Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 27

Thread: Long rant about my life right now

  1. #1
    Member Dorian's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Key West
    Posts
    27
    Thanks
    11
    Thanked 24 Times in 11 Posts

    Default Long rant about my life right now

    Hi girls.
    I'm struggling with life at the moment. I've been dancing for 4 years. I finally met a guy that doesn't give me any hassle about work. But he's terrible with money to the point where we sometimes doesn't even have enough to get a cheeseburger from McDonald's.

    I feel like I'm the main breadwinner. And because I feel guilty about my job I like to pay for things. To the point where I've got myself into debt.

    I didn't mind paying for stuff and almost supporting him, but I recently found out he has been messaging other girls on Facebook. These aren't friends, but just random girls. He won't show me the messages and said that I was being paranoid.

    I'm already under a lot of financial pressure and now he's doing this. Also today he receive a pay cut at work and phoned our landlord and told them we can't afford to pay for the house anymore. So effectively we will be homeless within a month.

    He's going to quit his job. So I'm now under even more pressure. February isn't a good time for dancing so the whole situation is worrying.

    I never used to be like this. I was successful, had savings, and confidence. And now I feel broken and stressed. I've been suffering anxiety with all the money worries.
    He's also got a child from a previous relationship who he doesn't see. But he said its the mums fault and not his. I don't know what to believe now or what to do.

    Part of me is tempted to finish our relationship. And I go off and travel like I've done before. I just feel like I've lost confidence and the belief in myself to do it.

    Sorry for the long rant of a post. Just needed to vent and try and make a way forward.

  2. #2
    Veteran Member persianprincess's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2016
    Posts
    703
    Thanks
    605
    Thanked 1,411 Times in 536 Posts
    My Mood
    Breezy

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    You need to seriously get rid of this person. Because messaging random girls on FB isn't the sign of a loyal guy. And you covering all the bills - he sounds like a total user, and probably only OK with your adult work because it affords him the ability to be financially irresponsible.

    Come on - if you feel broken in a situation rather than happy and supported it's not the right situation for you.

    Go, travel, save and enjoy.

    ** and rarely is the mom the issue when a father isn't seeing his child


  3. #3
    Featured Member We had a rabbit like you's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2016
    Location
    In a dive near you
    Posts
    1,039
    Thanks
    1,191
    Thanked 2,946 Times in 850 Posts
    My Mood
    Daring

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    This seems to be a common theme I see in my fellow adult workers..we feel guilty about our job and sure that no man will ever want us, so we settle for douchebags who use us. That's what this guy is doing..he's mooching off of you and that's why he's there. He will continue to bleed you dry like a parasite and when you're used up and broke he will move onto another host.
    You are working a legal honest job. You deserve respect. Don't settle for some fuckboy like that, don't put yourself on clearance cause you think you're damaged good..that's bullshit. You aren't.
    Dump this leech girl!!
    I've done business with men who think I'm as silly as I look; by the time they figure out I'm not, I've done got the money and gone -Dolly Parton

    a motherfukin hustler kamikaze//I used to bus tables but now I sell my body


  4. #4
    God/dess LoveyDovey's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    2,744
    Thanks
    5,454
    Thanked 7,169 Times in 2,230 Posts

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    ^^What they said.

    If a guy has a problem with you dancing, then they are the ones who should be helping you out financially so you won't have to dance as much. They shouldn't be leeching off you or manipulating you into thinking that you owe them something because you dance. That is ridiculous. Get rid of this guy. He seems like a total shade to me. And you deserve way better. Dump him, get your act together, and don't ever get in a situation like this again.

  5. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to LoveyDovey For This Useful Post:


  6. #5
    Veteran Member lady_lazarus's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Location
    somewhere over the rainbow
    Posts
    234
    Thanks
    175
    Thanked 357 Times in 100 Posts

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Describes my ex pretty well. Not great with $ bc I could always just go back to the club the next night. She was also cheating on me but telling me I was paranoid (after I found another girls panties in our bed!!!) I want to kick myself thinking of all the money wasted that I could have saved. I would echo everyone else here- get out! You will be so glad you did even if it feels hard now. We deserve better ! Good luck and stay strong

  7. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to lady_lazarus For This Useful Post:


  8. #6
    Veteran Member lady_lazarus's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Location
    somewhere over the rainbow
    Posts
    234
    Thanks
    175
    Thanked 357 Times in 100 Posts

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Also he sounds like an idiot--who calls the landlord the day they get a pay cut to tell them u can't pay the rent? That was a weird first move

  9. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to lady_lazarus For This Useful Post:


  10. #7
    Member Dorian's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Key West
    Posts
    27
    Thanks
    11
    Thanked 24 Times in 11 Posts

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Thanks for all the responses everyone.
    Crazy situation I know. Just needed to rant and get some sense spoken to me. If it was someone else I know I'd tell them to get out. You know what it's like though and you can't think straight and emotions are involved.

  11. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Dorian For This Useful Post:


  12. #8
    Veteran Member persianprincess's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2016
    Posts
    703
    Thanks
    605
    Thanked 1,411 Times in 536 Posts
    My Mood
    Breezy

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    ^^ yeh it's hard to make decisions when you're in the mix of everything. But I think deep down you know this isn't a winning situation. Get on the road and travel and I bet you clear your head xo

    (He will still be unable to afford a cheeseburger a month from now and 12 months from now)

  13. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to persianprincess For This Useful Post:


  14. #9
    God/dess
    Joined
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    6,948
    Thanks
    2,845
    Thanked 5,526 Times in 3,113 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Get rid of him now.

  15. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to slowpoke For This Useful Post:


  16. #10
    God/dess SnuffleUffleGrass's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2009
    Location
    HearstCastle, Rosebud
    Posts
    8,848
    Thanks
    22,676
    Thanked 17,513 Times in 6,696 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Anyone who loves you wouldn't contribute to this kind of stressful situation.

  17. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to SnuffleUffleGrass For This Useful Post:


  18. #11
    Veteran Member missykrissy's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    425
    Thanks
    1,850
    Thanked 552 Times in 219 Posts

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    I'm assuming you are not married, have no kids with this guy, and have at least decent earnings potential as a dancer? are both you and boy friend on the lease? Call your landlord and discuss. Tell him your boufriend has been skipping his meds and needs to move back in with his mom and you fully intend to make your payment on the first.

    Legally, you still have until the 10th of this month to make your rent, and your landlord has to file dipossessory against you if you don't (so get to work!). This guy sounds so slimy and untrustworthy to me I wouldn't leave him home alone if you keep cash or weed or anything like that.

  19. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to missykrissy For This Useful Post:


  20. #12
    Banned
    Joined
    Nov 2016
    Location
    I decided I am going to keep him! Thanks for asking!
    Posts
    461
    Thanks
    508
    Thanked 441 Times in 269 Posts
    My Mood
    Fine

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    If you stay with him past "now", then you are either insane or lack intelligence. If a grown man can't afford a burger from McDonalds, he must be a complete-pathetic-lowlife loser.

  21. #13
    Veteran Member BarbieNYC's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2014
    Location
    check profile first
    Posts
    674
    Thanks
    1,919
    Thanked 2,528 Times in 599 Posts

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Quote Originally Posted by DamnJolene View Post
    If you stay with him past "now", then you are either insane or lack intelligence.
    Totally not necessary that is the last thing she needs to hear. I get that you are trying to drive a point in, but there are ways to say it. Insinuating that someone lacks intelligence for not leaving a difficult situation right away is insulting and I guarantee she is not the only girl on this site who has been in this situation before. Ask any girl who has left a guy like this and it rarely was easy to do. But eventually it gets done and that's what she needs to focus on right now.

    Not everything is so black and white and it's easier said than done. Hindsight is the biggest 20/20. Good luck OP. There's some great advice on here.

  22. The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to BarbieNYC For This Useful Post:


  23. #14
    Moderator Genoveve's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2011
    Location
    Wonderland
    Posts
    4,585
    Thanks
    6,576
    Thanked 12,758 Times in 4,231 Posts
    My Mood
    Psychedelic

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    ^^^Completely agree. Also there's a lot of people in this country that are in deep poverty and struggle to afford food, doesn't make them 'complete losers.'

    But to the OP, dump him. There's millions of men in this country, there's no need to pick one who is broke, dragging you down and being unfaithful.

  24. The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to Genoveve For This Useful Post:


  25. #15
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Philly/NYC
    Posts
    581
    Thanks
    662
    Thanked 227 Times in 129 Posts

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    I rather be alone for the rest of my life to deal with a douche like this. That's fucked up. He's a male gold digger. I hope you leave him asap. No woman should pay for anything!

  26. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to sweet_baby For This Useful Post:


  27. #16
    God/dess rickdugan's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2010
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    4,570
    Thanks
    4,406
    Thanked 7,481 Times in 2,715 Posts
    My Mood
    Amused

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    This guy is a selfish man-child who is taking advantage of you. If you let him get on your tit completely by quitting his job and relying solely on you then things are just going to get even worse. Him calling the landlord to break the lease actually did you a favor in a way. If there is ever a time to break away cleanly, it is now, before you get sucked into another place with him. Now might be a good time to throw your stuff in a cheap storage place and hit the road for a while. IMHO you need to get him off of you before he becomes completely reliant on you. He's a grown man and can take care of himself.

    Seriously, I'll never understand this generation of weak young men who seem perfectly happy with placing all this earning pressure on their women. Does this guy have no male price whatsoever? But anyway...

    Good luck was you work through all of this.

  28. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to rickdugan For This Useful Post:


  29. #17
    Featured Member
    Joined
    May 2011
    Posts
    1,809
    Thanks
    2,282
    Thanked 3,638 Times in 1,173 Posts

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Omg I hate when guys say 'you're being paranoid'. When you catch your man doing something and he somehow turns it around on you to make you feel crazy and like you're in the wrong. When I look back on some of the things my ex told me that I believed it's laughable. Once I literally found a text in his phone to an ex saying he wanted to have beautiful babies with her and when I confronted him he said something like 'No that's what SHE texted ME earlier and I was just reiterating it!' and I believed him. Lol! Guys will literally say anything when they're caught being shady so no I'm 99% sure you aren't just 'being paranoid'.

    Anyway yes this guy is a loser and I think you know that. I think as soon as you get rid of the deadweight and get out on your own making money you'll get back to feeling confident again. The sooner you leave the sooner your life will get better! Don't waste anymore time with him.

  30. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to 22lligm For This Useful Post:


  31. #18
    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    16,440
    Thanks
    47,042
    Thanked 34,925 Times in 12,871 Posts
    My Mood
    Aggressive

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Drop the dead weight and you'll have money to get out of debt/keep your house.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

  32. #19
    God/dess Gia2608's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Miami/ Ft. Lauderdale
    Posts
    3,337
    Thanks
    4,235
    Thanked 3,664 Times in 1,451 Posts
    My Mood
    Cheerful

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    Does this guy have no male price whatsoever? But anyway...

    Good luck was you work through all of this.
    I am not sure if you meant male pride but male price is peerrrfect. It is almost the exact phrase I have been looking for to describe how men went from being Men of my father's generation, who respected women as an equal to these little fuck boys that expect a female to on one hand have equal pay and on the other only value her or her looks. Shit is getting confusing.
    XoXo Gia
    Danielle Fishell (the Dish): "If the Super-Star thing doesn't work out, Gia makes a great stripper name"

  33. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Gia2608 For This Useful Post:


  34. #20
    Banned
    Joined
    Nov 2016
    Location
    I decided I am going to keep him! Thanks for asking!
    Posts
    461
    Thanks
    508
    Thanked 441 Times in 269 Posts
    My Mood
    Fine

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    This guy is a selfish man-child who is taking advantage of you. If you let him get on your tit completely by quitting his job and relying solely on you then things are just going to get even worse. Him calling the landlord to break the lease actually did you a favor in a way. If there is ever a time to break away cleanly, it is now, before you get sucked into another place with him. Now might be a good time to throw your stuff in a cheap storage place and hit the road for a while. IMHO you need to get him off of you before he becomes completely reliant on you. He's a grown man and can take care of himself.

    Seriously, I'll never understand this generation of weak young men who seem perfectly happy with placing all this earning pressure on their women. Does this guy have no male price whatsoever? But anyway...

    Good luck was you work through all of this.
    I think it's something in the water.

  35. #21
    God/dess rickdugan's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2010
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    4,570
    Thanks
    4,406
    Thanked 7,481 Times in 2,715 Posts
    My Mood
    Amused

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Quote Originally Posted by Gia2608 View Post
    I am not sure if you meant male pride but male price is peerrrfect. It is almost the exact phrase I have been looking for to describe how men went from being Men of my father's generation, who respected women as an equal to these little fuck boys that expect a female to on one hand have equal pay and on the other only value her or her looks. Shit is getting confusing.
    Yes, I meant male pride, lol, but running with that is cool too.

  36. #22
    God/dess SnuffleUffleGrass's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2009
    Location
    HearstCastle, Rosebud
    Posts
    8,848
    Thanks
    22,676
    Thanked 17,513 Times in 6,696 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    Quote Originally Posted by Gia2608 View Post
    I am not sure if you meant male pride but male price is peerrrfect. It is almost the exact phrase I have been looking for to describe how men went from being Men of my father's generation, who respected women as an equal to these little fuck boys that expect a female to on one hand have equal pay and on the other only value her or her looks. Shit is getting confusing.
    My dad said this to me years ago (but in Spanish.) The state of the American Male is not good.

    My feelings about the guy in the OP situation is that he's either on drugs or comes from a trailer park grifter family. OP lose that guy!!!

  37. The Following User Says Thank You to SnuffleUffleGrass For This Useful Post:


  38. #23
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2015
    Location
    In your man's arms
    Posts
    429
    Thanks
    215
    Thanked 1,054 Times in 319 Posts
    My Mood
    Happy

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    You're dating a loser. Time to move on. Don't let your emotions cloud your good judgement. Like why are you supporting a grown ass man? This situation isn't rocket science. It's very easy to solve.

  39. #24
    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Cash-Stack-istan Island
    Posts
    14,704
    Thanks
    6,564
    Thanked 11,625 Times in 3,697 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    A grown ass man with the mentality of a child. Drop his good for nothing ass NOW.

  40. The Following User Says Thank You to Vyanka For This Useful Post:


  41. #25
    God/dess carmen_b's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2007
    Location
    the mountains ....
    Posts
    14,202
    Thanks
    15,165
    Thanked 21,346 Times in 9,308 Posts

    Default Re: Long rant about my life right now

    I would give him 1-2 weeks to find work and leave if he doesn't.
    There's server / barista / bartender jobs out there. He could start working today and he should if he has quit his other gig.
    He sounds terrible all around. Tell him the truth . Tell him you are exhausted being with someone with bad money habits and just break it off.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. My Life Rant
    By JJLights89 in forum Life Support
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 04-05-2013, 10:23 PM
  2. long stool equates to long life????
    By tropicalust in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 07-30-2011, 08:48 PM
  3. Long rant, life has gone far off from what I'd like.
    By NekkoStarz in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 01-29-2008, 08:14 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •