
Originally Posted by
PyrrhicFallout
Text you for any reason other than setting up an appointment, unless they are long-time regular that I don't mind communicating with.
Confide that they love you and would like to begin a relationship.
Mistake my very effective acting skills for actual, genuine pleasure and interest in him.
Ask for discount because they are young or attractive.
Try to remove condom mid-intercourse on the sly.
Say I have the same name as their daughter, then, grin and hand me a wad of cash as they undress.
Ask my real name and not accept when I lie to you (even though I give a normal fake "real" name).
When they think they are a magical unicorn for wanting to go down on me like no one else has ever offered (I don't allow it with clients, and I think guys who pressure me to do it are so icky). Some workers are different, but I'm not in the industry to be pleasured. I perform my job and that's that. Occasionally, I will connect really well sexually with a client and genuinely enjoy the sex. But, I'm sick of 50 year old men who are so confident that I want them going down on me for "my pleasure."
When they talk about their daughter's, who are the same age as me, post-coitus. Just casually mentioning how she is doing on the debate team. Like why the fuck would you find that a normal conversation topic?
Being a virgin, lying about it, and denying even after I gently asked questions like, "it's ok if you don't have a lot of experience, do you want me to show you what feels good?" This is after them fucking me like a rabbit or something they saw in a porn. After appointment, he fell in love with me and texted me tons until I blocked his number. Sent me a fucking hand-written letter in the mail after that, which would have been embarrassing (for him) and hilarious if it wasn't for his insistence on our destiny together and some wedding ideas he had in the works, so it just became profoundly creepy and sad.
Creepily finding my real name by finding a photo of me on my Universities website and then adding me on Linked In.
Being fussy about the shower that I require him to take at the beginning of the appointment.. "I just showered before I came here" (reeks of B.O. offensively masked with cheap cologne). Just get in the shower for a few minutes so I can hide the money you just gave me and you don't smell disgusting and I don't fear you'll rob me or something.
Offering to barter for my services when I have no need for what you are offering. NO, I do not want to trade you sex for you printing shitty business cards for me. I actually designed and printed my own business cards previously and they were classy. This guy was just completely ridiculous. Shows up for appt and decides that is the appropriate time to let me know he has no cash, however, would love to give me an amazing deal on some business cards for myself! Appeared genuinely confused when I burst out laughing and just asked him to leave. He didn't make a fuss, and just left but WTF
When they acknowledge very clear and firm boundaries that I have (No DATY, Condoms for everything, no anal or anything near my ass, no fingering, rarely kissing and never for first-time clients, etc.) and then try to sweet talk me into breaking them or convincing me that my problem is that I just have never been with someone sexually talented enough to pleasure me, so I should just let them try. I have a shit ton of rules, always have and I don't break them. I don't have a bitchy personality, but I certainly have a lot of rules and don't do nearly half the shit their wives do. They seem confused that I am not "seeking pleasure" from them. I am seeking your money, you gigantic fool.
Contacting me about making an appt, then being fussy about my rates. I don't advertise anymore because I have many generous regulars that I can rely on if I need money, but omg when I was first starting out, guys were completely ridiculous about my rates. Look at my ad, see my photos, see my rates, if you don't find me attractive or don't think I'm worth the rate, then move on. Don't fucking contact me and try to haggle me down. I don't care that I charge way more than some girls. If you don't want to pay it, then just go away.
Show up incredibly drunk or high (bonus points if you drove to the appt) and then freak out when I ask you to leave because you are acting unstable.
Ask me to procure you drugs or underage girls... you know, like a cop would.
Hmmmm, this is fun, I'll try to remember other super lovely client encounters! Yay!
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