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Thread: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

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    Default quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    I have been dancing for the past year and my boyfriend who i am very serious with said that he can not stand me dancing any more. I honestly hate the idea of quitting but i knew when i started this was a short term job and that in order for my relationship to progress this needs to happen.

    I was wandering what vanilla jobs ex dancers have gone to?

    And how to deal with a lower income, not making your own schedule and life style changes?!

    PLEASE DO NOT RESPOND WITH COMMENTS ABOUT HIM MAKING ME STOP OR CHANGING FOR A MAN. I HAVE MADE MY CHOICE AND ONLY LOOKING FOR ADVICE IN THE PATH I HAVE CHOSEN!

    THANK YOU IN ADVANCE FOR ANY ADVICE

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    God/dess Selina M's Avatar
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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    I don't have any advice except to say best of luck... it's really hard to adjust. Going to making ¼ of the pay in 3x as many hours, with a schedule and a boss, is really difficult.
    There's no way to deal with the lower income except to downsize. If you can find a cheaper apartment, do it. If you drive a nicer car, sell it and buy a $10k used economy car. Etc.
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    Featured Member Aurora14's Avatar
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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    I'm the only one at my club that has left vanilla work to dance full time, I used to be a pharmacy tech, something I can always go back to (but probably never will). The girls I've worked with usually go into Cosmetology, Nursing, or bartending/ waitressing. Most of them will keep a couple of outfits and a pair of shoes just in case. A few of them dance an occasional Saturday, like near holidays or kid's birthdays. It was a rough transition for most of them. The ones that weren't married did a lot of downsizing. Smaller homes/apartments or just downgraded phones, internet, cable, and entertainment spending. Sold cars. Had to make sure they set their alarms extra early at first. Some come back because they can't handle being micro-managed.

    You will need to make a lot of adjustments, but it is something that can be done if you are determined to make it successful.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    I don't think you should up and quit especially if you absolutely need the money. Maybe cut back your hours while looking for another income source but don't quit until you have secured another income source first.

    Why can't he help you brainstorm how to come up with the extra money / give you the money you need? Not only does he know you and your skills better than a bunch of strangers on the internet but if he expects you to drop your job and your livelihood then he should be more helpful like giving you money to supplement your lost income or help you network with some professionals in your desired career.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    I don't think you should up and quit especially if you absolutely need the money. Maybe cut back your hours while looking for another income source but don't quit until you have secured another income source first.
    This.

    Unless you have a degree in something that you're transitioning to (which it doesn't sound like), it will be near impossible to make the same income at a vanilla job - which isn't the end of the world, but the transition will be harder than you think. The last time I just straight-up quit dancing, I went into over $5,000 worth of debt. Not that it's not do-able, but it will be much easier on you if you can keep dancing 1 shift a week or so while you scale back your lifestyle and get used to the shift. And if your bf gives you shit about it, remind him that most people can't make an instantaneous shift from large income to way-lesser income. Know those stories about CEOs getting laid off and suddenly they're bankrupt even though they conceivably should have had enough money to just live the way normal people live? Same basic principle. It's a real thing and a real concern.

    As far as good vanilla jobs to move into - bartending? Same sorts of hours and cash. If you end up getting a fairly low-wage job, like retail or serving, do you do anything crafty so you could side-business on etsy or something? It will give you extra wiggle room with the money and keep you in charge of some of your work. Also, check monster.com and similar sites for entry level sales jobs. They'll pretty much take anyone and can pay well. IMO, they kill your soul after a while, but it's something to start with.
    Last edited by Aurora_Sunset; 11-29-2015 at 08:09 PM.
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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    Ya, proper transitioning is so important. Nursing, cosmetology, take schooling and time. Most places want their waitresses or bartenders to have experience or training. Otherwise you will be stuck at McDonalds or in retail earning minimum wage. Do you have any previous schooling or work experience to rely on? You and your BF may have to comprimise. He may have to accept that in order for you to permanently stay out of dancing you have continue for a bit to do more preparation. Otherwise you will end up in a situation that you just wind up back in the club after 6 months or a year.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    You could try to get another sales job...cars, phones, insurance, etc. Or get your realtor's license and sell houses. I know some other dancers who've done that (or still do and dance on the side). I am not the salesman type at all but I hear the $ can be decent. You could start a business selling on etsy, ebay or amazon (or all) which is what I'm doing now, but it's very time consuming, takes some start up cash, and unless you go big and have people helping you don't expect to make nearly the same $ as dancing.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    Like the other poster said, sales. Consider going into something where you can continue to gain benefit from your looks, sexuality and your knowledge of men and male psychology. E.g., selling very expensive cars to men. Being gorgeous may help you seal the deal and the commissions may be good. xx

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    Senior Member mm621's Avatar
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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    I know exactly where you're coming from! My time dancing is up pretty soon, due to relationship stuff (and the fact that I'm about ready to quit anyway lol)...

    Keep in mind that you do not need to stress yourself out by going into a low paying/minimum wage retail job. Do you have a degree that you can use? If it were me, I would say go into sales (insurance sales also allows you to work your own schedule, but you will need to work hard to be successful), because like dancing, your income potential is uncapped. Maybe you an can try an entry level job that allows advancement to a higher paying position with experience. An entry level job will not pay as much as dancing right off the bat, but you should be making more money over time with raises and advancement. There are many level office jobs do not require a 4-year degree, but they will pay a livable salary.

    It will be an adjustment (both financially and freedom wise), but you will adapt. This will be easier if you don't live an extravagant lifestyle. If you do, you will need to downsize (as many others have said) and give up luxuries such as a nice car, expensive rent, shopping/going out whenever you please, etc. Perhaps you can start downsizing now, so that you're already used to living off of $x amount every month before the big transition to the vanilla world. Another perk to downsizing now is that you can develop a decent amount of savings from the extra money that you would have spent on luxury purchases.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    Sales- insurance, pharmaceuticals.
    Nannying/Babysitting- Set your own rate and hours. For the most part, you're left alone.
    Camming? Or is that not part of the deal?
    Waitressing at a SC. Or is that not allowed?
    Bartending ^ see above. Or at a high end hotel/lounge.
    Cleaning houses.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    Totally random but, energy healer at a spa? I have an excellent lady that I go to. She's in a good town $$$$, and always booked. I tip her well, and I'm sure others too.
    Last edited by Vyanka; 11-30-2015 at 12:29 AM.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    You like music? Look into these... https://www.careersinmusic.com/music-careers/

    Like animals, hate ppl? Doggy grooming. Vet assistant. Dog walker. Etc...

    Massage therapist? Also, massage girl at the club?
    Last edited by Vyanka; 11-30-2015 at 12:31 AM.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    I set a definite time line for my dancing. My plan was to quit when I graduated from college. I did. My last few months dancing, I contacted all my regulars. I tried to schedule time to be with them do a long VIP or whatever was their thing. A couple of guys took me on shopping trips. One wanted me to watch me pee. So, we went out behind the club and I peed for him to watch. He gave me $500 for that little bit of total weirdness. I drew the line at outright prostitution. But, looking back, I wish I'd gone to bed with one of the guys who took me shopping. I really liked him. When April came around, I scheduled one last big trip to Louisville to dance for some regulars down there. I sold panties and even some costumes. When I was done, about a week before finals. I sent one last blast out to all the guys contact info I had saying I was retired and how much I loved them all. Then, I shut down the pre-paid cell account I gave to custys. I stopped checking my stripper email and I never went back to my old clubs. I put as much money as I could in my investment account from that last semester of dancing and that was the end. I knew I had finals and the CPA exam to study for and take. After the CPA was done, I move to NC to take a job I had lined up here.

    The plan was to never look back - then my current BF and I met. It turns out, he likes strip clubs. So, at first I gave him a bunch of super VIP dances at home. But, after a while he wanted to go stripping with me. It's strange to be dressed like a custy in a SC. But, I know better than to really dress up.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    Is he ok with camming? Maybe bartending? Financial aid is always out there. Programs that Can be completed in a year or less and available in stand alone schools and community colleges that can be completed in a year or less: nursing(LPN)-intense program, thirty to forty hours a week, phlebotomy, massage therapy, real estate, cosmetology, esthetics
    Two semesters or less: nail tech classes, nursing assistant, pharmacy tech, ethical massage practitioner.
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    Quote Originally Posted by xStacey View Post
    Close contact, for an hour, for $40? And I guess I'll have to make conversation with them too?

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    Try a temp agency. Search for an adecco in your area. My husband uses them and they set him up with work the same week. He has a lot of experience but apparently they can find you something even if you don't. It might not be the greatest job but its something, and a lot of the jobs will hire you on full time if you do well.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    Quote Originally Posted by Charlotte.V. View Post
    And how to deal with a lower income, not making your own schedule and life style changes?!
    Dance on the side once in a while.

    When I first started out in my career I got stuck with a crappy shift on a crappy floor for a crappy company. I danced on the side for financial reasons especially while getting used to a regular job. But now it's gotten to a point where I am making the same amount weekly and sometimes more than I have dancing, and more doors have been opening.

    It takes time with everything else and eventually you get used it and the salary follows with experience. What I like the most is that I don't have to deal with the club crazies on regular basis anymore (molesty customers, staff that want to sleep with you, awful coworkers). Sometimes I miss feeling like a diva, but hey. I can always go to the club to get my fix.

    I don't know what your education level is, but if you don't have the education I highly recommend investing in that, such as healthcare, STEM, or possibly accounting, or a regular trade. When you're new in these fields you'll get stuck with the crappy shifts and salary being inexperienced and all, but the increase in salary will come with time. Its a long road but ends up being profitable later on. Just my

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    You may consider starting some kind of business. Since we are accustomed to being self directed, it is a pretty tough transition to being under direction all day long. You may have to get some further training or licensing to open your own small business, but if you go into something like massage therapy, personal training, bookkeeping, social media management, or sell a product in an amazon store, chances are you'll be happier and make more money than if you took a paycheck job.

    The problem with starting a small business is that it takes a while before you start earning income. Can you take a few months and work as a stripper as well as work a side business? Or do you need to quit stripping ASAP?

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    Default Re: quitting dancing to find a vanilla job?

    OP - you can always omit information from your posts that you don't want people to respond to. Without the significant-other information, this is a fairly simple "I'm quitting dancing, what should I do next?" thread.


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