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Last edited by Lana588; 12-06-2015 at 05:08 AM.




Run far far away from this guy. Stop looking for any excuse for his behavior other than him being a crap person.
He clearly thrives on drama and control and would do the same thing to the other girl that he did to you.
He doesn't love you. If he did he wouldn't lie to you and treat you this way.
Relationships where partners make strippers quit basically always end up falling apart later for other reasons. It's convenient for them to blame issues on your job, but it's ultimately just the tip of the iceberg. Quit for them and they'll be right on you with their next demand.




Wait, so they are broken up and he went out and got laid. Did she? Is there some unwritten rule going on here?
Would it be better if he banged some disgusting chick? OR a rocket scientist?
We are all a product of where we have been and what we have been through. Maybe the other stripper drive him right back to her.
I am not putting him up for a humanitarian award, and these two need to work on his attitude and language around her dancing, and ther are many fish in the sea,k but I am having trouble seeing what he did wrong here.
I mean, if he was an engineer and she banged another engineer when they broke up, would she be wrong?
Stop worrying about the other dancer. This isn't about her. It's never about her, or what she has or doesn't have compared to you. Attraction isn't based on some laundry list of specific traits that you can scientifically suss out. You'll never figure it out, because 1) there's nothing to definitively figure out, and 2) it's irrelevant at this point.
If you spend your time trying to piece out "what that other girl had while we were apart" you're wasting time that's better spent focusing on the relationship between you and your boyfriend. This is about you and him - not her - and your issues together regarding dancing, your education, your expectations of each other etc etc. Comparing what he wants out of a relationship with you to what he wanted out of a fling with her isn't going to solve your problems and is only going to drive you crazy. Even if you got an answer, what are you going to do with the information? Change yourself? Hold it over his head forever that he gave you an answer about her that you don't like?
Forget the other girl and focus on the dynamic between the two of you instead, because it sounds like there's a LOT to be worked out other than "what did the bitch you were banging while we were broken up have that I didn't?"
Never get caught up on comparing yourself to another woman. You're better than that. Don't let him hold that sort of power where every girl he's been with that's not you is going to make you feel insecure and drive you into a jealousy spiral where you keep trying to pick apart what's "wrong" with you and why he wanted her and not you at that time. No man is worth that level of sanity and self-respect. Put it in the past, and focus on the now.
Don't try to win over the haters. You are not the Jerk Whisperer.
Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
Those are the common thoughts when a break-up occurs, which it has. You're not overreacting, but you are hurting over the loss of your ex hooking up with a stripper, after he expressed how much it affected him while he was with you. (kinda sounds like a shitty guy, no offense with huge lack of communication and respect not given the dancer's actions but his own.) Sometimes it doesn't work out, but I would take that giant red flag and run with it knowing that he wasn't all that supportive of the relationship working out. Sounds like he has no clue what the hell he wants..either way, the other girl shouldn't matter at all no how much it aches. The even bigger issue is he lied to you! Personally from an outside perspective, he seems like a player given he hopped in bed with someone else right after the breakup, it should speak words about what he is really searching for. There are many respectable men out there for you to connect with who will give you a lot more respect, love, common sense and dedication..



Sigh........it's not about the fact that he went out and got laid when they were broken up. It's the fact that he gave her shit about stripping, she quit for him, they break up, and he fucked ANOTHER STRIPPER. Aka he doesn't want 'his girl' to be a whore but he loves whores (not saying that OP is a whore, FYI).




Oh I get that, and as I mentioned they need to figure that out and his inability to deal may be the deal breaker for her, but the question was about him screwing a stripper, and they were both free to do as they chose in that time period, and he did. Was there some payback involved, screwing someone he figured she would find out about, probably. So, deal with that, if they all worked at Walmart same difference.
Hook ups frequently come from those who one is around, and this chick was around.......as opposed to the rocket scientist
Being a dancer's boyfriend is a difficult job, but a job he signed up for, he should either deal with it or bail, and not give her a hard time about it.
His inability of being honest should be a deal breaker for her. They didn't choose to do anything, he decided to fuck another girl right after it ended. I don't really see what can be resolved from the situation without left over bitterness, questions and extreme jealousy in mind. He killed the relationship technically, so he shouldn't even be bothering her after the emotional garbage left behind. He wanted candy, now he has it and it may not be sweet enough for him..hopefully she finds a man who can commit and not lead her around in circles with unnecessary drama involving other people. Being a stripper bf might be a hard job, but its just as hard if not worse for her having to work with the girl he decided to bang. (He couldn't go to another club to get his fix?) Making a dating profile after a break up, is okay..getting in bed with someone else (another stripper) a day after leaving is just a ball slap to the forehead.. Am willing to bet she cried the majority of that time period, not very fair..





Sport fucking and a serious relationship are two entirely different things. The fact that he screwed around with a stripper while he was a free agent has no bearing whatsoever on his feelings about the love of his life working as one. You'll notice that he's not dating the girl that he was sport fucking now, which should say something.
Now I'm not defending the guy as I have no idea about anything that he did or said during their relationship, but I'm not sure getting mad over casual sex had while he was unattached makes a lot of sense.




Maybe this should've been posted in the Ladies Only section lol.
This is back to the same argument that a guy can give the woman he's with shit for being a stripper, yet he gets a hall pass for being a strip club customer and fucking other strippers. That is totally hypocritical. Plus he gave her so much shit about it that she quit for him, then he turns around and does that. That's disrespectful and I don't think some men get that (especially not ones who cheat on their wives with strippers lol). Whether you want to call it "sport fucking" or not it is still disrespectful.
OP the best thing you can do for yourself is to stop thinking about the other girl 100% because that can drive you crazy (I know from experience). Don't compare yourself to her. It's up to you whether you decide to just get over this and move on or not. Just keep in mind that these things can really eat away at a relationship and it'll be hard to get over the jealousy & bitterness. You're definitely not overreacting though. Just don't obsess over this other girl and keep comparing the two of you because it can really hurt your self esteem.





The difference is that he was single when it happened. If we followed your logic, then by your way of thinking, any guy who ever purchased sex when he was single should be ok with his future wife having sex with other guys for money while they are married. IMHO it just doesn't make sense.




Lol well to me that is the same thing. If a guy buys sex from escorts then he shouldn't be upset if he's ever in a relationship with an escort. It's the same thing as being with a stripper.. the whole double standard thing and the guy being a hypocrite. But that's getting off topic so I'll leave it at that.



Yes, 'sport fucking' and a serious relationship are completely different. And again, no one is begrudging him the right to put his dick where he pleases while he's single. But. Let me paint a clearer picture of what I meant since it's being misunderstood here:
Girl is stripper and boy doesn't like it. (Stripping = BAD)
Girl quits stripping for boy. (Self explanatory)
Girl and boy break up. (Again, self explanatory)
Boy turns around and fucks stripper. (SIKE!! Stripping = GREAT but only for ME to enjoy it! Not you!)
Does this make better sense?





If Macy's is closed guys are gonna shop at Wal Mart. Doesn't make you any less hot or desirable. She just happened to be there. Forget about it and move on. You deserve better.
"Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
Tempest





Not really. I don't view having to live with something, including its effects on a loved one and a relationship, day in and day out, to be remotely comparable to dipping a toe in it for brief entertainment. But perhaps there is a "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" element to all of this, so I'll leave it at that and wish the OP good luck as she moves forward.





Um yes, he DID make you quit by guilting you into it with some bullshit about that 'it hurts him'. What a whiny little pansy![]()
And relationships that are off/on for multiple years are usually never going to pan out into anything.
IMO I say dump him, he sounds like a hypocritical piece of shit.
"People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."
"You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."
I like being alone, I just don't like being lonely.
I like a lot of people's responses to this. Not all of them- I definitely disagree with the people who said he did nothing wrong just because he was single. At that, I agree that he was being selfish, he expected enjoying strippers/being a stripper to be ok only for him, not for her. I think, the way people said he did nothing wrong - while that may have some element of truth to it in some situations - the way people are saying that, seems intended to disregard her feelings.
Last edited by WierdGirl; 01-18-2019 at 11:23 PM.
That's exactly the point though! Dude is a flat out hypocrite and sexist. Why is it okay to f*ck strippers but something is wrong with dating them for long term relationships? And he made her feel so bad about being a stripper - to the point she quit her job and significantly reduced her income (thus lowering her economic standing and attractiveness to other men) but the. Turns right around and gets involved with another stripper. Wtf?!?
I think he purposely drover her to break up with him just so he could have sex with the other stripper to play a mind game on the OP to not only create competition for his d*ck, but to also put the OP back in her place by making her feel less secure knowing another woman (ironically another stripper) could take her place.
This guy doesn't not seem like long term relationship material.
Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 12-02-2015 at 12:30 AM.
“Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”





He doesn't want you stripping bc he doesn't want you to find out he's a regular customer/hooks up with strippers. I've been there. Before i started dancing, I was with someone long term who didn't like the idea if I waitressed at a strip club. Fkn waitressing, c'mon. After i dumped the asshole motherfucker, in he strolls into my club with his buddies 2nd night I started working at my first SC. He cried like a pussy ass bitch, begging me to quit and offered to hook me up with a nice job. Muahahahahahaha!!!! He looked so UGLY crying. Was beautiful and glorious for me to see him hurt, the way he hurt me. Karma is awesome![]()
Last edited by Vyanka; 12-02-2015 at 02:23 AM.





But I agree with some here. Don't compare yourself to anyone he's been with. Move on. There's something better out there.Get back into the club, and forget pieces of shits like this.
Last edited by Vyanka; 12-02-2015 at 02:25 AM. Reason: eta
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