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Thread: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

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    Default Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Hello all, this is my first post and I'm hoping that I can get some advice! I've been in the industry for over a year so since July 2015, when I first started I use to make so much money, then after I couldn't take the rejection well and started doing lines to get over my shyness, it's become a bad habit as everytime I go to work I have to do lines to not be shy, n it is overwhelming, I feel horrible after and have lost so much weight. I also drink too and spend more money than I make on drugs a usually 150-200 a night, I tried to quit but everytime the crowd picks up it is really hard, it helps me open up and talk to customers ... I've seen girls that get rejected by 10 guys and keep doing their rounds. I'm 26 and obviously want to get out the game in the next 2-3 years but I am soooo shy sometimes I go home with nothin! How do I get over my shyness it's been over a year !!!

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Try bartending or waitressing. Not worth sacrificing your health over a job.

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Sounds like this job is not for you. You'd be a lot better off at a 9-5 job where you are not exposed to drugs, and you can take home a steady paycheck.

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Yeh don't kill yourself over some casual work - go get a 9-5 and be able to deal with people on a more normal basis. Sorry you're going through this - I drink for the same reason and I can tell you, totally not worth it xo

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    I drink for the same reason at work. Kinda heavily. I don't like rejection and still don't approach customers like I should. When I work urban clubs.... Well, y'all know the deal. Packed with people (and rude females), nightclub atmosphere, aggressive guys, etc. So I drink to be the happy, fun, sexy Party Girl. It took me about a two years to get comfortable, but I am still nowhere near a hustler.

    I'd say if you can get off the coke, just drink and try to get in your zone that way. But, honestly, you seem to have a bit of an addictive personality (ex. Spending $200 a night on drugs). Have a hard talk with yourself and if you can't work somewhat clean, you may want to find another occupation. Maybe bartend.
    "I'm trying to get Boston George and Diego money/And stack it all up like Lego money....."

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    This isn't for everyone,if you are that dependent on drugs....i'd get out the game before you end up using something even stronger.

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Agree with everyone here. I have seen the same piece of advice here about how if you "need" substances to be able to handle this job then it is not for you. I am not going to beat a dead horse because I am sure you know that by now. Unless you are in Canada $200.00 worth of coke is a lot of coke. I fear that you doing that several days a week even if you were to walk away from dancing all together you still need help with the drug problem.

    They are 2 seperate issues that you are combining into one situation to justify your actions to yourself.

    1. You are not outgoing enough to be successful as a stripper and 2. You have a pretty serious drug problem.

    While I agree with the sentiment that dancing and doing drugs or drinking your face off do not mix; if you think you are strong willed enough to change you might be able to dance still. You don't necessarily need to "change your personality" but you will need to act a little better. Your "stripper persona" does not need to be the same person as who you are at home. Maybe read some books or through the threads here. If you can pull that off and be at the club without doing drugs you may want to give it a month or so before quitting all together.

    However, I think due to the fact you were complaining about not making any money.... maybe it is not for you?
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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Kimberly_416 View Post
    Hello all, this is my first post and I'm hoping that I can get some advice! I've been in the industry for over a year so since July 2015, when I first started I use to make so much money, then after I couldn't take the rejection well and started doing lines to get over my shyness, it's become a bad habit as everytime I go to work I have to do lines to not be shy, n it is overwhelming, I feel horrible after and have lost so much weight. I also drink too and spend more money than I make on drugs a usually 150-200 a night, I tried to quit but everytime the crowd picks up it is really hard, it helps me open up and talk to customers ... I've seen girls that get rejected by 10 guys and keep doing their rounds. I'm 26 and obviously want to get out the game in the next 2-3 years but I am soooo shy sometimes I go home with nothin! How do I get over my shyness it's been over a year !!!
    I agree with the girls suggesting a different job. For substance abuse, often is best to completely remove yourself from the environment that condones it. However, if you REALLY wanna stick this out there's some things you could give a shot.

    Somewhere there's a thread on here about stripping as an introvert. Girls just discussing it but also giving tips on how they handle it. Also, multiple threads on dealing with rejection. Personally, I am an introvert, somewhat shy and not outgoing unless I know the people. Some days are worse than others. One of my favorite tips given was to give yourself a set number of people to approach. Like say tell yourself you'll approach 3 customers. If all 3 reject you, go take a quick break and relieve yourself of the pressure. Something that also helps me is think about nights that I've made tons of money. It puts me in a positive mood. As far as rejection, this works with my personality, I have somewhat of a "fuck them, they don't know me, their loss" attitude. Also, look back and think about what was different between when you first started and were making a lot of money and now.

    Like another girl mentioned, IDK where you're at but $150-200 in coke a night is a lot for one girl in one night in most places. Delete your coke dealers number. Don't work in a club where drugs are especially rampant. Avoid girls you know use. The least temptation the better. When it comes to liquor, could you discuss a drink limit with your bartenders? I have a drink limit that was set by me, because I drive myself.

    At the end of the day, dancing may just not be for you. Nothing wrong with that. Over the years I've seen too many girls taken over by drugs/liquor. Your health is not worth the money.

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    First I'd like to say I feel for you.I'm new to dancing & I'm what would be considered shy & I have issues approaching guys also.I take a shot to loosen up in the beginning of my shift but drink nothing but water after I have a little more self control.You have to look at it more like mind over matter type of thing, that's what I've been doing.Stop thinking about rejection before you even give yourself a chance to close the sale & make the money.

    In the club is where it's good to have an alter ego that's the exact opposite of who you are in real life. Be positive, think positive, it'll change things.If you used to make so much money that means you STILL can.Cut the drugs & stop thinking negatively before you even give yourself a chance.Rejection is apart of this job even the most experienced hustlers & most beautiful dancers have their days too.You are not alone, it doesn't just happen to you.Sending virtual hugs, positive vibes & positive aura

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Okay, i completely relate to this.. I've been dancing for two years now and HAVE to drink alcohol every time I go along with a quarter of a xanax (which is not a lot). I'm so shy as well. I have social anxiety and find it beyond impossible to make money when i'm not a little buzzed. I've definitely came along way I must say. I used to get straight up drunk but now I take about two or three shots and i'm okay. I guess after a while I became more desensitized but the anxiety is most definitely still there. If you have to do more than alcohol then I would try to maybe get a prescription for an anxiety medication. Others might not agree with the "more drugs" answer but having a prescription to a calming medicine like xanax has helped me wonders and I can still make money.

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by alyssanna View Post
    Okay, i completely relate to this.. I've been dancing for two years now and HAVE to drink alcohol every time I go along with a quarter of a xanax (which is not a lot). I'm so shy as well. I have social anxiety and find it beyond impossible to make money when i'm not a little buzzed. I've definitely came along way I must say. I used to get straight up drunk but now I take about two or three shots and i'm okay. I guess after a while I became more desensitized but the anxiety is most definitely still there. If you have to do more than alcohol then I would try to maybe get a prescription for an anxiety medication. Others might not agree with the "more drugs" answer but having a prescription to a calming medicine like xanax has helped me wonders and I can still make money.
    It's not ideal but if this is how you need to make money and what it takes right now to pay the bills and other alternatives won't cut it ... finding an alternative might be the answer ... xanax will certainly work if needed xo

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    I can feel ya.

    I'm a total introvert and approaching strange men, entertaining them, and convincing them to spend money with me was nerve wracking especially if I could see other girls hustling laps around me.

    I used to drink liquor every shift to help me loosen up but this caused me to use it as a crutch and caused me to develop a dependence on alcohol. Not good. My liver and skin was pissed at me. I know how challenging it is to quit something cold turkey so try cutting back first then quitting. Reward yourself and take care of yourself.

    Yes liquor is legal if you're over 21 and so is xanax but whatever you do don't swap one addiction for another. They're all unhealthy. Xanax is highly addictive and easy to build a tolerance to so be careful using these other legal substances.

    Often times it's mind over matter. Meditate, do hypnosis, or try other alternatives that will help you relax and are better for your health. Learn some sales skills, communication skills, and seduction skills and that will help you make more money.

    And please cut back so you can save some money. Last thing you want to be doing is chasing money so you can then chase the dragon so to speak and be on this endless rat wheel with nothing to show for it.
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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Oh girl..now that you've started , you're going to have to struggle to quit AND relearn how to hustle and interact w customers. That's a tall order. I agree I'd take a break from stripping.
    If you can't do this job without drinking or drugging , it's just not for you and there's nothing wrong w that!! It's not worth your physical and mental health..and all the money you're spending on that shit, possible jail time getting busted, etc.

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Thank you, for the advice, it's nice to know there's support on this forum! As others posted I know that I can quit stripping or it isn't for me and obviously I wouldn't be strippin if I did not have too if I was able to just get a regular job I would not turn to strippin, yes it is hard without the drugs and I am used to the club that I first worked in and I know that club always triggers me since its so easy accessible, since this post I have went out of my town to work in other places without knowing anyone who can provide me with the drugs and I've made money I haven't made in a while also without gettin shit face drunk! So I guess there is hope! Thank you for your post

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    I can feel ya.

    I'm a total introvert and approaching strange men, entertaining them, and convincing them to spend money with me was nerve wracking especially if I could see other girls hustling laps around me.

    I used to drink liquor every shift to help me loosen up but this caused me to use it as a crutch and caused me to develop a dependence on alcohol. Not good. My liver and skin was pissed at me. I know how challenging it is to quit something cold turkey so try cutting back first then quitting. Reward yourself and take care of yourself.

    Yes liquor is legal if you're over 21 and so is xanax but whatever you do don't swap one addiction for another. They're all unhealthy. Xanax is highly addictive and easy to build a tolerance to so be careful using these other legal substances.

    Often times it's mind over matter. Meditate, do hypnosis, or try other alternatives that will help you relax and are better for your health. Learn some sales skills, communication skills, and seduction skills and that will help you make more money.

    And please cut back so you can save some money. Last thing you want to be doing is chasing money so you can then chase the dragon so to speak and be on this endless rat wheel with nothing to show for it.
    I'm still gettin use to how to reply lol my post below was in reply to this post!

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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Good job on changing clubs & staying sober!

    There was a girl the other night at my club who is known for being shitfaced, for the same reason. She's probably 35+, so who knows how long she's had to be drunk to work... Anyway, her tactic was to work as long as she could sober, but when she started getting an urge for a drink, she went home. I thought that was very smart.

    Maybe wean yourself off in a similar fashion. The first week, work for 3 hours and then if you're getting anxious or feeling the urge to drink, head out. For the next week, when you get the urge, hustle just one more customer and then go home. Etc etc until you can work through it and hopefully eventually not feel like you need to at all.
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    Default Re: Shy and want to stop turning to drugs!! Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Kimberly_416 View Post
    Hello all, this is my first post and I'm hoping that I can get some advice! I've been in the industry for over a year so since July 2015, when I first started I use to make so much money, then after I couldn't take the rejection well and started doing lines to get over my shyness, it's become a bad habit as everytime I go to work I have to do lines to not be shy, n it is overwhelming, I feel horrible after and have lost so much weight. I also drink too and spend more money than I make on drugs a usually 150-200 a night, I tried to quit but everytime the crowd picks up it is really hard, it helps me open up and talk to customers ... I've seen girls that get rejected by 10 guys and keep doing their rounds. I'm 26 and obviously want to get out the game in the next 2-3 years but I am soooo shy sometimes I go home with nothin! How do I get over my shyness it's been over a year !!!

    You don't need to turn to drugs for this!

    I'm the shyest person ever. I have a difficult time approaching customers. I don't drink or smoke. I've never been to a club before I started stripping. However, I still make great money. You just need to have confidence I guess. And if you're attractive enough, it shouldn't be hard to sell dances even if you're shy.

    If you have to depend on drugs, then isn't that a waste of money just to make 150-200 a night (and you're spending some of that on drugs)? I mean, you can probably make that by bartending and not depend on drugs. I think it isn't worth the trade off.

    Edit: Just read that you're sober now. Good job

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