My best friend is exactly 2 years younger than me, and I met her about 3 years ago. We both started dancing long before meeting each other, and she quit roughly 8 months ago after a bad incident a work (a guy touched her vagina, grabbed her money bag and darted out of the club). She has since popped into the club one single time and often mentions how she may pop back in for a few extra bucks. However, she also talks about how much happier she is since quitting
Now I've been chronically depressed as long as I can remember (far before dancing), however I can confidently say my self-esteem has skyrocketed and my anxiety has nearly disappeared since starting dancing. I've definitely had some bad incidents that left me taking breaks from work and whatnot, but overall the pros have outweighed the cons emotionally for me, at least in my opinion. I studied sales and the male mind, and basically worked my ass off to become a top earner, and I did. My friend is beautiful and a great dancer but never really got the hustle down, so I can see that the bad nights may have taken a toll on her self-esteem.
Well, about 5 months ago I decided to get a day job. I've gone to the strip club only about 7 times total in the past 5 months, as I haven't needed to go as much. Aside from this my behavior and emotions have stayed generally the same from what I can tell. However out of seemingly nowhere, the past few times my friend knew I was working she started talking about how she thinks I shouldn't dance because it depresses me. Um...what? I asked her what she meant and she basically said she's much happier since quitting and thinks my depression stems mainly from dancing. I'm sure her intentions are good, but I find this confusing because sometimes she'll act like she wants to come with me (never does tho), then other times discourages me from going in. She literally says stuff like "I don't think you should go in" or "It makes you depressed." This has happened about the past 3-4 times I've gone in. I told her politely once that I appreciated her concern but it didn't make me as depressed as she thought and I was going to do what I need to do. She acted distant and strange after this.
I guess I'm just wondering how to handle this and if I'm right to find this annoying, even a bit...controlling? Not sure if that's the right word. I just don't appreciate getting a psychoanalysis on my depression from someone who's not only younger than me, but has sent mixed messages on their feeling about the industry in general. I also feel strongly that everyone's experience with dancing is going to be very different, and for some people it may be super toxic and others it could be exactly what they need to get on their feet and build some confidence.
I'm curious if anyone else has gone through this/knows why she might be acting this way. Thanks!
(Note: I'm not announcing to her every time I go in, but she usually knows because we communicate so frequently that it would be difficult to hide, and I don't feel I should need to...especially from an ex-dancer)