My ex has finally given me the ultimatum of "When am I going to get the fuck out?" according to him since he got home it blew up into a huge fight. I've been ill from this breakup and was about to eat when he mentioned us talking like a dick.
My ex has finally given me the ultimatum of "When am I going to get the fuck out?" according to him since he got home it blew up into a huge fight. I've been ill from this breakup and was about to eat when he mentioned us talking like a dick.
Last edited by BambiCutie; 06-15-2016 at 12:08 AM.





Aww, I'm so sorry hun..do you have anywhere to go, or someone to stay with? How about someone to talk to?
MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP
-Eartha Kitt
Wow. Don't put up with that any longer than you have to.
What is the rent agreement?
“Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”
I'm a mess ladies and will try to decode this as best I can..so its easily readable, but tonight I let my anger really take over, pretty much exploding about everything letting things out. The rent agreement is a mo check, he owns the place making it easier, have till the end of this year. (I don't plan to stay here long, its just an idea of where things stand currently.) How do you stop the terrible crying outbursts? I don't cry loud only silent and it becomes nearly impossible to sleep.. Does anyone know how to control the crying or make the pain less intense? Its a crushing feeling deep down.. He approaching me in the middle of just eating, in a boss/assistant type of way, all pissed off looking for a fight instead of just asking rationally to talk.
Drama warning
What left me in an utter confusion was we have slept with each other twice since the breakup (shame..shame..shame..) He has been pushy about getting me to leave suddenly out of the blue and after venting my frustrations about them gawking at each other he didn't really say anything other than sorry under his breath.. Then said "I wish she could come here so she could explain herself that nothing is going on between us." When I mentioned it being invasive telling a co-worker about me or even the relationship, sending all these pictures back and forth of her Father's boat, memes, a newborn baby at work, all these pics, discussing all sorts of crap and giggling in between texts till the phone buzzes off the bathroom counter, throughout the day and at night on his night stand. He tried to say it was normal being they are friends and he should be able to communicate with the opposite sex. (Missing the picture entirely) He has called this girl sweet during our very first argument after mentioning my feelings regarding the amount of texting that was going on, putting my feelings down claiming she was a good girl and I was wrong to say anything about her raising his voice. (2 years ago) Didn't say anything in the door way when I mentioned them staring at each other during the holiday party, races and other events.. (They spend/spent 40 hrs a week together) I'm not feeling different regarding how I see him and have been struggling to pull through this with staying offline and taking extra steps to move forward, getting out, meeting people. Soon as I do, something hits the fan.. He wants me to believe that the relationship ended on my faults of doubt and this girl had no impact on the breakup. He started working on the house, changing his wardrobe and wants me to think this girl is just a friend when there have been signs for 3 years. The first time meeting her she was yelling out "I need to find me a date, SINGLE man!.." No other word came out of her mouth till we reached the ticket counter and leaned over me to get to him once we sat down for the event.
When the fight came to a rest I asked him the same question as before, that he refused to answer.
Me: If you told me about this girl in the shower and mentioned us going to dinner to meet up the next day, why did you lie to her saying I overslept?" His first answer was "It was because you were so jealous and all this, see!" except I didn't react badly, just very..very confused and it was in a 24hr period. (Given her Father was going) Now the answer is "I didn't want you to appear badly as a friend to her, since you two never met.." It came out so weird and didn't make sense.. The last relationship he held ended a very similar way, except he ended up having sex with his ex's friend. I couldn't tell who was who when he showed me pictures, thought her friend was his gf..
My plan is to keep moving forward, understand self love and acknowledge that the relationship ended for good, OBVIOUS reasons on both parts.. I have a lot to work on with trust and invading before opening up to anyone in the near future.![]()
This guys sounds like he's trying to have open relationships. But he claims you are too jealous, which is his fault because most women are not going for that, and if they do its a certain way to go about it so everyone is happy. But he just seems careless and selfish.
If he want you to leave before the end of the year when your rent agreement ends then only thing you can do is find a better place. But get as much help as you can and don't try to do things by yourself since you're in a tough emotional state.
Since he's so adamant about you moving out, you could use this as a way to get him to help pay your moving expenses. Dead serious, he should give you some "parting cash" if he wants you to move out sooner and make this break up easy.
You may want to talk to someone trustworthy to help you with your emotional difficulties. Crying uncontrollably sounds like possible depression - I think you mentioned before this is interfering with your work also so please let someone qualified help you so you don't have to continue to suffer and or things get worse. I don't know you personally so just take this last paragraph with a grain of salt.
“Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”





THIS^..esp the bolded parts, Ms.P pretty much nailed it.
Also, you need to stop guilting yourself about the sex part..I mean don''t anymore (personally I wouldn't, not making judgments so don't take it wrong pls,you done w/that now it's in the past) cause you're hurting yourself
Try to find something to @ least occupy yourself, that's GOOD for you, to help the healing before you're gone for good..I'd recommend a 12 step group for codependency right off the bat. Can you make yourself get out in nature (@ least a bit) get involved in art class, exercise, (park district stuff?) Something to get you OUT of that HOUSE to recharge yourself.
I actually went thru a similar thing, many yrs ago, (including the sex part, moving out & the other girl) it reads to me like yea Ms P said about 'open relations' but more like he's just using you/her for his drama bs & for him to 'get a charge' out of, stroke his ego type of thing, I hope that makes sense.
He sounds like an IMMATURE ASSHOLE< sorry.
You deserve & need so much more. I mean breakups are a bitch anyways, but when you have to be in the environment it's 10X worse.
Remember: the only thing you can really control here is yourself, not him/her.
I don't know your sitch about financial-wise, but is there any way you can GTFO, sooner rather than later? Again, like Ms P says, ask him for $..if not, don't extra stress, you will just have to work harder to deal w/this.
Hope this helps? Take care, good luck.
Last edited by whirlerz; 06-15-2016 at 09:08 AM.
MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP
-Eartha Kitt
Thank you that really hit home for me, I've been getting out a lot and will be keeping these things in mind. We had a few screaming matches and even though it was hard to sleep I was able to get some rest following posts. Thank you!





Good! You need to take care of YOU, & do YOU.
If he starts any shite of any kind, just get up & walk away..seriously. He sounds beyond any reasonable discussion anyway. If you can't leave, just put some headphones on, music or not. Distance yourself mentally as much as possible til you can put the physical distance in.
Good luck, take care.
MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP
-Eartha Kitt
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