Hello everyone!
I hope you are all doing well today. So, I've started going to SCs recently for numerous reasons regarding my mental health and that I'm trying to explore my sexuality in a comfortable and accepted way. I have never been with anyone sexually. I have never been in a relationship. I haven't even gotten my first consensual kiss until just earlier this year; I am 23. This isn't terribly odd, I am learning. I grew up hating myself for being sexual and having sexual desires, a byproduct of how my parents taught me to react to the world, and eventually this complex really began seeping into my relationships and my overall treatment of people. Even when I became aware of it in college, it still made it difficult, near impossible, for me to date people or even navigate my own body. I recently decided that to begin the process of deconstructing this complex, I needed to normalize sex in a controlled environment, and I thought maybe a strip club could be a place where at least I could interact with nudity and normalize it. I have been going to a few for a few weeks now, and it's really been wonderful how more at ease I feel with myself and my body and women in general.
That said, and here is my question~ I go because I feel like it helps me heal as a person. I could not in good conscience continue if I felt like I was hurting people in this process. There are a lot of stigmas and urban legends towards SCs that exist in my perception of them, about the people who become dancers and why they are dancers. And no ever said nice things. I read thought catalog article earlier today about how loathsome clients are. What I want to know:
Is there a way I can continue attending and be a positive person in that environment? I know a job is a job and I avoid white knight/savior complexes. I'm not interested in saving anyone, I feel that's super condescending. What I want to know is do you have advice on how I can let the women (or men, I'm making some plans because I want to explore my sexuality wholly) feel safe, comfortable, appreciated and, if possible, good~ not in the erotic way, but if I can do that too without being disgusting, then sure. But I don't want to just stop going, either. But I will if I must.
I just want to have a positive energy in an industry I get the feeling can be a bit overwhelming.
If I've offended anyone with this, please let me know. I'm not trying to, I promise.


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