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Thread: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

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    Veteran Member limecoconut's Avatar
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    Tired No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    Just hoping for a little validation/understanding/venting here. Anyone else find themselves to be quite the workaholic? Idk if I should feel bad about it or feel happy that I am making things happen.

    I cam a few days a week, film on the other days (write, film, direct, produce, edit, publish, everything.. am managing 4 stores and filming with multiple people on a regular basis,) I do kik sessions on my phone throughout the day, stay up on social media for work, blog, do promo, network, I run a community group in my city, am in two serious relationships and randomly dating people here and there (who I almost regret ever hanging out with cuz there's just not room for anything regular) and have a dog and have mental illness like WHAT am I doing seriously lol...

    But.. I think stacking up my schedule is the only way I can survive... I guess I just feel weird/guilty not having time for friends... My friends are the people I work with and am in relationships with and then the few people who are living their own lives and we get together a few x a month and have a steady, powerful, understanding connection. Idk how to deal with the fact of all the friends I am only moderately close to or have grown apart from or acquaintances or meeting new people who ask me week after week to hang out and it's literally always "well I have 5 shoots in the next 10 days, editing and camming on the other days, this meeting then this meeting then a chill day..." I honestly don't have time for anyone who doesn't fit in with my goals right now. Just...hanging out? Am I alone here in feeling like I just can't fathom having time for that?! lol... Maybe it's just weird thinking I have to put limits and boundaries on something like friendship?

    Idk. Can anyone else relate?!
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    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    First of all, you have to put limits and boundaries on all relationship not just friendship so people don't behave badly. People enjoy themselves more when they are respecting you and your boundaries.

    Do you really feel weird/guilty for not having time for friends or do you feel pressured into believing you should have time for friends? There's a big difference.

    The older I get, I enjoy my own company. I do what I want, when I want, how I want happily by myself. There is no better feeling!
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    Heeeey! I will go weeks without other human interaction other than my husband because I rather work. My best friend is the same way, but we are friends who can go weeks or months without talking and just pick up where we left off. I have lost friends from this behavior of mine. But who wants friends who are needy for attention?

    The biggest is my family. Because I prioritize my work, I don't go home that often. I went home to visit for the first time in 3 years last spring. I got shit for it. But hey my income is based solely on commission. I don't have a salary. Also I have to invest in my own retirement, and at the rate I'm going, I could possibly not work after 40.

    This is my life. I have to survive and make sure my future is secured. Social time can wait.





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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I agree 100%. I've turned into a workaholic myself lately with camming bc I pretty much dislike most of the people around here in my area. Too much drama, I'd rather work & survive. Social gatherings can DEF wait their turn!
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I've been working my booty off lately, because I desperately need the money, and my social life is pretty nonexistent. The few invites I've had from people, I've avoided... I do something fun *maybe* once a week, and the rest of the time I'm camming or dancing. It's lonely. Dancing makes me exhausted and camming makes me feel like a shut-in, lol.

    It helps to have friends who are willing to be flexible. And who can handle seeing you sporadically.

    But if you've managed to make quality friends as a sex worker, I'd say it's worth it to make the extra effort to keep them around.

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    Featured Member Violethollywood's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    Quote Originally Posted by xxxGothBarbie View Post
    I agree 100%. I've turned into a workaholic myself lately with camming bc I pretty much dislike most of the people around here in my area. Too much drama, I'd rather work & survive. Social gatherings can DEF wait their turn!
    exactly. THIS. ALL THIS.

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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    Totally me. I've been anti social since I was a kid Family reunions are always forced, and you're okay with having LDR with everyone, including your bestie who you catch up with every few months.

    I used to hate logging into work but I've really started to be addicted to the work. It's like playing the work lotto and once your Hustle gets going and the money is pumping in, it's like- fuck a social life, I'm saving up for retirement!

    We know the way the world is that SSI/senior benefits may not be an option in our futures. I don't mind working through my youth because early retirement is possoble, and my ass is going to be covered. We can no longer relyou on others. I just love that we have the freedom of choice. And theven spoiling we do to ourselves and our families assures is that our dreams can come true while most have a glass ceiling.

    That being said, I do have cam friends I socialIze with daily, and I also do some in person meets when social time is needed or a vacation. But I really do love harboring cash!




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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I'm the same, I see my mom but that's about it. I moved from my home town, leaving everyone behind. The only social interaction I get is online with friends, on ps4, and real life friends who I talk to online. I don't really go out with anyone, I'm not dating anyone, I just cam and relax, cam and relax. I'm a social person at heart and I wonder if I'm wasting my younger years by being antisocial, and not finding someone to date. But then I see the money, and I'm content. Most of the time.

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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I so relate to this. I don't have or want many real life friends. It's just too time consuming. Being an older lady and newly single, I am now able to work all I want. That was not possible when I was married. I have a friend who wants me to go out but I really don't want to. That would mean taking time and energy away from making money. I do think it's important to have a life outside of work but I'm just not ready yet.
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I try to manage it all. It is hard. Friends, family, work. You have to compromise at a point. Not having friends time or family time just to work more is not a good thing in my opinion. Money comes and goes. People stay and some of them can make you feel really good.

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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I suggest a meetup group so you can do the activity together with new potential friends and it runs on a set schedule (ie. running group meets every 6pm at the park or a class at the gym / fitness studio). Some socializing with locals also interested in the activity as the central focus.

    Also suggest taking time for yourself ie, get a massage, cook a good meal, spend time in nature, develop a yoga practice, do something artistic or musical. The better you feel, it will show on others both on and off cam!
    Last edited by leiaswift; 10-09-2016 at 09:25 AM.

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    God/dess minniesoporno's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    It’s not about being a workaholic. It’s really about setting priorities in your life.

    We all have 24 hours in a day and 168 hours a week.

    So in those hours what are the most important things you need to get done, want to get done and have to get done and you are you going to spend that time with. Plus some sleep in there, housework, kids, pets, sick days, cooking etc.

    When you are working for yourself you have to do a lot of work today so you can eat tomorrow. Working for someone else there is a lot of I know If I work 8 hours I am going to get this pay check and while they are at work they are just doing the bare minimum.

    For anyone that has to produce results to see an income we have to set things different in our time management. NO not every friend out there is worth our time and energy when yes I could use it being with the boyfriend or sitting at home for the day watching tv shows and eating ice cream.

    I don’t feel bad if some friends think I work too much and I don’t feel bad if I decide to go out by myself and have a good time I called it "date night with myself."

    I am camming less and pushing more of my time in my internet marketing business so yes now my work day has become 2 to 4 hours. But it doesn’t mean because I’ve designed my work to be less then most people’s work day I want to run around and spend time with people.

    I am looking for meaning in where I spend my time and who I am spending it with if certain people don’t make that list that really isn’t my problem.
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    God/dess caramelcraze's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I've been selectively social for years. I only have a couple people in my life that i'd consider friends and it's a have dinner once a month or talk on skype every few weeks kind of relationship. Sure we'll text back and forth, but it's not scheduled and there's no pressure to respond immediately. They know I'm busy & if someone I'm trying to start a friendship with doesn't understand that they're kicked to the curb. I don't have time to stress over some needy person's feelings.


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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    My best friend is Money. Money never hurts my feelings or stabs me in the back. Money never disappoints me and is always consistent. I can rely on Money so I keep it in my life and I keep it close to me. Money listens to my problems AND solves them for me! I have lived during times of many "friends" and little money and can say that life is better with Money.

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    God/dess Mare's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I feel that trying to make friends as an adult is way too complicated. Plus where I'm at is different from most of my peers as in they're still doing the family with kids thing. I don't tell anyone what I do so when they ask me it's difficult. If they're close by and see me home they think I should have time for them. If they ask if I want to hang out and I tell them I'm busy they get pissed after awhile. " nobody;s busy all the time." is what I get. So I don't even bother anymore. It's not worth the drama or hurt feelings. Lonely is an understatement.
    I never get out. I don't have any fun. Work. Clean the house. try to sleep. repeat.

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    Featured Member Teddy_Bear's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    Social life? Yeah right I don't have any IRL friends because I just don't have the time to keep the friendships going anymore, too busy trying to secure my future. I'm glad I am not the only one who seems to have goals in mind and not people. I have some girlies I keep in contact with on social media and skype but meeting up and taking time out of my day just ain't gonna happen right now.

    I'm told I'm anti-social ALL THE TIME and these are people who know what I do for a living so there is no excuse, for every family occasion etc. I attend that is one day I haven't been able to log on. I find that I resent that probably more than is healthy nowadays.
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    Senior Member vaporeon's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    A lot of us are parents on top of camming, so yeah.... You're not alone at all!I already found it damn near impossible to make friends as a mom to begin with, but then I started camming and HA! You guys are my friends

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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    ^^ Yay for Forum Friends!!!

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    Senior Member xxxluv's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    When you work for yourself, and love what you do ,You put 3x sometimes up to 10x the work then when working for someone else.

    I have worked for myself in various fields for the past 9 years and its about balance for ME. I emphasize me because we all have different wants and needs. Some may not require the want or need of human interaction, some may. I am a very social person I do enjoy, outings with family and friends. I enjoy nice date nights , romantic getaways etc. I usually stay in contact with immediate family weekly and visit and attend gatherings monthly. My friends sometimes its daily sometimes monthly I always do my best to make birthdays, baby showers, weddings, a much needed gal pal day.
    For me quality time with family and friends and my significant other is important thankfully I have very supportive and understanding people in my life.
    Do I hear the occasional oh hey stranger or you been MIA every now and then sure???
    Do I fee bad No!! As stated I make the important gatherings.
    My job is in sales and salary is not guranteed I may have to put in 30-50 hours a week while the next few weeks may be half of that.

    But I also absolutely love to work, I enjoy making money, I enjoy planning on how to make money, market, reinvesting. I enjoy seeing money go into my bank account and know that If I want to take a few days off unexpectedly I usually can.

    Also, because not only do I cam I do it all. My closests friends and immediate family know what I do. I will definitely sext, or phone sex or edit videos during visits or outings depending on the situation. Or doing some marketing.

    I just got back from a vacation and while majority of the trip was limited work, my clips were scheduled to release daily. I did tons of paid sexting laying out on the beach. I did custom videos at triple my rate. All my recipets are saved for taxes. Sold exclusive snaps for vakay. So basically I got paid for vacation. I love my job!

    I work hard now so I dont have to later on down the line.
    One of my favorite quotes which states my life accurately since I was teen knowing that I wanted to work for myself and all the schooling and research I would do in the business, marketing etc fields.
    " Entrepreneurship is living a few years of your life like most people won’t so you can spend the rest of your life like most people cant.”
    I will soak up all these coins now so when Im good and ready to do whatever I want when I want, retire on my own terms, I can and finances well not be an issue.

    As long as you are happy and taking care of yourself including mentally, and live comfortably with your lifestyle thats what is important.
    Last edited by xxxluv; 10-10-2016 at 10:30 AM.

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    Veteran Member illuminaughty's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    Psssh girl,

    I forget my regrets when I check that balance.

    But on a serious note, i absolutely LOVE working all the time now.

    Friends are NOTHING but drama for me and I am OVER it. I prioritize myself and my needs now.

    At the end of the day I think as you get older, you relaize the importance of a marriage / relationship.

    I choose to focus on my relationship as my social circle. Thats all the human interraction I need. Some people may disagree but it works for me and I just like sharing myself with a man who adores me, respects me, and that I can have amazing sex / love making with. :^)

    When I have been in serious trouble, and needed financial housing help, or was in a true emergency it was NEVER my friends who helped me. It was always my family or my husband. So that's who I make time for, and no one else.

    I am 24, and I feel like when you're in your mid twenties is when friendship starts being a formality.

    I never know what to do with friends anyway. I dont like drinking or partying. So what is left after that?

    I enjoy shopping alone or online because it takes focus to find clothes and try them on.

    I would much rather experience dinner or lunch with my husband rather than a friend.

    I just don't see an upside anymore.
    Last edited by illuminaughty; 10-10-2016 at 11:47 AM.

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  39. #21
    Featured Member Violethollywood's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    Quote Originally Posted by illuminaughty View Post
    Psssh girl,

    I forget my regrets when I check that balance.

    But on a serious note, i absolutely LOVE working all the time now.

    Friends are NOTHING but drama for me and I am OVER it. I prioritize myself and my needs now.

    At the end of the day I think as you get older, you relaize the importance of a marriage / relationship.

    I choose to focus on my relationship as my social circle. Thats all the human interraction I need. Some people may disagree but it works for me and I just like sharing myself with a man who adores me, respects me, and that I can have amazing sex / love making with. :^)

    When I have been in serious trouble, and needed financial housing help, or was in a true emergency it was NEVER my friends who helped me. It was always my family or my husband. So that's who I make time for, and no one else.

    I am 24, and I feel like when you're in your mid twenties is when friendship starts being a formality.

    I never know what to do with friends anyway. I dont like drinking or partying. So what is left after that?

    I enjoy shopping alone or online because it takes focus to find clothes and try them on.

    I would much rather experience dinner or lunch with my husband rather than a friend.

    I just don't see an upside anymore.

    right . This exactly. I love money and i love nice things. Most "friends" just want to go out and get drunk. I don't drink much anymore so i never go hang out with friends anymore... I mean where are they when alcohol or drugs aren't present, for real. No thanks. I'd rather make money and have fun doing what i want by myself

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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I used to be like this... no time for relationships, family, friends, just had to rise and grind like I was on a military mission. I then took a nasty downturn in life and lost everything I had worked so hard for. I had everything I wanted (I grew up poor so at that time consumerism is what made me happy- felt accomplished). Luxury apartment filled with only the best, Jeep, convertible Benz, I SUPER hot, was involved in gymnastics bank full of cash to do whatever I wanted. I was lonely though, so if you have an SO, keep them close, you are lucky.

    Then one day...... it all came crashing in on me. That was 3 years ago and I am still trying to recover. I feel like I need balance and try to make time for others because when I feel I had no one to catch me. I still have that drive and I am very close to going back into that mode. I feel like I would have been back on top by now and then could have learned balance after getting my footing back. I was told I got my self esteem from being a workaholic, well so what!

    I raise my glass and cheers to you who are on that button relentlessly. Thanks for starting this thread, I want to be a workaholic again.
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  43. #23
    God/dess JaneBurgess's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    I used to be like this but in the end it just burns you out. All work all the time will make you hate this job faster than anything. Now I work just as much but start earlier in the day so I can go out and do stuff at night and on weekend.s
    Last edited by JaneBurgess; 10-11-2016 at 10:37 AM.

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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    To be honest with you, I think this is a personal thing and you should do what makes you happy.
    As far as I am concerned, I am pretty much like Jane; I love my friends and family and make sure I make the time for them.

    Starting earlier is always a good bet. You have more time to make your goal; and if it's slow and you have to stay on t reach your goal and bail ever now and then, the good friends understand. My friends all know I rely on myself to make money (even if most don't know what I do), and sometimes it means I will be a little late or big social gatherings and things.

    Hold on to the people who love and support you and let go of those you feel don't.

    Get away from the PC sometimes - it can do weird things, mess with your sleep and brains. After 9 days straight camming I love to get in to the wilderness for an epic walk with my mates and stop at a country pub at the end. It's nice just having my eyes focus on something far away too for a change haha!

    That said, I certainly wish I knew a few people like the ladies on here in real life. x

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    Senior Member Semyonovna's Avatar
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    Default Re: No time for friends, too busy working. Where my workaholics at?

    This thread <3 I don't have time for friends and I lost most of my friends as times go by. Those friends weren't true friends and our relationship was based on wrong stuff, so I'd rather be alone. I don't even like most of the people, Idk why, they just start to annoy me really easily with their basic minds. This job is isolating and I'm kind of grateful for it. I don't want to work with people, I hate dealing with stupid people but on cam it's a bit easier, I can block and ban them if they cross the line. Not telling people what I do for a living is also a big reason why I'm not that social. No one in my surroundings could understand why I do this and I don't want to explain myself to anyone. Only thing I wish for is having friendship with cam girls who understand all this.


    piece like a buddhist

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