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Thread: Providing Domme fetishes but not having a dominant personality

  1. #26
    God/dess caramelcraze's Avatar
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    Default Re: How did you learn to be a mistress/dominate?

    well my first adult bf ended up being a cuck so I learned a lot first hand. But there have been things over the years I haven't known or understood well and that's when i've chosen to read up on it with erotica & buy clips from top doms on the subject. If there's something someone wants NOW explain that you aren't well versed in it and let them guide you a bit. Some of my favorite customers have been those who introduce me to new kinks.

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  3. #27
    Veteran Member nattyfetish's Avatar
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    Default Re: How did you learn to be a mistress/dominate?

    With every member that I got, I learnt more and more. I looked at videos of certain fetishes; I researched on google. But one thing i avoided, was to tell them i am a beginner. It kind of made them go away. So i tried my best: asked what they are into (tried to google fast if i did not know what that was about) and just went ahead with it. Did I loose some members? Yes. But I would have lost them anyway (if i told them i was a beginner). On a positive note; sometimes I nailed it evan tough i had no idea of a certain fetish.

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  5. #28
    Veteran Member MissAliss515xx's Avatar
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    Default Re: How did you learn to be a mistress/dominate?

    I just had a guy yesterday and he guided me at first. When he started barking, I took the lead a little, by saying good boy, telling him I had him on a leash and I was his mistress. He liked it a lot. Another one wanted me to insult him while I was slapping dildo against my hand.

    But I think buying some videos, go learn and take notes is very good too. One day I'll be a good mistress !

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  7. #29
    Veteran Member Panthera's Avatar
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    Default Re: How did you learn to be a mistress/dominate?

    Quote Originally Posted by NitaBaby View Post
    Honestly, I'd pay for this info. Because the second I warn a guy that I'm new to something or haven't done xyz before, he leaves. Every time. With no one to practice on I can't even begin to learn based on feedback.
    Neverrr say you are a beginner. Just remember a time when you were really pissed off at a member...and pour it all out on him, like he would be that member! Haha. That's a great start, but pay attention to his reactions, because he will most likely guide you in the direction that he wants. In a Sub-Domme relationship the submissive is really the one leading the play, and every real domme should be aware and acceptant of that. If the subs would not be willing to sub, there would be no such fetish game. It would be something else that falls in a whole different category.

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  9. #30
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    Default Re: How did you learn to be a mistress/dominate?

    its nto really as simple as learning to "domme" cause that includes SO many fetishes. And so many types. Im a sub (market myself as a switch now and do mainly domme), so some of it I think "well what do I like?" but, femsub and malesub does have differences, most of it I learnt on the fly, during shows, I never said I was "new", just its not a fetish I'd tried but I'd loveee to learn to make him submit/hurt him/humiliate him like that.

    pornhub, erotica, buying content from SW who do that fetish, it's all great ways to learn. Find what you feel you do well and just do that (now I tend to do cuck - works cause I like being cucked irl so I get how it works - SPH, and worship), I do ~most~ femdom stuff, but Ill say no to CBT stuff now as its not for me

    basically - lots of ways to learn, personal experience (either domming or being a sub and using that), clips from SW, learning on the job, and erotica.


    dont wanna double post and dunno how to edit in a quote - but the above is totally right subs have most of the power, though, on cam I've noticed "subs" I get dont seem to care for how bdsm actually works, they want the fantasy more than the reality of how bdsm works

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  11. #31
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    Default Re: Providing Domme fetishes but not having a dominant personality

    Does anyone have some sources, like something to read? It's too slow to watch videos sometime. I found the SPH lines topic very useful. It would be great to have some of that lines for humiliation too.

  12. #32
    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Providing Domme fetishes but not having a dominant personality

    I have a very strong, dominating personality in real life but on cam I cannot dom for shit. I hate dom shows. Some girls are just natural at it.
    Quote Originally Posted by ~Carmen~ View Post
    I can see you being 90 and flipping your long hair, still teasing the boys.



  13. #33
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    Default Re: Providing Domme fetishes but not having a dominant personality

    I mainly do domination shows. Questions I always ask to new clients (and returning ones)

    1. to tell me any words/names/phrases that get them particularly excited so I can work it into our sessions
    2. any particular aspect they would like to focus on
    3. is there a specific scenario they've been playing over and over in their minds that they'd like to play out live
    4. what is it that excites them particularly about doing whatever it is they want to do

    the way I see it, even if I get 20 strapon shows, all 20 will be different because each and every custie has a particular thing or things that excite them about it




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  15. #34
    Featured Member DahliaSimone's Avatar
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    Default I dont fucking understand domme-ing.....

    So, i have realized that im never gonna get ahead if i dont just do some domme sessions....for some reason subs throw themselves at me and I spend half the day batting them away like Tippie Hedren in The Birds, because its not something im comfortable with. That being said, this job isnt about comfort, and if i want to get ahead at all im gonna have to suck it up and fake it....so today i thought id try to do some domme shows....3 subs hmu from different sites on Skype and all 3 ended up being wastes of time....my problem is, im not even sure how to do it, other than just be a straight up bitch as soon as i hear the words 'dominate me', which is, lets be honest, my usual state anyway. Am i supposed to be nice to them until they actually pay and we start to play? Am I supposed to just let the beast loose and be a bitch from the go (that doesnt seem to be working)? Im so confused, as its so outside my fuckin realm, i feel like a pretty big failure today that i didnt get one of those goddamn shows.....i dunno. Any tips? Any dommes who are actually subs in their day to day? More importantly, any trans girls who arent regular dommes who manage to make domme shows work for them? Any tips would be appreciated girls.

  16. #35
    Featured Member DahliaSimone's Avatar
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    Default Re: I dont fucking understand domme-ing.....

    To clarify: I can usually feel them out during the show, once its started and things are going....its moreso dealing with those wishy washy asses and trying to procure the actual payment. Its maddening.

  17. #36
    God/dess laurielegs's Avatar
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    Default Re: I dont fucking understand domme-ing.....

    Quote Originally Posted by DahliaSimone View Post
    To clarify: I can usually feel them out during the show, once its started and things are going....its moreso dealing with those wishy washy asses and trying to procure the actual payment. Its maddening.
    Yeah thats the tough part, getting them to pay. As far as the fetishes and such if you just roll with it and have them describe their fantasy they will actually train you. Don't worry if you're not a dominant personality 24/7 - these wankers are mostly just pretend subs! hahah they will try to boss you around to service whatever fetish they have. It's fantasy after all.

    I used to hate it but now all the different fetishes are what keep me from going insane with boredom. Over time you'll get a sense of who has the money and is ready and who isn't. Skype is a pain in the ass anyway because it's riddled with timewasters, but can be worth it though.

    I usually say something like "what sort of session are you into" to see if it's something I can offer, then once they say what it is, if I am interested I just paste in my payment link (even if they just added me from CMD or somewhere I still paste it in to prevent them playing dumb) and just say OK let me know when you have your session booked (meaning paid for)!

    I don't respond again till I see that $$$ in my CMD dashboard or whatever method I'm using. I used to spend so much time with booking but now I've got it down to about 5 to 10 mins at the most. Only about 1 out of 10 actually end up booking lately, so frustrating with the paypal stuff and amazon bullshit. I do a ton of blocking! Also remember to check the blacklist and instantly block them if they are on there - that will save you so much time.


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