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Thread: bae against my dancing hustle

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    Member missviktoria's Avatar
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    Default bae against my dancing hustle

    I haven’t danced since I moved in with the bae, and wanted to get serious especially about making our family work.. but at the same time we need money.. and I used to make that shit, titties, ass and all, so I’m just wondering how will we make things work, living from paycheck to paycheck in sf, its been 3 months and I’ve wanted to hit the stage so many times, and I’ve tried to explain to him why, I wanna do it, and its cos I wanna make life more comfortable til we can leave and without hustling we’ll be here for a while.. I love him and I want our family to be good, but do I just tap out and just do nothing for his pride or do I do what I know how to do to make things easier at the risk of losing everything?




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    Featured Member SuperJa's Avatar
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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    Pretty sure every answer here is going to be "make that money".

    Tbh men are easily replaced, and you don't want to waste time with one that holds you back from dreams and goals by being too jealous over the fact that other guys might see you naked.

    You have a limited period of time where stripping is a viable career option, and a whole lifetime of potential relationships.

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    I think there are two possible root causes for his insecurity: his definition of cheating and will you cross it, and how will his friends see him (eg whipped or deadbeat). I can give you some outside the box advice (really experimental stuff) but you have talk to him to figure out the roots of his insecurity.

    Also by SF you mean San Francisco? Why the hell are people still living there unless you are in tech or healthcare related fields?

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    Money can accrue interest & bae statistically...won't.

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    You're only young and hot once and why waste it broke and unhappy because of some guy. I would rather be a hot single mom raking in money living comfortably and happily than broke living paycheck to paycheck with a man 'for the family'. Plus maybe he'll see you're serious about dancing and he can't control you so he'll just suck it up and deal with it. That's what happened in my last relationship (which only ended because I broke up with him). Also, if the two of you don't work out (which is a possibility whether you dance or stay broke with him) theres a million more men out there.

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    From what I read about dancing in so cal (from ladies in past threads) it's extras galore at the strip clubs and prob a hard hustle for dancers who just dance only. So you and your dude would have to agree on boundaries but if he's not even cool with just dancing then......you most likely will have to encourage HIM to step up and earn more or you will have to ditch him for a richer guy or go do the dancing thing/make your own money (which means you'll probably have to ditch him)
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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  12. #7
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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    You say "for the family" you mean kids too?

    Without kids the answer is easy. With kids the answer is the same probably but can be alot more complex

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    If you have kids, I wouldn't break up a family over making a little extra money. It's not like you guys are starving or homeless, right?

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    You say "for the family" you mean kids too?

    Without kids the answer is easy. With kids the answer is the same probably but can be alot more complex

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    I am sorry if I am trivializing your personal problem. I do not intentionally act like a smug bitch when I can help it. I just really do not understand why young women have back slid in feminist progress over the last 15 or so years. Seriously, my grandmother was more progressive in her thinking than some of the things I read on this site sometimes. SMH.

    I think we are all a little unclear about the familial situation; if you have children together or not. I am wagering if you do you may have been living apart for awhile. Really just making that up though from the fact you have been living together only 3 months. If he is "uncomfortable" with your dancing you know what he could do? He could be a MAN and go make some more money himself so you guys are not struggling. If you are worried about money 3 months in that is a pretty bad sign.

    Financial troubles are one of the main reasons people get divorced in this country. I didn't get the impression you two were married but... it can still cause issues in your relationship. You will both be much happier and have a more fulfilled life if you have some financial stability.

    I agree with Ariel, if you have children you SHOULD try and keep the family together. I also agree with DeathandTaxes if you are referring to San Francisco you may want to consider relocation. However, what is his particular reasoning for not wanting you to dance? Is it just that he is insecure and jealous? Is it something about the hours? Do you tend to get sloppy drunk when you dance and he does not want that for you? From the limited information in your post it seems to me like it is the first. I would be a hell of a lot more worried about my bank account than any man's "pride".
    XoXo Gia
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  19. #11
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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    To answer your how are people living here question...BARELY! everyone has a hustle or they've been here so damn long they are grandfathered in -___-

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    Member missviktoria's Avatar
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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    no kids, not married, he's the one that cheated, and I want us to relocate and we need to for his career but he's set in his own fucking ways. He never liked the idea of me dancing but when we broke up and I was on my own, I had to take care of myself, and did what I had to do so I think he's thinking oh well I'm here now so no need to do that but we're living check to check -___- you're right I can't pay my bills with his pride so I'm gonna do what I do

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    Quote Originally Posted by missviktoria View Post
    no kids, not married, he's the one that cheated, and I want us to relocate and we need to for his career but he's set in his own fucking ways. He never liked the idea of me dancing but when we broke up and I was on my own, I had to take care of myself, and did what I had to do so I think he's thinking oh well I'm here now so no need to do that but we're living check to check -___- you're right I can't pay my bills with his pride so I'm gonna do what I do
    Uhhhh did he care about how you felt when he cheated? No! IMO you need to dump his ass but at the very least, don't let him tell you what you can and can't do.


    Like, you made sacrifices and moved for him, to an expensive area, and he wants to tell you how to make money? No. If he can't take care of you or even be faithful ffs he has zero business telling you how to live your life.

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    I just feel like it's cool if you guys want to stay together, but being that he saw it fit to CHEAT ... i.e. ... fuck someone else, I am not sure why your dancing hustle is an issue. Probably because he knows if he was a female what HE would be doing as a dancer.

    I hate hearing of situations where guys put girls through shit then pick problems with their dancing etc.

    Maybe I'm a jaded hoe, but honestly in my years of experience ... the money will be more useful than him in the longterm and for your sanity.

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    Because he cheated, you should be able to do whatever you want, including dancing.

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    No kids together, not married, & he cheats ? I'm sorry, what's your question again ?

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    Quote Originally Posted by Jaylenn View Post
    No kids together, not married, & he cheats ? I'm sorry, what's your question again ?
    My thoughts exactly. Get out asap and forget about that loser.


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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    Yeah what family? lol if there's no kids and you aren't married run run run! Straight to the closest strip club.

    That's like the guys who cheat on their girlfriends/wives all the time but if she were to even get lunch with a male coworker or something he would freak the fuck out. They are so insecure it's crazy.

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    They are so insecure it's crazy.
    It's worse than that, they are immoral, it's the harem fantasy.

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    Default Re: bae against my dancing hustle

    I would choose money over this crap guy. Frankly, this guy cares nothing for your happiness nor dreams. He cheats on you then tells you not to dance. He just wants to keep in line and control your life. Dump him and you can always get a better man
    Wolves may lurk in every guise / Now as then, 'tis simple truth / Sweetest tongue has sharpest tooth.

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