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Thread: Serial Monogamy?

  1. #1
    God/dess seashell's Avatar
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    Default Serial Monogamy?

    Deleted my whining. <3 <3

    But if you have thoughts about/experiences with serial monogamy -- a.k.a. always having a boyfriend/girlfriend and never being single for long -- feel free to post!
    Last edited by seashell; 07-30-2016 at 12:12 PM.

  2. #2
    God/dess Selina M's Avatar
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    Default Re: Serial Monogamy?

    I don't think it's a problem... with caveats. The key (I think) to being a 'healthy serial monogamist' is NOT being codependent. You have to have friends, hobbies, etc. and not let your happiness revolve around that person. If you are lucky enough to keep finding dudes that are relationship material, that's AWESOME, but if they're ehhhh and you're still entering relationships with them, that would be a sign you have another subconscious motive.

    'Red flags' in your post are 1) still crying over the second guy; if you aren't over him, it's not good to move into another relationship 2) Filling a friend void; that's never healthy; you don't want to end up using the SO as your only friend.

    My SO is a serial monogamist, he's had nothing but multiple-year relationships; I think the longest he ever went was like 6 months between. Some people are just wired to be 'one-person' people. It did become a problem for us briefly when he went through the "FOMO" thing about 'dating around & being single', and I suspect that would never have happened had we not been fighting constantly.
    The only caveat he had to do (that I mentioned above) is to get some friends and find a balance so he wasn't depending on me as his sole companion; that was breeding a lot of resentment because he felt he was dependent on me and it freaked him out. So yeah, don't let that happen. Get some more friends
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

    "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

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