckily it wasn't a great night lol). It really sucked but I just knew not to be friends with her after and distanced myself from her. I don't talk to her anymore unless she talks to me first and I definitely don't hangout with her. I took it as learning who not to trust the hard way.

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    Default Re: Did she steal from me?

    I should add she does work at another club I never go to so she would probably wear the bra there. You guys are right though, no accusations without proof

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    Default Re: Did she steal from me?

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    Last edited by mm621; 12-18-2015 at 01:59 PM.

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