I don't know how to really start this and didn't know where to put this but Life support seemed like a good place.. First of all let me start with a bit of background. I'm near 40, have had a few long term relationships (None more than 9 1/2 years) in which I was supported financially but never had to really earn my own living. I suffer from Bi Polar depression, terrible anxiety and it has made a serious impact not only on my personal life, but my financial earnings throughout life and I know when the time comes and I can no longer work I will have no social security income, or other retirement to live off of. I have no family, I have no friends to offer support morally or financially so it's all up to me to make things better. I'm not an educated woman with many options available for work especially in the area I live in and I always come back to camming. Now with new medication I can finally see the light of the end of the tunnel and I am getting the drive to work for the first time in my life and I guess what I'm looking for is a little reassurance that it's not too late for me to turn things around. I must also admit I'm afraid.
I do wish I would of got to this point earlier in life, but comfort myself that I'm getting it now and things could be a lot worse. I do believe camming will be around for many years and evolve and I'd like to evolve with it. Any suggestions how I can get over my fears and just go for a better life? Up to now I felt like a loser. I just keep repeating all the negativity I've heard in my life in my mind. I can't focus on my good qualities. I'm paralyzed by fear and indecision. Can someone be afraid of success and good things happening to/for them? Any help/point of view would be appreciated.



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