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Thread: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

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    Default Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    edit.edit.
    Last edited by DamnJolene; 01-17-2017 at 03:45 AM.

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    Featured Member Violethollywood's Avatar
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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    So I just turned 27. Back when i was 23-25 I drank--ALOT . all social settings. whenever I got off work, I'd have 1-6 drinks a night, sometimes more and do it all over the next day. I binged drank every weekend. Then like mid way thru my 25th year, I started to wean myself off of it. the hangovers just kept getting worse and i was sick of them .
    I also smoked cigs ALOT . close to a pack a day, 2-3 packs if i was drinking that day. There was one instance where I had 30 beers and a few shots that day and still couldnt get drunk. That's when i knew I needed to slow down.

    I started smoking herb. Best thing I ever did. I don't drink anymore, if i do it's once every few months and even then it's 1 or 2 drinks tops. I just don't have a craving for it anymore. I also completely stopped smoking ciggarettes altogether and every now and then I crave one when Im really stressed out, like now, I crave one but I won't go buy a pack and wont bum one. I tell myself it'll pass.

    Part of the reason i smoked so much was that I had a lot of anxiety and alot of stress at the job i worked at at the time that and I always needed something in my mouth or hand haha, I started chewing gum when i started quitting smoking cigs. Helped a lot, not the niccorette kind, just regular gum.

    Your ability to smell every smell comes back, you start to notice people that do smoke cigs, their hair smells like it, their clothes, everything. I would be like omg is that how i smelled? Yeah. Gross.
    You start to look healthier in the face too. And breathing is better you dont get sick as often. That being said, my grandmother who just died last week smoked a shit ton and she lived until she was almost 90 (3 months away from her 90th)

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Kudos for quitting smoking. I have had very bad phases of drinking and as well. I mostly noticed I drank because I was bored and lonely. I got to a point of drinking almost a bottle of vodka by myself a night at home. Now, I drink maybe 2-3 drinks with friends or out a few times a week but I'm starting a detox so will be alcohol free for 40 days (even NYE!). If you need a sober buddy, PM me!!

    Quitting drinking is hard, even if you do not have a "problem". When you live in Western Society alcohol is everywhere!! Movies, Sporting events, restaurants, the nail salon, even my local whole foods has a bar in it!! The best advice I can offer is to occupy the time you used to drink in with some other activity- preferably a workout or other healthy activity (drinking green tea etc).
    XoXo Gia
    Danielle Fishell (the Dish): "If the Super-Star thing doesn't work out, Gia makes a great stripper name"

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    God/dess chanzep's Avatar
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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    I went thru thiss stage awell, drinking too much at work and partying heavy on days off, I would always be retracing my steps in the morning trying to remember!. In the end I had to seriously cut down, no drinking at home only out at clubs no taking drink to work with me only having 2 drinks from customers, lots of water at work too, also some clubs were eaiser not to drink in than others, smaller clubs with earlier shifts were easier than big V.I.P clubs.
    xoxo

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    I've been drinking too much at work this year & I've had to address the issue. Alcoholism runs in my family so I'm phobic of being a cliche drunk.

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Quote Originally Posted by DamnJolene View Post
    One of my friends told me that nothing good happens after 6 drinks (I'm thinking wine cups). I believe it's true. It's like there's a fine line between being a functioning drunk (knowing what you are saying and doing) and then being on the floor, forgetting what happen or what you did that night.
    Very true. Also drinking has a long term effect of worsening depression in depressive people- unfortunately it's the cause of suicide attempts & successful suicides. It's a huge problem in the Midwest.

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    I limit myself to drinking only at work or at a special dinner with my fiance. even at work I'll often ask for weak or virgin drinks to help. I grew up with parents who worked for a social service group who specialized in addiction. I have seen so many brokkkwn lives it hurts. it's not worth it for me

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    I'm a drinker. A functioning one but nonetheless. I always drink during sessions. Not cause I have too but cause it makes the time simply go faster. But do think I have to drink when I go out and party. Being sober at a nightclub? Ugh, no.

    At home I will sometimes get carried away but I reason that at least the worst I do is order food. I won't be stupid enough to leave the house or anything. I get drunk by my lonesome, eat then fall asleep.

    Its certainly so ingrained in our culture. And I never want to reach the point where I am indeed an alcoholic and can never drink again..

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Me and my best friend are similar ... she is a little worse than me, in the fact that her tolerance is higher for longer, then suddenly she hits the wall and ends up in insane situations or gets aggressive (never with other females only with guys ... not that that's any better I guess)

    We both make ourselves a glass of wine in the early evening, and can easily just keep drinking til we pass out.

    She does it to cope since coming out of federal and I do it to cope with a lot of sex work. We are both decent human beings who care for each other etc and other people but this drinking thing gets us into a world of trouble.

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Find an AA meeting near you and go.

    Go every day.

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking


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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Hello!

    If you are drinking that much per day, going cold turkey could be dangerous. My other job is being an RN and I see alcohol withdrawal in a lot of my paitents. Alcohol withdrawal can kill you... so if you quit and are getting the shakes, headaches, anxiety, irritability, light sensitivity, hallucinations... you will likely need medical assistance with quitting drinking. You could get seizures and die. It's no joke, and 2-3 bottles of wine a night most definitely puts you in the category of someone I would worry about for alcohol withdrawal. If you are serious about this, maybe an inpatient center is not a bad idea.

    I have other substance issues and never cared for AA but SMART recovery is awesome; based in cognitive behavioral therapy, teaches you skills around dealing with triggers, cravings, etc. They have a message board and forum, like here. They have meetings all over, and you can do them instead of AA. Or in addition to AA if you like. They are more research based and focus on empowering you with skills to make better choices, rather than AA's whole powerles-ness thing, which I do not find helpful.

    Wishing you the best!!

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    I hope I'm not being out of line when I say that if you were sleeping behind a dumpster on an icy night or under a bridge, you are putting yourself at serious risk. You've been lucky so far, but something will happen soon where everything won't just turn out all right.

    The quantities you're drinking are way more than you need for a high (1-3 drinks doubles dopamine), and way more than most people could drink and still function.

    Is there maybe something else that is making you unhappy?
    Where Am I? Missing NYC

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    I agree with replacing alcohol with weed. It's much better for you and still puts a smile on my face at work

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    That post about alcohol withdrawal is scary as shit but I wonder how much does one really have to drink? I can DRINK a lot without being sloppy drunk but I am also on my sixth day sober (of 30) and haven't had any withdrawal symptoms at all... does one need to keep themselves drunk for months on end or something?
    XoXo Gia
    Danielle Fishell (the Dish): "If the Super-Star thing doesn't work out, Gia makes a great stripper name"

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Seizures usually come about the third day.

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Gia, it's amount per session AND consecutive days. Drinking high amounts every day for a month, for example. Won't happen with sporadic, occasional binge drinking. This website helped me learn more: http://hams.cc/odds/
    Talks about amount and time frame related to risk of alcohol withdrawal.

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    That's so crazy. I guess because I was drinking a lot and a "heavy social drinker" (though some days drinking by myself) but not actually alcohol dependant. My Mom was (alcoholic) and I remember in all the times my sister and I tried to get her to quit some weird stuff happened. I brought her to the airport once and she had to write a check for me for something or other (I was like 19 at the time) and she couldn't make out a check because her hands were shaking so bad. I know she was "sober" because it was early in the morning and I dumped her alcohol the night before after it was too late to buy any.

    Snuffleufflegrass- What you were saying about the alcoholism in your family is my family too. My Mom eventually died due to complications with her alcoholism and her brother died last summer in the same way (but drugs 1st alcohol 2nd). It's kind of weird because I am the only one between my Mom and my 2 sisters who didn't have a kid in my teens (oldest sister made it to 19 but Mom and lil sis were 16). I used to drink with wild abandon- I would go out with my friends and party til I blacked out all the time. I caught a lot of shit because none of them understood; I did ok from like 21 to 26 or so and then started drinking heavily again. After a few family members and some friends expressed concern I just changed my mindset and I changed my habits. What scares me is my older sister- she was so worried about "becoming like Mom" she hardly drink at all until maybe 30 or 31- she would have like 4 to 5 drinks per month. Now, she drinks in secret or lies about it but I can tell. She is also really depressed, it is a recipe for disaster but if she is lying to herself there is nothing I can do.

    Don't mean to turn this into the Gia Chronicles. Just trying to share in case it helps somebody else; even if to feel they are not alone.

    I truly hope the OP and anyone else here that needs help seeks it out. It is a tough industry for people with dependency problems because it is not only acceptable but sometimes expected (which is sick as fuck). I worked with a girl that died of liver failure at like 35 or 36 years old before. She was so pretty and it was very sad; one of the worst funerals I have ever been to.

    Drinking really can and will fuck up your life and your health if you let it.
    XoXo Gia
    Danielle Fishell (the Dish): "If the Super-Star thing doesn't work out, Gia makes a great stripper name"

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Gia, if I knew someone with a similar struggle, is there anything you can say or do that makes a difference?

    For example, I worked for a while as a volunteer at a crisis center (my gf at the time was on staff) and they used to tell me over and over, do not be protective of or patronizing to the women in any way; they need to establish control in their own lives. I felt that personally in some cases a shoulder to cry on would have helped but all the training says no. This was the late 90s it could be different today.

    Maybe my first impulses maybe are wrong in this case too.
    Where Am I? Missing NYC

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Honestly, I can not give you any advice. With my mother; my sister and I tried in no particular order: talking to her, ignoring her, yelling at her, my sister would not let her see my nephew for a long time, we tried smothering her (I moved in with her at one point and at one point she was living with my sister); blocking her out completely, getting her own siblings (particularly my Uncle) to intervene, I had a good friend's father who was an AA sponsor come to my house (when I still lived with my Mom) to try and talk to her, I drove her to rehab personally at least 2 times but it could have been more, took her to church, what else?... I moved in with my boyfriend for a little bit in the 10th grade...

    Nothing worked. She stopped drinking a few times for maybe a few weeks at most at a time; I honestly think this is after they diagnosed her with liver disease. She just did not want to stop drinking. I remember long after I had moved to Fla, I went home for a visit and my mother was in the hospital. My best friend drove me to visit her and when we left the room my best friend was crying hysterically.

    When we were in the hospital and she was dying I remember actually being angry with her. My nephew (who was maybe 16 or 17 at the time) was crying really badly and heaving his chest (he's a pretty big boy) and all I could think of was how could she do this to him? Why was drinking more important than watching him grow up?

    It's fucked up because I know a lot of people who lost family members the same way. Snuffleufflegrass was mentioning earlier that alcoholism is bad in the Mid-West and it is in the North East too. I don't really know that many people here in So Fla that have these kinds of issues. I did have a friend that got bad with drugs and I stopped talking to her for a bit but she is good now so I'm ready to reconnect. I didn't have the patience for dealing with an addict again.

    Anyway Bahuba, to answer your question unless you are a certified addiction counselor there is very little you can say to someone. They have to want to get help or change their lives. I think this is like one of the first 12 steps or something.

    You can tell them that you are there for them and you will support them if they decide they want to get help.
    Last edited by Gia2608; 12-21-2016 at 06:27 PM.
    XoXo Gia
    Danielle Fishell (the Dish): "If the Super-Star thing doesn't work out, Gia makes a great stripper name"

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    I
    Quote Originally Posted by Gia2608 View Post
    Honestly, I can not give you any advice. With my mother; my sister and I tried in no particular order: talking to her, ignoring her, yelling at her, my sister would not let her see my nephew for a long time, we tried smothering her (I moved in with her at one point and at one point she was living with my sister); blocking her out completely, getting her own siblings (particularly my Uncle) to intervene, I had a good friend's father who was an AA sponsor come to my house (when I still lived with my Mom) to try and talk to her, I drove her to rehab personally at least 2 times but it could have been more, took her to church, what else?... I moved in with my boyfriend for a little bit in the 10th grade...

    Nothing worked. She stopped drinking a few times for maybe a few weeks at most at a time; I honestly think this is after they diagnosed her with liver disease. She just did not want to stop drinking. I remember long after I had moved to Fla, I went home for a visit and my mother was in the hospital. My best friend drove me to visit her and when we left the room my best friend was crying hysterically.

    When we were in the hospital and she was dying I remember actually being angry with her. My nephew (who was maybe 16 or 17 at the time) was crying really badly and heaving his chest (he's a pretty big boy) and all I could think of was how could she do this to him? Why was drinking more important than watching him grow up?

    It's fucked up because I know a lot of people who lost family members the same way. Snuffleufflegrass was mentioning earlier that alcoholism is bad in the Mid-West and it is in the North East too. I don't really know that many people here in So Fla that have these kinds of issues. I did have a friend that got bad with drugs and I stopped talking to her for a bit but she is good now so I'm ready to reconnect. I didn't have the patience for dealing with an addict again.

    Anyway Bahuba, to answer your question unless you are a certified addiction counselor there is very little you can say to someone. They have to want to get help or change their lives. I think this is like one of the first 12 steps or something.

    You can tell them that you are there for them and you will support them if they decide they want to get help.
    Thanks very much for this answer. In my amateur view, I agree with you that addictions are often similar. I even know a guy I think is a hoarder, and you certainly can't reason with him. From what you're saying, people with addictions are hiding it from themselves and to reach them you have to break that fiction, which you can't do without training.

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Ok falling asleep behind a dumpster is so sooo dangerous not only w being attacked while you're unconscious but with freezing to death. It happens a lot near me. Alcohol lowers your body temp, you think you don't feel the cold as much, you pass out, you die in your sleep.
    If you're drinking that much it goes well beyond social drinking or having a few too many w the girls..that's a serious addiction and a way of coping and blocking out something. I'm not judging you, addict here too, just not with alcohol.
    The bad thing w alcohol addiction or food addiction or even smoking is at its ingrained social lubricant in our society and not stigmatized as much. So it can be very hard to avoid temptation when it's a basic way of socializing in our culture.
    you're going to have to avoid situations with drinking for awhile and stop hanging w people who encourage it. It can be hard but it's necessary at least for awhile. Get thee to a support group too!
    Good luck you seem very sweet so I wish you the best !

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    Most people get sober in treatment facilities now. There are few old time drunks with experience at sobering people up. This is the chapter on how they were advised to go about it.

    http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/en_bigbook_chapt7.pdf

    It would be a good idea to read the whole book. You may recognize yourself in the personal stories.

    http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoholics-anonymous

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    I think it would be healthy for you to introspect about why you drink and what you're feeling inside when you feel the urge to drink. Then you must heal those underlying wounds. I recommend seeing a licensed psychologist who specializes in addiction recovery.

    I also recommend taking a milk thistle supplement. Milk thistle helps to detoxify the liver.

    Good luck xoxo

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    Default Re: Need to get myself right; Need to quit drinking

    You need to go to a treatment facility. Falling asleep behind dumpsters and under bridges is beyond dangerous and is very much in the "addict" category.

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