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Thread: Is it even possible he's not lying?

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    Default Is it even possible he's not lying?

    I've been seeing this guy for a few months. Overall he hasn't given me much reason not to trust him. He was born and raised in the town we both currently reside in, and as far as I can tell this definitely checks out.

    Well, not long ago we went to a winery together and he paid with a card. On the receipt I noticed the address associated with his account was a PO Box in New Mexico (nowhere near where we are). I asked him about it and he said he had no idea why it said that. I later googled the PO Box and it was in fact associated with his name, though I couldn't get any more info from the google search. There was one letter changed in the name on the account causing a misspelling (For example if his name was "Kevin" it said "Kevni") and the last name was accurate.

    Is it even possible he would have "no idea" about the PO Box? I've dated a psychopath in the past so maybe I just have a hard time trusting people, other than this I have no reason not to trust him. But I'm wondering how this could even be possible or if he's obviously hiding something?

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Doesn't sound right to me @ all, sorry..& how the fuck did he get a PO Box w/a credit card?? I can't get one b/c of that. Even when I got my bank debit card, I had to go to the actual bank itself to pick it up, & had to convince them to let me do that.
    He's definitely lying.


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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    I have had business credit cards go to a PO Box I had. However how would he randomly not know he had a PO Box in his name - you need an ID to open most. And how would he be holding a card and not know you were linked to a PO Box that was it's billing address.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Maybe he is a credit card scammer and his entire identity is not correct? They often receive credit cards to PO Boxes, secondary cards etc, and have them.

    Not sure what use a PO box would be to someone in New Mexico if they are never there or someone else doesn't have access to forward stuff.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Sounds super fishy. Are there any other red flags? I don't want to be presumptuous, but the fact that you say you dated a psychopath before doesn't bode well. We often have patterns in dating/relationships that are hard to break. I would be cautious moving forward with this guy... he seems to be lying. It's not that easy to get a PO Box attached to a credit card, let alone not know about it.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    He could be claiming a residence there maybe because taxes in that state are cheaper than where you live. Which is tax fraud. Then have that place put all his mail in a box & ship it to him. Living in Miami, many people only live here part of the time & are out of the country for a long time. Many of them use P.O. Boxes & have all the mail boxed up & shipped to where they are currently.

    Unless you are planning to get serious with him, is it really any of your biz? If this is leading to marriage or co-habitation then an honest conversation about money in general is needed.

    Also I'd run a criminal back ground check on him too.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    he knows why he has a po box in new mexico why the card's address is attached to it . CMON don't be dumb he's lying to you . He maybe used to live there . Idk why he wouldnt just admit that tho

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Color me clueless, why is our account address on a credit card receipt? Or, am I just not real observant that it's there and I've just never noticed? It makes me uncomfortable to think a purchase receipt of any kind shows my address!

    PS: It's for this very reason (stalking/crime) I have my PO Box listed on all my banking, even CC's. To do so the big Wall Street national bank I'm with verified & noted my physical dwelling address, and then allowed me to use a PO Box for receiving mail. So it can be done. Smaller banks & credit unions have given me a hard time about mailing to a POB, and if that's the case I don't open an account or just use it for savings, not debit or credit transactions.

    And it is possible that whomever set-up the account transposed letters. It happens. But being cautious is a good idea!
    “Do what you do so well that they will want to see it again and bring their friends.” ~ Walt Disney

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    He's seems like he has something he's hiding.

    You could possibly hire someone to find out more like a private investigator. Or you could ditch him for telling a bold faced lie.

    if he's going to lie about that then what else is he going to lie about or already lied about?

    and this the same dude you asked about a while back? Pay attention to these warning flags.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    I think if this is an intimate relationship (especially one that also includes emotional and financial) the woman should have a right to know what's going on.

    Wouldn't you want to know this stuff before you get too seriously involved/ move in/agree to marry?

    Hes the dumb ass for paying with the card and leaving a trail of evidence he doesn't want her to know about. Plus it's not like she asked for his tax returns, credit history, bank account info, etc. all she asked was a reasonable question about the address on the receipt he had lying out for her to see

    If a dude is getting to know your pussy walls day and night you have every right to know everything possible about his ass. I personally would not continue intimate physical relations until I got the truth.

    Yes. Background check. But just know some of these characters change their names (and this guy intentionally misspelled his name to try to make it harder to find out the real info) so you may need someone with experience to help you get to the truth.

    Just be careful with this guy.


    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post
    He could be claiming a residence there maybe because taxes in that state are cheaper than where you live. Which is tax fraud. Then have that place put all his mail in a box & ship it to him. Living in Miami, many people only live here part of the time & are out of the country for a long time. Many of them use P.O. Boxes & have all the mail boxed up & shipped to where they are currently.

    Unless you are planning to get serious with him, is it really any of your biz? If this is leading to marriage or co-habitation then an honest conversation about money in general is needed.

    Also I'd run a criminal back ground check on him too.

    Perhaps it's odd a typical store printed so much data on the receipt but it's not uncommon for an invoice to have your address. That's why I think that dude is lying because he linked the card he used to the po box.

    The banks and merchants know ALOT about you.

    The other day at Starbucks I ran my debit card and unbeknownst to me they can run it like a prepaid card and see your bank balance!!! I don't think they can do that unless you ask but just knowing prepaid and gift cards aren't the only cards they can balance check, they can do that on your standard debit/check card too.

    We are not as invisible as we think we are.

    That's why cash is still preferred for people who don't want all their data exposed.

    Quote Originally Posted by JoyKitten View Post
    Color me clueless, why is our account address on a credit card receipt? Or, am I just not real observant that it's there and I've just never noticed? It makes me uncomfortable to think a purchase receipt of any kind shows my address!

    PS: It's for this very reason (stalking/crime) I have my PO Box listed on all my banking, even CC's. To do so the big Wall Street national bank I'm with verified & noted my physical dwelling address, and then allowed me to use a PO Box for receiving mail. So it can be done. Smaller banks & credit unions have given me a hard time about mailing to a POB, and if that's the case I don't open an account or just use it for savings, not debit or credit transactions.

    And it is possible that whomever set-up the account transposed letters. It happens. But being cautious is a good idea!
    Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 04-30-2017 at 08:14 AM.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    LOL I have friends in low places, i know exactly why all of them are strictly cash.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Lol. You're right - included with normal law abiding citizens who value their privacy is a portion of people who use privacy to break the law. I didn't mean to promote a cash only existence (common with people who hide and or break the law) but in a digital world where you have virtually no privacy, the less you swipe a card the less the merchants and banks and ISP know about you.

    If I were that dude I at least would have paid for the date with cash.

    But its probably a good thing he didn't because it's funny how the universe gives you signs when something seems off. This event could be what the OP needs to evaluate her relationship.

    Hopefully everything works out in the OP favor
    Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 04-30-2017 at 03:04 PM.
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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post
    He could be claiming a residence there maybe because taxes in that state are cheaper than where you live. Which is tax fraud. Then have that place put all his mail in a box & ship it to him. Living in Miami, many people only live here part of the time & are out of the country for a long time. Many of them use P.O. Boxes & have all the mail boxed up & shipped to where they are currently.

    Unless you are planning to get serious with him, is it really any of your biz? If this is leading to marriage or co-habitation then an honest conversation about money in general is needed.

    Also I'd run a criminal back ground check on him too.
    Are all these things my business? Not necessarily, but the fact he blatantly denied having any knowledge of the PO Box when he clearly did is not sitting right with me. Good call on the background check

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Quote Originally Posted by JoyKitten View Post
    Color me clueless, why is our account address on a credit card receipt? Or, am I just not real observant that it's there and I've just never noticed? It makes me uncomfortable to think a purchase receipt of any kind shows my address!

    PS: It's for this very reason (stalking/crime) I have my PO Box listed on all my banking, even CC's. To do so the big Wall Street national bank I'm with verified & noted my physical dwelling address, and then allowed me to use a PO Box for receiving mail. So it can be done. Smaller banks & credit unions have given me a hard time about mailing to a POB, and if that's the case I don't open an account or just use it for savings, not debit or credit transactions.

    And it is possible that whomever set-up the account transposed letters. It happens. But being cautious is a good idea!
    I actually called the winery and asked if their receipts typically have the billing address in the upper corner. They said if you open an account with them that their receipts always do that (weird I know). Another strange thing is he said he'd never been to this winery before upon going....yet he clearly has an account open with them. Time to run to the nearest exit and never look back

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Yes, please be safe! I dont get why he is hiding this stuff? So I feel like based on his playing dumb, there is something to hide.

    Omg the amount of vetting you have to do on people these days is insane...
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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Better to know now than after moving in with him or married. There are 3 kinds of people who are good to finding out the truth & digging up dirt.
    Reporters
    Spies
    EVERY FEMALE in the world.

    Since you both live in the same town for a long time, do you know his parents? I'd start asking questions about it all in front of his Mom? See how she reacts & what she says.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    ^ LOL Sam, you described it perfectly!!
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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    I have not seen of my information other than my name and last 4 digits of the account number on a credit card receipt, sometimes not even my name.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post
    Better to know now than after moving in with him or married. There are 3 kinds of people who are good to finding out the truth & digging up dirt.
    Reporters
    Spies
    EVERY FEMALE in the world.

    Since you both live in the same town for a long time, do you know his parents? I'd start asking questions about it all in front of his Mom? See how she reacts & what she says.
    Omg Sam your posts crack me up! I love busting dudes out in front of their parents esp when they deserve it. Sometimes the parents stay in denial and won't believe a word you say other times the parents know good and damn well what type of dude they contributed to raising. That's actually a good thread topic.
    “Cook for him like a housewife, fuck him good like a nympho….pay the rent and the car note, he invests in me like crypto”

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Well, over men lying.
    Holding them accountable & calling them out on it is a lesson that lots of them have coming. WE are always told to be nice, well they aren't & don't play by those same rules.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    I also think it is very odd that there is an address on the receipt. No-one has my address that I have an account with unless I have a store card there. I have an "account" at the high end wine store, my grocery store, high end retailers, Jiffy Lube... etc. I never have my address on my receipts. I think something is up, but- no offense to the OP whatsoever but calling the store and grilling them and him is a bit... intense.

    Is it possible some other person has an account with that store that has a similar name to him? You said there was a letter off in the spelling.
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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Quote Originally Posted by somechick99 View Post
    I actually called the winery and asked if their receipts typically have the billing address in the upper corner. They said if you open an account with them that their receipts always do that (weird I know). Another strange thing is he said he'd never been to this winery before upon going....yet he clearly has an account open with them. Time to run to the nearest exit and never look back
    OMG girl have I got some sharing on this topic.

    I busted a Craigslist scammer (female) this way by Googling her name given for a transaction & finding her criminal info (she was mis spelling her name by one letter on CL but her legal name was in the paper for a theft felony.)

    & I dated a very very fucked up guy who was spending his settlement money like water & I noticed ALL the waitstaff at a place we dined at kept looking at me funny. (At the time he was going through some very bad times due to drugs & mental problems so I think he brought a new girl to the same place every few days...even though he looked like a miserable lump. It was basically the waitstaff apparently thinking "how the HELL is a loser like that having a different girl dine with him all the time...?".)

    So yeah TL ; DR .....When your past experiences, gut feeling AND other people are making you feel like you need the get the f away from someone....GET AWAY.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Quote Originally Posted by Gia2608 View Post
    I also think it is very odd that there is an address on the receipt. No-one has my address that I have an account with unless I have a store card there. I have an "account" at the high end wine store, my grocery store, high end retailers, Jiffy Lube... etc. I never have my address on my receipts. I think something is up, but- no offense to the OP whatsoever but calling the store and grilling them and him is a bit... intense.

    Is it possible some other person has an account with that store that has a similar name to him? You said there was a letter off in the spelling.
    When I called I just asked if their receipts normally have the billing address on them because I "wanted to send a gift box for a friend online and didn't want my address popping up on their receipt." Lol I know it's a somewhat crazy thing to have done, but in terms of how the store took it I made sure it appeared normal. I also did this to see if he had some sort of special credit card account open, since in most normal situations the address would not have appeared. However they did confirm that if you're in their system already, the billing address shows on their receipts.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Girl, play amateur FBI. There are plenty of websites that can help you with that. You'd be surprised by how easy it is to get information. It's actually scary how much information is freely available to the public. I'm sorry but nobody has a PO box that they don't know about. That's bogus. He's lying.

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    Default Re: Is it even possible he's not lying?

    Yeah, Wendi's totally right. I have one and my husband and I had to show ID to open it. The misspelling on the CC is weird, too.
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