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Thread: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

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    Default Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    I've been dancing for about a year and I also pole dance in my spare time because I like it.
    In a pole lessons forum I came across this article




    What are your thoughts? Especially for any of you that have been working for at least a few years.
    Do you agree with the feminists in the comments section?
    I always thought feminism was in support of women choosing what to do with our bodies.


    Last edited by Alyssa976; 09-24-2016 at 04:57 AM.

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    Oh wowww.

    My confession of shame here- my brother is a way better pole dancer than me. Unfortunately he doesn't have breasts so he can't make a living wage at it. But I do.

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    Well on the one hand at least they admit that strippers invented pole dancing because most pole hobbyists will make bizarre connections between Chinese pole/Mallakhamba, which is ridiculous because a)both of those sports still exist today and b)they are practiced by males. The pole dancing that pole studios teach is straight out of the strip club.


    But... we live in a patriarchal society surrounded by rape culture. Violence against women IS the norm. We have shirts called "wife beaters" for fucks sake. Choosing or shunning a hobby isn't going to do a damn thing about that.

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    This infantalizes women to an alarming degree..the writer seems to take the same approach man-splaners do.."you poor, stupid, simple minded little female..don't you know that you don't really know what you want and you can't really make your own decisions about your own body? Aww, it's ok , I will enlighten you *pats head" . Barf.
    I also find it innately sexist that porn is seen only for men. That men are always the sexual ones and women are always the sexy ones, it's the same narrative in regular patriarchal culture..plenty of women watch and enjoy porn!! YES, some porn is violent against women, but not all! Those two do not necessarily go hand in hand! And being trafficked into sex work is NOT being a sex worker..it's being a rape victim/slave. Totally different.
    The thing is, I make the decision about what I want to do with MY body and I make the money off of it and hold the power over it. I am not being taken advantage of or degraded in my mind, and I don't have some man making money off my body, I have the control.
    It's a very convoluted confusing line in feminism between sexual freedom of expression and right to say yes And "objectification for the male gaze" because as I've said before this culture simultaneously slut shames women for being sexual and independent , but then tells them that that's all they are good for. Being naked or sexual is automatically seen as "degrading" for women or less powerful. Why?
    Plus most of these "feminists" don't really know a lot about the sex Indistry I don't think. Most civilians think all we do is prance around in thongs on stage and have flat abs is all the job requires. I love my job cause for me it's mostly about making customers feel connected to another person and giving them company. I'm a "regulars" type of dancer so for me tats what it's mostly about. I love my job.
    I find it funny how nobody says shit about magic mike being degrading.

    So yea tl;dr , I think these ppl have "internalized" a bit themselves from the patriarchy, like ridiculous whorephobia an the belief that a sexual or naked woman =degrading
    Last edited by We had a rabbit like you; 09-24-2016 at 12:16 PM.

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    ^^exactly - sex work IS about sex, and yes it is work, that would be why it has "work" in its name. Rape / sexual crime is about power, and hatred. It is not work. It is not about sex. Conflating the two is strictly for obtaining funding from idiots. Further it wastes money that could be going to real victims, and stigmatizes powerful, confident, professional women as perma-victims.
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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    Exactly. And the whole "johns are scum" posters? Huh? Why can't we let two consenting grown adults have sex if they want, whether or not money is involved?? What breeds violence against sex workers is criminalizing and stigmatizing us and our work so we have no legal recourse. I've had many great clients that I genuinely respected and had a professional relationship with, but for some reason they are scum and I'm a victim..rrright.

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    Yawn. Again another article showcasing the author's ignorance and lack of awareness regarding society and how it has related to the treatment of women since the beginning of history.

    Did it ever occur to these so-called "feminists" that sex work and feminism are not mutually exclusive?? Also, who decided to appoint these critics the standard for feminism anyway?

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    What did I fucking read? Holy shit. Lol this is why I can't get behind feminism. I have religious zealots on one side telling me what I can and can't do with my body and on the other I have bitter feminists who are stuck in this hive mind trying to tell me what I can and can't do with my body.

    This is why I'm an egalitarian.

    Oh and strip clubs aren't solely created to exploit women. It's to exploit horny men and to take their moneys. Really the victim of strip clubs are you dudes.





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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    Yuck! More third-wave feminist prudish crap. Most people know that sexualized violence is apart of all societies. Frankly, they need to look at women's history and learn that many sex workers held more power back in the day than most housewives. Sex workers such as La Païva and La Belle Otero held more money and power in the 19th century than most women will ever see even in the 21st century.Thus, it makes no sense to keep nagging about the sex industry normalizing violence against women. Deranged mindsets, extreme misogyny, hate and apathy normalized violence against women. Not the sex industry

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    I noticed a theme in their comments was that you don't have to experience something to write about it. They took it a step further by being able to not know basically anything about something to write about it.

    I'm not degraded at work. I set my boundaries and hold firm to them. I don't think I'm naive in saying the majority of my clients are not rapists and murderers.

    Also that whole thing about Chinese and Indian pole origins was super annoying. On the one hand you have a bunch of wacky radical feminists against strippers insisting pole and stripping (and violence) is connected and on the other hand you have pole dancers against strippers insisting pole and stripping has no connection.

    I'm used to people wanting to distance themselves from women in the sex industry but I'm new to this rad-fem craycray.

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    Quote Originally Posted by DonaDiabla View Post
    Yuck! More third-wave feminist prudish crap.
    I agree, Donadiabla. This has been really bothering me. Feminism has turned bad. I always identified as a feminist (though I really don't like labels) but now I am afraid to because of crap articles like this. A little off topic, but for anyone interested, please understand feminism wasn't supposed to be this way. Feminism meant things like equal pay, stopping street harassment, fair maternity leave, etc. It makes me sad that a powerful movement to change things for the better has been overrun with bitter women with issues. The whole sex work is degrading thing pisses me off because real feminist should STOP putting this onus on the women and instead address the patriarchal society that causes this shit.

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    Quote Originally Posted by SuperJa View Post
    ....most pole hobbyists will make bizarre connections between Chinese pole/Mallakhamba, which is ridiculous because a)both of those sports still exist today and b)they are practiced by males. The pole dancing that pole studios teach is straight out of the strip club.
    I think you are wrong in this. There was a youtube video I watched recently that described how it lingered over from male sports into women dancing. Women started doing it, but to create more attraction, women started removing clothing. So really, the pole helped to create strippers and strip clubs.
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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    Oh and strip clubs aren't solely created to exploit women. It's to exploit horny men and to take their moneys. Really the victim of strip clubs are you dudes
    True enough. But we still love it.

    The militant feminism starting in the 70's is/was extremely uncomfortable for me, and it always seemed artificial and only based on anger which was pretty much deserved. But it just served to escalate the anger. I suppose there always will be men whose experience with women, likely in early youth, has confused them and diverted them from being able to appreciate women. The combination makes it much the worse.

    I dislike the 'extreme' porn; it's disgusting and extremely objectifying. What I like more is a loving couple expressing their sexuality, kissing, hugging, etc. In the clubs, once, there was a stripper I really liked who showed a lot of affection for her regulars, incl. me, with genuine hugs etc. I kept hoping for a genuine off-site friendship with her, though I never pressured her for it. I mostly like the fantasy of seduction in the club scene. I guess I am not normal.

    Expresses my take on women, honestly.
    Golding on Women.jpg
    Last edited by threlayer; 10-09-2016 at 07:15 AM.
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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    Default Re: Sex industry normalizing violence against women

    Quote Originally Posted by SubSpace666 View Post
    I think you are wrong in this. There was a youtube video I watched recently that described how it lingered over from male sports into women dancing. Women started doing it, but to create more attraction, women started removing clothing. So really, the pole helped to create strippers and strip clubs.
    The first pole performance in a strip club was in 1968. I assure you stripping in some form or another existed long before that point.

    The style of pole dancing copied by pole hobbyists, with its brass poles and pleaser heels, was copied from strippers. Former strippers were some of the first instructors. If pole dancing wasn't so strongly associated with strippers, it would be just another gymnastic sport. Why do women flock to pole studios but don't study traditional Chinese pole? Chinese pole isn't ~edgy~ and ~sexy~. Pole sports became huge because strippers do them. If we gained notoriety for some other aerial sport or dance style, they'd be copying that too.

    Pole hobbyists are adamant that this isn't the case though, so there's a ton of invented history out there because they are ~artists~ and not just dirty strippers.

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