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Thread: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

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    Veteran Member ShaylaSkates's Avatar
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    Default I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Exactly what it sounds like. I got hired at a local dungeon, and start tomorrow morning. I have a bit of experience with fetish (mostly ABDL kind of stuff, but also shibari technique and some light bondage done with boyfriends), but I'm less concerned about the actual work than I am about my coworkers. Do I get friendly with them or will it look like I'm trying too hard? Do I ask questions concerning technique/the dungeon in general to management or to the other Dommes? I was thinking about volunteering to help with cleanup after sessions to be helpful, but will I just look like a weasel? I genuinely want to learn everything there is to know, and I genuinely want to be friends with my coworkers. Does anyone have experience with this? There's only 4 girls on shift when I start on Saturday, one is also new (but not quite as new as me), I just have no idea what to do.
    Savannah > Atlanta > Dallas > Austin > New York

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    Senior Member Shannon.'s Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    I don't have any dungeon experience. I'm usually friendly but somewhat aloof in sexwork settings. The way you describe it seems little too ingratiating for my style, which doesn't usually garner a whole lot of respect, let alone friendship. Help clean if you have extra time but don't go out of your way. No body likes a brown-noser.

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    Senior Member xStitchesx's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    I started off as a submissive in a dungeon before moving to a new place and now I work independent/online.

    I've been very lucky in that the dungeon I was at was very friendly. There were of course a lot of girls coming and going as to be expected in the sex industry. But the core group was welcoming and friendly.

    I wouldn't go out of my way either, but I did show interest and stay friendly but not nosey or too eager. Some people choose to keep their distance in this industry for a variety of reasons. Some people don't open up to the new girls because of high turnover. Just do your job and do it well. Ask questions if you want to learn. Because I started as a sub and didn't have any experience with technical things, I learned a lot by asking the Dominas to demonstrate on me or to watch when they were training switches.

    I think consistency and doing a good job will show that you're committed.

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    Veteran Member ShaylaSkates's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Thanks ladies! My first shift went well, one girl showed me the ropes (she kind of volunteered), others were aloof, but I didn't realize there was SUCH a high turnover. I guess I'm super jaded from dancing for so long, but nothing that happened today surprised me (except there was a girl who could fart on command, which amazed me), I guess most other girls are skeeved out by some of the stuff that goes on. But apparently most girls last less than one month which is insane. I'm pretty determined to learn as much as I can, I'm excited for my next shift!
    Savannah > Atlanta > Dallas > Austin > New York

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    Senior Member xStitchesx's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Keep at it! I miss working at a dungeon. Although some of the girls there are there more for money than kink, it nice to be around the ones that are the real deal. It was also nice to be around some truly submissive women and see things from their pov. Youre making me miss LA so bad rn now lol!

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    Veteran Member ShaylaSkates's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Small update, but there's not a lot of info on these boards about dominatrix work, so I thought I might post. Work at the dungeon is going well. I've learned a LOT about sex work and in the almost 3 weeks I've worked there, I learned that there's nothing to be afraid of. Apparently things that are super popular are golden showers (I learned that I fucking love doing them), and sub sessions are common. The girls that work there are aloof (which is to be expected) but once you show them you're super serious about working and learning, they'll come around. Offering to help clean rooms was actually really helpful to me, I got to get some one on one time with different Dommes and was able to ask questions without looking stupid, I also got to learn more about the different rooms in our dungeon and how some of the different things/equipment worked. I really like my coworkers and every day is something new/different. SUPER STOKED about these next few weeks, I'm super looking forward to learning more and perfecting my craft.
    Savannah > Atlanta > Dallas > Austin > New York

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    God/dess arielbriel's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    That's super interesting! How is the pay compared to dancing? The hours? Are you doing both?

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    Veteran Member ShaylaSkates's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Quote Originally Posted by arielbriel View Post
    That's super interesting! How is the pay compared to dancing? The hours? Are you doing both?
    The hours are VASTLY better, 10:30-6:30, or 5:30-1:30 (and only 6 hour shifts on the weekends!), and most of that is sitting around in the dressing room waiting for someone to come in and session. You don't make as much money in the beginning (regulars are a MUST, according to the girls who have been there longer), but I like it better because I don't have to talk to time wasters, I don't have to be on the floor, I don't have to go on stage 100 times a day. The money potential is, on average, less than dancing (I will probably never have a $1k+ shift here), but there are no house fees, no tip out, no credit card cuts. Dommes also have a much longer 'shelf life', because while there is a demand for the super young girls, many clients who are into super intense sessions prefer older, experienced women.

    Right now, I am doing both, about to switch clubs until the money picks up more at the dungeon, but in just two weeks I already have two regulars, and I'm there just 3 days per week. Going from dancing 5 days a week to just 2-3 is SO MUCH LESS STRESS. I had serious burnout and now I feel like the few days I put in at the club are so much easier than they were previously. Who knew that kicking people in the nuts was so therapeutic?
    Savannah > Atlanta > Dallas > Austin > New York

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    God/dess chanzep's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    sounds really cool, I always wondered about this, I use to dance with a girl who did this back in London, I did foot fetish partys and always wondered about this work. Im glad its going well for you.
    xoxo

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    Senior Member xStitchesx's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Yeah glad to hear it's going well too! Looks like you found a good match.

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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Are you working in LA or NYC? Also, what do you think is the average age? I'm in my early thirties, still dancing but ppl are now calling me mam or lady on a regular basis, so am starting to feel a bit uncertain about my longevity in the sex biz. But otherwise, even with crap money dancing in LA relative to other places, the sex business is still much better earnings relative to most jobs in the restaurant business, or just any job for that matter, if you have "soft" degrees/credentials like I do.

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    Veteran Member ShaylaSkates's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    The average age at my dungeon skews younger, but we also hire anyone willing to learn. The other place has women that are older, but most are still between 25-30. We have a few older women on staff, but those ladies are booked almost nonstop, they've been in the business for years and have a whole slew of regulars. They're super bad bitches.
    Savannah > Atlanta > Dallas > Austin > New York

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    Senior Member xStitchesx's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Quote Originally Posted by ZeroSugarMonster View Post
    Are you working in LA or NYC? Also, what do you think is the average age? I'm in my early thirties, still dancing but ppl are now calling me mam or lady on a regular basis, so am starting to feel a bit uncertain about my longevity in the sex biz. But otherwise, even with crap money dancing in LA relative to other places, the sex business is still much better earnings relative to most jobs in the restaurant business, or just any job for that matter, if you have "soft" degrees/credentials like I do.
    I started out as a sub in an LA dungeon. They were a lot of younger girls starting out as subs, but most of the Dominas were at least 30. The dungeon I was at was pretty old school and wouldn't let you start as a switch or Domina unless you had a lot of pro experience. There are a few dungeons out there that will hire you as a Domina and train you straight away. But I didn't have any luck with those.

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    Veteran Member ShaylaSkates's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Quote Originally Posted by xStitchesx View Post
    I started out as a sub in an LA dungeon. They were a lot of younger girls starting out as subs, but most of the Dominas were at least 30. The dungeon I was at was pretty old school and wouldn't let you start as a switch or Domina unless you had a lot of pro experience. There are a few dungeons out there that will hire you as a Domina and train you straight away. But I didn't have any luck with those.
    Talking to some other girls, it seems LA is a whole different ballgame, three other women I've spoken to said they all started out as subs/switches out there. We have some house girls that will sub, but there really isn't enough demand for that, IMO, in our area. In the 20 or so shifts I've worked, there's been maybe 4 requests for sub sessions? Is there that big of a demand for sub sessions out there? That seems like a really great way to learn to be a better Domme, but I would be terrified of boundary-crossers (i did one sub session here that was tickling, and it was easy, but it was also incredibly tame), and hard sub sessions are definitely NOT something I'm interested in doing, ever. How am I supposed to go on stage with a black and blue behind? Hahahahahahahaha.
    Savannah > Atlanta > Dallas > Austin > New York

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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Its obvious why dommes are in high demand. Male Dom and female sub is exceedingly common in the real world (I find it more and more than vanilla), while the inverse is exceedingly rare. In almost every case the red line is to not bruise the money maker.

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    Senior Member xStitchesx's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Quote Originally Posted by ShaylaSkates View Post
    Talking to some other girls, it seems LA is a whole different ballgame, three other women I've spoken to said they all started out as subs/switches out there. We have some house girls that will sub, but there really isn't enough demand for that, IMO, in our area. In the 20 or so shifts I've worked, there's been maybe 4 requests for sub sessions? Is there that big of a demand for sub sessions out there? That seems like a really great way to learn to be a better Domme, but I would be terrified of boundary-crossers (i did one sub session here that was tickling, and it was easy, but it was also incredibly tame), and hard sub sessions are definitely NOT something I'm interested in doing, ever. How am I supposed to go on stage with a black and blue behind? Hahahahahahahaha.
    Yeah, I would only sub at a dungeon I trusted and felt safe in! I had zero desire to do independent submissive work. The place I worked at has been around something like 30+ years! It was a pleasure to work there. And there was a pretty big demand for submissive girls. In fact, when the switches were promoted to Dominas, they joked about it being the only promotion with a pay cut.
    It costs more for a heavy session and the guys I encountered were mostly good about not pushing your boundaries. Most of em anyway.

    I was also stripping at the same time as working in the dungeon! It wasn't a big deal for me because 1) I'm dark skinned so bruises don't show up very well on me and our club had red lights, 2)I only seem to get bruises from falling off the pole- never got a bruise from BDSM. My ass can take a beating lol.
    And 3) I got a rush of sessions in the beginning because I was the 'new' girl and all the regs were curious. I was also the only black girl. Then more new girls came and we got another black girl who was a switch, I think. Guys stopped seeing me. Not only did they want to try the new girls, but they quickly figured out I was only submissive because I had to be. You had to be a sub for like 6 months or something before you could train to be a switch.

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    Featured Member LaurenAus's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Hey guys I also live in LA. I dabbled in the adult world a few years ago and then stopped to pursue a masters and enter the healthcare field. I have a lot of loans, la is expensive, and frankly after taxes and rent and loan payments it's depressing how working my ass off for a masters isn't really what it's cracked up to be in terms of income. There's a part of me that craves a side gig at a dungeon for extra money. I'm not very experienced though and don't wanna advertise pictures on dungeon sites..just wondering if others are in my position and domming on the side and if there's any legal implications (like are you expected to do borderline illegal activity like penetration for money when working in a dungeon). Thank you
    Quote Originally Posted by SweetJulia View Post
    everyone I've fucked who was awful in bed should be forced to have sex with each other so they can all, collectively, figure out why I never called them back.

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    Nothing makes me feel like less of an adult than walking into several other people's apartments and realizing we all own the exact same lamp from K-mart.

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    Senior Member Grace108's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    What to you type to find out about dungeons?

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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Join fetlife.com and via it's groups learn all you want to know (and then some).

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    Senior Member xStitchesx's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Yes, join fetlife to learn more. Also, be aware that Los Angeles is heavily saturated with pro Dommes, switches and submissives. This doesn't mean you won't make any money, but you will have to compete for it. Sex work in LA is generally tough financially because of so much competition, the guys in LA are entitled as fuck, and cost of living is high. I wouldn't recommend getting into this unless you had an actual interest in BDSM. Camming would be a better option, and if you want to be anonymous, try Nite flirt or something similar. You can do BDSM there as well

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    Senior Member Grace108's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    Thanks am no in LA ... and am mainly curious

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    Veteran Member ShaylaSkates's Avatar
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    Default Re: I got hired at a dungeon...now what?

    I did some googling, and it seems there's only a few actual dungeons with house girls in the whole country. A few in NYC and LA, one in Houston, and maybe others?

    LaurenAus, yes, while most of what we do at my dungeon is legal, some of it is definitely not (golden showers, strap on play, spitting, etc). We don't fuck the clients (not even a reach around while ramming them in the ass hahahaha), though. Every dungeon is different, most of the girls I work with have hard limits that are different (some girls won't do strap on sessions, some girls won't do golden/brown showers, some girls won't change diapers, etc), but I will say, most of the girls who won't do the illegal shit don't make a lot of money. It's unfortunate, but it's true. It's also not fast money by any means, stripping is definitely faster. I've been at my dungeon almost 4 months, and it's only been in the past month that I gained enough regulars to really live off my earnings. Still supplementing it with stripper money, but hoping to retire from dancing altogether by the end of the year.

    Also, depending on the dungeon, most won't require you to show your face in the photos you post. I have a 1/2 shot of my face, and once I added those, my bookings went through the roof. Dudes do want to see your face, they want to know who they're booking with. Good luck! You got this!
    Savannah > Atlanta > Dallas > Austin > New York

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