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Thread: I need advise please help

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    Curious Guest Sublover's Avatar
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    Default I need advise please help

    Hey ladies,
    Alittle about my self im 28, and I like to experiment in want to try almost anything. Bdsm, pegging, role play, ect... my problem is my wife will do some stuff with me I let a lot of stuff out telling her stuff I'm wanting to do, but she won't tell me anything. She won't let me in at all and I don't know what to do to get her loosen up to start moving forward more. We all have a fantasy right? Any advice would be greatly appreciated Thanks

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    Featured Member luvnrockets's Avatar
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    Default Re: I need advise please help

    We don't all necessarily have kinky fantasies, but it sounds like since your wife has already done some alternative sex things with you, she does have some things she likes/is open to.

    Have you straight up asked her "would you be interested in doing x?" or "what kinds of kinky things would you like to explore with me?"

    Honest, straight the fuck up, communication is best in this situation.
    "Do you do tech support in exclusive?"

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    Default Re: I need advise please help

    Some women are shy when talking about sex, just make sure she knows it's okay to talk about it and never get upset when you're trying to talk to her about it or she'll feel even more uncomfortable talking about it.

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    Default Re: I need advise please help

    Bring the mistress, lol

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    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
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    Default Re: I need advise please help

    Ella Faye has a good point. In general, women are trained from a young age to be prim and proper and not to be too sexual or guys with think you're slutty. Women get judged all the time for exploring their sexuality so in many situations it's safer to stay closed off than to risk being labeled by society then outcast as the slutty whore. Maybe she needs to be deprogrammed from that message now that she is married to you and can explore without judgement.

    I'd say don't rush her or get aggravated just take some time to appreciate her and help her relax. Go with her to a bookstore and pick out some erotic novels that she'd like. Maybe study Kama sutra. Does she like wine or champagne? Get her favorite bottle.

    Also if you're open to seeing a sex therapist they can help you and her in this area.

    Last case scenario, don't try to change her. You knew this was her personality when you married her. Simply put she may not be into the same kinks as you. Then you'll have to figure out if this is something she would be okay with you exploring on your own.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: I need advise please help

    Quote Originally Posted by Sublover View Post
    Hey ladies,
    Alittle about my self im 28, and I like to experiment in want to try almost anything. Bdsm, pegging, role play, ect... my problem is my wife will do some stuff with me I let a lot of stuff out telling her stuff I'm wanting to do, but she won't tell me anything. She won't let me in at all and I don't know what to do to get her loosen up to start moving forward more. We all have a fantasy right? Any advice would be greatly appreciated Thanks
    She won't 'let you in'? & this's your first post? Have you tried fetlife.com?


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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    Curious Guest baileyjay's Avatar
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    Default Re: I need advise please help

    Also if you're open to seeing a sex therapist they can help and her in this area.

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    God/dess Sam38g's Avatar
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    Default Re: I need advise please help

    Quote Originally Posted by Sublover View Post
    Hey ladies,
    Alittle about my self im 28, and I like to experiment in want to try almost anything. Bdsm, pegging, role play, ect... my problem is my wife will do some stuff with me I let a lot of stuff out telling her stuff I'm wanting to do, but she won't tell me anything. She won't let me in at all and I don't know what to do to get her loosen up to start moving forward more. We all have a fantasy right? Any advice would be greatly appreciated Thanks
    You never once mentioned what she is into.... which really reads selfish to me. What lengths do you go through to make her fantasies come true?
    You married someone who wasn't into it apparently & now want her to be, is that fair to her? Cause what you are requesting is mental mind set rather than physical act. Also men tend in this situations for the female to automatically know what they want with very little information, instructions.

    So she is to think it all up off the top of her head with no prior experience, desire or research?

    You are also asking her to take a dominate roll in the marriage. I am an alpha female but beta males are NOT a turn on for me. Did you ever take into consideration switching into a beta roll would affect her desire for you in general or how it would affect the marriage in general? Why weren't these things discussed before marriage?

    She maybe afraid of hurting your feelings if she isn't into it. She may feel left out & not sexy since she now has to take the lead roll in the sex department.

    No where in your post did I see concern for her wants, needs, desires or how it makes her feel. It is all about how to get her to do what you want which is also topping from the bottom.

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