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Thread: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

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    Default Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    Hey everyone, I have been having a really crazy few months.

    I had sex with one guy un protected on June 25th, then I had unprotected anal sex with my now ex boyfriend last on August 21st, but gave him a blowjob and I swallowed on August 27th.

    Well, the night of August 27th after he went to bed I snooped through his facebook and found this message to some girl he was talking to. He was telling her he likes getting "f*cked" by black and dominican men with no condom and all this other crazy shit about escorting. He also told her I was a cam girl.

    Well needless to say I woke him up and had a mental breakdown, he assured me he was just "high" on coke that night he sent the messages and that he says crazy things to people when he's high and upset about something. Well what really freaked me out was a picture of his butt in women's underwear that he sent her too.

    We went to planned parenthood the next morning and got 4th generation rapid HIV tests, and we both came out negative.

    I have been in such a tail spin ever since, I can never seem to relax and I just worry all night and all day that I have HIV now.

    I live on my own and my only income is camming, and camming now triggers my anxiety. I find I start having anxiety and panic attacks in the middle of shows when I have to talk about sex, eating cum, having unprotected sex, ETC with my customers.

    I am planning on getting another test or 2 obviously, but I am terrified all the time.

    Has anyone else gone through this or something similar or just an HIV scare in general ? I feel so alone and have noone else to talk to about this.

    Also I want to add I broke up with my ex that night, but we still talk frequently and he always assures me that I have nothing to worry about and that it was just something he made up, and he would go for more tests with me in the future to make me feel better. So I have come to beleive him or at least WANT to while I am in this NIGHTMARE window period. I am 24 and I have only had sex with 3 men in my whole life, 2 mentioned here and the first was my ex boyfriend of 4 years so I do not do this type of stuff, I just had a bad few months and I acted out and am now REGRETTING it horribly.

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    So sorry youre going through that, that must be a horrible feeling. I hope the future tests come back negative for you as well. I dont have any experience with it but i just wanted to say im sorry youre having this hard time in your life right now. hugs to you.

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    Well just be thankful it's negative. Is there an incubation period or did they tell you to follow up? Just be glad and quit worrying. Now learn from this an use condoms - never trust a mans word that is not your husband and has not proven himself to be faithful/monogamous. If you have open relationship he should wear condoms (like you should see him putting on the condom and not just take his word)
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    First, I want to give you a big HUG because it takes courage to be so vulnerable and open.

    You did the right thing by bringing the monster out of the dark by getting yourself tested. Thank God you're negative. You don't have to explain your sexual history. Bad choices don't make you a bad person. We all do the best of which we know how and when you know better, you do better.

    I would suggest seeing a professional therapist to help you with your anxiety. Someone who's invested in your well being to help you sort out things and heal.
    Nothing is ever a mistake if you can learn from it.
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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    thank you both for the replies, I am confused about the window periods and that is why I am here for advice.

    apparently it takes 4 - 12 weeks for the antibodies to show up in tests, but the 4th generation tests we took test for a protein called p24 that shows up within 2 weeks to 28 days.

    the women at planned parenthood made me feel like I was clean, they told me it is supposed to show up after 2 weeks with those tests.

    I mainly went because I wanted to see his test result because I knew mine would be negative since it hadn't been long enough for it to show up on my test, but I guess I felt better seeing it as negative, but then the worries started coming back a few days later. Thinking he obviously could have had sex with people at any point in time, maybe the last person he had sex with was less than 2 weeks from that test.

    It is a true nightmare, I have never been so terrified in my life. Camming seriously makes it 2000 times worse, but I have to do it. But it is becoming difficult, I have started to have breakdowns during shows, to the point where a few of my regulars actually stayed in private / exclusive shows talking to me about it. I know I shouldn't tell them this stuff, that's why I posted here instead.

    You are SO right miss.ap1600 I will NEVER have unprotected sex with ANYONE again, this is a NIGHTMARE

    Also thank you Marina, your reply came up after I posted this.

    Does anyone have more info about these window periods?

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    Wetkisses,
    We are here to provide you with moral support but I believe when it comes to the physical stuff, you should get tested as much as you would like until you can feel completely assured that you're negative.
    Quote Originally Posted by ~Carmen~ View Post
    I can see you being 90 and flipping your long hair, still teasing the boys.



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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    Yes girl. I've been there. I had unprotected sex more times than I can remember .... Very unwise.

    I was to scared to get an hiv test so I donated blood and let them test it. Don't ask the rationale. So I get a letter in the mail. I'm scared sh*tless and didn't open for weeks, convinced the letter was them informing me I had full blown AIDS and not ready to face the truth. My dumba$$ finally opens the letter and it's like "thanks for donating!"

    So yeah. It wasn't until my third std scare - I'm hard headed at times - that I finally was like I gotta quit listening to these horny dudes (who most likely are fucking off with other women or men and not telling me) letting them control my health and sanity.

    So yeah.

    Here's the info from CDC on the "window" period. Depends on the type of test you get

    No HIV test can detect HIV immediately after infection. If you think you’ve been exposed to HIV, talk to your health care provider as soon as possible.

    The time between when a person gets HIV and when a test can accurately detect it is called the window period. The window period varies from person to person and also depends upon the type of HIV test.

    Most HIV tests are antibody tests. Antibodies are produced by your immune system when you’re exposed to viruses like HIV or bacteria. HIV antibody tests look for these antibodies to HIV in your blood or oral fluid.

    The soonest an antibody test will detect infection is 3 weeks. Most (approximately 97%), but not all, people will develop detectable antibodies within 3 to 12 weeks (21 to 84 days) of infection.

    A combination, or fourth-generation, test looks for both HIV antibodies and antigens. Antigens are foreign substances that cause your immune system to activate. The antigen is part of the virus itself and is present during acute HIV infection (the phase of infection right after people are infected but before they develop antibodies to HIV).

    Most, but not all people, will make enough antigens and antibodies for fourth-generation or combination tests to accurately detect infection 2 to 6 weeks (13 to 42 days) after infection.

    A nucleic acid test (NAT) looks for HIV in the blood. It looks for the virus and not the antibodies to the virus. This test is very expensive and not routinely used for screening individuals unless they recently had a high-risk exposure or a possible exposure with early symptoms of HIV infection.

    Most, but not all people, will have enough HIV in their blood for a nucleic acid test to detect infection 1 to 4 weeks (7 to 28 days) after infection.

    Ask your health care provider about the window period for the test you’re taking. If you’re using a home test, you can get that information from the materials included in the test’s package. If you get an HIV test within 3 months after a potential HIV exposure and the result is negative, get tested again in 3 more months to be sure.

    If you learned you were HIV-negative the last time you were tested, you can only be sure you’re still negative if you haven’t had a potential HIV exposure since your last test. If you’re sexually active, continue to take actions to prevent HIV, like using condoms the right way every time you have sex and taking medicines to prevent HIV if you’re at high risk. Learn the right way to use a male condom.

    Learn more about how to protect yourself, and get information tailored to meet your needs from CDC’s HIV Risk Reduction Tool (BETA).
    Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 09-24-2016 at 07:35 AM.
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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    I can't give you any advice on the HIV scare. I'm really sorry you're going through that. But it sounds like he's just a "sissy slut". Like, literally. A sissy is a guy who likes to wear women's panties (and other feminine clothing) and often they like to talk about getting fucked by men, to other women. ESPECIALLY black men (with huge dicks). I see it all the time. I have been a professional Domme for nearly 10 years and often they love to talk to other women about it, especially because they feel like they cant share that with their significant other.

    Honesty, I highly doubt he was actually having sex with men. A lot of guys who are like this and feel like they have no outlet drink or do drugs and when intoxicated, just go crazy with the fantasy. Obviously make sure and do the testing. But just to try to put your mind at ease a little.. I seriously see this kind of thing all the time. 9 times out of 10 they never actually fuck other guys.





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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    I have dealt with sooooooooo many of these kind of situations as I have been single for 17 yrs!.. I got so tired of having to go through this bullshit I became celibate.. I deserve better than this nonsense.. I don't know how comforting I sound.. but take a deep breath.. I have had unprotected sex MANY times and I can't say I ever had an STD to date.. .. only 3? You need to calm down, I know it only takes 1 .. but calm down when I tell you i have had sex with 60 men a lot unprotected.. i was raped , date raped, and whatever a lot. .. gullible and naïve i guess you can say.. well after ALL of that i have no STD's.. granted i have cleansed, and juiced and been following healthy practices the whole time.. but you only had sex with 3 guys.. when you know better you do better.. let this be a lesson to be a lot more careful in the future.



    Quote Originally Posted by wetkisses View Post
    Hey everyone, I have been having a really crazy few months.

    I had sex with one guy un protected on June 25th, then I had unprotected anal sex with my now ex boyfriend last on August 21st, but gave him a blowjob and I swallowed on August 27th.

    Well, the night of August 27th after he went to bed I snooped through his facebook and found this message to some girl he was talking to. He was telling her he likes getting "f*cked" by black and dominican men with no condom and all this other crazy shit about escorting. He also told her I was a cam girl.

    Well needless to say I woke him up and had a mental breakdown, he assured me he was just "high" on coke that night he sent the messages and that he says crazy things to people when he's high and upset about something. Well what really freaked me out was a picture of his butt in women's underwear that he sent her too.

    We went to planned parenthood the next morning and got 4th generation rapid HIV tests, and we both came out negative.

    I have been in such a tail spin ever since, I can never seem to relax and I just worry all night and all day that I have HIV now.

    I live on my own and my only income is camming, and camming now triggers my anxiety. I find I start having anxiety and panic attacks in the middle of shows when I have to talk about sex, eating cum, having unprotected sex, ETC with my customers.

    I am planning on getting another test or 2 obviously, but I am terrified all the time.

    Has anyone else gone through this or something similar or just an HIV scare in general ? I feel so alone and have noone else to talk to about this.

    Also I want to add I broke up with my ex that night, but we still talk frequently and he always assures me that I have nothing to worry about and that it was just something he made up, and he would go for more tests with me in the future to make me feel better. So I have come to beleive him or at least WANT to while I am in this NIGHTMARE window period. I am 24 and I have only had sex with 3 men in my whole life, 2 mentioned here and the first was my ex boyfriend of 4 years so I do not do this type of stuff, I just had a bad few months and I acted out and am now REGRETTING it horribly.

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    Quote Originally Posted by wetkisses View Post

    apparently it takes 4 - 12 weeks for the antibodies to show up in tests, but the 4th generation tests we took test for a protein called p24 that shows up within 2 weeks to 28 days.
    Yup. You have to wait three months before taking a HIV test for a definitive result.

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    ^^ The 4th gen. tests are really effective. Its not like it was before they can detect the protein from HIV in very minute quantities. If you had the 4th gen. test then let your mind rest a lot. It would have detected something if It was there. Go and have another test to just close the case but the chance of you having HIV now is so low its odds are greater then any lottery on the planet. Your going to be fine!

    I also say that because, worse case scenario, even if it did come back positive next time, which it won't, but if it did its still okay. Its not the death sentence it was back in the 80's. They drugs they use to treat HIV are so effective at keeping the virus from spreading in your body that anything less then a 4th gen. test cannot detect the proteins in infected people.

    Case in Point Charlie Sheen. He is HIV positive right. BUT if he had anything less then the 4th gen. test it would show as Negative becauase the HIV drugs keep the virus from spreading in him! This also means he wont suffer the side effects on his immunity system that is the cause of death for AIDs infected people. Even if you did have it you could still live a full normal life. Get married, have children and not infect another person.

    I understand your scared. I work in porn and every time there is a HIV scare Im off to the clinic to get my test done again. Actually Im there so often they dont even ask what Ive come for they just hand me a cup to pee in and we begin lol. You really need to talk to a professional who can help you to deal with the anxiety that this fear has created or it could get worse. Your having a normal reaction but you dont have the tools to deal with it and this has created your anxiety. The great news is this is super easy to treat and will help you going forward in all areas of your life so go see someone (probably planned parenthood can recommend someone) who can help you to understand how to calm down and manage your fear so it doesnt become anxiety.

    Big hugs, we are taught to fear HIV so much that it is scary to think you might be exposed but from what your saying here there is almost no chance that you have anything more then an important life lesson. Thanks for posting its good for all of us to be reminded of what men can be and that we need to protect ourselves first!

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    One more thing. Dont be scared! but if the last time you were tested you only did the HIV test then next time please be sure to do testing for all other STDs as well. Just to be on the safe side!

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    At least you confronted him and got tested. Me, I'd have to ditch him. Whether he actually fucks guys (is he the 1 guy out of 10 that does?) you'll never know. He's really not going to tell you the truth. Getting coked up? I'm guessing that can be a great excuse for I'm doing things I'm not 100% mentally ok with, but I just can't control myself b/c of the coke.
    But, then again I really feel 9 out of 10 guys can't be trusted because of their dicks. Unless you're glued together 100% of the time you'll never know what he does with it or how deviant he is.
    You could also let him be your panty sissy bitchboy and fuck him in the ass with a strapon. You;ll get a better gauge of how big of a dick he can handle when you go shopping for one together and see how he takes what he chooses.

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    Yes, this also ^ I am 100% behind ditching him. And yes 9 out of 10 cant be trusted, even the nicest guy who loves you the most can cheat. I was just saying that to try and put her more at ease. These sissy guys though, do not waste your time with them. They will lie and spiral deeper and deeper into their kink and more often than not it doesnt include you. They are some of the worst guys to date.





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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    it happened to me few times as well; i was an escort till 2011 and like 2 oe 3 times, i had sex unprotected with regulars that became some what my bf's. Unwise and prone to idiocy, yet it happens and it happens a lot and yes, it happened to me to think that i could have caught hiv and i didnt do the test, i was too scared and i didnt do it for over 5 years till i got pregnant with my last child which was in 2015. When i did the test, i was so relieved that ive done it, coz seriously i dont know how i could manage to wait so much to have it done. But hiv is not so easy to get and Im sure u are fine. Do the other tests and be wise next time, sex only with protection. hugs and kisses.
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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    The fact he told someone else about you being a cam girl is uncalled for.. I've been through a scare recently with a guy I was dating who happened to be f**king his male roommate/friends in the shower occasionally. You should have blood tests..anything that can be done to ensure you are not positive and try not to obsess over the thought.

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    Quote Originally Posted by MistressX View Post
    Yes, this also ^ I am 100% behind ditching him. And yes 9 out of 10 cant be trusted, even the nicest guy who loves you the most can cheat. I was just saying that to try and put her more at ease. These sissy guys though, do not waste your time with them. They will lie and spiral deeper and deeper into their kink and more often than not it doesnt include you. They are some of the worst guys to date.
    I don't know what a sissy guy is but also guys who are narcissists/sociopaths/psychopath/other personality disorders have sexuality that is fluid so to speak. They may either be sexual deviants, closet gay/bisexual, or they may not consider themselves gay/bisexual because they only have sex with men by "default" if they can't get it from women (ex. incarceration). They are notorious cheaters and liars.

    Hopefully your ex and the previous guy are just average guys.

    In any case, try not to worry about past events you have no control over.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    I dont have any advice but I wish you all the best and I hope things turn out for the better!

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    I was married to one.

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    Thank you all for replying it means a lot toe in this stressful time.

    I guess to add insult to Injury I am a Trans gender woman

    Last night I became so anxious I changed my number just so he would stop contacting me because I just couldn't take it anymore.

    I cannot beleive I could do this to myself... I will never trust anyone again to sleep with them unprotected unless they are my husband. If I already don't have HIV

    The only thing giving me hope is some of the stories you girls have added, as well as the fact that his test came back negative. So that means he would have had to be infected within 4-8 weeks since the test. Obviously that doesn't mean I'm in the clear, but it's just hope I'm grasping for to get myself into a mental place where I can function.

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    I feel for you girl. Lot's hugs.

    I had an ex who gave me an STI because they were not honest with their past relations and continued fucking anything with two legs. That hurt more than the cheating. The fact that she had no deisregard for my sexual health was a wake up that she didn't care about me. She just acted like she did to get what she wanted. I'm glad you broke up with him. Even if he assures you there is nothing to worry about, you can no longer trust him. Why was he honest with this random girl about his fantasies and sexual conquests and not you? I don't by "coked up" as an excuse. Oh and cocaine addicts don't make good relationships. That's a reason in itself to break up with them.

    If I ever date another person other than my husband, I will now require STD testings. I can no longer trust "oh I'm clean, I got tested 2 months ago."



    Also if you do come back positive, just remember you can still live a healthy sex life.
    http://www.everydayhealth.com/hiv-ai...-with-hiv.aspx





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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    No matter what use a condom. No matter how long you are dating someone USE A CONDOM. No one EVER REGRETS using a condom. Don't swallow anymore. Having sex without a condom will NOT make them love you. Swallowing their cum will NOT make them love you

    NO matter what use condoms. If you do decide to go exclusive & not use them then going & getting tested, sharing results is a MUST!

    Think about it, is 30 minutes of fun in the sack worth spending the rest of your life taking expensive HIV meds? Do you know how much HIV meds cost a month? Condoms are way cheaper.

    If a guy doesn't want to use condoms and gives me trouble over it. I stop seeing him immediately.

    Your EX is an established liar, he will lie to get what he wants from you. Lots of people think it is okay to lie in order to get what they want in life.

    Date, date often. Just don't have sex or blowjobs. See how long they date you without sex to prove their intentions. I mean dinners at nice places, going to the movies. A person who is willing to date, be seen with you out and about, meet their friends, & family shows their true intentions. Harder they push for sex, more you know they don't value you as a person or long term relationship. A person who wants a long term commitment doesn't have any problems getting to know you other than just sex.

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    Default Re: Having an HIV scare, I need advice and comfort :(

    hey everyone thank you for the replies, your stories and advice really got me through the past few days <3

    Just keeping you all updated I went for another test today, so 5 weeks since sex and 4 since oral and I was negative. I guess there is a 5% chance I could be positive, but obviously a 95% chance that I'm not makes me feel much much better.

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