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Thread: Does anyone think of writing a book?

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    Default Does anyone think of writing a book?

    Hi everyone.

    I haven't posted on here in many years as I have been retired from dancing for almost five years now and completely out of the industry now for 4 years ( I was a front door girl too). I danced from 2002 until 2011, so that was a real lucrative time and it was an adventure for sure,... it was the best of times, it was the worst of times ..that really sums up my dancing career. Dancing really was a transformational experience for me..I went from being a girl to a woman, had the best of intentions going in but really got sucked into the lifestyle, drinking, freedom/money but then fell into a very deep depression because it just wasn't me anymore and I wanted a more stable "healthy" lifestyle but didn't know how to transition out of it.
    Now a days my life is completely different, I graduated with a B.A. in Psychology, am married to the man of my dreams, and I gave birth to my son last year. I am a stay at home mom right now, which I love, and am about to start a career in healthcare. Dancing really feels like another lifetime, I do miss certain aspects of it but actually I am a much happier person now. Yet dancing was a creative outlet for me and I miss the expression. One way I can express that is by taking pole dancing classes which really gives me fond memories but recently I have been thinking of writing my story.(When I was little my dream career was to be a published author). Writing about my dancing days might be cathartic and also dancing was a major chapter of my life that taught me many life lessons and something I will never regret. Yes I wish I would have done some things differently but I try not spend too much energy focusing on what I wished I could have changed, if anything, everything led up to where I am today which I am so happy with, especially my son. I guess I'm just saying I think it would be fulfilling to share my story, remember my past, and create something creative and positive with what I went through. Does anyone else ever considered writing their story?

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    Veteran Member missykrissy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    You can put your book on Amazon Kindle and they split the money with you 70/30 your favor. Kara whats her name did it, the woman who wrote "power of the pussy"
    Just be aware, there are a fuckton of stripper memoire type books already.

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    Quote Originally Posted by lilac666 View Post
    Hi everyone.

    I haven't posted on here in many years as I have been retired from dancing for almost five years now and completely out of the industry now for 4 years ( I was a front door girl too). I danced from 2002 until 2011, so that was a real lucrative time and it was an adventure for sure,... it was the best of times, it was the worst of times ..that really sums up my dancing career. Dancing really was a transformational experience for me..I went from being a girl to a woman, had the best of intentions going in but really got sucked into the lifestyle, drinking, freedom/money but then fell into a very deep depression because it just wasn't me anymore and I wanted a more stable "healthy" lifestyle but didn't know how to transition out of it.
    Now a days my life is completely different, I graduated with a B.A. in Psychology, am married to the man of my dreams, and I gave birth to my son last year. I am a stay at home mom right now, which I love, and am about to start a career in healthcare. Dancing really feels like another lifetime, I do miss certain aspects of it but actually I am a much happier person now. Yet dancing was a creative outlet for me and I miss the expression. One way I can express that is by taking pole dancing classes which really gives me fond memories but recently I have been thinking of writing my story.(When I was little my dream career was to be a published author). Writing about my dancing days might be cathartic and also dancing was a major chapter of my life that taught me many life lessons and something I will never regret. Yes I wish I would have done some things differently but I try not spend too much energy focusing on what I wished I could have changed, if anything, everything led up to where I am today which I am so happy with, especially my son. I guess I'm just saying I think it would be fulfilling to share my story, remember my past, and create something creative and positive with what I went through. Does anyone else ever considered writing their story?

    Wow our lives are very parallel! , but I danced from 2001-2009. Married and pregnant with a baby boy . I have often said the same, that dancing seems like a lifetime ago, hence my user name; Ninelives. As far as writing a book, I have considered it, it's hard because I worry it will be very stereo typical because I danced in Vegas. All of the things that are typical "stripper drama" happened ; innocent girl fall from grace, bad home life, timid at the club then a top earner, getting into the fast life, losing top earner status, falling into depression, meeting the wrong guy. Friends dying of overdoses, others becoming life long alcoholics. There would have to be a ton of character development and depth put into the book to make people see past the stereo typical events.
    I have read many stripper memoirs, one of the best was Diablo Cody's book Candy Girl and Strip City by Lily Burana. Both of these girls do it well and bring something more than just the typical Stripper drama to the table. Check those out as they may help you.

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    Wow! Yeah our lives are so similar. Your story is probably way more "juicy" being in Vegas though. I understand about your reservations about not wanting to perpetuate negative stereotypes of the industry...but I guess my motivation to write my story is more internal than external...I just am more interested in "owning" my story and not trying to defend the industry or create some sort of racy tell all. Congrats on your pregnancy btw!

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    I've written 3 fiction novels (they are terrible, they'll never see the light of day) and one short fiction story I published on Kindle. I've attempted to write my memoirs several times, and I keep abandoning the project. One would think that writing your memoirs should be so much easier than writing fiction, but I've found that memoirs are very emotionally loaded.

    Having said that, if you feel you can go ahead and write your memoirs and can deal with the trauma that will come up while you are writing, the best way to approach is to find your story arc. Most writers spend months writing the back story before they ever write the beginning of their story.

    You have to start in the "middle" of your story arc. The middle is where you step from one reality to another. For instance, what was the deciding factor that pushed you to become a stripper? (Hint: for most of us this is a long story, but there is a tipping point that lead to you actually walk into a club and audition. What was that tipping point that pushed you into the club? That is where you should begin your story).

    Once you've figured out where to begin your tale, the next step is figuring out where you met your biggest challenges. A story that is framed as:

    I became a stripper, met a lot of wonderful people, made a ton of money and invested wisely. I had some funny things happen, I shopped at fancy stores for the first time. I traveled to exotic places and experienced a level of freedom that no other job would let me experience. Then I met my wonderful and flawless husband, got married and lived happily ever after.
    BORING

    This is where memoirs get hard: You need to write about your serious fuck ups. We gain experience through decisions we make, and no one makes perfect decisions every single time. Did you develop a drinking or drug habit? Did you end up doing things that harmed you in some way? Did you hurt people who you were close to? What lead to those situations? What kind of social back lash did you experience due to the decision of becoming a stripper? Did you have a melt down or massive burnout at any point and how did you deal with it?

    Getting into the really hard stuff is what people want to read in a memoir. Readers want to know how you resolved your problems, or if you didn't resolve them and why?

    Lastly, don't worry about sticking to your chronology. Real human beings are all over the place as far as progress towards goals. We make false starts then fall back to something else, then we start again. Outline your challenging stories first. Then decide what the best order to present these challenges makes the most sense for your story. Maybe early on something terrible happened to you at the club and you repressed your feelings about it for a while. But later, when those repressed feeling emerged it lead to the next challenge to overcome. Write about those two topics together, don't put the separation of the actual calendar into the memoir.

    Write as if you are writing a video game. Complete one level before moving on to the next level. I know real life doesn't work like that, but readers need that kind of story telling to make sense of your tales. If you are writing in a completely factual way and adhering to chronology as the events happened, you are writing an autobiography, not a memoir.

    Nobody reads autobiographies of regular people. Unless you are running for President or something, an autobiography is just a glorified diary.

    Good luck and please keep us posted about your progress. There are a few of us writerly types here on the forum. We're rooting for you!

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    Are you wanting to write for yourself to just " get it out" more like journaling for your own personal reflection and growth or do you actually want to write a book and make money off of it and have millions of strangers read it, more commercial? from what you've written it sounds more like the former? And I think it would be very helpful, I love journaling it's saved my sanity quite a few times!

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    YEAH!I would,but not about me stripping per see.Mine would be more like a romance book involving a innocent stripper,and bad boy cop thats really into BDSM and punishing naughty misbehaving strippers.

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy Love View Post
    YEAH!I would,but not about me stripping per see.Mine would be more like a romance book involving a innocent stripper,and bad boy cop thats really into BDSM and punishing naughty misbehaving strippers.
    I'd buy that book!

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    Yes, I have @ least 2 books I'd like to write, I did attend a self-publishing 1 day workshop @ my library..I took notes, seems kind of involved & expensive.
    I also thought of maybe submitting an article(s) to a magazine, then later expanding on it?


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    -Eartha Kitt

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    Thanks Tourdefranzia. Your suggestions on the logistics of writing a memoir are very insightful and great advice! It seems overwhelming and daunting to think of all that happened in that decade but by having some structure it is much less intimidating. And yes, it wouldn't be all sunshine and rainbows even though it ends with a happy ending, I had to make some hard decisions and let go which was not easy at all...so the memoir would defiantly focus on my transformation, growth, my struggles and triumphs because all of that is the truth... Simone87, I'd say my main motivation in writing the book is to get a better perspective on my life, what I've learned and what I've taken away from it all in my life going forward....but if someone could relate to me or identify with me through my writings then that would make me feel very emotionally touched actually by publishing it then that would be amazing too...I would just try to get published under a different name as I don't want my past to interfere with the professional career in healthcare I am pursuing.

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    Sounds like you've had plenty of experience, so I'm sure you also have plenty of stories to pick out. Like the others have said, there are a lot of stripper memoirs out there. It's practically it's own genre. So long as you bring something new to the table and write it well, I don't see why it shouldn't work. I have a friend who is also a member on here who has is thinking of writing a book later on, but just has a blog for the moment. While she hasn't been stripping for nearly as long, she brings something new since she grew up a devout Muslim and still wears a headscarf during the day. Her main worry is what would happen if her family found out and ostracized her because of it.

    If you do get around to writing and publishing your story (or just releasing it for that matter), please send us a link so we can read! Good luck

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    LOL nice

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    Default Re: Does anyone think of writing a book?

    In a general sense like many have already said...there are already so many dancer biographies(I have read several). I think keeping a reader's attention is prolly more difficult than usual bc everything has been displayed or told. People get bored after seeing the same thing over and over. Whether it is in writing or in person ( i.e. the stripclub--same dancers---same outfits etc)...If u could find a way to give urself an edge or make ur story more alluring than most that are already out there then I would go for it. Otherwise maybe it is best to keep the thoughts and experiences in a personal journal.

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